To say I am sorry is an understatement. I'll tell you more at the end of the chapter.

Tara was broken.

She hadn't told Lucy and Quinn everything, even Joey, who she had been with for a year. She hadn't told anyone. But she was broken. Her body felt like shit, her mind felt like shit, and everything just felt like shit. Everything about her. Her mindset, the way she talked or spoke, everything was just pure and stupid shit.

She hated it.

She hated feeling like this. Even when she had seen Lucy again, after so many years of not seeing her, she had been so happy. And then when they were seperated, when their home was burned to the ground in a crisp, and those fuckers had destroyed it, a piece of her broke off.

Everyday, she started to feel a bit more chip off her body, until she was nothing but a pile of dust collecting on the floor. She knew what she had. Depression. It was obvious. She didn't want to leave her room, didn't want to eat, to just sit there and think and be alone.

Everything. Everything was just shit. She was a waste.

A waste.

A complete and utter sense of waste, and she shouldn't even be here on this planet. She should be dead, in the ground, even one of those walkers. But no, she was here, with a fucking baby inside her, crying the days away like it was the end of the world.

Oh wait. The world already ended, and she ended with it.

Her body was aching as she woke up one morning. It had been four months since she had gotten to the zone, and she was five months into her pregnancy. Maybe six. She didn't really know anymore. And she knew she should have been taking better care of her body. She was skinnier than a pregnant woman should be, and dind't go out as much.

She places a hand on her stomach, breifly wondering what the baby would look like. Maybe a little girl. She had always wanted a little girl when she was younger. A little sister, but she had never recieved one in return for her wish.

"Poor little baby," she mumbles quietly before standing up.

She walks into her room they had given her. It was like some giant hotel room, but she guessed it was an apartment kind because that was the vibe she was getting from it. It was okay, with bright colors that completely disregarded her feelings at the current moments. Maybe having them in the room would 'britghten' her mood. Not so much.

In fact, she sort of felt like shit. Still. Always and forever, at this point.

She grabs a granola bar from her small kitchen and nibbles on it, glancing outside at all the people talking and conversing with each other.

Carol and the others had yet to strike, and it was a bit nerveracking for everyone in their small little zone. She was waiting for when all of this would go down. Something good can never last forever. At least from what she had witnessed, it never did. Her home, her life, it was all gone, replaced with this new one she barely knew how to handle. She didn't even want to be a mother now, but of course, that wasn't 'God's plan.'

Fucking a-hole. She was so done with this bullshit, of the world always being against them. She wished she could just fall asleep and never wake up, stay stuck in her dreamland.

Fall asleep...and never wake up...

Before she could even think about going to her bathroom, a knock on the door stops her from doing anything. She walks-or waddles-with her stomach, opening the door. Lucy stood outside.

"Hey," she says softly.

"Hey," she mumbles.

"Mind if I come in?" Tara simply opens the door, letting her walk inside. "How're you doing? I haven't seen you in a couple of days."

"As best as I can be," Tara mumbles, looking back at the bathroom. She had been so close.

Lucy looks at her quietly before glancing outside at the children. "They're having so much fun, playing some soccer. I've seen Emily and Carl get quite close lately. You think something's going on?" Tara shrugs.

"Probably. They're some of the only teens here." Lucy chuckles and leans against the windowsill.

"True." She looks over at Tara's stomach and feels her head drop, before letting out a deep sigh. "Alright, I didn't come here to talk aboubt my kids. I'm here to talk to you." Tara rolls her eyes.

"You don't have to. I'm just fi-"

"I know you're suicidal, Tara," she says bluntly, causing the woman to take a step back. "I know. Trust me."

"You don't know anything," Tara mutters.

"Really?"

She closes the blinds to outside so people wouldn't see them, and comes closer to Tara. She heads into her bathroom, and Tara instantly calls out, telling her to stop. A moment later, Lucy emerges with a blade in her right hand and a box of pills in her left.

"Really? I don't know anything? Like the fact that you're cutting yourself? Or that you;'re starving yourself when you have a fucking baby growing inside of you? Or also that you were thinking of overdosing?! This isn't right, Tara! You have a baby, a living fucking human, growing inside of you! You need to wake the hell up!"

Tara glares. "You don't know what this feels like!" she screams. "I'm surrounded by darkness all around me, trying to find something to make my life worth living! This baby isn't a gift, it's casuing me to feel like shit! I hate what I look like now! There's no one here to help! You have no idea!"

"I HAVE NO IDEA?!" Lucy yells. "ME? THE GIRL WHO GOT RAPED?"

Tara cringes and looks away, knowing she had hit a sensitive topic. Lucy walks right up to her and pushes her aside, her eyes shaped into a glare, evil and angry.

"I was only a teenager. I had my whole entire damn life ahead of me. You think I WANTED to be a mother at the age I was? You think i WANTED THAT? I hated the idea of having a baby! Hell, I even though about taking abortion pills to give rid of it! But I didn't! I have the most beautiful and wonderful little girl I could ever have, with an amzing family, and I could never be more thankful!"

"You have a husband. You have poeple by your side. You have that," she mumbles.

"So do you," Lucy says softly, her voice lowering.

"No, no I don't," Tara mutters, bitter at her own tone. "I have no one on my side. I'm stuck with this baby inside of me, that's probably not even going to make it a week. I'm going to be a terrible mother, and it's going to die. I'm not saying it might. It's going to."

Lucy looks at her friend sadly before sitting her down on the couch, and taking her face within her soft hands. Tara started to cry, tears streaming down her cheeks. All this self-hate and depression she had been keeping within her closets were finally coming out.

"First off, that baby is not going to die," Lucy says softly. "We have the supplies, we have the shelter. If my baby can survive, so can yours. Secondly, you are going to be the most awesome mom ever. You're so cool to us. It's almost guaranteed you're going to be an amazing mom." Tara lets out a slight laugh but listens to her speak more. "Third, you have so many people by your side that you are never going to be alone. Why are you so nervous to be this person that someone looks up to?"

"Because I'm not!" Tara says, looking at her. "I can't be." Lucy shakes her head and runs a hand through her friends hair.

"You're going to be alright. Trust me." She pecks her friends forehead and pulls her up. "Now come on. We have people to talk to. It's not the end of the world." Tara raises an eyebrow. "Alright, the dead might be walking but we're still alive. C'mon."

Tara chuckles for the first time in a while and follows her down the stairs, leading into the courtyard. She saw a shit ton of people come up to her and wish her well, and she sat down, thinking about the idiot she was. She was fucked, she knew that, but at least it wasn't just her.

If Lucy said it was okay, then it would be okay.

~%~

"We need to make sure that the walls are blocked," Lucy states to Joey. "More snipers as well, just in case they make some sort of surprise attack." He nods, looking down at the map of the resort.

"And we need to increase the wall strength, make sure they won't get taken down." Lucy nods before she looks at Tara. "What do you think?"

Tara sighs. "I think it's a great plan, but we need to make sure that it does work. Have a dry run. Because if they do pull a fast one on us, we need to be ready." Lucy nods before peeking outside, and suddenly she sees Daryl was back from hunting. She smiles and steps outside.

"Hey." She leans up and pecks his lips, before looking down at the food he got. "Found a deer? Really?" He nods.

"Thought they were runnin' out. Apparently not," he chuckles.

"We're gonna be eatin' good tonight." They start to walk towards the center of the resort, as Tara and Joey looks over plans. Daryl looks down at her.

"How are the plans going?"

Lucy lets out a soft sigh. "Good. I had to practically force Tara to come. Daryl, I'm worried about her. She's so suicidal right now. She's afraid she's going to hurt her baby, or that she's going to die. I feel terrible for her." DAryl nods his head from side to side.

"Well, if ya can have a kid, so can she. We have the methods and all that shit." Lucy nods her head, looking at the kids playing soccer. Lily was with the others, while Sam was playing in the sand. Lucy leans nezt to Daryl, seeing Emily taking care of Mason.

"I think we've done a great job here," she says softly.

Daryl smiles a bit and squeezes her side. "Think so too."

It was quiet for a moment, a tender moment of peace, Lucy looking at her kids in happiness. If someone had told her a few years ago she'd be married, have four kids, and a dog that loved her all while surviving a world where the dead walked, she would have laughed in their face.

She looks up at Daryl to say something, but was suddenly cut off by a gun being shot. And with that, Lucy fell onto the ground, blood coming from her head.

The woman had been shot.

"No!" Daryl screams, catching her before she could fall. Everyone looked up in shock, seeing her on the ground, unconscious. Sam looked over, her brow furrowed.

"...mommy?"

Gunshots fired everywhere, and everyone ran for cover. The fuckers had surprised them. They were being attacked.

Daryl looks down at Lucy, seeing her passed out, bleeding on the ground. He wanted to scream, wanted to yell in pain, wanted to kill whoever had shot his wife, but he couldn't do that. He picked her up and carried her inside to where they had an infirmary. He looks at Quinn, who looked shocked.

"What-"

"Quinn, take care of her," he growls at the woman. "Ya don't let her die. Keep her alive." With that, he runs back outside to keep the kids safe. Quinn looks down at the girl that was her best friend, looking at the injury on her head. She had only been skimmed.

An inch closer and she would have been dead meat.

"Fuck, Lucy," she whispers, taking out stitching supplies. "Always have to have the near-death experiences, don't you? Make us all shit our pants."

Quinn swore she could hear her laugh, but since the woman was passed out on a table, bleeding, she didn't focus on that. All she had to focus on was keeping her alive. And she had a feeling if she didn't, she would most likely get her head chopped off by Daryl.

~%~

Sam had run towards the nearest table to hide under when she heard the gunshots. She was scared, afraid of what was happening. Her hands were covering her head, and tears were streaming down her face.

She had seen Emily run with Mason, and Lily had run off too. When she peeked out from under the table, she saw her daddy running towards the walls, his gun in his hands.

"Dadd-"

Before she could scream out to him, she was suddenly taken and dragged away, causing her to scream. The person muffled her mouth, and looked down at her with malice,

"God, you're just as loud as your damn mother," she growls before covering Sam's mouth with a clothe.

Sam tries to break free, but it was no use. She passed out in seconds. The woman dragged her towards three other bodies, all unconscious.

Sam. Emily and Mason. Lily.

The woman takes off her mask, and smiles. It was a devilish grin she had on, Carol Peletier. And she was going to make Lucy's life a living hell. Starting with these four.

~%~

AUTHORS NOTE

Okay, first of all. Left ya on a cliffhanger. Second. I'm sorry I haven't updated this in literally a year. Junior year, the summer, and the beginning of senior year was hell for me. I had so much drama and work that I wasn't able to make time for writing, which I regret immensely. I hope none of you have left this story because I haven't updated. It's for you guys to read, and I had some time today.

Now, I'm hoping to cap this story at maybe 45 chapters, maybe more than that. I've recently gotten some new ideas for this. I won't say I'll update every week, but if I have time, then I'll most likely be writing chapters for this, Fighter, and my other story Polarized, because now the hard part of senior year is over. I just had to put out my applications and everything.

Again, I am SO SORRY for not updating in such a long time. I swear, you will see more of Lucy and Daryl along with co. as of now. Thanks for still reading, lovelies, and don't forget to review and tell me what you think :)

-Ali