"Visco, where did you go? Tell your master if you're going for a walk, damn you..."
What a way to start! Oh my, this must be very confusing for all you uninitiated guests!
... Well, to quickly recap everything I am aware of (and skipping the boring details of everything preceding this fine moment), dearest Master Lia has been worried sick... I mean, infuriated over her 'prisoner,' the lovely Master Viscole, suddenly walking out one fine dreary morning. Yes, a prisoner, able to pack her bags and head out into the great unknown with nary a word. That's the handiwork of the Lia we all know and love!
Now, lacking the initiative to take action- I mean, unable to travel to areas lacking a proper swamp, the 'hero' of this tale could only think to sit outside and deal with her debilitating migraine, absorbing as much noxious swamp gas as she could. Life could be simple.
However... Well, she wouldn't remain... er, angry for long, you see. Contrived... contrivances make everything interesting.
"Metallia!" A familiar voice shouted across the noxious gassy air, reaching the Swamp Witch's ears as she sat nursing her rampant headache on her house's porch. That voice... could it possibly be?
"No way..." The scantily clad girl squinted her eyes towards the bridge leading to the disgusting, non-yet-swamp-filled outside world, and caught sight of her runaway slave... I mean, assistant. "H-Huh? V-Visco?"
Indeed, the Inquisitor who was cursed to have the appearance of a dog-human hybrid had come sprinting like mad up to Master Lia's door. She stopped just a few short steps away from the large hat-wearing girl, grasping her knees and panting in an attempt to reclaim her lost breaths. "Phuh... Phuh... S-Sorry I took so long, M-Metallia... but I was looking for something!"
A strange look overcame Master Lia; it started off almost like a look of relief, if you can believe a laughable image such as that, but quickly morphed into a face quite befitting of a pouting child. "Looking for something...? Grr... you mangy mutt! What the hell were you thinking, running off like that!? M-My servants have no right to simply pack up and le-"
"Here, Metallia... A-And I'm sorry, but I needed this to be a surprise!" The dog princess held out a rather peculiar rarity in the swamp: a collection of fluorescent red roses. Why, what is this? Our dear witch could barely remember ever laying one glance on a sight quite as superb, beautiful, wondrous, whimsical, and all those other overused adjectives.
And perhaps Master Lia failed to realize that she wasn't using those terms to just describe the glowing flowers.
Understandably, the witch, not being accustomed to showing any emotion other than unbridled rage, was at a loss for words. "Flo-Flo... Flowers? T-The hell?" Her sharp eyes tried to glare at Viscole (a common occurrence, believe me), but she found it hard to meet her gaze. "... Why?"
"Huh? Well..." Master Viscole drifted off for but a moment, perhaps collecting her own set of conflicted thoughts. "... Because... I wanted to thank you, Metallia. Yes, you're a mean witch, and always act like a complete jerk... but you have given me hospitality, a-and my honor code dictates that I must always show proper thanks, even to villains!" Another instance of awkward silence, do forgive these two. It's like watching two stubborn rocks trying to share the dirt, yes... "... So, thanks, M-Metallia... And, I hope that we can be... I dunno, friends?"
The swamp witch was still most flabbergasted, but she didn't let that stay her tongue for long. "... F-Friends?... I-I don't need any freakin' friends, dammit! In fact, I don't need any damn flowers! And hospitality? Hah! Don't flatter yourself; you're my pet. A mangy mutt I pulled in from the mud!" Ah, how eloquent! I am always left speechless at her marvelous use of words.
The dog princess could only clench her fists and puff out her cheeks. "Why you! I tried to be friendly, and this is how you react? Fine, nevermind then! You ARE just a stinking witch! I'd never be friends with someone like you!" The poor girl turned, whispering beneath her breath "... Maybe I should leave..." Oh dear.
Usually at times like these, dear Lia would continue her haughty act and simply goad her lackey even further. However, a twinge of something on this day prevented her from doing just that. Perhaps allergens from the fluorescent roses. Whatever the case may be, seeing the back of the pouting dog-girl's head left an empty feeling in the pit of this witch's stomach. No, nothing like Lord Peptobis.
Against even her own wishes, she spoke. "... Hey, Visco... Grr, come back... Lemme see those roses again."
"Why? So you can eat them? Kill them?!"
"Just do it, okay?" Reluctantly, Viscole Dotrish eyed Metallia as she walked right up to her face. The violent- I mean, sociable witch took the bundle of roses with a grace most unbefitting of her, as if they were tiny crates of highly volatile nitrogen. Ah, what a thought indeed...
"... It took awhile to find these, alright? I didn't even know roses grew near swamps, but after all we've seen, I figure anything is possible," Lady Visco remarked, unsure what her 'master' was thinking as she held the rare delicate plants.
Master Lia's eyes finally lifted back to the girl, and with a light grimace, she picked out one flower, the longest of the bunch. "I don't need any flowers..." With little warning, the witch aimed the stem towards the Inquisitor's hair, and stuck it gently next to the 'canine's' ear, taking the utmost care to avoid the thorns. "... since they look better on you, anyways."
Viscole's eyes were wide, understandably of course. "M-Metallia...?"
"... Move in closer, alright... I... I'm gonna say something that I never, ever have before... a-and never again, so if you miss it, yer screwed... G-Got it, ya dog?"
What else could she do but go along for the ride? "O-Oh, a-alright Metallia..." The honorable Inquisitor leaned in her head, fully expecting to hear a glorious once-in-a-lifetime message that would leave even a prophet in awe... so when a set of soft lips pressed against hers, her mind was slow in adapting to the situation at hand. Just what was happening? It had to be a dream, surely?
A long minute passed, and Master Lia eventually broke the unusual union. With a face redder than the roses (probably because of trite lines like that), her sharp eyes gazed into the dog's, a welcoming look of uncertainty prevalent.
"... Thank you, Visco..."
My oh my, just what is this? Master Lia sure has changed over these long, long, long, longlonglonglonglong years. Yes...
The two unlikely companions eyed each other, completely nothing like two starving wolves preparing for war. No, this stare was wholly unlike anything the two 'innocent' women had ever shared before even, with anyone or anything.
"Metallia..." Hmm... how is one expected to recite poetic lines about two women of class staring at each other for a long period of time? There is always the possibility of bringing in nature... Why, this poisonous swamp gas mixed in with the damp, bleak surroundings is certainly the most romantic scene to describe.
"... -e you..." the swamp witch attempted to coo much like the night owl.
Lady Visco, of course, was not up to the task of identifying the sounds of the evening wildlife. "H-Hmm? W-What was that, Metallia? I couldn't quite hear you..."
"... -ve you..."
"Huh?"
"... A-Ah, screw it! Let's just kiss some more already, you mangy mutt!"
"There you go again!" the dog-like princess yet again puffed out one cheek, but not for long. Oh goody, I wonder where this is going? "... But fine... on one condition!"
Lia's eyebrows furrowed at the unexpected turnabout. "T-The hell? C-Condition? Now we're strikin' a deal?"
Ah, I see that sly expression in Viscole's eyes! She is most definitely a crafty one indeed. Quite a dangerous trait... if this wasn't Viscole we were dealing with. "I take charge this time! You're always telling me what to do, Metallia, so now it's time for my vengeance!"
"V-Vengean...!? H-Huh!?" And with a leap expected from a mighty lion of legend, the dog pounced on the witch, the two vitriolic best friends joining together some more via an intimate union of oral orifices. All was well with the world... Why, it was almost as if it were straight out of a dream...
A dream come true? Or just a dr-
Slam!
Supreme Swamp Witch Metallia instantly lurched in her seat at the obnoxiously obtrusive onomatopoeia. No longer did she find herself locked to the lips of Lady Viscole, nor was she surrounded by the 'beautiful' outside horrible toxic air. No, dear Master Lia was now inside her prison of a domain, sitting on a sofa that needed to be dusted centuries ago.
What was that sound? Why, it sounded like the front door! Our protagonist's ears perked up at once, much like the 'animal' she was waiting for.
"H-Huh!? DOG!... Oh... it's you..." In a flash, Master Lia's hopes were thrashed yet again, as instead of the canine-esque princess finally returning at long last, her small familiar, Hundred Knight, had entered. No doubt slacking off on his duties again... I like the way he thinks, yes.
Sir Hundred Knight was as vocal as always; he cocked his armored head to the side, brought his rather large index finger beneath his chin, and made a questioning sound reminiscent of one of Master Lia's plush teddy bears that she denies owning.
Our dear witch's shoulders sank, but she quickly rebounded with skillful grace back into her usual ungrateful... I mean, lovable demeanor. "... So damn confusing... Anyway, Hundred Knight... W-What the hell are you doing back here already?! Go back to searching around for more info, or whatever..." The small black helmeted apparent weapon of mass destruction made another indecipherable sound, and quickly sprinted out the door from whence it came, no doubt fearing a rain of molten rocks at any moment. Once again, smart thinker.
This left Lia alone again, destined to face her turmoil in solitude. "... Ah, screw em all!" Or, I suppose she will just act unperturbed by all this. "... I must be reading too many dang crappy romance novels... Visco, where did you go? Damn you, making me feel... weird... Crap, this headache's just getting worse..." The reality of everything returning to its rightful place, our witch protagonist sank even deeper into the couch, rubbing her balmy forehead.
And that, dear audience, is the path 'Metallia' shall walk the rest of this day, and maybe some more to come. Who can say? Why, I certainly can not.
Such a travesty. I am sorry, Master Lia. Maybe your fleeting dream can one day become more than just a mere hopeful mirage... if you'd ever even allow it. As for today, however, it is simply nothing but a reach for the stars...
...
~STAFF~
LOCALIZATION PRODUCERS
Ghostdominion6
JG
The Authority
Phantom Productions
The 'A' Brothers
7780s Studio
PRODUCERS
Imposter Candidate Files Inc.
Ghostdominion6
Dwindling Talent Creative
DHARMA Initiative
PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS
Deleted scripts
Dying batteries
Lack of (and sudden random bursts of) motivation
A whim
- and last but not least -
A new OTP for the ages!
CAST
Metallia - Metallia/Metallic-*lawsuit*
Visco - Viscole Dotrish
Hunny Knight - The Hundred Knight
Unspecified Object in Background - Great Lamptree #3
Narrator - Not Mani
SPECIAL THANKS
The fanfic files of Nepgeo. We're posting this because we know it's what you'd want. If you're reading this, wherever you are... please come home. - Linda
DISCLAIMER: No major continuity was harmed in the posting of this particular event in Master Lia's life. No carrots were harmed either, despite her wishes otherwise...
Please review! Or don't, like usual.
...
... Oh, but do not fret too hard, Master Lia. Not all hope is lost; far from it. Master Visco may have gone missing here... but there are a multitude of worlds out there... Perhaps in one of them, she never left at all... Just the opposite, in fact; maybe she stayed longer than anyone could have ever anticipated. Almost as if that dream was... a sneak-peak at another life. Yes...
"... H-Huh? The hell're you blabbering about? Multitude of... worlds? What is that supposed to... Wait... where da hell are you?"
...
NEXT TIME(?)
The Witch and the 01000001 01101100 01110100 01100101 01110010 01101110 01100001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01000011 01101111 01110101 01110000 01101100 01100101