Hey Peoples! This is RA88 comin' at ya with another annoying plot bunny that just won't leave me alone. I've noticed that there aren't that many Mordred Whump! fics and wanted to change that. I absolutely adore him and hope this story does his character justice. Anyway...(Drum Roll Please)...On with the story! :-)

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

Edit: Spelling, and Word Choice

Metal. Pavement. Screaming. Pain. That's all he could remember. Everything seemed to move in slow motion but it all blurred. It was really nothing to go by, but all or that nothing kept replaying in his head over and over and over again. Metal. Pavement. Screaming. Pain. Metal. Pavement. Screaming. Pain. Metal. Pavement. Screaming. Pain. Then it all stopped when the darkness took over.

Bright. Now it was bright, far too bright. And it was all white too. Was he dead? "No, no. Not dead. I don't think so." He thought to himself. If he were dead, he was pretty sure there wouldn't be that annoying sound in the distance that insisted on driving him mad. He couldn't tell what kind of sound it was. Only that it was there, and it was annoying. There was a smell too. It wasn't overly familiar, but familiar enough. He just couldn't place it though.

"Open your eyes" whispered a voice in his head. And so he did. As the bright white bliss faded away, new stark white surroundings and pain flooded in, making him more than well aware of where he was. It all made sense now. The sound. It was beeping. The smell. It was antiseptic. He was in a hospital.

There were more noises now. They sounded more urgent and alarming, obviously bringing to the attention of someone that he had woken. Before his mind had a chance to process any of the information, a nurse was standing next to his bed. He closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief when he realized that hers was a familiar face.

"Gwen" he rasped. Ah, Guinevere Pendragon, wife of Arthur Pendragon, best friend of Morgana Pendragon, and a personal friend of Mordred's. Being married to Arthur, and how wealthy he was as CEO of his family's bank, Bank of Camelot, she didn't have to work at all, but she had insisted on it. She never was one to sit idle or shop all day, no matter how much Morgana wished that she would go shopping with her more often. Morgana herself had gotten far, finding herself in the public relations department of the massive company. Gwen had insisted that Mordred was far to reclusive for his own good and forcibly introduced him to Arthur and Morgana, with whom he was pleasantly surprised were actually nice company. The four had been friends ever since.

"Hello Mordred" she greeted softly, careful not to be too loud and hurt him, his ears still sensitive since he had only just woken.

He opened his eyes a little and was doing his best to keep them open. "What- What happened? What am I doing here?'

"You were in an accident." She told him gently.

Mordred did his best to smile. "I figured as much. What kind of accident?" he breathed out.

"A car accident. You were hit by a drunk driver."

Then it all came back to him. He was driving home from the store. He had been out of milk. He was so close, only four more blocks and he would have been home, but someone had slammed into his car. Then the blur came back. Metal. Pavement. Screaming. Pain.

"Am I gonna be alright?" he asked nonchalantly, fully expecting that he only had a few cuts and bruises, maybe a broken bone or two.

There was no reply and that worried him slightly. Perhaps she hadn't heard him.

"Gwen?"

Still no answer.

He tried to turn his head to look at her and find out what was going on, but found that he couldn't. A stiff plastic brace held his neck immobile. How hadn't he realized this earlier?

"Gwen?" He tried again, practically begging her for a response. He wanted to be told that this was all a prank. Gwen just wasn't answering because she would end up laughing if she did and that would ruin the joke. He didn't really need the brace. He was going to be just fine. Right? Wrong. He practically broke in half when Gwen walked forwards so that see him without moving his head and he saw the unshed tears in her eyes.

"Mordred, I'm sorry." She finally said.

"Sorry about what? What's going on? What's wrong with me? Why isn't anyone telling me anything?!" He shouted pleadingly. He was terrified. Absolutely terrified.

It wasn't long before a doctor, Dr. Ivory, entered the room and explained it to him. The impact of the other vehicle combined with the way he was thrown around caused severe damage to the lower lumbar region of his spinal column, or as Dr. Ivory had simplified for him, he had been paralyzed from the waist down. He wanted so desperately to believe that they were wrong, but now, he could feel it, or rather couldn't feel it. Dr. Ivory told him that he may regain some feeling and work with a physical therapist may further his recovery. It was too early in his recovery to tell, but no one knew if he would ever walk again.

Almost three hours later, Mordred's boyfriend, Valiant, arrived. Gwen did not like Valiant at all, Morgana said that she felt like he was bad news, and Arthur had only said to be careful, but he didn't pay much heed to their warnings. They had been together for a long while and he loved Valiant and was confident that Valiant loved him to. That was why he was confused as to why his boyfriend refused to hold his hand when he sat down in the chair next to his bed. The brace around his neck kept him from looking Valiant, but he had put his hand out in silent request for it to be held. A request that had been denied. Now, Mordred could never be considered a "needy" partner. He hardly ever asked for anything at all, only things he truly needed or wanted, which wasn't much. All he had been looking for was a little bit of comfort from his boyfriend but Valiant wasn't going to give him any. Mordred understood that his partner wasn't really one for public displays of affection, or any kind of physical affection at all really, but he had hoped that he could put that aside for him.

"Mordred" Valiant said seriously. Mordred stiffened. Valiant only used his full name when something was important, usually preferring nicknames like "M" or "Babe" (the second of which he very much disliked). "I heard about what happened, about your legs. How you can't feel anything below the waist. I know there's not much of a chance-"

"It's not completely hopeless." Mordred interrupted, sounding like he was trying to convince himself that more than anyone else. "The doctor says that I may regain some feeling on my own and if I work with a physical therapist, there's no telling how far I could get. We'll get through this together, I know we can."

"See, Mordred," Valiant began awkwardly, "you're right about it not being a completely lost cause and your right about getting back something. But you're not correct about the "we" part. I can't do this."

Any traces of the smile that was beginning to form on Mordred's face had been wiped away and replaced with a mix of hurt and confusion. "What are you saying?"

"Exactly what it sounds like. I can't run around after you playing nursemaid. I have a job and a life; you can't expect me to stop all of that just for you, can you?"

"No, I never did! You don't have to run around after me, I may need some help from time to time, but not always!" Mordred cried desperately. This could not be happening.

"Not always? Are you serious? You can't even use the bathroom on your own! I heard what the doctor said; you've lost everything down there! Bladder and bowel control, you'd have to wear a diaper and there is no way in hell I'm changing you!"

He wished he would stop. It may be like that for a little while but most certainly not for long. Dr. Ivory had said there was a good chance that he would get his bladder and bowl control back and over time he would learn how to do things for himself. He was already ashamed and upset, hearing Valiant, the one he loved, say these things felt like someone was driving rusty metal stakes into his chest.

"I'd be doing everything for you!"

Stake number one.

"Putting you to bed!"

Stake number two.

"Helping you bathe!"

Stake number three.

"And I bet you can't 'pitch your tent' anymore either!"

Stake number four.

"I swear Mordred, you are being so selfish!"

That was the final straw. You could practically hear the pieces fall as Mordred's heart shattered. He would have figured out how to bathe get to bed by himself in time. He was fully aware that he was unable to have sex, but had hoped that that would come back to him eventually. These were all things he would have to figure out. He hated being a burden on anyone. He would do the best that he could, but he couldn't help but see where Valiant was coming from. This would be impacting him too. While Mordred had hoped that Valiant had loved him enough to put him above some things, he was now truly thinking,…was he being selfish?

Burden. Selfish.

It was at that moment that those two words burned themselves into Mordred's mind and made him want to vomit.

"We've been together for almost two years. I love you, and I though you loved me too." Mordred whispered, not trusting his voice fully.

Valiant was done shouting and his voice had returned to it's 'matter of fact', almost stoic tone.

"Well I'm not sure if I do.

"I'm sorry it turned out like this Mordred. I'm sorry it had to happen like this, but I can't do this. I'm done." Valiant vanished without another word, leaving his now ex-boyfriend alone, scared, confused, heartbroken, and crying.

So... Whatcha guys think? Personally, I had a lot of fun writing this. No ofense Mordred, I only do it cuz I love ya! Just thought that this would put an interesting spin on this character. Anyway, see you next update, but for now,...This is RA88 signing off with a smile! :-)