It took me waaaaaaaay longer than it should to crank this abysmally short chapter out. Been lots of changes happening in my house/life lately which always seems to take a toll on my creative process. *sigh* The good news is, I am no longer working two jobs and 13 hour days (HOORAY) so I am really hoping that once my family and I get settled into our new routine it should be easier for me to get this story finished. Once again, I am sorry at how short this chapter is, but you all should know by now that I like to end a chapter with just the right amount of tension. Please, let me know what you think!

The car ride back to Clear Valley was…awkward. Jesse was far from being a stranger to the club scene and being around someone who was high wasn't new, but having never been on drugs himself he had no idea how to handle someone who was…

"Jesus, I'm still rolling so hard," Beca giggled in a breathy voice. "These seats feel amazing! The leather feels so soft. Do you have any Vicks Sticks?"

"…No," he deadpanned.

"Any menthol gum?"

"No."

"Any gum at all?"

"No."

"Can I turn the radio up?"

"No." Suddenly, Beca leaned over the console, bringing her face within inches of his. "Christ, Beca! What the hell are you doing?"

"God, what do you smell like? It's fucking awesome," Beca sighed. Jesse stared at her, flabbergasted.

"Uh...It's my cologne."

"I love that smell," she sighed, settling back into her seat. "I miss it." Jesse snuck glances at her from the corner of his eyes. Gone was the giggling and antsy shifting, Beca had pulled her knees to her chest and was trying to wipe the tears from her cheeks. Jesse was at a total and complete loss. He wasn't sure how to handle someone, much less Beca, who zipped from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other in mere seconds.

"Jesus, Beca, what the hell were you thinking?" Jesse asked softly.

"I just…wanted to forget," she sniffled, talking into her knees. "I wanted to feel happy for a while."

"This is you feeling happy?" he was incredulous. He looked over at her and watched as her cheeks puffed in indignation. She whipped her head back to look at him.

"I was perfectly happy until you pulled me out of there!" she shot back. Jesse couldn't roll his eyes hard enough.

"Do you even realize what those two people were doing to you while you were dancing?" he countered.

"They asked me if they could."

"Oh, well that changes things," he retorted. "I'm so glad they got your permission first. Good thing you weren't fucked up on drugs or you might have made a poor decision!"

"Jesus, Jesse. Relax. I've done this a whole bunch of times."

"You've done drugs before?" Jesse couldn't hide his incredulity. Beca shrugged, nodding her head.

"Extasy. I used to do it in college sometimes."

"I don't get it, Beca. Why?"

"Because it's fun. Because I wanted to. Because I just wanted to forget about you and everything else I've lost in my life...just for a little while."

"Jesus, Beca. Don't you think that's a bit dramatic?"

"What the hell do you know about anything?" Beca cried out, crossing her arms and glaring out the window. "You come waltzing back into town, turning everything in my and Jared's life upside down, and you don't give a second thought to what is going to happen to us when you leave again." Jesse looked over at her.

"This isn't easy for me, either, Beca," he said evenly, trying to keep his cool. "You think it was easy for me to come back here? You think it's been easy for me to see that my best friends have moved on and forgotten about me?"

"You were the one who forgot about us," she spat. "And you'll do the same thing again when you leave."

"Why do you just act like you expect the bottom to fall out with everything?"

"Because it always does, Jesse. It always does. I thought you wanted to be with me in high school and then you got back with Ava. And then you moved. I thought I'd always have my family but then my parents died. And then Gran died. when I thought I had escaped this town I had to come back because Jared needed me. And then, when I thought you and I had a chance to be together, Aubrey came swooping in and-"

"Beca, there is nothing between me and Aubrey." Beca stared at him disbelievingly.

"Aubrey told me about you kissing her." Jesse sighed heavily, taking his left hand off of the steering wheel and scratching the back of his head.

"I…There's no excuse for that," he said in a low voice. "I was stupid and fucking hammered and I thought she was you. I thought you…I wanted so badly for it to be you at my door and-"

"Yeah, she told me what happened." Jesse sighed in frustration, his temper and patience finally at the end of their limit. He removed his foot from the accelerator and pressed the brake, pulling off the road and onto the dirt shoulder. When the car finally stopped, he put the car in park and turned in his seat to face a thoroughly confused Beca. They were roughly thirty minutes from the city limits of Clear Valley, but Jesse couldn't wait that long to say what he needed to say. He just wished that Beca was sober, instead of…'Rolling so hard'.

"Beca, I need you to listen to me," he growled, staring hard at her in the green glow of his dashboard. "I kissed Aubrey because I was drunk out of my mind and I thought that she was you. I'm not saying it wasn't wrong, but I need you to understand why it happened. I feel like shit for doing it. If I could take it back, I would. There is nothing between me and Aubrey! There is never going to be anything between me and Aubrey."

"Stop," Beca cried, covering her face with her hands and shrinking back against the passenger door. "Just stop. Don't make me forgive you. Just let me get over you. I-"

"I can't do that," Jesse yelled.

"WHY NOT?" she yelled through her hands. "Why not?" Jesse watched as her body shook, her sniffles and quiet sobs lancing through his heart. He swallowed hard, taking a shuddering breath.

"Because I…," he raked his finger through his hair, willing his mouth to work, trying desperately to get his lips-his voice-to finally say the words he'd been holding onto for such a long time. "Because I…" He swallowed thickly, staring down at his lap. "Because I…I love you. I think I've loved you my whole life. Eleven years away from you and I can't find anyone who drives me half as crazy as you do. And believe me, I tried. I tried to find someone, some thing to fill this nothingness in me when I'm not around you, and I couldn't do it. I'm in love with you, Rebeca!"

Jesse slowly lifted his gaze back to Beca. Her hands were still, poised between covering her face from Jesse and falling into her lap. Her cheeks were wet from her tears and her eyes were wide from shock. But her mouth, the thing Jesse desperately needed to be working and giving some sort of reaction-and fucking reaction at all-was frozen and silent.

"Beca," Jesse spoke, his voice breaking. "Please…I need you to say something."