Kami-Chan Disease Def-Con Center

Summary: While the world seems to be going crazy Aogami, Tsuchimikado and Maika decide to do a podcast about Touma Kamijou and the girls that seem to attract to himself. A Drabble spin off from Twist of Fate.

Note: Takes place after chapter between chapter 62 and 63


Chapter 10: Technical Difficulties

"Welcome to another episode of Kami-chan Disease Def-Con Center!" Aogami greeted the viewers. "That's what we call this, right? Honestly we don't update enough to remember."

His go-host explained, "Well, we have busy lives." The spy shrugged, "Joining us on the behind the scenes our my little sister Maika and Aogami's cousin Enshuu."

From behind the camera the girls said hello.

"Okay, we have some questions to get to so let's get to them." Aogami started off, "Maika give us our first question."

Maika picked the first question, "From UCCMaster: Would love to see an analysis of Sogiita's growing harem. The 'supposed' future son of Kamijou. Also does Accelerator have a Misaka Sister harem? Or do the Sisters still go after Touma? Shiage seems to have an ITEM minus Frenda harem and so on…"

"So my request: analysis of other growing harems with the Urban Legends expert. I would assume the Kami disease is an urban legend. Oh and maybe feature two of the most neglected characters in all the 'verse: Haruee and Edasaki."

Tsuchimikado fixed his sunglasses. "I'm still not sure how anyone thought Kami was Sogiita's father." The spy let out a sigh, "I guess I could see it, they both have spiky hair and now Sogiita seems to be starting his own harem. If people are interested we can certainly have a special focusing on him for an episode. We will need time to dig up some more information on him though. As for the thing with Accelerator… I would rather avoid talking about him. He's made it quite clear that he doesn't enjoy us talking about him on this thing. As for the sister's thing we'd have to investigate."

"I'm not sure what we could say for Hamazura." Aogami continued the discussion. "I mean, I heard he was engaged and didn't seem all that interested in having a harem or something. So, that seems like its pretty case closed. We can look into it but we might not have much to discuss."

Tsuchimikado finished off the question, "We can look into other harems and the whole thing about Kami punching people into getting harems. Just let us know if you'd all be interested in that. Also, we would have to look up those two people."

Enshuu spoke up, "We have a sort of weird one from someone called xenvic: Oh i heard from your time traveler friend, you know who I'm talking about, that I could go to this other universe with u guys in it and do you like it (a certain infinite possibility) in the more recent bits it has kami yan act as a lady killer and ends up saying in an interview he's dating all lv 5 girls hahahhahahah."

Both hosts just blinked.

Aogami just said, "I don't know how to respond to that. Time traveler? Other universes? And our Kami is already a lady killer. Why do we need another one?"

Maika got the next question. "Warmach1ne32 asks: Is there a way to cure Kami-chan's harem? or is a different more powerful disease is needed to break it's curse? Also best wishes to Fuki and Judgement Girl"

Tsuchimikado answered, "That is a matter of opinion. The girls seem pretty happy with him. Kami does seem to be better troubled trying to keep everyone happy but he seems okay. As for what it is, I think it's a disease since I doubt a curse would work on Kami."

Aogami smiled, "I'm sure Konori would be happy to hear that. She is healing up nicely. As for Fukiyoise I'm not sure if she watches this… she's been acting weird when we bring up her relationship with Kami. He's more dere dere but still willing to smack us."

"Ah," Maika spoke up. "This might be a sensitive topic for you Aogami. Geust's Account asked: So Aogami, is it okay for you to have Enshuu to be included in Kami's harem?

For the both of you, who has the potential of being "another one" (as said of another harem member) of his as of late?"

"Well-" Tsuchimikado started.

"No!" Aogami let out furiously. " Kami certainly cannot add my little sister into his harem!" He grabbed the camera. "Do you hear that Kami?!"

Tsuchimikado grabbed him trying to pull him off. "The camera is expensive."

"Etsu-onii-chan!" Enshuu yelled.

"Go to commercial!" Tsuchimikado told them.

The podcast quickly went into a commercial from Joseph's restaurant.

They returned to the show Aogami taking some deep breaths.

Enshuu picked up the next question, "Hm, the next one comes from whwsms, the question seems altered."

"Ah, I don't know anything about that," Tsuchimikado said out loud, someone with the knowledge of the magic side had sent in a question and he couldn't let that info get out.

Enshuu continued, "Ah… I think they're asking about the Touma Punch (TM) and the ability to grant a person a harem."

Aogami spoke, "We've been looking into it. There is some evidence but… He's punched us several times and we don't have harem!"

"Calm down." Tsuchimikado patted Aogami on the back before he freaked out again. They only had one camera and they were borrowing it from the school.

Enshuu continued, "There is a list of people's names and they are asking about interviewing them about the punch."

"That's something we could do." Tsuchimikado added

Maika picked the last questions, "We have some questions from SuperKinuhata and naruhinsakufan1, they're questions deal with the same idea. It's asking about some girls Lessar Leivinia and Touma's cousin, and Carissa and Villian joining Kami onii-chan harem."

Aogami explained, "There have been some reports of new girls hanging around Kami lately. I'm not sure what's the deal there. Is his harem expanding? Only time will tell. As for-"

The lights all went off.

"What's wrong?" Maika asked, "Did we have a power surge?"

Enshuu looked at the screen, "No. The computer screen is still working but it's all static. This is a flat screen that shouldn't even be possible."

Tsuchimikado looked around an odd shape that scurried passed the windows.

Before anyone could react the glass shattered and a raging deformed hound tore through it.

The monster roared as it moved towards the group.

Everything about the creature felt wrong, it's very presence felt unnatural and to some extent toxic.

Before it could attack them Aogami did, his eyes glowed green as his fist clashed onto the monster's head. The beast was flung backward into the wall, it's bones broken by the impact but it frantically tried to stand back up and continue the attack.

Aogami's arm hung limply broken by the attack, he stood between the girls and the monster.

"What is that?" Enshuu asked curiously unsure of such a creature.

Tsuchimikado took two small circular devices from his pockets and placed them on the necks of both girls. Quickly both of the girls collapsed onto the floor fast asleep.

These were devices that he kept on hand in case of emergency for such an emergency. If he needed to knock out the maid and didn't have time to explain or try to reason to her way they couldn't save someone or if he had to do something less than savory to protect her.

Already Aogami's arm started to repair itself and he stared at the monster before them seeing it slowly put itself back together.

The spy pulled out a small notebook from his pocket and tore out a page handing it to Aogami.

The blonde teenager studied the creature for a moment, "Take that page, it's everything you need to get into a hidden bunker. Take the girls and hide there. The devices on their neck will keep them out for an hour, remove them if you need to wake them up sooner."

Aogami sighed, "Something magical is happening, isn't?"

"Yeah, I thought what happened yesterday would be it but I've had a nasty feeling all day."

Aogami picked up the girls as his arm finished healing, "What are you going to do?"

"Try to figure out what's happening. Kami is probably already dragged into this mess but it can't hurt to dig into. Probably try to get some of my contacts in on this. You better get going, I don't think you'll have too long before more show up."

Aogami nodded racing out of the room as quickly as he could.

Tsuchimikado knew his friend was not the most trustworthy person but he did trust him to protect his sister.

He sighed looking out of the window and to other figures in the fog.

He pulled out his phone to call on his contacts it might be time to get GROUP back together.


Author's Notes: Updated? I guess. Some questions answered. Oh and it's going to lead right into the events of the man fic. A lot of suggestions were thrown out on what to do next, so let me know which one you'd like to see next. That is if these two manage to survive the arc. Honestly thing look pretty bleak for everyone involved.