Chapter Thirty-Six

Rolling the Blank Dice

"Hand's in the fire,
And it's keeping me warm,

Yes, all that I've ever known,

Head, underwater,
When I'm trying to be yours,
But there's something I can't control,

I'm rolling blank dice,
Blank dice no more, no more,

They're rolling eyes, blank eyes…"

Blank Dice by Flawes

Sunday December 1st, 1996

In the hallway close to the Slytherin Commons, late in the evening

Pansy could feel a light tingle pulsing in her fingertips while she continued to walk down the dark hallway. Taking a deep breath, she paused looking around her towards the sleeping paintings before blinking a few times. Lifting her left arm upwards she couldn't help but look at her sleeve button that had come undone.

'Stupid…' Pansy thought to herself as she went to slip the button back into the hole but was stopped as she saw the faint stipe of faded and jagged pink flesh. Tilting her head to her right, Pansy brough her right hand upwards to push her sleeve back so that she could see the full scar. Tracing her fingers along the mark she wondered if it would always be there or if maybe over time it would fade.

Scoffing at the thought, she yanked down her sleeve and proceeded to slip the button back into place. Lifting her wand from her pocket she lit her path before her and tucked her hair behind her left ear just when she was about to round a corner, she froze just as she heard the familiar voices speaking pointed and in hushed tones.

At first, she couldn't hear the words but knew she needed to hide. Looking to her right she waved out her light and headed towards a stone column. Once tucked behind the nook, she looked down at the half empty glass in hand.

Scrunching her brows, Pansy exhaled shakily. 'Where'd this drink come from?'

The voices picked up again into hissing whispers as she listened.

"A note?" the voice growled. "You wrote that down on a note?"

Something seemed off, she shook her head right as before an abrupt noise sounded from inside the room signaling either something fell or was kicked in a fit of anger. The sound made her jump as she rested her hand over her mouth in order to keep silent. Each motion she made seemed familiar to her.

"I'm trying to understand the logic in this," the voice continued, "It reads, 'Theo, we got the liquid luck. Is there anything else we can do to help your task with the Dark Lord?'… Honestly, are the both of you that thick?"

Every inch of her froze and her breathing stopped. 'No… There was no way he was back here in the castle. This has to be a dream.'

Theo's voice continued in a familiar tone. Everything had its place and every word had its moment.

"I'll take care of Malfoy, you two need to worry about the other thing we discussed last time, understand?" He continued talking.

Closing her eyes, other than the harsh whispers the only thing Pansy could hear was her uneven breaths which were dulled by her hand. The realization hit her… this was about that night. Halloween.

'It's a dream… You need to wake up…' she thought to herself in a hum as she felt that tingling in her finger-tips again.

Another loud sound made her jump, tightening her hand across her mouth and scrunching her eyes. Then there was a loud thudding pair of footsteps that started in her direction as well as a softer pair that seemed to echo more. Once the sounds grew loud enough, she knew they were right next to her as she pushed her back into the wall behind her.

Then the footsteps softened with distance as she held a glass in one hand while the other still lie upon her mouth. Knowing that she needed to look to her left, Pansy had about four inches of space between the column and the wall where she had perfect view of Theo looking down at a vial. Taking a step closer as she removed her hand from her mouth to take a deep breath while watching to see what he was going to do. Accidentally, she knocked her arm with the glass in hand against the stone. The sharp sting of pain shot through her arm causing her to watch in slow motion as the glass exploded.

The second it hit the floor it shattered, the piercing sound of glass breaking echoed loudly while she looked towards where Theo had been standing.

With a shaky sigh, Pansy backed out of the corner and thought to herself again. 'Wake up…'

Sighing as she looked around the corridor, she relaxed slightly taking another step backwards, only to run into something. Spinning on her heels to face what she ran into, she watched as the person reached for her wrists and whispered one word.

"It's really good to see you Pansy…" He looked her in the eyes and talked with a hushed tone. "Now, I know you listened to everything that was said just now."

Shaking her head, Pansy knew she had to find out a way to wake up. This moment was changing from that night; this moment was different…

"Please just listen this time…" he looked her in the eye as she attempted to yank her wrists away from his firm but gentle grip. "I know that you remember everything about me… But please, Pansy… Do not give up on me yet. It will all make sense with time."

"What will?" she felt herself whisper as Theo started to fade into black.

"Everything about this night…" his voice was soft, and his eyes were glistening with what looked to be truth. "Everything that I did, was for a reason."

"I don't understand… This right here, didn't happen." She shook her head again with a tight swallow. "How is this happening right now?"

"Pansy…" he huffed and looked around him as if someone were about to appear before he continued, "You need to help Malfoy with the cabinet located in the room of requirements."

"A cabinet?" she questioned before looking around them. "Theo… is this a dream?" she whispered while his grip loosened before he let go.

"Yes and no…" he sighed before he stepped even closer towards her, "I needed to talk to you… to see you."

Pansy lightly shivered closing her eyes at his touch right as he right hand moved to cup her left cheek. "You know that I never meant to hurt you that night… Don't you?"

Pansy knew that he was referring to the night he told her he took the mark. "I tired to tell you to wait before you cut me with that bit of glass…"

Opening her eyes only to meet his, Pansy looked over his face. Those lightly spotted freckles still so familiar in her mind. Sighing she watched him look around them again before she spoke.

"No. I did not know… Why do you think I lied to you about my memories of that night Theo?"

A sudden sharp sound pulled at both of their attention before Theo looked back towards her.

"I have to go now…" he whispered in an urgent tone as he proceeded to slip what felt like a bit of parchment in her hand. Then backed away from her, "Remember, help Draco…"

"Wait… Theo, I still don't understand…" she started to talk as he faded into black whips of smoke and everything surrounding them followed suit.

Monday December 2nd, 1996

Inside the Slytherin's Commons, Half past six in the morning

A cold beaded sweat coated Pansy as she sat up only to find herself inside her dormitories under her blanket. Deep and uneven breaths helped her when adjusting to her surroundings while she recalled the vivid dream. It was as if she could almost still feel the touch of his skin upon her own. With a shiver she tossed her blanked off her with her right hand as she slipped her legs to the right of her bed.

Just when she was about to brush off the dream, she felt a cold shiver down her spine followed by an uneasy feeling. Reaching for her wand with her right hand she watched as the light dimly illuminated the area. Slowly she brought her left hand towards her lap that was still clamped tightly. Opening her fingers, Pansy saw the slightly bent bit of parchment in hand that she knew had not been there before she went to sleep.

'It can't be…' she thought to herself before recalling Theo slipping her a note in the dream. With a tight swallow, Pany proceeded to place her wand beside her before pulling it open…

'Pansy… I know this may be a bit overwhelming, but I really do need your help. Draco needs your help. Tell him that I am sorry about what needed to be done and that it will take two people in reversing the damage. He may ask why and that is because that it took two people to cast the spell…. Talk soon my love, Theo…'

A shiver rand down Pany's spine as she tossed the parchment upon her bed before tearing herself away from it. 'There was a reason… for everything…' she thought as she ran her hand through her hair roughly before she started to pace around her bed. Reaching for her gown she grabbed her wand and headed for the door. One thing was for sure, she needed to talk with Draco about what the blood hell this meant.

"Are we best friends,
Are we something…."

Heartless by Childish Gambino

Monday December 2nd, 1996

In the Hallway outside of positions class, ten until Eleven in the morning

With his lips pursed in thought, Blaise tugged his leather messenger bag up in order to stop it from slipping off his shoulder. As he managed to continue walking through the halls towards Potions class he wondered if anyone other than him thought about the same things he can't seem to forget.

It wasn't until these past few days that Blaise realized that his thoughts had seemingly started to take up most of his attention these days. Said thoughts were related to the events of Halloween that transpired between what he thought to be one of his closest friends and himself. Which he came to realize that others may not have the same feelings because of that fact.

With a sigh, he looked around him and started to make his way through the crowds again. Once he made his way past the threshold of the almost empty classroom, he looked over his shoulder at the other students passing by the class and the Aurors still tucked discreetly around the corners in the halls. The sheer number of students that remained at the school with everything that happened was rather surprising to him.

Just when he was about to turn back around, he watched none other than Ginny Weasley pausing in front of the doorway wearing a smile as she started to have a chat with a somewhat familiar blonde girl. The way Ginny then adjusted her books that she hugged tightly, made him not want to look away. He also noted the way she tucked her hair behind her ear and even the way she laughed was rather captivating to him.

Sighing to himself again softly, he wondered how things would have turned out differently if he had been the one to figure out it had been Theo who was tormenting her. Would they have become friends? Would she have wanted to talk to him, or even wanted to even be seen with him? It was those thoughts that had been also something he found in his mind more than once over the past few weeks.

Blaise had come to realize during those days leading up to the events of Halloween, he had been so focused on Pansy and Draco that he hadn't been able to actually enjoy the few times he got to spend with Ginny. Now when he allowed himself to think about those moments with her, he couldn't help but wonder what might have been. Instead his thoughts always led him to the same place… Reality…

In that reality, it meant that the time they both spent together was lost to her and faded to him, almost as if it hadn't happened. With that thought, after a good moment he realized she looked in his direction and into his eyes. It wasn't until that moment had Blaise realized he had been blatantly staring. For just a second, held her gaze not wanting to look away from her.

With a sharp turn of his head feeling suddenly nervous, he then looked around towards Pansy who was sitting in her seat while she continued to stare out the window lost in her thoughts, per usual. Setting his bag down by his seat the sudden sound pulled her from her thoughts to look at him. With a raise of his brows, he sat down beside her while she pursed her lips.

"You seem to be in deep thought," he stated before reaching for his potions book inside his bag. "Anything you want to share?"

Pansy looked at him with a singular brow arched. "Not really… Have you seen or heard from Draco?"

Blaise nodded looking over his shoulder once more, just to make sure that Ginny was in fact gone from the hallway as more students entered the room. In her place thought, he then saw Draco entering the room with what looked to be an almost bounce in his step. Blaise tilted his head in confusion as he watched his blonde friend sit down.

"I had not seen him this morning, but it looks like he's here now…" he turned to look back towards her before adjusting in his seat. "Does Draco look, I don't know… almost pleased 'bout something?"

He watched Pansy looking around him towards their friend and when her brows scrunched in a similar fashion, he noted it was not just him who could see it. He wondered if something had happened to change Draco's demeanor. It was just yesterday he had saw his friend in a rather foul mood.

"You're right… he does." She answered still watching the blonde before looking back towards Blaise. Holding her confused expression for a moment, she blinked a few times before shaking her head and looking back towards Blaise.

Blaise looked towards the front of the class as professor Slughorn who was talking with a student. He then turned to look back again only to watch Granger hugging her things tightly while walking towards Draco who had suddenly stiffened in his seat. Once she sat down Blaise blinked, realizing he missed something while he watched his friend try to hide what he knew as Draco's amused smirk. From that smirk, Blaise knew just what was going on.

Turning forward Blaise brought his hand to his face in an attempt to cover his own amusement and chuckled slightly. Clearing his throat, Blaise looked at Pansy who looked at him and then back towards the two before her eyes widened.

"You don't think…" she swallowed her words before looking at Blaise and inhaled suddenly while turning her attention forwards. "They really did, didn't they…"

"You're not jealous, are you Pans?" he wondered waiting for the thought of her still pinning for Draco to sting. When it didn't, he shifted in his seat confused by his own reaction to his own question.

"I thought I might be, but honestly… no." she said with a frown.

With a nod, Blaise turned his attention towards professor Slughorn who started to go over what the last few weeks before the holidays looked like. Blaise found himself wondering about Pansy. He couldn't help but wait for what Pansy said to have some sort of effect upon him. After all, he had been pinning after her since Draco and her ended things back in fourth year. Over the past few months, he'd been there for her wanting things to be more but when it came down to it, the time had never felt right. Each time that happened, Blaise would tell himself that it was because of this or that. Not because he no longer felt things towards his dark-haired friend.

Pushing the thoughts about Pansy away he let his mind wonder again, he found himself looking towards Ron Weasley who was whispering something in a blonde girl's ear, which made her giggle a bit. Blaise then wondered what the Weasley had said to the girl. Rolling his eyes, he let his mind wonder back to another redhead who sat there still tugging in the back of his mind with her hazel eyes.

'Wonder how she's doing…' Blaise thought to himself before adjusting once more in his seat. 'Why'd she stare at me as if she could remember something… It doesn't seem like she remembers anything… but I could be wrong…'

With that thought, he reached inside his bag for a bare bit of parchment and proceeded to grab his quill. Quickly scratching down his note that read…

'After class, do you think you could do me a favor?"

Blaise passed the note over towards Pansy without looking in her direction. After a moment or two he looked around the room catching another quick glance towards Granger and Malfoy. He needed to talk with her and find out about Ginny. The small bit of parchment slid back in front of him as he looked up at Slughorn who was now explaining how the final worked this week. Looking down at the note it read…

'Depends…'

Blaise reached for his quill once more and continued to write.

'I need to give Granger something without Potter or Weasley noticing … Do you think you could distract them just for a moment so I can hand her the note?'

Blaise folded the parchment and slid it back towards his friend once more before looking at Potter who was messing with his glasses. The note was in front of him once more.

'And how do you know they will try to talk with her, and she won't stay with Draco?'

Blaise tilted his head and then responded.

'She came in alone. She always leaves class with those two… Probably because they don't share the class beforehand… Besides, Draco always leaves this class by himself. Please…'

Once he handed her the note, he then watched her look up towards him with her brows raised which he proceeded to do the same. Watching his friend roll her eyes she then responded before passing the parchment back to him.

'Fine… How do you propose I "distract" those two? Also, where does Draco go after class? I need to talk to him.'

Blaise couldn't stop the small smirk before he scratched a reply.

'If you're nice, I'm sure the action alone would be plenty in order to confuse the shite out of 'em… As for Draco, usually the tower to get a bit of alone time to think.'

He also did not stop himself from chuckling as he passed the note back. After a moment, he felt her shoe connect with his foot abruptly in a kicking motion before the note was tossed before him with only one new word.

'Dick…'

Laughing again softly, he pointed his finger at the parchment he watched as it shredded itself and quietly float towards a bin on the other side of the desk. For the rest of class, Blaise attempted to turn his attention back towards the professor but not without a certain redhead staying in his thoughts.

"Oh damn, oh damn, oh damn,
I'm so perplexed,
With just one breath,
I'm locked in,

Oh damn, oh damn, oh damn,
That it's almost shocking,

I know, I know you're scared,
Your heart, your mind,
Your soul, your body,

They won't, they won't,
They won't be careful,

But I guess you don't know me,
Cause if I want you,
Then I want you, babe,

Cause space was just a word made up,
By someone who's afraid to get too,

Close…."

Close by Nick Jonas and Tove Lo

Monday December 2nd, 1996

In the Hallway outside of positions class, ten until Eleven in the morning

Dread and excitement… Those were the emotions that spurred Hermione to turn and pivot around the other students who were making their ways towards their classes. At this point in time, she was contemplating if she should even attend potions class or call it day of reading and resting. Sounded rather pleasant to her… after all she was still feeling rather sore and almost certain she had a bruise upon her backside.

Taking a deep breath, she paused just outside of the classroom only to see Ginny talking with Luna. It was now or never that she had to decide if she should make an appearance. Maybe she could take some time in the library to study for all the finals that were coming up within the next two weeks…

"Bye Ginny… Oh hey Hermione." Luna called as she looked towards Hermione with a smile. "See you both at lunch."

With a smile, Hermione waved Luna goodbye while Ginny proceeded to have a look inside the potion's classroom for a moment. Hermione then made her way beside her redheaded friend who was still looking at something while Hermione contemplated if she should make a run for the library. Sighing at the thought she turned her attention back towards Ginny, as she continued to fixate upon something or someone inside the classroom. The action left Hermione rather confused as she looked inside only to see Hannah Abbot and Blaise Zabini walking to their seats.

"Have you ever spoken with Blaise before?" Ginny wondered peeling her attention away and towards her older friend.

Hermione shook her head while her expression pinched slightly. "No, can't say that we have had many interactions over the years. Why?"

Ginny shrugged. "No reason really, just curious."

Sighing, Hermione looked towards the classroom once more just in time to see none other than Malfoy walking past her inside and towards their seats. When her and Ginny made eye contact, the redhead shook her head.

"Oh no you don't… Remember what you said, no shame. Get in there. Class is about to start." Ginny began to pushed Hermione towards the door. Right as the bell chimed, Hermione made her way towards her seat reluctantly.

Setting her things down, without looking in his direction, Hermione pulled out her chair and went to sit down. With a very subtle wince, without being obvious she looked to her right only to see a smirk plaster on Malfoy's face. She wanted to hex the smug look off his face as she felt her cheeks begin to burn realizing that they both knew the reason for her wince of soreness.

Over the past twenty-four hours, Hermione kept telling herself that there were only two explanations that could explain the events that transpired between her and Malfoy on Saturday evening.

Explanation number one… The so called 'treat', which Malfoy knew nothing about, spurred her to act irrationally and illogically. Therefore, she needed to just explain that was the full truth of it, even if she had been having those kinds of thoughts about him since the library. However, at this point in time, she just hoped that he would not inquire further.

Explanation number two… That 'treat' was her excuse not her reason, to feel okay about wanting and following through with shagging Malfoy in the room of requirements. Which, if this explanation were the case, then that does go along the lines of not feeling shame when admitting she was attracted to the stupid git. Again, she just hoped he wouldn't ask…

"Are you doing alright over there, Granger?" His smug sounding voice proceeded to quietly but effectively interrupt her thoughts. Showing the git, a quick pointed look, Hermione learned back in her chair.

"Quite fine, thank you." She whispered back.

"You sure about that?" she could feel his burning question ghosting beside her right cheek causing her to shiver with memories of said events that transpired between the two. "If that sound you made is any indication, you seem to be a bit sore from your weekend activities. Maybe I could help out a bit…"

Hermione couldn't help but bite her bottom lip in embarrassment as Malfoy proceeded to find amusement in her reaction. Contrary to what it came across, she would have preferred if she had been able to not react to his words.

"Shove off Malfoy… You have done enough…" she murmured as she proceeded to look her book before closing it and examining the room around them.

Looking towards his eyes for the first time since they left each other that night she watched his expression change. She noted that she had successfully managed to change the subject. It was his turn to show a bit of something other than poking fun at her.

"I can assure you Granger," he paused as he murmured under his breath, "I have plenty more I can do to help your, uh, situation."

The words made her face burn while she searched for his eyes. When he met her eyes and he looked towards her, it felt as if it were just him and her in the room. Her stomach did flops and all the feelings she'd been attempting to shove down over time had surfaced. All it took was his words and his unwavering attention.

'Oh no…' Hermione thought to herself as she swallowed thickly trying to find words. The English language seemed to have left her vocabulary in that moment.

"I have no desire to find out just what you're on about Malfoy…" She whispered back and he nodded breaking their prolonged eye contact. Had she not spent the past three months getting to know him, she would have missed the small tick of satisfaction that momentarily pulled at the corner of his mouth.

'He cares…' she thought to herself.

Looking away from him she smiled softly before turning her attention back towards professor Slughorn as he explained how the two finals would work followed by mentioning the Holiday Slughorn party.

The clock began signaling the end of class while Hermione attempted to tuck some of her loose curls that were falling from her bun behind her ear. When they fell forward once more, she looked to see Malfoy. Unexpectedly, he then reached over and properly tucked her hair behind her ear so that it wouldn't fall. Once he was satisfied with his action he slowly and momentarily brushed his pointed finger along her jaw before dropping his hand altogether.

The act itself made Hermione's stomach flop let alone the fact he looked her over while he did so. Clearing his throat, he gave a sharp lift of his brows before he collected his things.

"I hear stretching helps with soreness…" he spoke lowly with a smirk. "Just a thought. Might even find a book that might be useful on the subject."

Hermione felt her cheeks burn yet again and knew that the butterflies she felt were trouble. Once he left the classroom, she relaxed a little. In her mind, she knew it had to be trouble as she replayed his words from Saturday night in her head.

'I agreed no games… There was nothing in that statement that said we had to share our feelings with each other.'

Hermione sighed as she began to look for Harry and Ron while attempting to push away her confusion. Just when she spotted the two walking towards her, she watched as Pansy Parkinson stopped in front of them to their confusion. Tilting her head, Hermione attempted to watch what was happening when someone stepped in her view. Looking up she saw Blaise Zabini peering down at her with what seemed to an eagerness. She watched him reach down for something on the ground before looking back towards her.

"I think you dropped something Granger…" he spoke handing her a folded bit of parchment. Just when Hermione looked back and forth between the parchment and him, she started to shake her head no when he nodded yes. It was meant for her…

'A note from Blaise…' Hermione thought to herself as she proceeded to take the note in hand. When she took the note, she nodded.

"Thank you. I hadn't realized I had dropped it." She proceeded to slip the note into her pocket before he nodded once more.

"You're welcome." He said and then started towards the door. Once she looked back towards Harry and Ron, she was instantly met with an arched brow from Pansy who walked past without a word.

Seems to her that Blaise wanted to get a note to her without Harry or Ron knowing about it for some reason. Looking over her shoulder towards the two Slytherin's that proceeded to walk into the bustling hallway, she heard Harry speaking.

"Any idea why Parkinson would ask?" Hermione turned her attention back towards her Harry who spoke while Ron's eyes bugged, and he shook his head.

"No idea." He then made eye contact with Hermione. "Honestly, that was probably the weirdest thing she's said before."

"What might that be?" Hermione wondered while the three of them made their way out the door.

"Well, I think it might've been a compliment Ron." Harry said while pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "She smiled and said that she was impressed by Ron's Quidditch abilities. Then said asked if it came to him naturally or if he had to practice a ton."

"It was weird…" Ron added as they made their way down the hallway. Hermione snorted and couldn't help but wonder what it was all about before he added, "Made me feel really weird."

"I'm a bit disappointed I missed hearing those words from her." She responded with a chuckle and then shook her head at the absurd idea Parkinson used polite conversation as a distraction. "Well, I am off to the library. See the both of you at lunch."

"See you later 'Mione." Harry said just as she made her way up a set of stairs and around a corner. Once out of sight she silently hoped Blaise had not charmed the darn note.

'What was it with Slytherin's slipping me notes anyways… 'she thought to herself as she reached into her pocket and pulled out the note.

'Hermione, I know that this is out of nowhere and that we normally do not talk. I was hoping that you would be willing to meet me in the library. I did not think that after class was the best time to talk. I will be there waiting after potions class until the end of lunch at 1:30 this afternoon. If you do not wish to talk, I understand your hesitation, but hope you will reconsider. Regards, Blaise…'

With a pointed confused look, Hermione looked across the hall towards a clock. Looks like Blaise would be headed there in the next fifteen minutes or so. The question was what in the world could he want to talk about with her.

'Only one way to find out…' she thought to herself as she headed down the hall and towards the library.

Hello! Back again with an update! Favorite, review, and follow! Very excited to see everyone's thoughts about the chapter and the shocking bit in the beginning!

Thanks and looking forward to reading about reactions!

~ Madison