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All You Leave Behind
Her breath is slow, uneven, she feels cold, as the winter breeze fills her lungs. The leaves crunch under her feet as she pads deeper into the woods. She stumbles upon a memory. Many years ago she thought this place was lost, and forgotten, like most of the souls that deceased in the war for a better world, a better place for all those who suffered.
Loud feet and desperate gasping disrupt her train of thought,
Katniss, she hears. No, no, no. The mutts are after her.
She falls to her knees and begs for him to just help her, for god's sake, help her.
The space is solidified. She was running, while her lungs, limbs, and heart, were aching. A familiar feeling builds up in her chest as the sobs succumb her body, letting them envelop her as arms do the same.
The cold disappears, but the crying does not stop, it never stops. All she left behind, never truly left her to walk on her own.
Shaking, she's breaking.
She trembles; they're going to eat me alive.
"Help me." She pleads for him to do something. She pleads for him to make it all stop.
Two people, one holding onto the other whilst they lose their sanity for the final time.
•••
Back in the warmth of their home, Peeta brews a cup of tea for her, she settles herself down on the old green sofa in the living room, cold, feeling frail, feeling small.
She sips on the hot, bitter liquid and closes her eyes; she feels a warm hand, placed on her knee, her tears long since dried, but more persist to fall over the rims of her eyelids.
"Do you feel better now?" Peeta asks, his blue eyes not as vibrant as they usually are.
It takes her a while to respond, she looks into his worried eyes and decides to relieve him of his stress. "Yes." She croaks, her voice raw from the yelling, screaming, pleading.
"Don't run off like that, Katniss, you know that we both-"
"Sometimes, Peeta, sometimes I just cannot help myself." She deadpans, her emotionless eyes staring into his sorrowful ones. She rests the heated mug on the table beside her and sighs. He drops his hand.
"I'm sorry that I can't help it." She mutters, looking away from him.
"It's not your fault, Katniss, for the last time-"
"Sometimes I feel like it is." Her last word comes out as a sob.
"Oh Katniss…" He whispers, she leans into him, her head falling onto his shoulder, he draws her into his arms, her shoulders shake as she releases her emotions, the very ones that built up behind the wall inside of her. "Never beat yourself up for something that is not your fault."
Katniss manages a small nod when Peeta kisses the top of her head; comfort is shrouded over her lamenting soul.
All you leave behind.
Never.
Leaves.
You.