AN: Well guys, here's that crackish fic I was talking about. ._. It was inspired by a creepy dream and me watching too much Flashdance. 8D

Consider this chapter kind of a pilot; I just wanna see what you guys think. c: Information on why and such is included at the bottom of a recent one-shot of mine "The Perfect Tenant". It's mainly just a way of getting me to start writing again, as I've recently not had the willpower to continue any of my fics. Hopefully that will change!

I've already written up to chapter 6 of this, and have done an ACTUAL PLAN FOR IT! *So proud of myself srsly*

I've got a creepy obsession with the male ballet. *-* Like, not the type with the overly top-heavy men, but the cute 'lil all-men ballet groups~

I can just imagine Sasori and Deidara being in the ballet, as they're both so elegant-looking 8D *gets shot*

Also, this fic will be nowhere near as long nor serious as my other fics, so It'll definitely be finished quickly. It's pretty much just a blank canvas that will hopefully encourage me to get some more damn writing done for you all.

Well, I hope you enjoy it ('tho I'll probably post a couple of chapters, just to give you a better perspective~), please don't hesitate to tell me what you think~!

Deidara's POV

"I can't believe you got in and I didn't, un!" I whined, exiting the audition hall with my best friend, Hidan.
"Just goes to prove that I'm better at street dance~" The albino chimed in reply, swinging a muscular arm around my slender neck. "Much better~"
"Quit it." I scowled, turning my head to face the taller male. "It's not like it was anything big; you get a few gigs, nothing special."
"You wouldn't be saying that if you got in, fucker!" Hidan pouted, pushing me away.

I chuckled darkly, crossing my arms. "I'll show you one day, un."

The truth was, I was the better dancer. Street dance had been my hobby for years, way before Hidan became involved. In fact, the only reason why Hidan was chosen from the audition was because he had a much stronger build compared to my slender one. Of course, this didn't make him any better at street dance, it just make him appear to look better.

We had just come back from some seedy audition for a few gigs at a local bar Hidan had dragged me to. Of course, the requirements were nothing special, relating back to the fact why Hidan was one of the dancers chosen for it; his body was stronger. Less people would come to the bar if the performer's bodies were not impressive.

Either way, I could do much better than some crummy little bar. I belonged on television, or performing in front of celebrities! Or both!

I had become interested in the art ever since I was young, probably around 8 or 9 years old. I just loved how far you could push your limits, whether you were tall or short, skinny or fat, weak or strong; street dance had so many styles and techniques, anyone could pull it off if they practiced hard enough.

Sure, I sucked at first; but most people did. However after what turned into months of practice and training was completely worth it.

"Look, it's the fairy squad!" Hidan suddenly laughed, coming to a halt on the street. I quirked an eyebrow, smirking at a tall, handsome male with dark long hair, standing by the steps of the ballet academy, "Mannequins". From behind, one would think the man was female if not due to his toned arms. In fact, if he wasn't as toned, he definitely wouldn't have been able to pull of the leggings and tight vest.

Ballet was one of the few dance forms I didn't respect. Unlike street dance, in ballet you had to be perfect. You had to be the right build, height, shape- if even the slightest thing was wrong with you, whether it was having a slightly uneven arms or large legs: you were out. Even if you had trained for years.

Of course, you could carry it on as a hobby, however that problem would haunt the rest of your life dancing. Sure, that sounds extremely cliche and even over the top, but the amount of people I've met in bars who had failed ballet all to do with their bodies was ridiculous. Ballet didn't give you a chance unless you looked perfect, it was a judgmental style which quite frankly was far too ambitious.

"Are you just going to gawk or would you like to ask me something?"

My thoughts were cut short when I came back to reality, seeing the dark-haired male staring at me with a slight frown. I had only realised just then that me and Hidan had been standing in the middle of the pathway, staring.

"You've been staring for 2 minutes now." He added, stepping forward.
"...Fuck off 'ya fairy!" Hidan bellowed, grabbing my hand and running past the confused male. I couldn't help but laugh at Hidan's outgoing behavior towards pretty much everyone, running with him.

I panted loudly when we reached the pizza shop down the road, which was run by Hidan's uncle. Sure, the place certainly wasn't a 5 star restaurant of any sort, or very big, but what it lacked in appearance it made up in with delicious food and a homely atmosphere. When I say homely, I mean homely: All the staff are related to each other somehow, and all closer than peas in a pod.

I watched from a small table in the corner as Hidan climbed over the counter of the shop, piling slices of pizza of all different sizes and toppings onto two plates, not giving an utter fuck about the gawking customers who probably thought the albino was robbing the place (well, technically he was).

"Hey, Dei!" he called, going through the large refreshment cooler. "Bring our food to the table!"

I sighed, slipping off the chair and leaving my bag in the corner, going to retrieve the food.

"You want a beer or something?" Hidan inquired, slamming a bottle of a local brand onto the counter.
"Uh, just a cola, un." I replied blankly, carrying the plates back to the charming little table.

"Jeez, you're an adult now, don't you think you've outgrown fucking soda?" He half-joked, pulling out a bottle of the desired drink anyway. "Live a little."
"I think everyone in this room is living, to be honest." I smirked, taking a bite of pizza as the silver-haired male arrived back at our table.
"Wouldn't be so fucking sure, Grandad's looking like he could go at any fucking second." The albino muttered, staring at the old man near the bar. "He might have already kicked the bucket, actually."

I simply chuckled, turning my head as I took a swig of cola.

"Hey, Hidan?" I asked, earning a look from the other male. "You're not gonna get overly cocky with this whole gig thing and ditch me, right?"
Hidan chuckled, shaking his head. "Might do." He stated, downing his beer. "So be sure not to cramp my style, blondie."
"Same to you." I scowled teasingly.

Truth be told, I wouldn't be surprised if the albino did ditch me. He had done it in the past before for his own selfish reasons, but of course just came crawling back when things didn't work out for him.

That was just one of Hidan's many faults; he was incredibly self-centered. He believed he was some kind of god or "chosen one", often resulting in him being beaten up and having few friends- something which I would always have to pick up the pieces to.

Of course, I wasn't at all surprised when Hidan did ditch me. A few nights after his first performance he and his new "friends" told me to fuck off, and that I wasn't a real dancer. I tries to protest, but of course they just kicked me around and told me to go home. I haven't spoken to Hidan since, and I'm not sure if I want to for some time.

This is where the real story begins, when I decided to venture around town and harass innocent people in order to make myself feel better.

You're in for a pretty fucked up story from this point on.

Lololol, well that's the first chapter, I'll post the second shortly after. Like Dei said, this is a pretty fucked up plot line which only people with pretty fucked up minds (like me 8D), would probably like.

Though to be honest, I can't imagine this fic being particularly popular due to the same reasons as above, so please don't feel pressured into reading it^^ It's mainly to feed my crackish mind"""""

But hey, if you enjoyed or would like to tell me anything about this chapter, please don't hesitate to review, my lovelies^^