We'll Burn Together
Disclaimer: The song used in this fic is "Burn With You" by Lea Michele.
Tip: Listen to the song as you read. Read the paragraph that is underneath the most recent lyrics for the best effect.
Knock! Knock! A knock at the door caught Sam's attention, nearly giving him a heart attack. He was knee deep in his book and wasn't expecting to be interrupted, not anymore at least. He set his book down on the desk and walked over to the door, gun in hand just in case. He opened the door and a smile appeared on his face. "Cas!" he exclaimed. He tossed the gun aside and took the angel into his arms. "What are you doing here? It's been forever!"
"Yes, it has been a long time," said Castiel. He returned Sam's embrace. Sam pulled away and stepped aside.
"Come on in." Castiel stepped inside the bunker and Sam shut the door behind them. "How's heaven, any better?" Sam sat down at the table and offered Castiel a seat.
Castiel sat down and sighed. "All fixed," he said as the corners of his mouth raised for the first time in ages. He couldn't wait to see Dean. He had heard that Dean was alive, and that was all he needed to know. "Everything is back to normal. No more rebellions or angels trying to play God."
"That's a relief," replied Sam. He felt his current smile fading. How was he going to tell Castiel? It was hard news for anyone to hear, but for him…
"Not that I don't enjoy your company, but may I see Dean?" asked Castiel with hope flooding in his eyes. Sam felt like he had been stabbed in the stomach. He assumed that his face gave everything away because Castiel's hope drained away. "What…what is it?"
"Cas…" Sam felt tears from his own grief gather in his eyes. "Dean's...not here."
Castiel sat up straight in his seat, "What do you mean Sam? I heard he was alive!"
"He is…sort of. Listen, Cas, something…happened."
"Sam," Castiel felt a sting in his chest, "tell me."
We are broken, we can't fix it
There's no cure for our condition
Desperate eyes are staring at me
Should be hopeless but we're happy
It's not perfect here between us
Even angels have their demons
Trapped inside this twisted circle
It's not right but it's eternal
Sam explained everything to Castiel. He told him how Dean had been stabbed by Metatron, and he had summoned Crowley only to find out that Dean was a demon. When Dean came back as demon, he wasn't the same. He still had his old memories, but emotion was gone. He left with Crowley and went to hell. Crowley was strangely kind enough to let Sam know that Dean wasn't being tortured, and he was evil enough to mention Dean had become the torturer. Dean was ripping souls apart in hell, and he was enjoying every moment of it. Castiel sat in his chair completely stunned. He stared at Sam with his mouth slightly open, tears forming in his sapphire eyes. Sam knew how Castiel felt about Dean. He had known a long time, and was waiting for his brother to admit he reciprocated, but now it was too late. He looked at Castiel with sad eyes. "I am so sorry, Cas."
There's a white light
And it's calling me
And it's promising
Ecstasy, but
I don't wanna go to heaven
If you're going to hell
I will burn with you
I will burn with you
Castiel stood up and scanned the room for a door he knew would lead him into another room. "I'll be back," he said as he walked into another room and shut and locked the door behind him. He took a deep breath, and lost it. He began to throw things across the room. He screamed at heaven and at himself that this was his fault. He was too late, he couldn't break the tablet in time, and he couldn't save Dean. Tears streamed down his face as he fell to his knees an agony. He didn't want to be without Dean. He couldn't be without him. In that moment, he made the biggest decision he had ever made.
We're not healthy barely breathing There's a white light
But his keeps my heart beating
We are lost when we're together
But I'll follow you forever
And it's calling me
And it's promising
Ecstasy, but
I don't wanna go to heaven
If you're going to hell
I will burn with you
I will burn with you
I don't wanna go to heaven
If you're going to hell
I will burn with you
I will burn with you
Castiel made his way to the only place he knew to go, the crossroad. He placed his picture in a container with the correct items and buried it in the center of the road. Before he could turn to look, Crowley appeared. Crowley laughed when he saw Castiel. "Giraffe, of all the people I expected to summon me for a deal, you were not one of them."
"I want to sell my soul," said Castiel before Crowley could speak another annoying word.
"Oh," said Crowley intrigued, "for what? You want to be God again? Or do you want to become president? Oh! I know, you want a bigger-"
"Nothing!" shouted Castiel. "I don't want anything. Just take my soul. Let me go to hell."
Crowley raised an eyebrow. "Let you go to hell? Why would you- Wait." A wide smirk appeared on his lips. "So, it's true then."
Castiel narrowed his eyes, "What?"
Crowley took a step closer to Castiel and lowered his tone to nearly a whisper. "You, Castiel, angel of the Lord, are in love with Dean Winchester." Castiel remained silent. He simply looked away from Crowley. "I'll be. Well, you've got your wish."
Castiel looked up hopefully, "Really?"
"Yup. See, Abaddon stole a lot of my thunder when she took over. I need to reinstall fear. And nothing says authority like taking an angel's soul." Crowley snapped his fingers. "There. It's done." Suddenly, an angel blade appeared on the ground. "When you bite the dust, you go downstairs. You have as much time as you need. Get your affairs in order, say your goodbyes, whatever it is you sickly in love angels do. Say hi to Dean for me. I'll make sure you're on his rack." Crowley flashed a cocky smile and vanished.
I don't wanna dream without you
I don't wanna be without you
I'll do anything you want me to
Cuz I know you'd burn with me too
I don't wanna dream without you
I don't wanna be without you
I'll do anything you want me to
Cuz I know you'd burn with me too
Castiel's heart began to race. Hell. What had he done? He was an angel. He didn't belong in hell; he belonged in heaven. Suddenly, his mind was filled with memories of Dean. He remembered first meeting Dean. He remembered Dean stabbing him with a demon blade and being baffled when it didn't work. His mind was racing along with his heart. He remembered rebelling, stopping the apocalypse, he remembered Dean being the only one to stand by him when he messed up with the souls, he remembered Dean searching for him in purgatory, he remembered when he fell and Dean did everything to help him. But most of all, he remembered falling in love with Dean.
There's a white light
And it's calling me
Castiel raised the blade, and drove it through his heart.
I don't wanna go to heaven
If you're going to hell
I will burn with you
I will burn with you
I don't wanna go to heaven
If you're going to hell
I will burn with you
I will burn with you
I don't wanna dream without you
I don't wanna be without you
I'll do anything you want me to
Cuz I know you'd burn with me too
I don't wanna dream without you
I don't wanna be without you
I'll do anything you want me to
Cuz I know you'd burn with me too
Castiel opened his eyes and screamed. He felt his whole body sting with pain. He was being cut, burned, and God only knows what else was happening to him. His body was in pain, but he felt his mouth form a small smile. "Dean."
"Cas?" asked Dean completely stunned. He dropped his torture device. "What are you doing here?" Castiel felt tears gather in his eyes.
"I came to be with you, Dean," he said, his voice lowered.
Dean looked at Castiel with his cold, black eyes, but Castiel could still see the shock. "What do you mean you came to be with me?"
"Dean, all those years ago, when I was going to tell you something and couldn't, do you remember?" asked Castiel. Dean nodded his head yes. "I was going to tell you I was in love with you. I am in love with you, Dean Winchester. And I still want you, cursed or not."
Dean's eyes shined like coal, but they somehow reflected guilt, surprise, and everything else. "Cas, you know demons can't feel emotions, right?"
"Look at me, Dean!" cried Castiel as tears escaped his eyes. "Really, really look at me."
Dean stared into the eyes of the angel. His angel. Suddenly it all started coming back. This was his angel. The angel that had rebelled, that had given everything for him. All the memories flooded back to him. He remembered all the times Castiel saved him and his brother, he remembered when Castiel was killed by Leviathans, and how empty it left him, he remembered the joy felt when Castiel came back from purgatory, and he remembered when Castiel was under Naomi's influence. He had said, "I need you." when he wanted more than anything to say, "I love you."
Castiel watched, as with each passing moment, the black in Dean's eyes faded until they were a beautiful emerald green again. Dean felt a tear slide down the side of his face. "Cas," he said embracing the angel. "You know there's no going back." Castiel nodded.
"I know," he said.
There's a white light
And it's calling me
Dean brought one hand to the back of his neck. "Then we'll burn together." Dean brushed his lips against Castiel's and held him as the flames of hell swallowed them up forever.