Hello all! I just wish to let you know that I am revising the First book of the Greenwood Trilogy. Some of you will have noticed the revision tags on the chapters and will ignore this, others will not have seen them (since I hadn't fixed them yet). So far, only a few of the chapters are completely revised, but I am working quickly and diligently on them. I would advise you to go back and check them, for they will help your understanding of the next two books. Thank you!

It's been nearly a month since the eagles rescued us from Azog the Defiler, and we have travelled nearly a quarter of the distance from the Carrock to the Lonely Mountain. My ankle has healed, and most of the blood I lost after being flogged by the "Great Goblin" in the caves of the Misty Mountains has returned, so that I am not dizzy and lightheaded all the time anymore. The lashes I received have long since scabbed over and are, thanks to Oin's healing skills and the Athelas I found along the way, now nearly all scars, although some scabs remain.

I have grown much closer to the company since Thorin's acceptance of me, and have especially grown closer to the king and to his nephews.

In the last month, I have come to realize that… that I have developed feelings for Kili. Feelings that I should only feel towards a mate: a husband. Feelings that I must ignore for the sake of my promise: to protect the line of Durin. I know as well as anyone that love—if my feelings can be called that—can mess up even the most elaborate and foolproof plan imaginable, and I will not allow my feelings to endanger the lives of the King and his kin.

"Aeyera," Thorin called. I looked up, breaking out of my thoughts, and looked him in the eye. We stood at the same height; he and nephews all were exceptionally tall for dwarves, and I was exceptionally small for an elf. However, the fact that neither of us had a distinct height advantage over the other seemed to heighten his respect for me for whatever reason, and he did not often bring it up. "Take Bilbo and go up the ridge; make sure the orcs haven't caught up to us. You're the smallest and lightest of us; if anyone else went, they'd hear and pick up our trail."

I was slightly affronted at the "you're the smallest" comment but chose to ignore it since he was correct; if any other member of the company tried to scout out the location of an orc pack, the pack would hear them coming from a mile away and we would all be dead. I nodded, looking him in the eye. "Be right back," I said, flipping backwards and landing in a tree with barely a rustle. I grinned and looked down at their stunned faces, nearly laughing at their expressions. "Come on, Bilbo," I whispered, leaping to a neighboring tree.

Since I was an elf and had excellent hearing, I was able to hear Kili as he whispered to his brother, and I was able to hear Fili's quick response. The brothers had moved to the edge of the group and a bit away from the bulk of dwarves; no one without the ears of an elf could have heard them. "She's different… a good different," the former whispered longingly to his elder brother. "She's beautiful."

The latter responded sharply, his voice low. "She is not yours, brother. She never will be; she is an elfling, you are a dwarf prince."

"She's a princess too," he argued. I stayed in my perch, silent, as Bilbo looked around for me, confused but unwilling to call my name in case someone unwelcome might hear his cry. The other dwarves were hidden from sight by the foliage, and I was sure they thought I was long gone by now.

"But she still is an elf. And even if uncle thought it alright for you to court her—which he doesn't—it would not be acceptable."

His hesitant reply reached my ears and made my heart crack. "She could pass for a dwarf…" Kili suggested softly. I looked down. Never good enough for anyone.

"No she couldn't, Kee," Fili said softly. "She's my friend as well as yours, brother, but… even if she had feelings for you, the two of you could never be together. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too," I whispered, looking down. A tear fell from my eye as I leaped down and landed in a crouch next to Bilbo, who had nearly given up hope of ever finding me.

He jumped, startled. "Princess!" He yelped. I heard as rustle and looked up, meeting the blue eyes of Thorin's eldest nephew. They widened at the side of my red-rimmed eyes and the tear on my face and I immediately looked away, wiping the tear off my cheek.

"Let's go, Bilbo," I said quietly, my voice slightly choked up.

He followed hesitantly behind me, playing with his fingers. "Are you alright, Aeyera?" he asked, watching me carefully as I picked up the pace. "You seem upset…"

I smiled sadly, looking out at the setting sun and listening for any sound of danger. "I'm alright, Bilbo," I replied softly. "I'm just… homesick is all."

Sick of not having a home, more like, since I don't have one anyway, I thought.

He looked doubtful but accepted my answer all the same. "Oh… alright," he said, moving quickly to match my longer strides as we neared the edge of a precipice. "Where are we going?"

I shook my head and gestured to a point several miles away, all the while keeping my pointer finger pressed against my lips. I crouched down low to the ground as Bilbo looked at what I had pointed to: the orc pack. He gasped and fell down to my level, breathing heavily. I looked around scouting out any other nearby threats. My heart stopped at what I saw. "They're quite close," he whispered, his voice shaking. "Should we warn the others?"

His voice was distant, and I mutely nodded as I stared at the beast behind him, which had not yet spotted us. It was like a bear but was much, much larger, and its muzzle was pulled back in a snarl. Its yellow gaze was locked on the orc pack, and I was terrified that its gaze would fall on Bilbo and I. I knew this creature: his human form was a dear friend of mine who went by the name of Beorn. However, his animal form was unpredictable—a beast to be reckoned with, and I had no desire to meet him in a fight.

"Princess?" Bilbo was asking, his voice a whisper. I snapped back to myself and leaned forward, covering his mouth with my hand and pulling him away. As I pulled, keeping my hand firmly over his mouth, he spotted Beorn, and his face turned white. He turned and bolted, leaving me behind, and I looked once more over to the ridge where the orc pack had been. They now were galloping down the mountain, and although they hadn't seen us, I had a feeling that they'd picked up our scent.

I turned and ran, following after the halfling and making no more noise than a gentle breeze that makes its way through leaves on warm summer nights. When I reached the Company, Bilbo was already in their midst, and I made a point to avoid the gaze of Fili, whom I assumed would be having words with me later on.

"I'm trying to tell you that there's something else out there," Bilbo was saying, trying to capture the attention of the thirteen dwarves. They all turned to him, startled, but Gandalf was the first to speak up.

"What form did it take?" he asked. "Was it that of a bear?"

"Yes, Gandalf," I said, stepping forward and cutting off Bilbo's stammering reply. "But we need to go now."

His bright eyes narrowed slightly as he looked me over, frowning. "What happened to you?" he asked quietly. The dwarves looked from me to the wizard, confused and anxious. I myself was somewhat confused, wondering if he referred to my missing years, my red-rimmed eyes, or my short temper. A growl reached my ears, and though it was faint and far away—even with my hearing it was barely audible—I jumped, startled. Gandalf took this into account and turned to the others, dismissing his curiosity for the moment. I twisted my brother's ring nervously, watching the wizard carefully.

"There is a house," Gandalf said, looking around at all the dwarves. "It's not far from here, where we might take refuge."

"Whose house?" Thorin asked, wary of the wizard's ideas since the eagles snatched his company off the side of a mountain. "Is he friend or foe?"

"Neither," the wizard answered. "He will help us, or he will kill us."

"What choice do we have?" Thorin asked, his face filled with doubt as I moved over to Gandalf's side.

"None," the wizard answered. I placed my hand on his shoulder, pulling him down a bit, and stood on my tiptoes so that I could whisper in his ear. The other dwarves slowly began to move in the direction Gandalf had indicated, giving me searching looks. "Mithrandir… are you sure this is the right choice? He is not a friend of dwarves."

"Nor is he normally a friend to elves. You have met him?" Gandalf asked, surprised. He frowned suddenly, his eyes going to the scars visible on my shoulder and neck. "How?"

A roar suddenly split the air, making everyone in the group jump and begin to run, leaving all questions for a later date. We began sprinting down the hill and charging through woods, crashing through the undergrowth with no thought of stealth. Not for the first time I considered circling around and taking out the orcs as they approached from behind—I certainly was fast enough—but I decided against it. We were close to Dol Guldur, too close, and I had no desire to be captured again.

Kili suddenly tripped in front of me, face planting, and I skidded, trying to come to a stop. However, he was too close to me and I was moving too quickly, I tripped over him, landing hard on the ground several feet away and cursing when my ankle twisted under me. I scrambled to my feet and pulled the blushing dwarf to his, pulling him along with me, my limp much more prominent than before.

"Hurry, Kili," I said, looking over my shoulder. My eyes widened at the sight of Beorn—as a bear—charging through the undergrowth, no more than half a mile behind us. "Let's go!" I yelled, pulling him forward and running with renewed strength. For the first time in the entire journey with the company I was physically able to run without any serious injuries or impediments, and I was unable to do so because of my promise to protect the line of Durin. 'Also the fact that you're in love with Thorin's nephew,' a snide voice in my head said, 'that's a key factor in explaining why you're risking your life by not leaving him behind.'

"Shut up," I panted, pulling Kili harder as we made our way across a wide stream.

"I didn't say anything," Kili grunted as I lost my footing, rolling my bad ankle on a loose stone. I cried out and would had fallen into the river had Kili not paused and pulled me back, unintentionally pulling me flush against his chest. I glanced up, catching the concerned and embarrassed look in his eye.

I pulled away, blushing. "Thank you," I said, regaining my footing and continuing on, lost in my thoughts.

-o-

'Thank Seldarine he's tall for a dwarf,' I thought as we continued to run side by side. He was keeping up with me astoundingly well… in fact, he seemed to be holding back. I tried bursting into a sprint, and he kept up easily, much to my relief. Chancing another glance back did nothing to boost my spirits—the distance between us and the bear had decreased to a quarter of a mile.

"What is it?" Kili asked, breathing heavily as we broke out of the woods and began flying across a golden field speckled with purple alfalfa and a few other scraggly, brown plants.

"Come on!" The wizard yelled, waving his staff around. I jumped over a trench, staggering slightly as pain flared up in my ankle upon landing. I gritted my teeth and continued on, my pain visible to the others' eyes by only a slight limp.

"What is what?" I asked, only slightly out of breath. I looked over at the handsome dwarf; his long, dark hair mostly pulled back from his face by a single silver clip; his dark eyes narrowed in concentration as he ran. Sweat ran down his face, and a vein stood out in his neck; his teeth were clenched against a cramp in his side.

"The bear—what is it?" he asked, throwing his arms in front of his face as we entered another forest, this one less dense than the first but thick enough that hopefully the bear would be impeded by its size and the closeness of the trees. I looked back and was relieved that I could not see the bear. I ran into someone and fell back into Kili's arms for the second time that day; I looked up into Dwalin's scowling face and stepped away from him, smiling nervously. I hadn't realized that the company had halted, and they stood close together, looking around for any sign of the bear or the orcs.

"Sorry," I said, looking around. Catching sight of Thorin and Fili, I felt partially relieved. At least they hadn't fallen behind.

Suddenly the bear's roar sounded again, much, much closer than before; it echoed around us, and Gandalf began running again, shouting for us to follow him. We needed no encouragement and began sprinting after him, fearful for our lives. Bombur stood, petrified, staring in the direction of the bear and I grabbed the first thing I could reach—his looped, braided beard—and pulled him along. "Come on!" I yelled, my voice barely able to be heard over the bear's continuous roar. The rotund dwarf ran next to me, surprisingly quick, and the brothers Fili and Kili ran in front of me. We continued down the wooded hill and leaped over a ditch at the bottom, coming in view of the house several hundred yards away.

"To the house!" the wizard yelled, as if he hadn't told us before that it was our only option. Bombur had run ahead of me and I had fallen behind, the pain in my ankle reaching an almost unbearable point. I yelled in frustration, forcing it to work, and I felt a hand on my elbow, pushing me forward. Startled, I looked up into the eyes of Thorin, who had been waiting at the back of the train of dwarves to assist any who fell behind.

He quickly assessed the damage and I saw a flash of guilt in his eyes—it was, after all, through defending him that I was wounded—and he spoke, pulling my arm around him shoulder. "Lean on me," he said. I nodded, in too much pain to argue.

"Run!" Gandalf yelled. The first of the company was yards away from the hedge surrounding the house, and Bombur raced ahead of every dwarf till he was the first in line, running faster even than Gandalf, who stopped at the gate to usher us all inside.

Bombur hit the door and bounced off as the next dwarves reached him; they began pounding at it, but it was unyielding. Not one noticed the latch above their heads. Thorin and I were the last to make it in, right behind Oin, and Gandalf ran up, yelling, "Open the door!"

"Quickly!" Thorin yelled, passing me to his nephews and pushing through the crowd, undoing the latch and pushing open the double doors. We burst through them, and the instant we all were in we turned and shut the doors—on the bear's muzzle.

The bear roared roared as the dwarves yelled, trying to close the remaining door. The muzzle was stuck between the closed door and the open one, and the only options were to allow the bear into the house—not really an option—or get the door shut, which didn't seem to be working. Something that didn't help to calm my frayed nerves was that Kili was closest to the bear's teeth, each one of which was as long as my knives. I glanced back to the wizard—who wasn't helping and was standing in the middle of the room, smirking— and Bilbo, who had drawn his elvish sword and was pointing it at the bear. Right as I glanced back at Kili, the bear moved to clamp his jaws down on his arm. With a yell, I tackled him to the ground as the bear's teeth snapped together with a resounding click, and he looked over at me with wide eyes.

"You saved me," he whispered, looking up into my eyes. I was on his chest, and he lay on the ground under me, and no one seemed to notice; they were to busy fighting Beorn. With roars to match that of the bear's, the dwarves managed to shut the door, sliding a thick plank of wood into its metal latches to hold the doors closed.

As soon as they were safe, the dwarves breathed sighs of relief and leaned against the wood, breathing heavily. Fili and Thorin helped Kili and I to our feet, Fili murmuring thanks as I leaned heavily on his shoulders. Ori turned around to look at the wizard who stood with his staff pointed at the door, a dazed and guarded look on his face. "What is that?"

Gandalf looked down at the dwarf, though he did not lower his staff. "That is our host." I stood in between Fili, who had taken up the task of keeping me from falling over, and Kili. Both turned around to stare incredulously at Gandalf, and the rest of the dwarves did the same. I was the only one in the room, save Gandalf, who knew the identity of our host, and yet even I was more than a little bit irritated at behind forced to run several miles on an injured ankle while being chased by a giant bear. "His name is Beorn," he said, looking around at the dumbfounded hobbit and dwarves surrounding him. "And he is a Skin-changer." He turned and strode away past Oin, who pulled his ear trumpet away and observed it carefully as if it were broken. It was—a goblin had crushed it in Goblin Town—but he still heard the wizard correctly. "Sometimes he's a huge black bear," he continued, moving past us through his house and past several large animals residing comfortably inside, "Sometimes he's a great, strong man. The bear is unpredictable, but the man can be reasoned with," Gandalf explained as the dwarves spread out, looking around. "However," the wizard warned, "He is not over fond of dwarves."

I had stayed near the doors with Fili and Kili, and I looked over as Ori pressed his ear against the door, listening for any sounds of the bear. "He's leavin'," he said, eyes wide.

His brother Dori pulled him away. "Come away from there," he scolded, keeping a firm grip on his arm as if his brother might be sucked through the door if he let go. "It's not natural, none of it! It's obvious: he's under some dark spell," he said, his voice low and disgusted.

'And this is why he doesn't like dwarves,' I thought, hopping on one foot to try and wake up my right leg, which had fallen asleep. The brothers gave me questioning looks. "I can't feel my leg," I explained, closing my mouth as Gandalf stormed over, looking angry.

"Don't be a fool," he growled, looking down at Dori. "He's under no enchantment but his own." He turned around and looked us over, forgetting his anger for the moment. "Right, now, get some sleep, all of you. You'll be safe here tonight… I hope." I glared at the wizard as several dwarves looked around nervously as if expecting the bear to come barreling through a wall. "Oin, if you could help the princess with her ankle, I would be much obliged, she seems to have injured it again."

I flushed but nodded gratefully to Fili as he helped lower me onto a pile of hay, only which he spread my blanket. "Thank you," I said as he straightened again, moving out of the way of the healer, who was muttering something about me having more injuries than all the other dwarves combined. Because of his bad hearing, I doubt he thought I could hear, but I still blushed, embarrassed.

Fili smiled minutely at his words and nodded his head. "Feel better, princess," he said, straightening up. Before he left, however, he bent down once more so his mouth was next to my ear. "Thank you, princess, for saving my brother's life."

I nodded, a lump in my throat, and turned back to Oin, who was instructing me to take off my boot. Fili stood and strode away to where his uncle stood, watching me. The exchanged words quietly, and after a minute they both disappeared into a back room. I nodded at the healer and began unlacing my left boot as Kili came over and sat down next to me. He glanced at Oin, decided that he couldn't hear him, and leaned into me, frowning. "Why do you keep saving me?" he asked, his brown eyes curious and searching.

"I'm sorry?" I asked, giving my boot a tug and hissing with pain. I hadn't realized that I hadn't undone the laces all the way and only succeeded in injuring myself further.

"Here, allow me," he said, gently undoing the knots in the laces and sliding the shoe off. For the first time I became aware of the smell of sweaty feet, and I felt somewhat embarrassed, though I wasn't sure why I was so uncomfortable. I slid my sock off, avoiding his gaze as I winced at the purple, black, and blue bruising surrounding my swollen ankle.

Kili winced. "You were sprinting on that?" he asked, looking pained. I nodded. "And you were pulling me along with you," he said, looking guilty and sad.

I started, realizing what he was getting at. "Oh, Kili, no," I said, placing my hand on top of his. "This was not your fault; it would've happened whether I helped you or not."

"But I tripped you," he said, his sad face resembling that of a puppy's. "When I fell, you tripped over me…" I thought back to that incident and winced; he was right. He saw the realization in my face, and his fell. "I'm so sorry—"

"Kili, you saved me," I said, squeezing his hand. "I would've fallen into the creek when I twisted my ankle again, and if you weren't there, Beorn would've killed me. You saved me, you didn't put me in danger." I yelped as Oin pressed hard on a certain point right above my heel, but I missed the scalding look Kili sent his way.

The old healer put his hearing trumpet to his ear. "It's broken," he said, looking over at me.

My mouth fell open. "I'm sorry?" I asked, not believing my ears.

"I'm the one with bad hearing, princess," he scolded. "I said that your ankle is broken. It's a fracture at worst, but you should still stay off it while we're here."

"At best?" I tried, hoping for something a bit less permanent.

"A severe sprain, same instructions. I'll wrap it for you, and you should keep it elevated. Once I'm done, I'll give you something for sleep. I know you elves don't sleep often, but—"

"No!" I yelped, drawing attention from several of the dwarves nearby. "Please," I said, lowering my voice and shaking slightly. I pulled my arms around myself, suddenly cold. "I can not sleep… Is there any way you could give me something different?"

I stopped speaking as my ankle gave a particularly painful throb, and Oin looked thoughtful. "My stores are running somewhat low when it comes to pain relievers… I'm afraid I have to save the non-sleep inducing medicine for injuries that happen during, say, a run like today. Or an injury that occurs when if the subject goes to sleep, he won't wake up. I'm afraid your options are only to take the medication and go to sleep or risk it becoming infected by not taking any medication at all." I bit my lip, wanting to say that I would risk the infection, but Oin turned to Kili before I could say anything. "Why are you here?" he asked. "Shouldn't you be with your brother?"

Kili started and turned slightly red but regained his composure quickly. "I actually was hoping that I could learn to wrap an injury, in case something happens where more than one of us gets injured, I could help."

Oin nodded, pleased. "Alright. I need to make a paste out of this herb Aeyera called Athelas. Others call it Kingsfoil, but whatever it is, I've never quite need anything like it. It had certain healing properties that only elves, from what I've seen, can access. If you could get some of that boiling water from over there, that'd be perfect."

Kili nodded and get to his feet, shaking his legs to regain feeling in them. "I'll be right back," he said to me, taking the pot Oin offered him.

The elder dwarf scoffed. "You're walking across the room, not going off to war, laddie," he said with a gruff laugh. "Get on with it, we'll be fine without you for a few minutes."

He flushed and all but ran into the next room, and I couldn't help but feel bad for him. "Why did you say that?" I asked as Oin unrolled my store of wrappings for my ankle; Oin had given it to me after my last injury in case it happened again so we wouldn't get into his private stores to quickly. Then again, this was a part of his private stores, so I wasn't sure what the point was.

"He was taking too long, lass," he said, pulling out the pouch of Athelas I had given him and handing it to me, knowing that only I could access its healing properties. Kili came back into the room holding the pot of hot water and avoiding my eyes. He set down the pot and sat back, watching to see what I would do and keeping his eyes glued to my hands. Oin, knowing that I preferred to work alone, turned so his back faced me.

I took the Athelas and pressed a handful of the fresher plant in the water, crushing it in my fist. A fresh, sharp smell drifted out of the pot and mingled with the scent of hay and clean animals, and I began singing softly in elvish murmuring a spell my mother had taught me when I was very small. "Ambar aire anar nulla, urwa wilma kelva tulka," I sang softly, closing my eyes and pressing the paste on my ankle. I clenched my teeth as the bone moved, and I continued, gasping. "Ambar aire anar nulla urwa: nu wilma kelva tulka assare."

The pain faded considerably and I lay back, exhausted. I glanced back at my ankle to see that the bruises had faded to green, yellow, and purple; the worst had gone. Kili tapped Oin's shoulder to let him know I was done, and his eyes widened at the sight of my ankle, which was considerably smaller than it had been several minutes before. I rested my head back as Oin began instructing Kili on how to wrap an injured ankle, explaining that each injury was different and therefore had to be treated differently. Thankfully, because I had healed the bone, I didn't need a splint, though, as Oin said, I still needed to be wrapped up tight. "Even elves feel pain, and my job is to fix them up so they don't," Oin said, handing the strips of cloth to Kili after soaking them in the hot water. Kili slowly began to wrap my foot and ankle; normally I drifted into the elvish kind of dreaming, but I was unable to do so because of the sparks of electricity travelling up my spine at his touch. I looked up as he finished and Oin stood, walking over to where his brother Gloin sat.

Kili held in his hand several herbs which I had a feeling would make me go to sleep. I looked up at his eyes quickly, shaking my head. "No, Kili, I can't—"

He held up his hands, "I'm not going to make you do anything, Aeyera. You need to get better, and taking medicine that would help you to sleep would be best."

"You don't understand," I said softly, closing my eyes. "I can't sleep. I seriously can not sleep anymore."

"Then help me understand," Kili said, sitting back and crossing his legs. "Tell me why you can't sleep anymore." He paused for a minute and looked over at the room Thorin and Fili had disappeared into. "It's nightmares, isn't it?"

I looked up at him but didn't answer. I couldn't.

He shook his head. "If you can't tell me why you're having nightmares," he said carefully, "Can you tell me why you keep saving my life?"

I froze, chills travelling down my spine. "What are you talking about?" I whispered, my voice catching.

He scooted closer until we both sat on my blanket, side by side against the pile of hay. "You've saved my life at least twice now. First in the goblin tunnels, you took a flogging for me. Then you jumped in front of Azog the Defiler to protect Uncle… you nearly died, Aeyera. Then today, you dragged me along with you, you broke your ankle again when I tripped you, and you tackled me out of the way when that bear thing nearly bit off my arm. Even before that," he said softly, watching the sunlight fade into moonlight through a skylight. "When we got separated on the cliff, it took Fili all his strength to keep you from jumping off the ridge after me, even though he was about to jump after me himself." I stayed silent and stared at the floor. My throat was choked up, and I pressed my hand to my mouth, trying to keep from crying. Kili placed his hand hesitantly on my back, trying to keep from hurting me. I turned my head, noticing that he was avoiding my hair like the plague. I pulled it to the side so he wouldn't have to touch it, and he smiled a bit and held out the hand holding the medicine. "You've saved me," he whispered. "It's my turn to save you."

I looked up at him questioningly as a tear fell down my cheek. I swiped it away angrily and look over at the young dwarf, confused. "What? How?"

"If you take this," he said, "I'll stay with you. I'll keep the nightmares away. I promise."

"How will you keep them away?" I asked, my voice a whisper.

"If I see you having them," he said, "I'll wake you up. I promise."

"Even if I take them," I said, looking around at the others who had fallen asleep, "it would take a miracle for me to actually sleep."

He shrugged. "You could talk yourself to sleep," he suggested. "Tell me why you're having the nightmares. Maybe if you face it, you won't have them anymore."

I shook my head. "I doubt that will help."

He looked around for help before turning back to me. "Tell me about your home," he said gently. "Your family."

I sighed, resigned. "Alright. Fine, I'll talk to you about my family, not my past."

He nodded, smiling, and mixed the herbs into a cup of water before handing it to me. I accepted it with shaking hands and held it for a moment, unmoving. He covered my hands with his and moved in front of me, his dark eyes staying on my face. "Do you trust me?" he asked. I nodded, and he smiled. He helped me tilt the cup back, and I drank the mixture quickly before my body could convince me not to. I gagged as soon as it was down, and he covered my mouth to keep me from throwing it up. As soon as it was down, I sat back, shaking. "Tell me about your family," he said softly.

I snuggled back into the hay as Kili lay back next to me. He removed my bow, quiver, and knives as well as his own weapons and set them aside at our feet. "My mother died when I was very young," I said softly. "She died defending my brother and I when a pack of orcs attacked us. We were riding along one of the elvish paths through the Greenwood one hundred and eighty-five years ago; I was ten years old. She rode with me on her horse Athelasar. My brother rode beside us on his own horse I had named Scarlet, because of her mane." Kili lay facing me, and a strip of moonlight lit up his eyes, which were watching my lips as I spoke. My eyes were getting heavy, but I fought the sedative, not ready to sleep yet. "My mother had her weapons with her, but my brother did not, and I was much too young to know how to use any weapons. My father was not with us like he normally was, he… he was at the palace, one of the ambassadors from Erebor was visiting at the time. This was back when h-he actually loved me… a band of orcs attacked us from behind, and my brother couldn't do anything to help her. She threw me to him and yelled at him to take me and run. Right as he caught me, an orc aimed for me and let loose an arrow. She jumped in front of it, off her horse, and it hit her in the chest. My brother blew his horn, and I was screaming her name over and over, and he took me and rode away as the other warriors came in. It was too late," I whispered, my eyes drooping shut as I cried. I couldn't tell, but Kili was crying as well, and his left hand was covering his mouth as his right held mine. "I was screaming, crying for her over and over again, but I couldn't reach her. I tried to fight my brother, but he was too strong. He was crying with me, and when we reached the palace, he passed me to Tauriel and ran to my father." My head fell down against the crook of my elbow as sleep began to take me. My eyes closed. "He never loved me after that," I murmured. "He never cared that I left, and if he had known I was being tortured, he wouldn't have cared. Only Legolas cared, and I can't tell him."

"You were tortured?" Kili yelped, squeezing my hand. "When?"

But I had already passed into the darkness, allowing myself to sleep for the first time in centuries.