"Lay down a card or stay!" Cala rasped

"I'm thinking."

"You've thought long enough!"

"The human's right, move Quermian," a Xexto said.

"Fine, plus two. That gives me eighteen."

Cala looked into the mind of the over-adorned Wroonian. She had fourteen on the table and a six in her hand. Save it, let the others spend their hands, Cala put in her mind.

"I'll stay." Cala smirked venomously and gulped her drink.

"Plus one makes nineteen," said the Xexto

"I've got four. That gives me twenty," Cala said, taking a drag on her cigara.

"That's the fourth game, she's cheating!" the Quermian said. Cala gave the Xexto a spike of annoyance.

"No one that drunk can cheat at pazaak."

"Pay up. A hundred creds a piece."

Cala collected her winnings and departed. She passed the wanted poster of herself. She scowled, pulled a death stick out of her pocket, opened it, and drank the foul liquid unmixed. Colors and shapes started blurring, lines twisted, colors danced, pleasure shot through her body. How long had it been since that had been put up? How long had Revan been looking for her? How long had she been on The Wheel? She couldn't remember, and didn't try.

She was in no danger of being recognized from that picture, she had changed. Her skin, once even and supple, had turned sallow, leathery, and sunken. The veins of her hands were clearly visible and dark from use of tempest spice. Her hair was thinned, greasy and unkept. She posture was off, her joints stiff. Her grey eyes had turned yellow rimmed with red.

The liquor, the smoke, the glitterstim, the ryll, the tempest, and the death sticks would have killed most people by now, but not Cala Shan. Her tortured body was driven inexorably by the dark side, heart was kept pumping long after it should have ceased, neurons still fired in her brain long after they should have died. Her addictions were just another kind of passion, they gave her the will to master the dark side, and with it she purged her tissues of toxins and stimulated her vital organs to life. The death sticks would normally weaken power in the Force, but she had so harnessed the will to acquire more of them that she could protect herself from the effect.

Her's was a miserable existence, an endless cycle of theft and cheating followed by rapturous highs followed by pain and sickness and craving. But under toning all of it was the still raw shame of her own darkness, and everything she did scrapped that raw stop mercilessly. The entire galaxy was caustic to her.

"Get a move on miss," a Twi'lek security guard said. Partially roused from her hallucinogenic stupor, Cala found herself slumped in a corner of a street of casinos. Their extravagant lights marked them as particularly up scale. Or maybe that was just the death sticks.

"Leave me alone."

"Move or be moved schutta."

Cala hissed at him and stood up shakily. "Leave me alone or I'll make you eat your own lekku."

He leveled his blaster. "Last chance before I blast you, scram!" She cast his blaster aside and grabbed his heart within his chest, squeezing it. He clutched at his chest and his skin flushed with the blood. She squeezed harder, and she felt the tissues strain. He started coughing violently, blood spewed from his mouth, and he fell.

"Man down!" shouted a Duros in a guard uniform as he ran over. "What happened?" he leveled his blaster. Cala was growing annoyed, but now favored flight over fight. She waved a hand.

"I have nothing to do with this, I can go."

"You have nothing to do with this, you can go."

Cala descended to the poorer districts of The Wheel to find a corner in which her pleasures would not be disturbed. She had been forced to purge most of the hallucinogenics from her system and felt cheated out of her high, so she was hungry to compensate herself. She reached for a death stick, and panic gripped her. Her pocket was empty! She search her coat wildly for more, a look of primitive desperation filled her eyes. Then she found one in a lower pocket. She hugged it close to her heart. Could she mix it some ryll? Or tempest maybe? Yes, that would be divine. She opened the death stick.

It flew from her hand. "That is the last one of those you will ever touch Cala." She turned. Before her stood Oren Halsi.

"You!" She didn't want him to be here. She didn't want to exist in the same galaxy as him. Such shame… Why was he here?!

"Please come with me Cala."

"No, never."

"I can help you if you just come with me."

"Don't you get it?! I can't, it isn't meant be!"

"All I ask is that you follow me."

"No!" and she ignited her lightsabers and came at him. Cala was immediately surprised. Oren was a poor opponent. His posture was wrong, his movements indecisive, he was no duelist at all. She had faced him only when she was weak and unbalanced. Now she darker than any other time of her life. She was ferocious, and he was forced to yield and step back again and again. Then he leaped back, extinguished his staff, and knelt.

"What are you doing!? Fight me!"

"If you wish to kill me then it must be done in cold blood."

Cala screamed in fury. But in that scream the remainder of her fury was lost. Without it, she was overcome with weariness, and resigned to his will.

"No," she said and extinguished her sabers.

"Cala, I beg you, accept my humble forgiveness, I have failed you, completely and utterly. Now I hope only to repair some of the damage I have done."

"What? You mean you blame yourself for this, not me?"

"I was the master, I am totally to blame. I was foolish to think I could properly train a padawan, I was too heavy handed, too blatant."

"I've been so guilty… I couldn't control myself at all... I just wanted to disappear."

"That can end, just come with me."

"Okay."

Oren waved a hand. "Sleep in peace Cala." And she allowed him to put her to sleep, and he carried her to his ship.

oOo

The first thing Cala perceived was the sound of waves, then the sweet music of some exotic alien bird. She opened her eyes. She was under the shade of trees and Oren was kneeling over her.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"Where are we?"

"A deserted island on Velmor, a peaceful place."

"I feel… good, I'd forgotten what that felt like."

"I kept you unconscious while I purged most of the poisons from your body. I was afraid the cravings would make you violent."

Cala looked away. "Yeah, that was all pretty foolish of me, getting hooked on all that stuff, but didn't know what to do, I just wanted to loose myself."

"I know, I understand. It was foolish, but it was ultimately my fault."

"No, you don't get it. I am dark to the core, I saw it in myself on Rhen Var."

"Cala, we shouldn't dwell on that right now. We have business to attend to."

"Like?"

"Healing. You and I need to work together."

"Didn't you just say the poisons were purged?"

"Most of them, yes. But it will take time, and the Force, to totally break your physical and mental addictions, and repair your body."

Cala looked down. She was startled to find herself naked under a light blanket. "I, er… I mean,"

"I am sorry if it is embarrassing. I had to establish physical contact over every surface of the body to reach the toxins as deep as I could."

"Oh… right."

"You have my word I remained clinical, I am a jedi after all."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it, no big deal." She looked out at the water. "Can I get some exercise? I haven't been anywhere this nice in… a long time."

"Of course, let me get you some clothes." And went away to get some.

"Oren?"

"Yes?"

"How long was I on The Wheel?"

"About a year."

"A year?! I… I thought it was no more than six weeks. A whole year… Well, I guess I'm nineteen now."

"Happy birthday, sorry I am missed the celebration."

"Yeah, I'm sure I got a really good high that day."

"I am sorry, that was obtuse of me."

"Don't worry about it."

"Here, how will this do?" He held a sundress in his hands.

"Did you go on a shopping spree Oren? Or are you just a master of using the Force to turn fur into summer ware?"

Oren smiled in his good-natured way. "Yes, I spent a good deal of those thirty thousand credits on supplies. I did not want to be forced to leave you for want of them."

"At least something good came of my…" She broke off and sighed.

"Do not focus on the negative, keep your mind in the here and now." He laid the dress on the ground before her and gentlemanly turned his back. Cala stood up and stretched her joins. They were stiff, but not painful. She looked herself over. She had been aware of her own decay before, and she seemed much healed. Lines could still be seen in her skin, but they were softening, and her complexion was pale rather than sallow, and her dark veils were gone. She put on the dress.

"You can turn around now." He turned. "Do I look awful?"

"You look like you are healing, that is all that is important right now."

"Okay, let's just go for a walk. The sea looks beautiful."

oOo

The next weeks did bring healing, healing of the mind, body, and spirit. Driven by mutual guilt, they put light and darkness aside for a time, and relished their time together. When Cala felt the many stages of pain and exasperation from withdrawal, Oren comforted her with his words and with the Force. They talked, they got to know each other, they strolled the beaches, they swam in the sea, they explored the jungle. When Cala felt the need for challenge, she took to hunting game and spear fishing. When she didn't, Oren provided all while she relaxed under the favorable weather. Cala never asserted her darkness, and Oren never preached the light.

But as time passed, and Cala grew more hale, she grew afraid and depressed. What would happen when she healed? Would Oren try and teach her again? Would they part company? Would they kill each other? Cala didn't want their current situation to end; she wanted to remain sick indefinitely. For a time her wish seemed to come true. Even though her addictions were broken, her body remained ravaged, and perhaps even became more so. It was the physical manifestation of her anxiety. Oren continued to attend to her diligently, but after a while he became secretly frustrated, and spoke to her.

"Cala, I think it is time we speak."

"Do we have to?"

"For both our sakes, yes."

"You're going to try and turn me to the light side again? It won't work, trust me."

"I have come to accept that I cannot simply teach you, I have seen into you as well now. But now we are presented with a choice; we take my ship to the nearest port and go our separate ways."

"I could never go back to my old life now, or any other without you."

"Or I could form a Force bond between us."

"A what? Have you lost it? Do you even know if that's possible?"

"The potential for one has long existed between us, the only thing keeping us apart has been our disparate alignments."

"Oh, is that all? I'm sure we can overcome something as trivial as that."

"It can be done if we try."

"Well I won't."

"Why not?"

"Oren… I don't know what I'll do to you if we're linked… I may corrupt you, the thought of that is unbearable. If I'm to be dark, leave me to do it alone."

"I cannot do that Cala. Besides, you underestimate my intuition into the Force. I am a consular. If you had been trained as a jedi, you would be guardian, which is euphemism for warrior. I have a deeper understanding of the Force."

"That doesn't mean you feel what I feel in myself. Why can't we just stay here, forget about everything else?"

"It will go wrong. Before long it will go terribly wrong. It is inevitable. This is our only choice." Cala looked away in silence. "Please Cala, trust me."

"Alright, what do I need to do?"

"Just follow my lead." Oren took her hand.

"What's going to happen?"

"I have no idea."

Cala felt him borrowing into her mind. She shivered at how alien his felt in her's. He kept going, like a worm he made his way up through her subconscious and into the highest reaches of her mind. "Don't fight it; I am almost through." Then he stopped and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Brace yourself." Then Cala felt as if the Force were being sucked out of her through the intrusion. She held firm. Beads of sweat appeared on Oren's forehead. She was being extruded. She was being pulled into Oren, deep into his mind, his soul. She started feeling light headed, and, just as she felt she would pass out, Oren stopped. Oren's voice strained. "Cala listen to me, your mind is stretched into mine like a rubber band, when I let go of it, my mind will come flooding into yours. Be as ready as you can." She nodded.

Then it came. A thousand memories and buried emotions from her own mind burst upon her, followed by totally unfamiliar ones. They piled up much faster than she could process, the sensory overload burned her like a blinding light. As she started wondering how long she could take it, the surge deflected out of her mind, it was a pressure wave. It bounced back weaker, and then again, and again, and again until it was only the faintest ripple between them.

Then the link stabilized, and they began to feel each other. Cala reached out across their bond and felt Oren's light. Then she felt Oren, his living presence, feeling her darkness. She sensed his wonder, his restrained fear. But it did not corrupt him. They simultaneously raised their heads and looked each other in the eye.

They spoke as one. "Wow."

"So, that is the dark side of the Force?"

"Yeah, it's really something isn't it?"

"You are not going to change at all."

"Neither are you."

"So, what do we do now?"

"We stop worrying about each other's alignment, and we carry on."

Things then went, for a while, much as they had before. Oren conducted treatments trough their link, healing her at the deepest physical and mental level. Her skin tanned and returned to its smooth gleam, returned to its former beauty. The sickly reds and yellows of her eyes returned to grey. And she was happy again.

Their link made it possible, it quieted all doubts of intent and honesty. Regardless how much they explored each other's alignment, Oren remained light, seeking to serve even after Cala healed, and She remained dark, seeking pleasure and victory in the sea and in the jungle. She had outbursts of emotion from time to time, but they passed harmlessly; Oren knew how to dispel them. There was a strange harmony between them, a sublime balance.

oOo

As Oren made his way back to camp, he saw Cala sitting on the beach. As he came over, she stood and said, with a saccharine grin, "Come with me."

Oren sensed something powerful looming concealed on the other side of their bond, but followed her nonetheless. Cala walked to their camp and ducked behind a tree. As Oren walked up to it, he heard a mysterious, playful laugh. Then, with all the smooth, haughty, grace of a Nexu, Cala strutted around the corner completely naked.

"Wha-"

"Sh, Oren." She draped her arms around him. "Open your eyes! We're in love! We are hopelessly in love!"

"I am a jedi! I-"

"And I'm a sith?"

"Well… yes."

"No, we're neither of those things. Look at us! We have no orders, just each other. All I have is you, and I want you, I want to feel you… I want to feel you in me!"

"But…"

"Tell me you don't want it. Go on, tell me and I'll stop."

"Cala, I… I am yours, forever, faithfully, I am yours."

That was more than enough warrant for Cala. `

oOo

Cala perked her head up. She heard… yes, an engine! A ship's engine! Cala looked up through the trees and saw an imperial shuttle pass overhead. What was that doing on a remote corner of Velmor? It was heading in the direction of camp. I should be with Oren, this might be important, they might land somewhere in the area. She threw down her hunting spear and ran for camp.

Then she heard the sound, unmistakable even at a great distance, of the ship descending. She quickened her pace. Has Dad found me? No, that's imposable. Find us out here? No way. Just as she thought this, she was struck dumb by a presence she felt through her bond. Oren sensed a presence that she knew well: Revan. Her worst nightmare had come true. She ran frantically now. A thousand different images of Oren's death filled her mind. Then, bleeding through Oren's best efforts to protect her, she felt terrible pain inflicted on him. Revan has him! He's torturing him! Fear for Oren transmuted into hatred of Revan.

Within a hundred meters of camp she went into Force stealth. She heard the roar of Force lightning. As she entered the camp she saw them. Oren slumped on his knees before Revan; two sith with ignited sabers flanked him.

"I'll ask you again; what have you done with her!?"

"You will never take her back."

Revan kicked in the gut, then again, and again. Cala torn her eyes away and grabbed her lightsabers from a bag next to their bed. They carried red crystals now, synthesized both in celebration of her darkness and spite of her father.

"I'm losing patience jedi, tell me where Cala Shan is."

"I'm right here!" Cala sent Revan and his masked guards flying and ran to Oren's side. He was singed and bruised. Cala lent him her strength in the Force to heal himself.

"Cala… my daughter, I don't know what lies he's told you, but please, come with me!"

"There are no lies between us old man. But thanks for coming out here so I can…" Oren squeezed her bare arm and their bond resonated, "No."

"Don't touch her!"

Cala sighed. "Dad, I don't want anything to do with you, or Mom, or the sith. We're happy here. Be content with that and leave."

"We're? We're happy here? Don't tell me this… has seduced you!"

"It's more like I seduced him."

"Come with me peacefully, and I will allow him to live."

"Never."

Revan ignited his saber and turned to his guards. "Kill the jedi, but harm one hair on my daughter's head and you will die a death too terrible to imagine."

"Yes, my lord," and they ignited their sabers. Cala took pleasure that she could finally face him the way she'd always wanted.

"We fight as one," Oren said as he ignited his saberstaff.

The sith charged. With a quick motion, Oren sent one fly towards him. The sith brought his saber to bare in time to block Oren's attack but fell to Cala's swift strike. As Revan came upon them Cala put herself in front, shielding Oren. He passed his own strength to her, only occasionally pursuing an opening. Cala took down the other sith in a flash. Now the duel that Cala wanted was nigh. They knew each other's strengths and weakness intimately. Apart from the emotional charge, the duel felt almost rehearsed; they knew exactly what to attack and what counter attack the other would use. The real duel was four or five move in the future; the strikes were just formalized agreements. The duel went on for what seemed like hours until Oren, all but forget on the side lines, seized the chance for a sun djem, destroying Revan's lightsaber.

Cala held her sabers at his throat.

"If you kill him you will regret it for the rest of your life. I know you still love him."

"We can't let him go free! He'll hunt us down again."

"And if you kill him? Your mother will come, and you will have to kill her to. Then the Empire will be left in hands of who-knows who. The Empire will destabilize, the galaxy will be driven into ruin again. It cannot take that, not yet."

"So what? What do we care? We can stay here."

"You know that is not true, you will grow restless, you will seek power, seek to start our own order. And perhaps… someday… something more, together."

"You don't know him; his tenacity has no end."

"Cala my girl, you've grown up." Revan spoke but did not raise his head. "I'd hoped this was some misguided adventure of youth, but now I see that it's more. I always had the nagging sense that your destiny laid on a path apart from mine, and it seems you've found it. Go away, away from the empire, away from me, and I won't trouble you, on one condition."

"What?"

Revan stood up. "Let me hold you in my arms one last time."

And she embraced him, the embraced of father and daughter. Cala's childhood ran like a holovid before her, form her earliest memory to that moment. The love, the hate the glee, the pain. Revan, Bastila, HK, others… many others, all in the past… gone from her life forever now.

Then she pushed him away, and he stepped back. He gave Oren a hard look.

"Look after her, jedi, or you'll have me to deal with."

Oren bowed silently.

"Good-bye, my beloved daughter, and good luck." And he depart to his ship, and they watched as it disappear into the sky.

Sorry if the end was a bit weird. Was it weird? What do you think?

Yes, I'm trying to get reviews.