Havoc and Splashes

Ugh this again. Whatever, Let's Go.

Part Five: Ready to Wreak Havoc Forever!

I wobbled a bit as I got on the shoulders of my partner; he was really, really tall. He was so tall when he lifted me my braids were barely touching the water. His hands could have crushed my calves if he wanted to, but he kept his eyes on the Demacian dude in front of him. Oh yeah, and Fathands, she was staring right at me.

Across from us the idiot duo of Fathands and that dumb Demacian. Both stretched and popped their knuckles while they stared at us like the snobs they are. What I want to know is how is he holding her fat ass up? She looks like she weighs like a ton. Also can he hear anything with those fat thighs wrapped around his ears? I wondered if I had yelled "Demacia sucks" would he have heard me.

"Hey…" the Noxian grumbled while tugging on my leg, "You look significantly weaker compared to Vi. So I suggest we just dodge her blows and hopefully she slips into the—"

"Hey man," I loosely said, "Cool it. I know just the plan!" To be honest, I didn't. But come on, if I'm able to blow up banks and the coffee shops the dim-witted duo of Hat Lady and Fathands always went to then I am capable of anything. That reminds me, I should blow up all the donut shops too just to piss them off more.

"…Fine, but if we lose I won't hesitate to crush you. Being defeated by that Demacian in front of all these people would be a disgrace to all of Noxus and—"

"Just get close to Fathands and I'll do the rest."

"Come on ladies! I don't have all day!" Fathands called. A few of the onlookers snickered along with her and Garen. Ew, that's when I noticed her boobs jiggled when she laughed. Why the hell is she wearing such a tight bikini? It looked like she was going to bust right out of it—that's when it hit me.

"Oh, I understand." I said, "I know you and your woman have to rub oil all over each other later." I sneered while I rubbed my stomach and chest.

"You do?" Garen asked with a blushing face.

"N-no!" Fathands growled down at him, "Look just make a move already, criminal!"

"Good luck, Vi." Hat Lady called from the poolside. I noticed a smile crawl over Fathands' fat face and she waved a fat hand at her.

"Alright Fathands let me push you in the pool so your girlfriend can towel dry you." I noticed that Fathands face was as red as a tomato.

"She's not my girlfriend! Garen go!"

"Chaaaarge!" He let out a battle cry. Then that's when the whole pool started cheering.

The dumb guy came charging at us like a big bull… with another fat bull on its shoulders. That's when my guy went charging in as well. He was going so fast that I had to hold on to his hair—isn't water supposed to like slow you down or whatever, that's what I saw written on that smart yordle's board after I spray painted his lab.

The crowd was roaring as Garen and Darius locked hands and Fathands tried pushing me off Darius' shoulders, but I caught her wrists. I didn't think that Fathands would use her weight to push me slowly and her partner started splashing water on me—they were trying to get me to slip but my guy quickly grabbed my ankles.

"Come on and slip already!" Fathands growled. There it was—I could see this moron's bikini string hanging just over her shoulder. She made this too easy for me… then again anything is easy when you have two idiots sucking face instead of paying attention to me.

"In your dreams Fathands!" I snickered, "You left yourself wide open for my sneak attack."

"What the hell are you talking about, you crazy—"

With a swift strike, I grabbed the yellow string between my fingers and yanked as hard as I could. I heard a symphony of gasps and whistles as Fathand's bikini top slowly fell—sadly she caught it, but now was my chance to shove her. I grabbed her fat shoulders and she stared at me wide-eyed as she held her boobs from falling out of top. I stuck my tongue out at her and pushed her with all my might.

I heard a loud splash.

"Ladies, Gentlemen, and others… I give you your winners… Jinx and Darius!" Renekton shouted into her microphone and the whole poolside cheered. The Noxian lifted me up to the get on the dry surface and I heard Ziggs hysterically laughing as he ran over to me.

"Jinx, you did it!" He applauded.

"Ahh, it was nothing." I sighed contently while I looked on to Fathands chocking on water and retied her top behind her neck. Of course Hat Lady ran over to the poolside and rubbed her back—it was gross.

"Renekton! She can't do that!" Hat Lady complained as she ran over to the big crocodile's tower. As she ran a couple of the other champions booed her while she passed them—it was great other people disliked her almost as much as me. I could see Renekton roll his eyes as he leaned over to listen to the annoying woman. "Jinx pulled on Vi's bikini top! That is against the rules, isn't it?"

"I understand why you think that… but I said anything that caused physical harm was against the rules." He growled as he sat back in his chair and pretended to look at his whistle. Hat Lady pinched her nose in annoyance as the champions that booed her cheered the croc's name. "Alright, now we can get back to the diving contest!"

It was a really great day—I wish you would have been there, Fishbones. Huh? Who won the diving contest? Well Darius won but he gave his free passes to that restaurant to Ziggs and me—for a Noxian he is a pretty cool guy. Ziggs and I are going together next week.

After that the day was a little slow, but I was already pooped from causing mayhem. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that Hat Lady had an allergic reaction to one of the lounge chairs—turns out that someone spilt their sunscreen all over it. Also there was a lot of yelling by the snack bar when that Demacian chick with the bird and that guy with the really long arm blade were seen holding hands.

The End.

That's the end, Fishbones; time to go onto the side story.

Riven vs Yasuo! Part 5!

The beach was totally empty when Riven touched the sands—even the ninjas were gone, they were probably enjoying whatever was happening near the pool. Graves said that he saw Yasuo wandering towards the beach, but the Exile saw nothing. She began walking slowly.

Where could he be? This is such a large stretch of sand—he could be anywhere. Thought Riven, I must have angered him with what I said. Wait… me angering him? After he tossed my towel in the pool and threw balloons at me and Ahri? No, no. If anything he angered me. I should just turn around and—

Suddenly the soft sounds of a wind instrument began fluttering down the beach. The Exile followed without any idea why—it just called for her. She stopped by a few large boulders that sat on the sand's edge. Riven walked around and saw that the samurai was playing the beautiful music. He stopped when he sensed her staring at him.

"Riven?"

"You play beautifully." The Exile smiled shyly.

"Oh? This old thing?" Yasuo looked down at his flute and blushed. He patted the flat side of the rock next to him and Riven sat beside him. Their hands rested close to the others, fingers twitched, and palms became sweaty. It was fairly quiet between the two while the waves crashed near their feet. A group of crabs snapped their claws around them as if to tell them to get on with it.

"I'm sorry for—" They both blurted to one another. Riven covered her mouth and Yasuo chuckled at her.

"You go first." Riven whispered from behind her hand.

"Sorry for making your day miserable and for the record I don't hate you." Yasuo sighed while he placed his flute back on his pocket.

"Same here, I apologize for pouring sand in your sake." Riven's cheeks dusted pink, "And I don't hate you either—in fact I kind of like you." The Exile giggled when she saw the samurai's hair start to stand. Yasuo seized Riven's hand and suddenly she stopped giggling. Both of their faces were bright red while they stared at each other intently.

"I like you too, Riven!" Yasuo shouted, although he didn't intent to but his heart was beating so loudly he couldn't hear himself. "A lot actually! When I first saw you I thought you were the most beautiful woman in the whole world. I only did all that shitty stuff because I didn't know what to say to you."

"Yasuo—" Riven's words were blocked by the samurai's lips. They were tight, nervous, and left as soon as they came. Riven's eyes fluttered as her vision blurred. Yasuo sat there watching as she tried to grasp what had just happened—actually he didn't know himself. She glanced down at her hands laced between the samurai's. "So throwing cold water balloons at me was a way to start a conversation?"

"I worked, didn't it? And believe me it wasn't to see through your top." Yasuo smirked, "Although that was a plus." Riven smacked the samurai on his bandaged shoulder and he yelped loud enough for the crabs around them to scatter.

"What do you say to getting a few hotdogs from Pantheon?" The Exile asked while rubbing the top of his hand apologetically.

"I'll buy."

The End.

That's the end, Fishbones; time for the next story.