Never Did Run Smooth

Part 1: Winter

Chapter 1: Saying Something Crazy

Kristoff took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

It wasn't the door to Elsa's study. When Elsa had hired a private secretary last spring, her study had been reconfigured, and now there was another room you had to go through before you actually got to her. That was where the secretary sat and guarded the entrance to her real study.

Knowing he would have to knock on two sets of doors was not making Kristoff any less nervous. It made him wish he was still wearing his mittens, just to hide his sweaty palms. But it had to be done. It had to be done, because he had to talk to Elsa, and he had to do it without Anna being around, because—

Because it was time, that was why. Because it had been a year and a half since they had met, and now he knew what he wanted, more than anything in the world, the one thing that he could maybe keep breathing without but that he couldn't live without. Because Anna's birthday was in a week and if he didn't ask now he'd never have time to get everything done.

He took another deep breath, wondering what was taking so long. That was when the voice came. "Come in."

Kristoff swallowed and opened the door.

Elsa's secretary – Moller, his name was, Master Moller – looked up when Kristoff came in. Master Moller always had a strange deer-in-the-lantern stare when he saw Kristoff. Kristoff always tried not to notice. Today it wasn't hard at all. "Um—hi. I was wondering—that is—is Elsa—I mean, can I speak with the Queen?"

The Queen. That's right. Today she's the Queen. Maybe tomorrow—maybe after Anna's birthday—she can be Elsa. But right now, she's the Queen, and don't you forget it, Kristoff Bjorgman.

"I shall see if she is free. Please wait," said Master Moller, gesturing to the rock-hard sofa just next to the door.

Kristoff sat. Master Moller got up, knocked on Elsa's study door, and slipped inside.

Kristoff waited about ten seconds before he started to tap his foot and fidget. He tugged at the cravat around his neck and somehow just made it tighter. He tried not to tug at the vest, because that might make it wrinkle. He couldn't let it wrinkle, not today. Today was important. Not as important as Anna's birthday would be, but if he screwed things up today, he'd never get to Anna's birthday, and then—

He didn't know what he would do then. He did know that he didn't want to find out.

"Master Bjorgman?"

Kristoff vaulted to his feet. "Um—um, yeah? Hi?"

Master Moller's eyes were very wide as he stared at Kristoff. "Er—the Queen will see you now. She has a few minutes."

"She will? I mean—I mean, great. Thank you. I'll, uh—I'll go in now, then?"

Master Moller slowly nodded, holding the door open. Kristoff hurried inside.

Elsa sat at her desk, as always. The fire was burning today, which was a good thing, seeing as they were already two weeks into December. She let it go out sometimes, and generally she was the last to notice.

But she wasn't working. There was a sheaf of papers by her elbow, and there were faint ink stains on the tips of her fingers, but she was just sitting and—smiling? Kristoff found himself hoping she'd still be smiling at the end of all this.

"Good morning, Kristoff. Have a seat." Elsa waved to one of the chairs opposite her desk (which always felt too small and rickety to Kristoff), and he sat. "What can I do for you?"

Kristoff had a whole speech planned. He'd gone over it with Sven half-a-dozen times; he'd practiced it in front of the mirror. He knew that damn speech line for line, and it was the best he would ever come up with.

He couldn't remember a word of it now.

"Um …" he started to say, or that was what he wanted to say. It was at that point he realized that he couldn't remember the last time he had breathed and had to gasp a bit for air.

Elsa's eyes went very wide. "Are you all right?"

No! he thought, but there was no turning back now. Why did this have to feel harder than running straight into a whiteout to find Anna? He took another deep breath and realized he'd have to start saying something.

He started at the most obvious place. "Your Majesty … I love Anna."

Elsa had looked puzzled at the honorific and more so at Kristoff's declaration. "Er … yes?"

"No—I mean—what I'm trying to say is—" Kristoff ran a hand through his hair, remembering too late the amount of time he'd spent styling it. So much for that. "I—I love her. More than anything. And I know—I know I'm not good enough for her," he said, figuring he might as well get that out of the way.

Elsa's eyes went wide in a way that Kristoff couldn't read. Not that he had much time to try right at the moment. "I know I'm not a prince or a nobleman. Or just, you know, a guy with money. Or even human parents. That I know about, that is, because I'm pretty sure I must have had some at some point, otherwise how would I be here? But—anyway. What I'm trying to say is—I love Anna. I want nothing more than for her to be happy. And I want—that is—I'd like—if I could do anything with my life, it would be to make her happy. Always. Every day, just … making her happy. And …"

Kristoff's flow of words dried up. All he could think of were the reasons why he shouldn't be asking this. Shouldn't be allowed to even think of this.

But I love her. It wasn't much—but it was all he had. And surely, in this kingdom ruled by a mistress of ice and snow, a woman whose powers could only be controlled by love, that had to mean something?

"Please, Your Majesty – just – let me try. For … for Anna."

Elsa had knit her brows together, and her head was slightly tilted. "Kristoff … what, exactly, are you asking?"

Oh, SHIT! I never asked!

Kristoff's throat went drier (was that possible?) and he tried to swallow with limited success. He took a deep breath.

It was at that point that a line from his speech actually came back to him. He grabbed it before it could wiggle out of his mind again. "I beseech—that is, I humbly beseech you, Your Majesty, for—for permission to marry Princess Anna."

Elsa's face went blank.

It was the bad blank, the one that not even Anna could read. It was like Elsa wiped all hint of expression from her face. Nobody could tell what she was thinking then.

But it could only mean one thing.

Kristoff took a deep, shaky breath. "You know, I'll just—I'll just go. Yeah. I'll go." Go where, though? Somewhere far away. Very far away. "Thank—thank you for—" He started to get up.

"Kristoff, wait!" Elsa had leaped to her feet in the interim, meaning that Kristoff had to get all the way up in a hurry. "Don't—don't go. I didn't—that is—of course you have my permission to marry Anna."

Kristoff's jaw fell. "Wait—what?"

Elsa smiled. "You have my permission to marry her. Or …" She raised an eyebrow at him. "Ask her to marry you?"

Even though he knew he shouldn't, Kristoff fell to the chair behind him. It creaked rather alarmingly, but Kristoff barely noticed. Elsa took her own seat at a more reasonable pace.

Without a word, she took the carafe of water on the desk, poured some into a glass, and held onto the glass for a moment. "Here," she said, holding the glass out to him. "Drink this."

Kristoff took the glass gratefully and drank. The water was icy cold. "Thanks," he said, putting it down.

Elsa just smiled.

"Not … not just for the water," he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I mean …"

"I know," Elsa replied, saving them both quite a bit of embarrassment.

They sat in companionable silence as Kristoff took another sip. It was amazing how much better he felt, with at least one of his big questions asked and answered favorably.

Of course … he still had to ask Anna. The thought made the nerves leap up and threaten to get the best of him. But Kristoff took a deep breath and forced them back.

"Um … so I … uh … I was wondering if maybe you might … help me?" Kristoff asked. "I—I haven't gotten Anna a ring yet."

"Oh?" Elsa asked. "Of course I'll help. Just—just tell me how much you need, and I'll see that it's taken care of."

Kristoff shook his head. "No, no—I have enough, it's just—well … you know what she likes, so I thought …"

"Oh. Oh!" Elsa smiled, and her eyes—lit up? "I'd love to!"

"Great! So, so I …" Kristoff fished a couple of papers out of his waistcoat pocket, which was supposed to hold a pocket watch, but he didn't actually have one. "The jeweler gave me some drawings."

Kristoff didn't mention that he'd had to flash his "Official Ice Master and Deliverer" medal before the jeweler would even part with that much.

He smoothed out the three colored drawings on Elsa's desk. Elsa leaned forward, brows knit, taking each in carefully.

But she made her decision without hesitation. "That one," she said, pointing to the drawing of the gold ring set with an emerald and two diamonds. Delicate crocuses had been etched into the band, and when Kristoff saw it, it seemed perfect.

"Really?" Kristoff grinned. "I mean—that was the one I liked best—but I wanted to be sure."

"She'll love it," Elsa said with a certainty that he couldn't argue with. "If you don't mind me asking … when were you planning on asking Anna?"

"Her birthday," he replied. "I thought—I mean—it seemed like the right time."

"It does," Elsa smiled. "Yes … it does seem like the perfect time."

There was something there, some other hidden meaning swimming below the surface. But it was like the fish he sometimes saw when he was out harvesting. Sure, he might be able to see it, but there was a foot or two of ice between him and it, and he wasn't going to get to it anytime soon. So Kristoff put it out of his mind.

"Yeah. So …"

Elsa smiled. "Good luck. And … er … Kristoff?"

"… Yeah?" he asked.

Elsa was twisting her hands together. "To—to make things easier—I think—it might be best if you had a title. A noble title," she clarified. "Just to … well … keep people from talking as much."

"A noble title? Me?" Kristoff asked.

"Just to make things easier," Elsa repeated. "Besides—saving the life of the heir, and by logical extension the monarch—there are many aristocrats whose ancestors gained their titles for less. Much less. I—perhaps I ought to have given one to you with the Great Thaw, really. But those are just details," she finished. "We—you and Anna and I—we can discuss what title would be best once—well, once you ask her."

The thought of a title still wasn't sitting well. He was pretty sure that adding "Lord of Such and Such" to his name wouldn't make a silk purse of this particular sow's ear. But … if Elsa said it would make things easier …

If it made it easier to marry Anna …

Kristoff could live with it.

"All right," he agreed. "If—I mean, thank you. And if you're sure."

"I'm sure," Elsa nodded. "Very sure. But—"

A knock from the door interrupted her. With an apologetic glance at Kristoff, Elsa called, "Yes?"

Master Moller looked in. "I don't mean to interrupt, Your Majesty, but Minister Falk will be here in five minutes to go over the news from Friezenburg."

"Of course," Elsa murmured. She sighed, and for a minute Kristoff thought he saw frustration and something like worry flash through her eyes. "I'll be done in a moment," she said to Master Moller.

"Yes, Your Majesty," replied Master Moller before he quietly left.

Elsa took a deep breath. "Kristoff, I am so sorry—"

"Hey—don't worry about it," Kristoff interrupted. "You already made my day—really. Thank you."

She smiled. "And you made mine. Kristoff—I can't imagine a man who would be better for Anna than you. I truly can't. Thank you for everything you've done for her."

"Don't thank me," Kristoff shrugged. "It's … it's been …" Describing what it had been was not something he could put into words. Everything?

He shook his head. "I should probably disappear before your meeting."

"Not disappear," Elsa chuckled. "But—yes, perhaps."

She got up, and he got up too. But before he could leave, Elsa had moved around the desk. She stood in front of him, tentatively, before lifting her arms just a bit. "… Kristoff?"

It took Kristoff a second to realize what she was asking for. Then, just as tentatively, he stepped forward and hugged her.

It wasn't much of a hug. If Olaf had been around, he probably would have been giving them both a lot of pointers. But for Elsa—hell, for Kristoff—the fact that there was a hug at all probably meant a lot.

"Welcome to the family," Elsa said. "Not that you weren't part of it already," she laughed a little, pulling away. "But … officially now. Welcome."

"Thanks," Kristoff said, and meant it.

He took his leave of her then, because there really wasn't much else to say. He didn't look back—his mind was already going to the jeweler's, to Anna's birthday a week from now.

If he had, he might have seen the way Elsa took a deep breath, and twisted her hands together, and then held herself as if she was cold.

He would have most certainly wondered why.

I'm baaack! My newest long fic, Never Did Run Smooth, has been posted. Or at least the first chapter of it has. Go read to learn what else is happening to our Frohana and what trials and tribulations lie in store!

(And make sure you read the first chapter – this is only the first scene, there are three others in it!)

Thank you, everyone!