A/N. I've started to fall in love with a new pairing that no one is really going to get. ;) Maybe I just like pairings with a lot of animosity a la Joning. Anyways, I have been desperate enough to watch the new episodes in Italian (which I don't remember much of).
It's impossible not to like Max - since he's dressed like Dr. Evil sans the cat. Which inspired this drabble. Because every evil genius needs to have a cat.
Also because..
MASSIVE SPOILERS DO NOT READ BELOW UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE SPOILED.
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There's a Max/Scarlett double elimination coming up which means that Scarlett is going to hate Max sooo much. And also there's the reveal of the no-glasses, which I'd like if Max was captivated by Scarlett's evil hotness, but we'll see.
This is set at the start of a new season if Max and Scarlett were to play a part - with Scarlett still seething at Max and Max finally finding out what she'd been saying about him in the confessionals all this time.
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Replaced
"Oh, it's you," Max said spying Scarlett - his voice dripping with animosity. But he didn't really hate Scarlett, not really. He just hated that she didn't want to be his assistant, not that he needed her anymore.
"Hello Max," Scarlett said politely, not giving anything away to how she felt to be stuck with the incompetent boob for another season.
"I think you've noticed that I've replaced you, " Max said staring down at the ginger cat in his arms and stroking it lovingly. "This is my new assistant Scarlett the second."
He was waiting... waiting for her to respond and to have gotten some sort of rise out of her. Some sort of jealousy? There had to be something! They were a team for half a season together!
"She doesn't wear glasses either," he commented astutely.
Scarlett rolled her eyes. "Fascinating."
Max's bottom lip pouted out. How could she not be begging for him to take him back? Sure, he messed up last season but there was clearly no better person for her to ally herself with this season. Who else knew the deep recesses of evil like he did? Nobody!
"This cat will help me rule the world!"
Wait for it.
"Mwhahahahahahaha, ack, ack hack." Max started his maniacal laugh dryly so he ended up hacking at the end of it.
Smooth.
"I'm sure it will."
This was getting frustrating for him! Why wasn't she jealous of the cat?! Why?!
Max tossed the cat aside where it landed on an unsuspecting Harold's face.
"Yah! Get it off!" yelled Harold.
"On second thought, I don't need the cat," Max replied nonchalantly. "We will just team up again and be the epic team of evil we once were!"
Scarlett didn't even miss a beat. "No."
"But w-w-why?" Max's bottom lip was trembling again.
Scarlett turned to him and cooly explained the situation. "I thought I made it clear last season. I don't like you. You are incapable of carrying out any formidable threat ever and..."
That bottom lip trembled more.
Scarlett closed her eyes and heaved a sigh.
"Fine, " she relented finally.
"Yes!" Exclaimed Max! "We will be a force of evil this season unlike any other."
"Under my rules," Scarlett told him. "You don't touch anything, you don't think anything, you do not attempt anything. Are we clear?"
Max shrugged. "Eh, it's still better than carting the cat around for an entire season."
And thus the formidable duo was formed for a second time, until Max got Scarlett booted for the second time and had to work out a new way to come crawling back to her the next year.
The End.