Chapter Three: Morton Koopa Jr.

Mario hung up his coat on the bar's coat rack and headed for the counter. He just needed a small drink before he investigated upriver.

"Mystery Drink please." Mario told the bartender Podley as he sat down. He was the only one in besides Diddy Kong who was crying silently about something nearby and Koopa who was staring unevenly at a nearby wall. Buncha weirdoes,Mario thought a bit rudely.

Diddy Kong was an enigma, one of Donkey Kong's friends who had showed up at a golf tournament one day and had stuck around like a pest ever since. The monkey had the patience, resolve, and mind of a child, and yet the age to drink with other adults in an establishment.

Koopa was even stranger; a regular koopa who had taken it upon himself to represent the koopa species and had officially changed his name to achieve his goal. Someone had misprinted Bowser's invitation to the first Mario Kart Tournament, and Koopa had taken the Party Committee to court claiming that the papers from then on were legally inviting him. Koopa won the case and had since then remained something of an annoyance to some of the other Kart participants— as someone who had forced his way in rather than receive a "real" invitation.

Mario really didn't care. Koopa seemed like a nice enough guy even if his views on Mario seemed to flip one way or the other every single day.

"WHERE IS HE?!" Diddy Kong suddenly screeched just as Mario took hold of his drink. The sound surprised him and he spilled all over the wooden counter, one angle away from staining his overalls.

"What the hell's ya problem?" Mario spat, his old accent creeping in during his anger. …Old accent?

"Don't start with me!" Diddy bawled. "Donkey's gone missing, and, and…" He chugged down the rest of his drink wildly, his crooked cap almost falling off as he threw his head back.

Donkey Kong was a pathetic criminal, just as the rest of his family had been. Mario had fought once with his grandfather, Cranky Kong, over an old girlfriend, as well as DK's father when Mario had captured Cranky Kong in a cage. Confusingly enough, Cranky Kong had called himself Donkey Kong at one point and the current Donkey Kong's father had always called himself Donkey Kong Jr. Mario supposed that the creature still did, wherever he was.

To summarize the Kong family tree: Cranky Kong - Donkey Kong Jr. - Donkey Kong

Donkey Kong himself was known for being a nuisance at parties and constantly trying to rob Mario's mini-toy company for god knows what reason. Based on some past experiences Mario had concluded that Donkey Kong was obsessed with toys and other contrapments.

"Stupid kid…" Mario growled to himself. He glanced down at his spilled drink with some embarrassment. "Sorry Podley, I…"

"It's alright, Mario." Podley said with the same hint of comforting wisdom in his voice as usual. "No charge for your next drink. I heard you're trying to solve these new murders that are going around."

Damn, Podley learns things fast. Mario thought soberly. He always was a rumor mill, wasn't he? "Yeah, it's true. A real mess."

"Hmmm…" Podley leaned down near Mario. "Actually, I heard something interesting about Koopa's death…" Iggy Koopa…

"Oh GOD!" Diddy Kong shrieked wildly, throwing his mug against the wall and scampering out. The glass shattered against the wall near Koopa who was now reading a newspaper. He didn't react at all.

Podley sighed long and low before continuing. "Word has it that Larry Koopa was meeting with someone here in Toad Town three days before he was found dead."

"Yeah?" Mario pressed forward with interest.

"They say he was meeting with Princess Daisy, just walking through town and talking." Podley backed away and spoke in a normal tone again. "I don't know what it means, though…"

Mario felt that what he had just been told was definitely a big clue. "Thanks, Podley." Mario said as thankfully as he could.

"No problem, Mario." Podley served another drink before going to clean up the shattered glass on the floor. "Always glad to help you."

An hour later and back in the misty outside, Mario happened to run into Bowser who was making his way down the street accompanied by five of his children: Wendy, Roy, Lemmy, Ludwig, and Bowser Jr. While Bowser was keeping solemn and dignified, each of his children had broken down and were crying— even Ludwig.

"Hmph. Good afternoon, Mario." Bowser said gruffly. Slight shifts in his eyes betrayed the agony he was hiding.

"Good afternoon, Bowser." Mario replied, unsure of how to move forward. The truth was, he felt sadder for the Koopa King then he did for Princess Daisy. He and Bowser almost had a secret friendship by this point, he felt. As much as that meant, in this increasingly cardboard world.

"Where is he?" Bowser drove straight to the point. Mario admired his bravery, even in the face of his child's death.

"Down by the river. There was a fair set up…you should still be able to see some of the tents." Mario pointed.

"Alright." Bowser nodded and moved ahead, his children following after. Mario wondered where Bowser's other living children were: Larry, Morton, and Bowser Jr.

He'll probably burst into tears once he reaches the site, Mario thought tepidly. Unless he's feeling like I am.

Mario shivered and moved ahead. Then again, I don't have children. I don't really know what kind of feelings a death like that would bring. Would I be happier if I had kids? Little tots to bounce on my knees…

The idea sounded vaguely nice, but not enough to propose marriage to Peach. He had always felt some internal chasm preventing him from going anywhere beyond a kiss. It used to tear him up inside, drive him mad… but now he was used to it. This was just the way things were. The way things had always been. Unchanging.

Mario shivered and stuck his hand into his pocket to keep a little warmer. His gloves brushed up against something thin and crispy. His imagination raced but when he had removed his hand from his pocket he found that it was just a slip of paper, torn away and messily scratched on with pencil.

XMortOn Koopa JR. is alreaDy deadX

AN: The Donkey Kong family tree is not some over-complicated stuff I'm making up, it's pretty much official. You can learn more at the Super Mario Wiki.