Um. . . hi. . . I'm new to this section. ^_^; *looks around nervously* Woo.
. . scary judging eyes. . . all watching me. . . THE VOICES! THE VOICES, OH
GOD! MAKE THEM STOP! MAKE 'EM STOP! WAAAAAAH!
(ahem) Uh. . . yeah. . . *coughs*
Ok, this story is my pitiful attempt at Kingdom Hearts humorness. It'll get much better later on, once I get the feel for the characters. I promise. Kid's Honor. ^_^ Until then, I'll just be in the shadows of all you other wonderful KH humor authors. *bows to you* Take me as a pupil, and train me in your ways of wonder and glory! And randomness. I worship professionals. *cheesy smile*
Disclaimer: No own Kingom Hearts or all characters contained within. 8_8 Woe is me. They belong to Squaresoft, Disney, and all those othah rich people. X_x;
Now, if anyone is still reading, heeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's the story!
(Of a lovely lady! Who was bring up three very lovely girls! Blah blah blah blah. . . bladdy blah blah blah blah. . . ect. ect.)
--~~*~~--
Part One: Introductory
--~~*~~--
Sora sighed deeply, his bangs slightly rustled by the wind he exhaled. All around him the slimy walls of Monstro's flesh pulsed, sickly spots of every color adding to the repulsiveness. The very floor he stood upon was honeycombed with throbbing veins.
Nausea filled his stomach. Groaning, he closed his eyes and massaged his aching temples.
"This has got to be the sickest mission ever!" he declared, wishing desperately there was somewhere he could rest without being coated with sticky internal juices. "I'm so tired and icky! My beautiful shoes are covered with goo!" As an attempt to emphasize the comment, he tried to lift up a soggy shoe for his comrades to see, but lost his footing and plunked onto the squishy surface below.
He let out a wail of dismay as he disgustedly lifted up a slimy hand, thin strings of the fleshy secretion hanging from his fingers. "Oh, man! Now I'm covered in the stuff!" he whined, "When I find Riku, I am gonna grab him by the throat, and just start smashing his perfect little face into Monstro's --"
"Now, now, Sora," Goofy urged, taking a gentle hold on Sora's slippery shoulders, "Don't do anything you'll regret."
Sora allowed the human-like canine to hoist him to his feet. Brushing aside a few globby strands of brown hair, he grumbled, "Oh, I won't regret it. . ." In his mind's eye, he could just see himself taking his sweet revenge on the silver haired youth. Playing with Pinocchio indeed.
Donald was tapping his foot impatiently. "Aw, we'll worry about Riku when the time comes." he squawked in his usual aggravating tone. "C'mon, I can see the next chamber from here."
Sora glanced disheartedly up. "We've been through that chamber before! We're going around in circles!"
"Oh, shut up! You don't know nothing!" Donald shouted, waving his wings in the air. Goofy sighed, and took his usual spot away from the fight, taking on his daily role of mediator.
"I do so know something! I know lots of stuff!" Sora shouted back. Donald scowled.
"Like what?!" he demanded, "Give me one good example!"
Sora opened his mouth to answer, but nothing was coming. The static of an unclear reception buzzed in his head as his tiny prissy brain clicked off.
"Uh. . ."
Donald burst into fits of annoying screeching laughter. Between shrieks, he managed, "What'd I tell ya? You're a complete numbskull!"
"Oh, shut up!" Sora cried again, whipping out his KeyBlade and charging at the cackling duck. Goofy stumbled forward.
"Hey, Sora! Wait! Gawsh, doncha think you're taking this a bit too far?"
As the lanky knight plodded over in an attempt to keep Sora from turning Donald into a freshly roasted Christmas dinner, neither of the three heroes sensed the oncoming danger that was currently clicking their way over, drawn by the power of the KeyBlade.
--~~*~~--
"When you wish upon a STAAAAAAAAR. . . Makes no difference who you AREEE. . . ANYTHING YOUR HEART DESIRES WILL --"
"GODDAMMIT, STUPID LITTLE MARIONETTE FROM HELL!!! SHUT THE HELL UP!!!"
"Aww. . . But Riku-sama, you said you'd play with me!" the little wooden boy whined, looking up at the tall, silvery haired teen who was currently dragging him by the wrist. "You promised! Oh, and please don't use those not-very-nice words. They burn my poor, G-rated wooden ears."
Riku scowled, lifting the little puppet up so they saw eye to eye. Pinocchio trembled under the teen's hard, icy glare. Riku was scary when he was mad.
"I didn't promise no jack-shit!" he spat, shaking the hapless little doll around, his fist clenched tight around the wooden boy's smoothly sanded wrist with rage.
"And don't dare you be telling' me how I should speak!" he added angrily, "I can curse as much as I damn want to! Now, don't you ever try and tell me what to do again, dammit, or I'll turn you into a little cup of saw dust! And I ain't kidding!"
Pinocchio was shaking so terribly, one could've sworn he was malfunctioning or something. Then suddenly, he burst into little puppety tears, whining and crying and basically soaking poor Riku to the bone with his stupid blubbering.
Riku was somewhat surprised, and felt a small pang of guilt inside of his cold, dark soul. Why, oh why did this little puppet have to be THE puppet who would help Kairi? Sighing, he leaned against the spongy walls, and awkwardly cradled the little wooden doll.
Pinocchio buried his face in Riku's neck, sobbing pitifully, his long, rounded pink nose probing at the youth's Adam's apple. Riku swallowed hard, trying not to gag. He softly patted the little boy's back in a way he hoped was comforting.
Riku isn't all that well with affection, it seems.
I'll just hafta endure, he decided. I need this kid in perfect condition if I want his heart.
Sighing again, he began studying the "ceiling", hoping to distract his short attention span long enough for Pinocchio to get over his crying. There wasn't anything particularly interesting about the insides of a whale. Sticky, slimy, blue spotted flesh. Wow.
Riku noticed Pinocchio was suddenly beginning to twitch, rapidly and without warning, the spasms wracking his little body. Hiccups. And not a glass of pure water in the whole damn fish. It was going to be a long, long day.
--~~*~~--
OWARI. . . for now. . .
--~~*~~--
Okay, that was a terrible start, but a start nonetheless! (this story is based on comments made by my friends and myself. We love making stories up during actual gameplay. It's fun, seriously. Try it if you have time to waste.)
*waits for story to explode on her* I know, it sucked. It'll get better! Honest! *bashes self on head to get creative juices going* @_@; Owchies. Creativeness hurties my poor wittle bwain. X_x;
(ahem) Review! But please, spare the air. No open flames. ^_^
(ahem) Uh. . . yeah. . . *coughs*
Ok, this story is my pitiful attempt at Kingdom Hearts humorness. It'll get much better later on, once I get the feel for the characters. I promise. Kid's Honor. ^_^ Until then, I'll just be in the shadows of all you other wonderful KH humor authors. *bows to you* Take me as a pupil, and train me in your ways of wonder and glory! And randomness. I worship professionals. *cheesy smile*
Disclaimer: No own Kingom Hearts or all characters contained within. 8_8 Woe is me. They belong to Squaresoft, Disney, and all those othah rich people. X_x;
Now, if anyone is still reading, heeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's the story!
(Of a lovely lady! Who was bring up three very lovely girls! Blah blah blah blah. . . bladdy blah blah blah blah. . . ect. ect.)
--~~*~~--
Part One: Introductory
--~~*~~--
Sora sighed deeply, his bangs slightly rustled by the wind he exhaled. All around him the slimy walls of Monstro's flesh pulsed, sickly spots of every color adding to the repulsiveness. The very floor he stood upon was honeycombed with throbbing veins.
Nausea filled his stomach. Groaning, he closed his eyes and massaged his aching temples.
"This has got to be the sickest mission ever!" he declared, wishing desperately there was somewhere he could rest without being coated with sticky internal juices. "I'm so tired and icky! My beautiful shoes are covered with goo!" As an attempt to emphasize the comment, he tried to lift up a soggy shoe for his comrades to see, but lost his footing and plunked onto the squishy surface below.
He let out a wail of dismay as he disgustedly lifted up a slimy hand, thin strings of the fleshy secretion hanging from his fingers. "Oh, man! Now I'm covered in the stuff!" he whined, "When I find Riku, I am gonna grab him by the throat, and just start smashing his perfect little face into Monstro's --"
"Now, now, Sora," Goofy urged, taking a gentle hold on Sora's slippery shoulders, "Don't do anything you'll regret."
Sora allowed the human-like canine to hoist him to his feet. Brushing aside a few globby strands of brown hair, he grumbled, "Oh, I won't regret it. . ." In his mind's eye, he could just see himself taking his sweet revenge on the silver haired youth. Playing with Pinocchio indeed.
Donald was tapping his foot impatiently. "Aw, we'll worry about Riku when the time comes." he squawked in his usual aggravating tone. "C'mon, I can see the next chamber from here."
Sora glanced disheartedly up. "We've been through that chamber before! We're going around in circles!"
"Oh, shut up! You don't know nothing!" Donald shouted, waving his wings in the air. Goofy sighed, and took his usual spot away from the fight, taking on his daily role of mediator.
"I do so know something! I know lots of stuff!" Sora shouted back. Donald scowled.
"Like what?!" he demanded, "Give me one good example!"
Sora opened his mouth to answer, but nothing was coming. The static of an unclear reception buzzed in his head as his tiny prissy brain clicked off.
"Uh. . ."
Donald burst into fits of annoying screeching laughter. Between shrieks, he managed, "What'd I tell ya? You're a complete numbskull!"
"Oh, shut up!" Sora cried again, whipping out his KeyBlade and charging at the cackling duck. Goofy stumbled forward.
"Hey, Sora! Wait! Gawsh, doncha think you're taking this a bit too far?"
As the lanky knight plodded over in an attempt to keep Sora from turning Donald into a freshly roasted Christmas dinner, neither of the three heroes sensed the oncoming danger that was currently clicking their way over, drawn by the power of the KeyBlade.
--~~*~~--
"When you wish upon a STAAAAAAAAR. . . Makes no difference who you AREEE. . . ANYTHING YOUR HEART DESIRES WILL --"
"GODDAMMIT, STUPID LITTLE MARIONETTE FROM HELL!!! SHUT THE HELL UP!!!"
"Aww. . . But Riku-sama, you said you'd play with me!" the little wooden boy whined, looking up at the tall, silvery haired teen who was currently dragging him by the wrist. "You promised! Oh, and please don't use those not-very-nice words. They burn my poor, G-rated wooden ears."
Riku scowled, lifting the little puppet up so they saw eye to eye. Pinocchio trembled under the teen's hard, icy glare. Riku was scary when he was mad.
"I didn't promise no jack-shit!" he spat, shaking the hapless little doll around, his fist clenched tight around the wooden boy's smoothly sanded wrist with rage.
"And don't dare you be telling' me how I should speak!" he added angrily, "I can curse as much as I damn want to! Now, don't you ever try and tell me what to do again, dammit, or I'll turn you into a little cup of saw dust! And I ain't kidding!"
Pinocchio was shaking so terribly, one could've sworn he was malfunctioning or something. Then suddenly, he burst into little puppety tears, whining and crying and basically soaking poor Riku to the bone with his stupid blubbering.
Riku was somewhat surprised, and felt a small pang of guilt inside of his cold, dark soul. Why, oh why did this little puppet have to be THE puppet who would help Kairi? Sighing, he leaned against the spongy walls, and awkwardly cradled the little wooden doll.
Pinocchio buried his face in Riku's neck, sobbing pitifully, his long, rounded pink nose probing at the youth's Adam's apple. Riku swallowed hard, trying not to gag. He softly patted the little boy's back in a way he hoped was comforting.
Riku isn't all that well with affection, it seems.
I'll just hafta endure, he decided. I need this kid in perfect condition if I want his heart.
Sighing again, he began studying the "ceiling", hoping to distract his short attention span long enough for Pinocchio to get over his crying. There wasn't anything particularly interesting about the insides of a whale. Sticky, slimy, blue spotted flesh. Wow.
Riku noticed Pinocchio was suddenly beginning to twitch, rapidly and without warning, the spasms wracking his little body. Hiccups. And not a glass of pure water in the whole damn fish. It was going to be a long, long day.
--~~*~~--
OWARI. . . for now. . .
--~~*~~--
Okay, that was a terrible start, but a start nonetheless! (this story is based on comments made by my friends and myself. We love making stories up during actual gameplay. It's fun, seriously. Try it if you have time to waste.)
*waits for story to explode on her* I know, it sucked. It'll get better! Honest! *bashes self on head to get creative juices going* @_@; Owchies. Creativeness hurties my poor wittle bwain. X_x;
(ahem) Review! But please, spare the air. No open flames. ^_^