Author: Ri-Ryn

Chapter: 11 Strikes – Unearned Run (UER)

Word Count: 1217

Rating: M* (Content suitable for Mature Teens)/ +T

Disclaimer: Diamond no Ace belongs to Yuji Terajima.

Warnings: Strong Language/Cursing.

A/N: I am so sorry I ran with this prompt into a really late or early Halloween: all equally bad since this was for Valentine's Day. I present the loving assassin who is a tad OOC here.

Prompter: For justabithungry on FF and fujiokaa of AO3. They wanted cooking, a bit of blood, and Valentine's. This should not have happened.

If there was ever a common sight to be seen at Seidō, it was Sawamura screeching, running, or a particularly grotesque combination of both simultaneously. This happened to be one of such times as Sawamura skittered about the dorm's halls, almost colliding with Tanba, Masuko, and Chris.

"Senpai!" Eijun panted. This was bad, so very, very bad. "Have you seen them anywhere?!"

Tanba pursed his lips while Masuko shrugged, no clue as to what was distressing the younger pitcher. Chris took pity on her.

"Seen what anywhere, Sawamura?" Chris smiled gently as the younger girl spluttered. Chris-senpai should be outlawed. Wait. Eijun frowned. Then he wouldn't be my catcher? Never mind that!

She shook her head, hoping to loose such pointless thoughts while amusing the three upperclassman.

"My gifts for the team!" Eijun retorted somewhat hotly. She had spent hours on them and someone couldn't wait one more day?

"Gifts?" Tanba piped up. Gifts for what?

Eijun blushed, suddenly realizing twelve hours of work later from slaving away in the Greenhorn Dorm's kitchen that she had actually made Valentine Days chocolate.

"Uhm...just that thing...the fourteenth of...I guess the month of February?"

That was word vomit if Chris had ever heard it. A soft chuckle escaped the catcher. "You mean Valentine's-"

"Stop! Do not advance another base!" The pitcher's hand twisted into her hair out of overt embarrassment.

Cute.

Tanba finally stepped in, feeling pity. "Well, whatever was made, surely it didn't just up and walk off, right? Have you asked anyone else yet?"

Eijun frowned. "Of course they wouldn't just walk off." She was abnormally grim. "I highly wouldn't advise that of them." Taking a moment, she nodded. "Right, thank-you Tanba-senpai, Chris-senpai, and Masuko-senpai! This humble pitcher shall further search amongst her peers for the culprit!"

And with that she was off but something still bugged Masuko.

"Why?"

Chris and Tanba both raised an eyebrow at the slugger, prompting him.

"Why would it be inadvisable if they ran off? Their chocolates, right?"

Chris hummed noncommittally. "Didn't she mean the players?"

Tanba snorted. "Probably." Occasionally the third years contemplated painting the number eighteen onto a rock, slapping a cap on and dumping it onto the pitcher's mound.

"Fellow subjects!" Eijun bellowed as she rudely intruded upon the dorm currently hosting Miyuki, Kuramochi, Kanemaru, and Shirasu, "This foot soldier of Nagano asks if thy has seen any chocolates running about?"

The fuck? Miyuki and Kuramochi exchanged glances as she advanced upon them.

"This better not be a joke about us not having time for girlfriends Bakamura."

Eijun huffed, giving up on subtlety here. "No it isn't, Mochi-senpai. I made them for the team but they're gone and I've been looking since this morning."

She can bake? Miyuki smiled bemusedly but firmly stayed out of this. It wasn't him anyway.

Shirasu finally butted in, acquitting the group. "No, Sawamura-kun, we haven't seen them."

"Ah, too bad." Smiling and like a snake, the round weight at her feet was up and, turning, pitched at the door to close it mere centimeters from Kanemaru's head. She was on her prey in seconds and Shinji fucking swore that the plaster her hand made contact with no longer belonged to the wall as a single piece.

The three upperclassman were scared shitless, backing up closer to the television and content to sacrifice the upcoming third baseman.

She flashed her teeth, leaning close to keep this private as usual. "Where were you going, Kane-kun? Not running away, right?"

Shinji swallowed. These bastards here had no fuckin' clue that Wamura battled her bento daily for the right to consume it. His breadth hitched as the three centimeter difference put her sinister whispers against his a throat. "N-no."

Eijun smiled prettily. "Where are they Kane-kun? You're the only one foolish enough to try and trash them."

"Wasn't me. Swear." And it really hadn't been- Shinji had been stupid enough to assume she didn't want to kill her teammates and now look where he was. There was a reason his protests to tutoring her were token at best. Not only that, he remembered the December massacre her Home Ec classmates participated in unwittingly.

"Unfortunate." Damn, not here either. Eijun extracted herself from him, glancing behind her as she left. "Miyuki Kazuya-senpai, Kuramochi Yōichi-senpai, Shirasu Kenjirō-senpai, Kane-kun?" She held a soft finger to her lips. "Shh. 'Kay?"

Shinji didn't move a hot minute before dryly swallowing his own tongue. "If she finds them? Run."

Tetsuya found his unexpected happiness humming in the hallway going towards the kitchen, a medium burlap bag in her grasp.

"Eijun-san."

Eijun perked up, blushing as she swiveled to meet her captain's gaze. "Leader!"

The fourth-hole felt his lips twitch in an inadvertent half smile. "Tetsuya, remember?" She would be meeting his family after Koshien regardless of the results, after all.

"Tetsu-san." Eijun compromised shyly. It was here that the bag in her grasp began its posturing again, growling and clicking while it thrashed inside its burlap prison.

Eijun grinned and with no hesitation slammed the bag into the wall to her left, quieting its insides as Tetsuya blinked.

His future wife, coupled with being an excellent shogi player whose capabilities exceeded even those of himself and Miyuki, was odd as she was sunny.

"The bag?"

"Ah, I found my runaway chocolates."

Tetsu blanched. "How did you get them back?"

She shrugged helplessly. "A little bit of this, a little bit of that. Now I just need to sever their arms and legs from their torsos and pack them separately, 'ya know?"

And with women his mother taught him a variety of things were best left unanswered so with a swift head pat he gracefully bowed out of there.

It was Kawakami who stopped himself and Furuya from entering the mess hall, both intent on grabbing a sports drink from the fridge. Eijun's slim back faced the two containers to her side and a steady rhythm of chopping. That wasn't even the worst part. No, it was the screeching that began as she grabbed something new to cut before the knife ended its' existence and she deposited.

Eijun hummed to herself, continuing to divide the rebellious Valentine's treats.

Furuya piped up quietly, recalling the long winter nights Kanemaru had holed himself up in their dorm from the fallout. "The Home Ec class," he started, "and the lacrosse team."

Kawakami caught on. His class had missed a week of culinary class related to an undesignated accident this past winter.

Both quietly came out the way they came in because no.

Omake 1:

"Nii-san, they're saying someone poisoned Inashiro and Yakushi. They think its foul play!"

Ryōsuke grimaced but outwardly gave Haruichi his best pity smile. "Absolutely terrible." Horrible really but he couldn't allow their stupid southpaw to off the entirety of the first and second string. So? Something else obviously had to go when a few piss scared underclassman came to him.

"Absolutely awful." Tetsuya added, disappointed their best competitors were out in such a dishonorable way.

Ryōsuke stared at him stonily, refraining from extrapolating a damn thing their captain's will-be spouse caused out of good intentions.

Omake 2:

"It's a shame no one else got any of Eijun's chocolates. They were quite good." Tetsuya frowned.

Was he fucking with him? Ryōsuke glared. "How are you still walking while alive?"