Harry Potter And The Drarry Clichés

Summary: All the most popular Drarry tropes compiled in one place. Including Veela, rentboy, jealousy and more!

Warnings: Crack

Author's Note: Clichés are used in almost every fic. Now here is a stereotypical compilation of all of them.

Cliché One—Veela

Harry sat in Dumbledore's office—actually Professor McGonagall's office now but Harry couldn't get out of the habit of calling it Dumbledore's—squirming anxiously in his seat. What exactly did Headmistress McGonagall want from him now? Wasn't it enough that Harry had defeated Voldemort just five months prior?

Harry had returned back to Hogwarts for his Eighth Year, an extra year designated to the previous year's Seventh so that they could catch up on their studies and take their NEWTs, reluctantly. Honestly, he could have immediately gone to Auror training if he so desired—Kingsley had pronounced that all students who fought in the Battle of Hogwarts would be granted a spot regardless if they had the proper credentials or not—and Harry probably would have if not for the fact that he no longer wished to be an Auror. After the war and spending about a year on the run to find a way to defeat Voldemort, after all the deaths he had seen—no. Harry didn't think he could bear being an Auror after all that.

So here he was. But Headmistress McGonagall had sent for him and now, as every second ticked away with no one in sight, Harry was getting nervous.

"It had to be Potter, of course it had to be," the arrogant voice broke the unsettling silence.

"Please refrain from antagonizing, Mr Malfoy. He is after all your son's—" Harry couldn't hear the rest of the sentence but there was already a bad feeling bubbling in the pit of his stomach. This could not be good. Especially not with Malfoys involved.

The door to the office opened and in came Headmistress McGonagall—gosh Harry could never get used to calling her that—followed by Draco Malfoy and Lucius Malfoy.

Harry shivered when Draco's eyes landed on him. There was a glint in his eyes that looked hungry—predatory. And if that wasn't unsettling then Harry didn't what was.

Malfoy and him hadn't parted on good or hostile terms. The last time Harry had conversed with him was on the day of the Malfoy trials, when Malfoy had actually thanked Harry for defending him. And after that, they had an unsaid, tentative truce since the start of Eighth Year.

It seems the truce might be ending, Harry thought sorrowfully. The way they were all gathered in the Headmaster's office, and the serious looks on their faces were evidence to the fact.

Harry didn't want to beat around the bush. He asked as soon as all of them took notice of him, "What's going on, Professor McGonagall?"

He was answered as bluntly. "Mr Potter. Do you know anything about Veela?"

There seemed to be sadness behind her voice though the source of it, Harry couldn't place. Harry nodded his head.

"I learnt about them in Fourth Year," he confirmed. "They're some sort of bird-like creatures, aren't they?"

McGonagall bit her lip in a gesture that was quite out of place on her usually stern face. "That's the tip of it, yes. But there's more.

"I'll be blunt with you, Harry. Malfoy here," she pointed to Draco, whose staring hasn't ceased and was causing Harry to feel more and more uncomfortable, "is a Veela. And you're his mate."

Oh damn. That wasn't what I was expecting.

"What?!" Harry exclaimed. "Are there even such things as male Veela in the first place? And since when did Veela have mates."

"Well, Potter," Lucius Malfoy spoke with contempt. "There are certainly such things as male Veela. And they do have mates. The problem is that my son's mate seems to be you."

"Can't he just choose someone else?" Harry wondered aloud, determinedly looking away from Draco's intent gaze. "I mean, why not? Veela have got to be able to choose their own mates."

At that, a loud screech came out of Malfoy, and Harry's hands flew instinctively to his ears.

"What the hell, Malfoy?" Harry complained. "What was that for?"

"Mate! Mine." Malfoy cried out and he slammed into Harry in a blink of his eye, pulling him in such a tight embrace that Harry was surprised he could still breathe.

"Let go of me!"

Harry looked pleadingly at the other two people in the room, asking them mentally to help him. Lucius just had a pleased look on his face while Professor McGonagall sighed.

"You are his mate, Mr Potter. There's no other choice. He can't choose anyone else. If you reject him then I fear that he would die."

The word die echoed in Harry's mind and he halted in his struggling.

Oh no.

"There's no other choice?" Harry whispered resignedly, his shoulders slack. Draco was now sniffing his hair—Merlin, did being a Veela deprive you of all humanity or something? Malfoy was acting like a feral animal—and Harry knew he couldn't possibly reject Malfoy and leave him to die, even if he didn't particularly like the prat.

Stupid hero complex, he cursed in his mind.

"Fine," Harry stated.

"If it makes things any better," McGonagall added, "Veela and their mates share special bonds. Your love would be triumphant in the end."

What love? Harry thought miserably. There's no love between Malfoy and me.

"Whatever."

"Great!" Lucius clapped his hand in a manner that Harry thought was most unbefitting of a Malfoy of any kind. "The wedding shall be held tomorrow, you shall seal your bond after that and by next year you shall bear me my grandchildren."

Harry was momentarily stunned by the news—how the bloody hell could males get pregnant—before going back to not caring. Harry didn't want to care anymore.

"Whatever," he repeated.

"My mate," Draco said in a possessive tone. "You're mine now."

Usually Harry would hate someone thinking of him as some sort of possession but now, those words seemed to calm him in a way.

Maybe having a Veela as a mate and having someone love me unconditionally won't be too bad after all. I've always wanted a family that would love me anyway. Why not the Malfoys? I'll just disregard all the previous years of them either tormenting me or trying to end my life. Shouldn't be too hard.

"Fine." Harry said, relaxing in Draco's hold.

An amusing thought then popped into his brain.

Oh Ron is going to have a cow when he hears about this.

Reply to Confused (Guest):

This is not a story with a storyline. This is just a collection of unrelated one-shots. I hope that helps! ^-^/