Author's Note: I'm happy that Precious Secrets was so well received! Thank you, snk fandom! :3

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the official Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan characters.

Forever is Never for Certain

Chapter One

"Cleaning up again, Petra?"

Lost in her thoughts, Petra Ral jumped slightly, barely balancing the stack of dishes she was clearing from her squad's table. Turning to meet the bright face of Hanji Zoe, she laughed.

"Yeah. They're like little boys when they get excited," she replied, adding a tin cup to the top of the pile.

Hanji sighed, dropping herself into a chair, "Men are so messy, aren't they Petra?"

At this, the honey haired girl pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow. "You're the messiest of all, Hanji."

Pounding her fists on the table, Hanji let out a belt of laughter, leaning back in her chair. "Oooh, you've found me out!" She relaxed then, her eyes softening at her friend's efforts. "But I bet Levi appreciates this."

Though Petra's cheeks pinked, she brushed it off. "Heichou is so busy, he needn't be bothered by things like this. I don't mind doing it."

It was fair to say that all of Squad Levi knew how Petra felt about the strange and hard to approach corporal. It was also fair to say that they all knew he reciprocated her sentiments. It was only Hanji, however, that had discovered their deep emotional connection had crossed over into physical affection.

Still, no matter how much anyone knew, no party privy to the information ever made such knowledge public, though select few would rise to vague teasing, the female squad leader in particular.

Petra let out a little cough, shaking her head and leaving to deposit the dishes in the kitchen where some new recruits would take care of them.

On her way back to her room, she felt a wave of lightheadedness hit her and she pressed a hand to the cool stone of their headquarter's wall to steady herself. She hadn't eaten much at dinner, she recalled. That had been a mistake, she now realized, but then she hadn't expected it to affect her so soon. She simply hadn't been all that hungry.

It didn't matter, she decided, regaining her equilibrium and continuing on. It wasn't like she was particularly hungry now, and after all the training they'd been doing recently preparing for the next day's mission, her body would be struggling to keep up.

Naturally.

At the landing of the stairs, she thought for a moment and instead of turning right towards her room, she moved left, in the direction of Levi's office. It would really be best not to disappear on him.

He admitted her as soon as she knocked and she entered smiling, as she always did.

"How are you, Heichou?" she asked, clasping her hands behind her back.

"The same as when we parted an hour ago," he muttered, "busy and annoyed."

His answer rarely changed and she stifled a giggle. "I'd like to request permission to retire for the night," she said, her words factual and impersonal, the request of a soldier.

"I don't see how you need my permission for that, Petra," he said, throwing her an irritated glance that she didn't take personally.

"It's just that it's early," she pressed, her tone softening, her position melting away as she let herself become his lover behind these closed doors, "and I distinctly recall you once telling me to—" she furrowed her brows and dropped her voice an octave, imitating him "—never forget your fucking tea."

The pen in Levi's hand scratched across the parchment. That had been over a year ago. She still remembered? He thought her bringing him tea every night had become habit, not because she was dedicated to doing so out of his request. Still, it pleased him, even if her flippant use of his foul language didn't.

"If you're tired, sleep," he clipped, "I'll visit you later."

"I'll probably be snoring," she teased.

"Then I'll plug your nose so you stop," came his absent reply as he went about fixing the paperwork he had damaged.

Petra smiled at this, but before she could take her leave, he cut her off.

"Are you alright?" He was staring at her.

She blinked. "Should I not be?"

Levi frowned. She seemed pale to him. Perhaps it was the dim light, or his eyes were going bad. Or perhaps he was just completely spent.

"Nevermind," he muttered, "goodnight Petra."

She bade him a good night in return, and made her way to her room.

xxxx

It was late when Levi left his office, much later than he had intended. As he said he would, and as he always did, he stopped at Petra's door. There was light coming out from underneath and he rapped his knuckles against the wood.

"Petra."

She didn't reply, not that he had particularly expected her to, and he let himself in. She was asleep at the desk, halfway through penning a letter, candle burned nearly to its death.

Careless girl, he thought to himself, though more out of affection than annoyance.

She had already dressed herself for bed, which Levi was thankful for when he lifted her from the wooden chair. What a pain it would be to undress her while she slept. She slept like, well, a rock. He was almost certain that was how she got her name.

He nudged the covers back, laid her down, and then pulled her quilt up to her shoulders. It was an old thing, but she had brought it with her as a recruit, and rarely traveled overnight without it. He wondered just who it was that had made it. A mother? Grandmother? Regardless, it was a comfort to her, and he was always careful around it.

He sat on her bed, watching her for a moment before he put the backs of his fingers against her forehead. She really did look pale. Still, she wasn't overly warm so he chalked it up to exactly what had him bolting the door and shedding his uniform in her room instead of climbing upstairs to his own: exhaustion.

Shrugging off his shirt and discarding his white trousers with an impatient kick, the corporal slipped beneath the quilt, and kissed her forehead, letting his lips linger against her skin for a moment. He slid an arm over the top of her head, tucking her into the crook of his neck, and fell asleep.

Morning came too quickly for Levi and when the sun poked through the sheer curtain and onto his face, he groaned. One of these days he'd be able to sleep in.

Pulling his arm out from underneath Petra's sleeping form, he sighed. All this sneaking around was tiresome. Someday he'd make her his wife and he wouldn't have to return to his own bed come sun up.

"No. . ."

Propped up on his elbows, Levi glanced down at his auburn haired beauty, beginning to wake. He cursed inwardly. He hadn't meant to disturb her.

"Don't leave," she whispered, cracking open one eye and scooting over to hug his waist. She lifted herself up, yawned, and settled against his chest. It was warm, inviting, and everything she looked forward to at the end of each day.

"Perhaps if you hadn't been so sleepy last night you'd have been able to enjoy my company," he told her, his voice tinged with soft humor as he reached for her hips, pulling her up to straddle his own.

Petra opened her eyes and pouted, sitting up and tracing shapes on his bare skin. "You work me too hard."

Levi's mouth flicked up into a wicked grin and his eyes became hungry as he ran his calloused hands up her body. "I'll bet."

Laughing, she rolled off of him, flipping herself to lay on her stomach, and gave his arm a small punch. "That's not what I meant."

"That's a shame."

She didn't reply to this, watching him as he gathered up his things, soaking in the sunlight of the early morning. Petra didn't mind being up at this hour; she had always been fond of the hours before anyone else was awake. It would be a while still before either her squad or the others rose, giving her time to bathe in peace before she'd rouse Levi from the nap he was bound to take, pick out his clothes, then brew his morning coffee.

That was how it was most every day, and she was happy for it.

After breakfast, those recruited for the day's mission readied the horses and they set off outside the wall. Today would be simple, clearing out a small town of the titans that had gathered there. It seemed like backwards progress, as they'd already rid that place of them before, but Petra wasn't bothered by it. No matter how well one cleared a field, weeds were inevitably going to grow at some point.

It was a cleanup mission, not much more, and then they'd be able to plow ahead clearing their pathway.

"Hey Petra, you look like shit."

If there was one voice she was not in the mood for today, it was Auruo's. There was a light dizziness around her thoughts that she still couldn't shake and a strange feeling in her throat that wasn't quite nausea, but didn't seem to want to disappear either.

"I'm fine, Auruo," she clipped with a sigh, holding her horse's reins. Though she tried to show her annoyance through her tight grip, her fingers resisted.

"Yeah well," he sidled his horse up closer, "you look like you're about to fall off."

Whipping her head to face him head on with her disapproving scowl, she found herself met with concern. He wasn't poking fun at her today. Did she really appear that unwell?

"I'm fine," she repeated, "just a little tired."

Auruo shrugged. "You haven't been eating. A man doesn't like it when a woman can't take care of herself."

Annoyed, she raised her arm to swat at him, but he cast her a warning glance and pulled his steed out of her reach. In front of them, Levi listened to the exchange. It wasn't often that he intentionally eavesdropped, but someone else had noticed her pallor and that was something he couldn't ignore.

Petra let out an irritated huff, focusing ahead. They were almost at their destination. She needed to ready her mind for battle. Personal skirmishes could wait.

Levi dictated formations and assignments once they reached the town, taking Petra to the North end with him. It'd be easier to keep an eye on her this way. She likely wouldn't think much of it; they often worked this way together and with her ability to synch to his movements, they'd be through with this mission rather quickly.

One titan, two titans. Petra's movements were as fluid as always, a fierce determination in her eyes as she cut them down. She darted the spray of blood, she nodded at him in affirmation. Everything was normal.

"Left," he ordered.

"Roger that!" she replied as she always did, following his lead.

There were three titans near the clock tower, all around seven meters, and none of them looking to be very quick or agile. Levi adjusted his ears to listen behind him. From the sound of it, things were going well. The sooner they could leave, the better.

"I've got this one, Heichou!"

Levi nodded, splitting from her and with two swift movements, dispatched of a pair of beasts. His boots hit the shingles with a soft 'thud' and he frowned at the blood on his blades, and his hands. Sighing slightly, he lifted his head. Petra should be finishing by now.

Her mouth was set in a firm line as her wire pierced the titan and she pulled her body back, releasing the wire, preparing to emulate the spinning attack he most frequently used. She was getting remarkably good at it, he noted to himself.

And then it happened.

Her fingers gave up their grip, releasing her blades and not a second later, her body followed suit, falling completely limp, midair. Petra felt herself drop, she felt the weight of her weapons as they pulled her down, she felt the hot ceramic tiles assaulting her face as her body smashed against the rooftop, and she felt the cooler cement tower that stopped her from rolling off the building entirely.

And then, she felt nothing at all.

Levi cursed aloud and launched himself forward, not wasting a moment slaying the titan that was incredibly interested in the small female up on the roof.

"Petra!"

With her gear, her body was heavy and he pulled her away from the building's edge as well as the gravity that tempted her to fall.

"Petra," he repeated, his voice softer as he propped her up against his bended knee, using one arm to support her head and the other to wipe the blood from her face. When she didn't respond, he slapped her cheek lightly, then gave her shoulder a small shake.

"For fuck's sake, Petra!" he snapped, checking her pulse, "wake up!"

She groaned at this and he sighed, sitting back when she opened her eyes. "Oh thank fuck."

"H-Heichou—"

Still supporting her, Levi looked down at her, his relief pushed down as he frowned at her.

"What happened."

Petra placed one hand on the shingles, trying to push herself up to a stand, "I don't know," she replied honestly, "the heat?"

Levi had never seen Summer heat render a person unconscious midair.

"Stay here," he told her, rising to his feet. "and don't move from this spot unless your life is in danger."

"What."

He flicked his gaze to her. "That's an order."

He left with nothing else and balling her hands into weak fists, Petra slumped against the cement wall, pulling her knees up and resting her eyes. What was happening to her?

A tickle rose up in her throat and she winced. Her whole body hurt from the fall, her chest in particular. Or had she had that pain all day? Suddenly she couldn't remember. Giving in to the feeling, she covered her mouth and coughed. And coughed, and coughed, and coughed. The pressure in her chest tightened and when she found herself in desperate need for air, she was unable to obtain it.

Tears pricked at her eyes, blurring her vision and she let herself fall forward, palms set firmly on the rooftop, not caring a whit for politeness or grace while she coughed, trying to force up whatever was inside of her, then wheezing when she grasped for air to refill her lungs.

And then she could taste it. It was thick, warm, and metallic. It erupted from the back of her throat, coating her tongue and dripping from her mouth, splashing the backs of her hands, mixing with the tears that were falling from her eyes, squeezed shut from the pain.

Blood.

With a couple more forceful heaves, she managed to get out what she assumed to be most of the mucus that had been stuck inside of her, and collapsed onto the tiles, exhausted.

How hard did I fall, she wondered. She'd been hit hard enough to cough up blood before but never like this. Then it was instant, a simple and immediate effect of a hard blow.

Perhaps she was working too hard. That could be it. That had to be it.

On trembling legs she stood, reaching inside her pocket for a handkerchief. She cleaned herself up, wiped her tears, and steadied herself against the side of the clock tower. Her comrades were just about through. They'd be leaving soon.

Pulling her blades up from where they hung over the roof, she sheathed them and cleared her throat. She was feeling better. There was no need for her to sit around like an invalid when she was more than capable of rejoining the squad herself.

While she had never deliberately disobeyed Levi outside of their private lives, it would be a waste of his time to travel all this way just to retrieve her so, knowing she'd be able to gain his forgiveness tonight, she set off at a jog towards the southern side of the town.

Her equilibrium left her, sending her head spinning and she stopped, taking deep breaths to regain her composure, and continued on at a much slower pace.

Calm down, Petra. Just take it easy.

By the time she joined her peers, the town was cleared and their mission was a success. There had been few casualties and her friends were cheering in celebration. It was a rare victory for the Scout Regiment.

Levi's jaw tightened when he saw her and she could see in his steely gaze that he was displeased, but he didn't make a show of it. Instead, he ignored her. She sighed at this. It was much easier to maneuver his emotions when he was being cutting and rude.

He didn't speak to her at dinner, but then, he wasn't even present at dinner. She assumed he was busy with paperwork, or perhaps he was using that as a reason to avoid her. She wouldn't put it past him. He was incredibly petulant this way.

"Hey, hey."

Pulled from her thoughts by Erd, Petra let out a small sigh, and by the look on her comrade's face, she'd been doing an awful lot of it here at the table.

"You should eat," he pressed gently, tearing off a piece of her bread and handing it to her, "and don't worry about the corporal. He's probably just being thickheaded."

Though she appreciated the blonde's words of comfort, once again she had no desire to eat. She took a bite to be polite, but it didn't feel right in her mouth and she forced it down with half a smile.

"We're worried about you," Gunther chipped in, his brows furrowed with concern. "Fainting in the face of a titan. . .Petra that isn't like you at all."

She stood, pushing her dinner away from her. "I haven't been myself lately," she admitted, "and I'm sorry."

From the other end of the table, Auruo grinned and leaned forward. "Maybe you're knocked up."

The other three squad members froze. No one had ever been so vocal about the relationship between Petra and the corporal before. Erd and Gunther shot distasteful looks at the weathered man and Petra inhaled sharply, staring down at Auruo, her left eye on the verge of twitching.

"Tongues that wag will eventually be bitten off," she warned, her voice a dead cold steel.

He sat back, lowering his eyes and his lips in an impression of Levi. "You'd better shape up then, if you want to keep up with the rest of us."

Not bothering to dignify the words with a response, she turned her back on him and swept from the room.

Levi found her in the hallway.

He took her by surprise, the way he moved so quickly, shoving her up against the wall by her shoulder, his face set in a deep glower.

"Levi!" she cried out in protest, all proprieties forgotten.

"What the Hell is wrong with you?" he demanded, pushing her back to the stone each time she moved forward.

Unappreciative of the sudden assault, Petra shoved him away with a hand on his face. "What's wrong with you?" she countered. He wasn't playing with her. He was furious.

Gritting his teeth, Levi caught both of her wrists, holding them above her head while he pinned her body to the wall with his own. Screw being seen.

Petra swallowed, afraid to move. He was breathing heavily and it terrified her. She'd never seen him as anything but composed, even in his anger. She was quivering; there was no doubt he could feel her shaking, but after a few moments of absolute silence, the vice grip he held on her arms loosened and his free hand reached behind her neck, pulling her softly against him.

"You scared me," he breathed into her ear, dropping her wrists and pulling her closer, using both of his arms to keep her connected to him. "I've never been so frightened."

"I'm fine," she told him, running her fingers through his hair affectionately, soothingly, as she often did when he had trouble sleeping. "I'm fine."

He kissed her pulse and smiled to himself when he felt her weaken in his arms. "I'd like to see you in my office," he murmured

"Right now?" she asked, her voice losing its firm edge, and drifting off into a whimper as he gave her skin a small affectionate nip.

"I'm afraid it can't wait," he replied.

She smiled and pulled away. "Lead the way, Heichou."

Their walk was silent and Levi took the time to observe her from the corner of his eye. Nothing seemed amiss. Her colour was returning slightly and she showed none of the signs of weakness that she had displayed earlier in the day. She'd had more than enough strength to resist him, but something still wasn't sitting right with him.

Inside his office, he made quick work of bolting the door and shedding his jacket. With his hands on the backs of her thighs, he lifted her up and onto his desk. She hadn't expected him to move so quickly and she placed her hands on his shoulders for support.

"Levi. . ."

Standing between her legs, he pulled her close, then cupped her face, kissing her fiercely. He still wasn't quite forgiving of her disobedience, but he had been so certain her fall had killed her, he couldn't help but be thankful that she was still here with him. He whispered her name over and over again between kisses and his hands wandered down her body, settling on her hips and jerking her forward against his groin.

Her fingers clenched as she was reminded of his desire for her. She gripped his shoulders, her fingernails digging into his skin through the linen of his shirt, unable to decide whether she wanted to kiss him back, or let her head fall back and openly accept his passion.

"It's been too long," he muttered, snaking a hand between them, expertly unbuttoning her blouse. Two days. It had been two days since he'd properly had her in his arms.

"I'm sorry," she breathed, "I was tired."

But Levi didn't want to hear excuses. He didn't want to hear much of anything that wasn't his own name moaned in the hushed ecstasy that she had perfected. Despite his own wishes, he knew he wouldn't hear it tonight.

Sure enough, her hold on him grew weaker. He leaned forward, an arm behind her back preventing her from falling onto the desk when, just as he predicted, her fingers lost their strength and her arms fell to her side.

He hadn't done much aside from kissing her, yet she was sweating, panting, and trembling—none of it out of pleasure.

He closed his eyes, stepping away and giving her space, but helping her sit up nonetheless.

"Just as I thought."

Petra coughed, barely covering her mouth in time; her arm felt heavier than usual and her movements were slow. Why now?

"I'm sorry; I probably should have eaten more."

Pulling a chair over, Levi lifted her into it, setting her down. "You aren't well."

"I'm fine," she pressed, though the way she nearly swooned where she sat betrayed her.

Mouth set in a firm line, he stared down at her. "Don't lie to me, Petra."

She had nothing to say, disappointed in herself for being unable to keep up with the squad, with him, and with her own desires.

"You're taking leave."

The words pierced her and she sat, rigid. "No."

He raised a brow. "Yes. You're off active duty for the next week, or until I determine you are well enough to complete the tasks assigned to you."

"You can't do that, Levi!" she cried, pounding her fist on the arm of the chair with more force than either of them thought she'd be able to muster.

He blinked slowly. "I already have. The paperwork has already been submitted. Your suspension is in place as of tomorrow."

Her chest tightened and she struggled for air. Betrayal rose up in her features and keeping silent was all Levi could do to refrain from reversing his decree. He didn't want to do this to her, or to any member of his Special Operations Corps, but it was for her own good.

"Why?" she demanded, "why would you do this to me!"

Crouching before her, Levi lifted a hand, wiping away the tears that were falling down her face. He'd stung her pride, but where she had vowed to serve him, he in turn had a duty to protect his brats.

"I am both your corporal and your lover," he stated. "As your superior, I can not have an unfit soldier."

He softened his features then, taking her left hand in both of his and kissing her knuckles. "And as your lover, I don't have the heart to put you in any more danger than I already do."

Petra pressed the heel of her free hand to her forehead. He was right, as badly as she didn't want to admit it. It wasn't safe for her to be fighting in this condition. Today had been proof enough of that.

"Additionally," he whispered, giving a small massage to her bare ring finger, "I can not do my job properly if I have to worry about you."

She nodded and he stood, kissing her forehead.

"It's only a week, Petra. You could take this time to visit your father."

"I'd rather stay here with you," she said, lifting the corner of her mouth, "if that's alright."

He confirmed this with a small nod and she straightened, buttoning up her blouse and patting the wrinkles from her jacket. With a motherly sort of smile, she retrieved his from its place on the floor, remembering how often her own uniform joined it. She'd have to get well quickly.

"I'll see you in bed," he told her, his words gently dismissive. She understood the subtle command and left without another word.

Pushing his hands through his hair, Levi let out an annoyed breath of air though his nose. She was a stubborn girl and it had almost gotten her killed.

He had almost lost her.

With his knuckles against his mouth, he sent up a prayer of thanks to whatever deity might be listening, and then cursed them. There was a feeling in his gut that told him a week was not going to be enough. Forever might not be enough.

Emotionally drained, he flung open the door and stormed down the halls in search of Hanji. She was obnoxious and full of shit, but damn it all to Hell she was the closest friend he had and at that moment, a friend was exactly what he needed.

xxxx

Author's Notes: Soooo yeah I decided to delve into Rivetra Multi-chapter, but I'll warn you that I'm not very good with fluff and anyone who isn't familiar with my style of storytelling might find themselves disappointed in the outcome =P

Thanks for reading!