Hello there! Just an incredibly silly/cute/stupid thing I did. Fluff mixed with silliness. Re-watching SAO and it just doesn't ever get old.

Anyway, enjoy! :D

Tender Enough?

In an otherwise peaceful and quiet morning, Kirito was startled by a loud banging sound. He flinched, his legs bending instinctively and his hand twitching toward his sword. He looked around himself, searching for the source and came up empty.

His eyes flicked to the trees, to the leaves rustling in the wind, to the river trickling along beside him in the forest. Nothing was making that sound.

Wham!

He jumped again, whirling around and looking back to where he'd sworn it was coming from. There was another beat of silence before another loud 'bam' was heard. It was coming from the direction of the cabin. He cocked his head to the side as the whams and bams became more frequent, a nerve pinching in his neck as the thought of something ill happening to Asuna crossed his mind.

His eyes widened slightly at the thought and he immediately, without a second of hesitation, sprinted off in the direction of their residence. He ran, smacking into tree branches and stumbling over roots. He'd gone out for some light hunting in the morning. It was just barely past the break of dawn so he figured no one would really be up.

He loved Asuna dearly, more than he'd ever loved anyone before, but he simply didn't know what to do with himself resting that long. He liked rest and relaxation, he liked taking some time off from the frontlines, but he found himself a bit fidgety. Not a single day had really gone by in the game that he hadn't been fighting one thing or another, even if it was just some game-created creature of a much lower level than he was. And so he'd figured, after a week of rest, that maybe he could sneak out in the morning before either Asuna or Yui was awake, and get a little bit of training in.

It hadn't ever crossed his mind that something could happen to Asuna while he was gone. He should have more faith in her; that banging sound was probably her beating the living daylights out of some NPC that had snuck up on her. She did have a rather quick draw.

He burst out of the forest and into open field, the cabin easily visible and within hearing distance.

Wham!

Yep, it was definitely coming from the cabin. He picked up the pace, panting as he flew to the house, rushing up the steps and throwing open the door.

"Asuna?" It was quiet. He paused with his hand on the doorknob, waiting for a sound. There wasn't a peep, either from Asuna or that strange banging sound. He closed the door gently, his hand resting on his sword and at the ready. He creeped forward, the wood beneath him creaking slightly as he rounded the corner, peering into the kitchen.

She was standing there, in her pajamas, heaving and starting angrily down at a piece of chicken on the counter. She hadn't spotted him yet and he let out a relieved sigh. She was fine… but what was that noise?

He watched her for a second longer. She wiped a strand of hair out of her face with the back of her hand and looked over to where the door was, where he'd shouted from. She saw him then, still panting to herself as her eyes narrowed in his direction. She glared at him for a moment before plastering on a clearly fake smile and raising the meat tenderizer in her hand.

WHAM!

Man, she'd really hit the crap out of that chicken. It was absolutely deafening now, much louder than it had been outside. She continued to smash the piece of meat, grunting to herself and slamming the metal vessel onto it, the chicken nearly as flat as a piece of paper by the time Kirito got his mind under control and came out from hiding.

"Asuna?" he asked, his eyebrows pinched together in confusion as he traipsed toward the counter. "Do you really need to tenderize it? I mean, I know you're the cook and all but I'd think the meat would be plenty tender on its own in a game."

She paused for a second, again sending him that fake smile. "Oh? Do you think it's tender enough?" she growled, slamming the gavel back down onto the chicken with another loud wham.

He maybe wasn't the most well-versed when it came to women, but he definitely could tell that tenderizing meat wasn't exactly what was on her mind. "Asuna?" he asked. The corner of his mouth twitched upward and toward a smile. He couldn't help it; she was so cute when she was peeved. He reached forward, grabbing the chicken and peeling it off of the counter. He held it up to his eye to get a better look at it. "Yeah, it looks good to me," he humored her.

She took a deep breath before gently setting the tenderizer back onto the counter. "Good," she said, roughly reaching forward and taking the meat from him, throwing it straight into the sink. It was so mushy by now that it nearly just slid down the drain on its own.

Kirito let out a strangled gasp, reaching weakly after the chicken. He liked chicken. He collapsed onto the counter. "Why?" he groaned. "It looked really good," he added. Maybe she was mad at him but he was starving, and he'd eat even pulverized chicken if it was made by her. She could make cardboard taste like a five-star meal.

"Because it didn't leave its wife at home while it went out training at the crack of dawn," she snapped, yanking a towel out of a drawer and wiping her hands off, any attempt she'd given at concealing her anger toward Kirito now gone as she glared.

Oh, so that's why she was so angry. He gave her an awkward laugh, reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck. "Oh, that. Sorry, I was getting a little… restless."

She frowned deeper. "Don't you think I'm getting restless too?" she asked. "I mean yes, this is absolutely wonderful, taking a break from it all and spending time with you but it feels… weird, too." She made a face before shaking her head and pointing a finger at him, only a few inches away from his nose. "I'm in here toiling away and you're out there having fun," she said. "You can see how I'd be a little bit angry."

He watched her carefully as she mumbled to herself, still wiping her hands on that towel. She was acting angry although he knew she wasn't as mad as she sounded. A smile broke out across his face. Once again he was reminded exactly why he'd fallen in love with her. She was hard to get, yes, and hard to get used to, too, but she was… her. She was just like him. She was a fighter, she was tough, and she'd rather be out hunting with him than taking care of the cabin like a housewife. That was part of the reason she seemed to stand out amongst the crowd of other women.

He quickly and easily made his way around the counter, grinning to himself as he slipped his arms around her waist and she squeaked softly to herself, unable to keep up the grumpy look on her face. He leaned over and whispered in her ear. "Well then, I'll just have to take you with me next time." He sighed and looked over at the sink longingly, the chicken just barely poking out of the drain. "But Asuna," he whined, "I really wanted chicken."

She growled, slapping his hands away with the towel, unable to keep a smile off of her face.

The Non-Flash Bingo - tender - any anime/manga containing talking non-humans - 1,297 words

See? Silly and stupid and cute? Heh. This is my first shot at writing for Kirito and Asuna. I hope I didn't botch them too badly. XD

~Foxtail-chan