A/N: So I decided once again to try my hand at writing some fanfiction, this time about a headcanon I've had for a while...based off of the events of chapter one of 'Ghosts of Onyx'. Also a big thank you to my cohort Firerwolf for helping me make this story as good as it could be. It is set within the canon/timeline of their amazing 'Spartan Love' series of stories (which I highly recommend you all read), and there are references to this throughout. I am planning on writing a sequel to this story as well - though submitting it as a second chapter or as a separate story entirely, I haven't quite decided yet. I'm still really new at writing so any constructive comments/critiques are welcome. Thanks! :)
John sat on his cot; the datapad with the mission report he'd been reviewing was held loosely in his hand, forgotten. Instead his eyes were focused on the pair of Spartans that were sitting on another cot across the small room that was serving as Blue Team's temporary quarters. After their close call with General Graves and the rebels during their last mission, the Spartans' MJOLNIR Armor had to be taken for repairs while they awaited their orders for their next assignment. The back of John's mind was still buzzing with thoughts about what had happened on Victoria. But at the moment what he was witnessing in the barracks was consuming his full attention.
Kelly was sitting beside Kurt. The two of them were talking and laughing as they - based on what John could overhear - reminisced about their training days. That wasn't what was bothering him though. He narrowed his gaze at Kurt's hands; specifically, the one that was currently resting on Kelly's leg. Every once in a while John could see Kurt squeeze Kelly's knee when either of them laughed, and move it lightly along her thigh as they spoke.
John knew better than anyone that nobody put a hand on Kelly unless she expressly allowed it. And while friendly pat on the back or a shoulder-bump wasn't an unusual amount of casual contact for her to have with any other Spartan, what Kurt was currently doing wasn't much different than what John would do while talking to Kelly when they were relatively alone. A strange tightness settled in John's chest as he continued to glower at the pair. This wasn't the first time John noticed Blue Team's newest member taking a particular interest in Kelly either. Kurt had sought her out for more one-on-one time than he had anyone else. Often during downtime that John would've been spending with Kelly otherwise - like right now. It was just one more thing that Kurt's recent placement on Blue Team seemed to throw out of balance.
Kurt and Kelly suddenly stood up from the cot and John forced himself to look away so that he wouldn't be caught staring. As they walked across the room, still engrossed in conversation, John's mind went to work. He'd always been able to tackle whatever dilemma or obstacle he faced head-on until he won. However, this sort of situation was unlike anything he'd ever dealt with before. And he doubted a direct approach would be the best course of action. John quickly made his decision. And though being subtle wasn't his best skill, he knew he would have to muster whatever tact he could for what he was about to do.
John stood from his own bed just as Kelly and Kurt passed him, and cleared his throat. "Kelly, may I have a word with you?"
Kelly stopped and turned around to face him, with Kurt following suit. "We were just about to head to the gym for a workout. What's up, Chief?"
John bristled slightly at her use of his rank. Normally she only addressed him so impersonally when they were in combat, and even then not all the time. Kurt stood off to the side, a benign smile on his face as he watched Kelly. John then addressed the other man directly, "Alone, if you please, Kurt."
"Oh. Of course, Chief." Kurt looked over to John and nodded, then turned back to Kelly. "I'll go to the gym and you can meet me there when you're ready."
"Sure thing," Kelly answered. "Use the time to get in a decent warm-up. You're going to need it if you want to spar with me," she added with a sly grin.
"I'll be ready, Bunny," Kurt teased as he lightly bumped his shoulder against Kelly's and walked away toward the door.
Kurt's final words left John feeling like he'd just been hit. Even though nobody else knew that was his private nickname for her, no one besides John ever called Kelly "Bunny". As he watched Kurt's retreating figure, thoughts of cold-cocking the other Spartan filled John's head until he disappeared when the door closed shut behind him.
"Something's obviously bothering you." John's attention was turned back to Kelly as she spoke, and she took a step toward him. "So, what do you want to talk about?"
John let out a measured breath through his nose to calm himself. "I require your insight about a few things regarding our team." He figured it was best to approach Kelly with the broader issue on his mind first, before getting into specifics.
"Okay. Shoot." Her voice sounded cautious, but Kelly made no further comment as she leaned back on her heels and crossed her arms over her chest, ready to listen.
"Why do you think Kurt was assigned to our unit?" John asked plainly.
"How am I supposed to know what goes through the higher-ups' heads when they send us any kind of order?" Kelly joked as she shrugged slightly. "Though if I had to take a guess," she continued, becoming more serious, "it would be because they simply felt we needed more personnel. We're Blue Team; we go on the most critical missions. So it's best that we have a full roster." Kelly paused, and bit her bottom lip for a moment. "...Ever since we lost Sam, it's like there's a hole here. Not just in manpower, but in morale too. Perhaps they thought Kurt, with his upbeat personality and people skills, would be a good fit for us."
"Kurt will never replace Sam," John said tersely, shaking his head.
"I know that. No one can...I'm just trying to see their reasoning, that's all," Kelly replied gently. Her gaze dropped to the floor and a stiff silence settled between them for a moment.
"So why not send Jorge? Or Will? If they only wanted to add someone that would balance out the—" John searched for the right word, "—temperament, of our team. Why send us Kurt, who is clearly more suited to leading his own squad?"
"So you're worried that the brass are looking to replace you. Is that it?" Kelly asked in response. "That's ridiculous. Even though Kurt's Green Team was the one that beat us the most during training exercises, you've always been our leader. Not just of Blue Team, but of the Spartans as a whole. It would be unwise for anyone to try and shake up our internal chain of command now. Not when we're fighting a war on two fronts."
"Right. Because I proved myself worthy of leadership during our last mission," John replied, his sarcasm clear. "My inability to properly read into the situation got us captured by the enemy. If Kurt hadn't been there, there wouldn't have been anything I could've done to save you or the others. I nearly got us all killed."
"What happened with the rebels on Victoria wasn't strictly your fault," Kelly stated, her tone adamant.
"But as the leader it's still my responsibility. And Kurt succeeded where I failed," John argued, unable to keep some of the bitterness he felt from seeping into his voice.
"That's the very reason why we work as a team," Kelly assured him, reaching out and placing her hand on John's arm in a comforting gesture. "To compliment each other's strengths and make up for each other's weaknesses. And like you said on the Pelican ride back, Kurt should have made his concerns clear to you from the start. It was simply a failure to communicate. It won't happen again, I'm sure of it. If anything, it was likely his desire to not usurp your authority that led him to keep quiet about his 'funny feeling'. Kurt isn't trying to take anything away from you."
This was the lead-in that John had been waiting for, but he still hesitated for a moment before speaking his next words. "Perhaps he's not interested in the team itself...but what about you?"
"What do you mean?" Kelly quirked her brow and tilted her head, confused.
"I mean the way he's been talking to you lately. And looking at you. Not to mention the fact that he also had his hands all over you, and even called you 'Bunny' just a minute ago. Why did you let him do those things?" John crossed his arms and frowned slightly.
Kelly rolled her eyes, putting her hands on her hips. "That's just Kurt. He's like that when he talks to everyone. He's tactile. And it's not impossible that someone else would think to use the word 'bunny' as another way to acknowledge I'm our team's 'rabbit', you know."
"It's not about the words being related by definition," John huffed irritably. "It's about the fact that 'Bunny' is my nickname for you. And you still haven't really answered my question."
Kelly was starting to look aggravated herself now. "Kurt and I are just friends. And I'd like to remind you that the only person who's ever actually 'had his hands all over me', is you."
"Well based on what I just saw, he's not too far from being allowed the same privileges," John said brusquely.
Kelly recoiled in anger at his words. "So is that what you think of me? That I'll just fall into the arms of anyone who comes along with some sweet nothings and let them feel me up?" She scowled at him as her fists clenched tightly at her sides, and her voice rose dangerously close to a shout.
John suddenly realized his misstep and tried to clarify his thought process. However he was having trouble articulating what he wanted to say, as usual. "No. That's not what I think. I just meant...he has the ability to approach you in more sociable ways. Ways that seem solely in the interest of friendship at first. But then what if he keeps getting closer to you, keeps touching you, and starts saying things that make you..." John trailed off, feeling his cheeks start to burn red. He looked away from Kelly, thoroughly flustered.
"Nobody can make me do anything I don't want to do. You know that." Out of the corner of his eye, John saw the female Spartan's posture relax. "I honestly haven't noticed Kurt being anything more than friendly since he joined our team. But even if you are right about him wanting more from me, do you really not trust me to handle myself if he starts being forward?" Kelly's tone had softened considerably as well; though now instead of angry, she sounded rather hurt.
"It's not a question of trusting you. I know I can lose to Kurt in more areas than just soldiering. And you're not something I'm willing to risk losing." John sighed and found he still couldn't meet her gaze. He was quite ashamed for having insulted the person he respected and cared for most of all.
Kelly let out an exasperated breath, and after a brief pause, she moved closer to him. "John..." He felt her hand move up to rest on his cheek, "Look at me." John did as she ordered, and turned his head so that he was looking into her deep blue eyes. "Of all the things you have to worry about, losing me to someone else is not one of them. I promise," she said softly. Kelly then leaned up and pressed a tender kiss to his lips. After drawing back, she lowered her hand so that it was resting on his chest above his heart. "It always has been, and always will be, only you."
John reached out, and Kelly didn't shy away as he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. "Kurt is like you, and is so much better with words than I am," he said as he rested his cheek against the softness of her hair. "I can't compete with that. That's why I don't like him touching you so familiarly either. Because I know that even I can only do so because you let me. And because it's the best way that I know how to tell you what I feel."
John loosened his grip and pulled away, gently sliding his hands down her back and over her sides to rest on her waist. When he leaned in Kelly instinctively moved her arms up and around his neck. He kissed her once more, forgetting for the moment that they were still in the barracks where someone could walk in on them without warning. John simply took comfort in her taste and her touch. In knowing that this feeling was something that was still shared between him and Kelly alone.
After a time they were forced to part for air, but Kelly stayed close as she gently nuzzled his neck. "Feel better now?" she asked coyly, as she pressed a series of feather-light kisses against his jaw. "Did you get all that over-worrying out of your system?"
"Yes," John answered lamely. He was still feeling rather foolish for having doubted the strength of his relationship with Kelly. He should have known better from the start. Still, John was grateful he'd been able to have this conversation with her and get what was bothering him out in the open. Kelly's ability to understand him in spite of his lack of finesse was just one of the many reasons why he needed her by his side. "Thank you for helping me resolve my dilemma." He said with mock-formality as he released her and took a step backward.
Kelly shook her head, but there was a small smile still lingering on her lips. "Anytime, Chief," she teased as she took a halfhearted swat at his shoulder.
"You know I don't like it when you call me that when we're not on a mission," John groused.
"What? You're the one who's always saying we should be extra careful about keeping us a secret from the others. Maybe if we engaged in more public displays of affection, Kurt wouldn't feel the need to flirt with me," Kelly replied airily.
"Kelly, as much as I wish we could, you know why we can't do that," John reasoned. "Besides, I thought you just said you didn't think he was coming on to you before?"
"Relax, John. I'm only messing with you. Though if he ever does try to get frisky, I'll draw the line." John frowned at her and Kelly only laughed. "But for your sake, I will be sure to let Kurt know that 'Rabbit' is the only acceptable nickname he's allowed to call me."
"Fair enough," John agreed. There was one small thing that was still nagging at him, however. He wondered if he should just let it go, as he didn't want to unintentionally offend Kelly again, but his curiosity won out. "I have to ask though...how come you don't think he's been acting like he's interested in you? You're normally the one to pick up on those kinds of signals from other people, not me. That is partly why I was so concerned."
"Well, did you ever consider the possibility that I'm so fully invested in our relationship that I don't really notice when guys make passes at me anymore?" Kelly crossed her arms and quirked an eyebrow at him, but her tone was light. "After being cat-called by marines and eyed-up by technicians when getting in and out of armor for the past six years, I guess I've sort of become numb to it. That kind of attention from other people simply doesn't matter to me. You and I are together, and that is all I need." Kelly then glanced to the side for a moment. "Though if you were ever interested in taking things further, I certainly wouldn't object," she added.
"How so?" John asked, cocking his head, slightly confused by her aside.
Kelly sighed and waved a hand in dismissal, "Never mind. That's not important right now." She looked back to him and smiled slightly. "So, are you coming to the gym?" She started to walk toward the door and motioned for him to follow her. "You can watch me run circles around your competition," she joked.
"I really should finish going over those mission reports," John admitted.
Before he could do anything to stop her, in a flash Kelly had moved over to John's cot and grabbed his datapad. Her nimble fingers were tapping something onto the screen, and by the time John had taken the few steps needed to reach her, Kelly was already holding the tablet out to him in triumph.
"Oops. Looks like the password has been reset," she said with a wily smirk.
"Kelly..." John warned. It wasn't that he disliked having these types of little contests with her, but he couldn't let them interrupt his work.
"You're just taking a break. Come to the gym, watch, maybe even workout a little; take your mind off things for a while. And then when we're done I'll give you the password," Kelly appealed.
John let out a breath in resignation. But he couldn't help the corners of his mouth from turning up in the barest smile. "Alright," he conceded, and he walked beside Kelly as they exited the barracks together.
John busied himself in the gym by doing a light workout consisting mostly of calisthenics and stretching exercises. All the while keeping an eye on the sparring ring, where Kelly proceeded to thoroughly trounce Kurt in several CQC matches. She was slowing herself down, as she always had to do when sparring with the other Spartans, though not as much as John felt she normally would. Part of him hoped that wasn't on his account, but then another part didn't really care either. Watching Kelly fight with such grace and power - outside of actual combat without having to worry about her safety - was mesmerizing.
After about an hour of being tossed around by the fastest Spartan, Kurt officially surrendered. John watched from the sidelines as the pair left the ring and approached him. Kelly was speaking to Kurt about his technique and giving him a few pointers. She stopped once they reached John and patted Kurt on the back, "I would say not bad for a first try, but..." Kelly shrugged her shoulders and trailed off sarcastically, "You're going to need a lot of work before you're up to Blue Team standards."
"Well I'm certainly willing to learn," Kurt responded with a wide smile. "Especially when it's from the best."
"That's the spirit. You'll make a fine addition to the squad yet," Kelly said, grinning back. She then looked to John, "I'm going to shower off. You can meet me in the locker room if you want to continue our discussion from earlier, John." Kelly turned and John just barley saw her wink at him before she started to walk back across the gym to the hall that lead to the showers.
John did his best to banish the the slight flush that was threatening to manifest itself on his face. He glanced over at Kurt and saw that the other man had a somewhat wistful expression as he watched Kelly go. After she was out of sight, he finally spoke. "She's...really something else. Isn't she?"
"Yes. She is," John answered simply, still watching Kurt carefully. "That's why she's always my Blue-Two," he added, trying to keep his tone casual.
"I'm not surprised. She's the perfect teammate, an excellent soldier, and a great friend." Kurt then turned to face John. "And if any of us live long enough to settle down, whoever ends up winning her heart will be a lucky one indeed. Wouldn't you agree?" he said. Kurt's voice was pleasant, but his hazel eyes were narrowed at John, clearly waiting to analyze his response.
John furrowed his brow. The implication behind Kurt's last statement was not lost to him. This was quickly turning into one of those strange conversations where the words spoken and the actual meaning of what was said were not quite the same. Kelly had explained the concept to John once before as being similar to how soldiers would talk in code when behind enemy lines. He'd much prefer to be straightforward. But since John also knew he couldn't openly discuss this particular subject without admitting to his fraternization with Kelly, he would have to go along with Kurt's current method of addressing the issue.
"Luck has nothing to do with it," he started. "Kelly is in control of herself at all times. When you are with her, you are with her only because she has decided that you're deserving of her time and attention." The words spilled from John's mouth with unusual fluidity, and honestly he wasn't quite sure where they'd come from. "There is no way to 'win' anything from Kelly. When she makes a choice, it is hers, and hers alone. The most anyone could do is simply try their best to be worthy of her, and hope that she deems them to be so in the end."
Kurt raised his eyebrows and gave John an appraising look. Then he shook his head, letting out a soft chuckle. "I see. In that case I suppose it's a good thing that I can tell when I'm clearly outmatched." He nodded respectfully to John and smiled knowingly. "By the way," he continued, "I meant what I said after our last mission; about telling you when I feel that there's something you should know. It works both ways. So If I'm ever out of line, in the field or otherwise, you can just say the word."
"Noted," John replied. "However, it seems in this instance we've both already said everything we've needed to say to come to an accord." John looked Kurt squarely in the eye, and had no doubt that the other man caught his underlying meaning.
Kurt nodded again, "Indeed." He then put his hand on John's shoulder and gave it a brief, brotherly squeeze. "Well, I think I'll go to the shooting range for a while. I've got to try and salvage whatever self-respect I have left after that severe beating," said bemusedly as he rolled his shoulders in a half-shrug.
"Hopefully Linda isn't there. Because you'll have a hard time salvaging anything if she's doing her own target practice. Believe me, I know from experience," John added, allowing himself a small smirk.
"Good point," Kurt mused. "But at least with her I'm used to it. Remember, she was originally on my team back during training." He closed his eyes for a second as though recalling a memory, before letting out another small laugh and returning his gaze to John's. "At any rate, it is nice to have a familiar face around. It's made the transition to a new team easier."
"It's good to have you on board, Spartan," John said firmly, and after a moment's hesitation, he gave Kurt a quick salute. In spite of their personal differences, with their last mission Kurt had proved that he was going to be an asset to Blue Team. And John would not deny him the respect he afforded all his comrades.
"Thanks, Chief." Kurt gave John a sincere smile and saluted in return. "I'll see you back in the barracks later."
John inclined his head in farewell, and the two men went their separate ways; with John heading toward the hallway leading to the locker room. He was confident that he had made his own position clear. Plus Kurt's comment about "knowing when he's outmatched" was an assurance to John that the other man would no longer attempt to pursue Kelly's affections. He hoped this newfound understanding would ease what tension might have grown between Kurt and himself. And for his part, John would do better to keep in mind that they were on the same team now. As a member of Blue Team, Kurt deserved to be able to trust John completely as his leader - and as his friend.
John placed all those thoughts to the side though as he reached the door to the lockers. Choosing instead to focus on what other requirements Kelly might have come up with for him to retrieve his password while he'd been lingering.