Disclaimer; I don't own The Vampire Diaries.

A/N: Are Damon and Bonnie probably going to stay dead very long? No, but this is a story in which their deaths are more permanent.

He felt the sharp sting of the alcohol as he swallows and revels in it. It is the only thing that dulls the pain. He looks at his sister who is on her second or third bottle of the day, he isn't sure which. Elena as a vampire has to drink a lot more to get the same amount of buzz he has. Really it's a testament to how lost and broken Elena is that she is no longer trying to be the parent, and doesn't care that Jeremy is right next to her, trying to beat her at the game of who can get more drunk. Perhaps since Alaric's back she feels like he can be the parent now, or maybe she just doesn't care anymore.

It doesn't matter to him either. He drinks another gulp of the foul liquid that takes the pain away. The pain of having lost yet another girlfriend. He must be cursed to lose every single one to death. Bonnie twice. Vicky had been swallowed as well and they were now not only dead, but they had ceased to exist as well.

He shot a look at Elena whose hair was uncombed and messy. His was probably not any better but he hadn't looked into a mirror in awhile and he didn't intend to. Sometimes he was angry at Elena for knowingly dating a vampire and getting them tangled up in this crap. Of course at the same time he knew that the anger was stupid. Not only was Elena a doppelganger but they were part of a family with a legacy of stopping vampires. Even if Elena had never dated either Salvatore brother they still probably would have been entangled in the chaos that was vampires.

His thoughts only rested on Elena for a moment before they were back to Bonnie. She was gone ,again. Not just on the other side but gone. He would never see her again, or Jenna, or Vicky, or Anna. But mostly what he cared about at the moment was Bonnie. He had loved her so much. It hurt. Jeremy took another large gulp of alcohol, taking a little too much that it caught in his throat and made him cough a little. Jeremy didn't stop though before he drunk again.

Everything seemed pointless now. He lived in a town full of vampires and his chance of making it graduation alive was only 50 /50. Although, even that was perhaps optimistic since he had already been dead. His parents were dead, his third girlfriend was dead and even Elena was technically dead. Jeremy had finally learned the pattern. Gilbert's must be cursed. Elena had lost almost everyone she loved and so had he. It was better to stay here that way he couldn't get close to anyone else and kill them too.

Jeremy found himself looking towards the door. Sooner or later Alaric was going to show up take the alcohol away and try to get them sober. It won't work. Jeremy stashed several bottles around the house and he knows some of Elena's hiding spots as well. Alaric can try all he wants but after everything they've lost he's not sure either he or Elena wants to be saved.

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