Week 11

The shake in her hands has grown with the passing weeks, that move like sludge through the cruel realm of time. She doesn't notice, and in fact no one does. The sanctity of life isn't something Stark industries promotes, but more rather the indulgence of selfishness.

Her skin has paled and not enough concealer can hide the ghosts tugging beneath her eyes. From worry, to pain, to anguish — it's as if all emotion has given up trying to push her towards the more positive spectrum and instead has drained from her system completely.

Work turns into procedure. Deliver Obi's coffee, do the paperwork, arrange his meetings, pick up his dry cleaning and leave. Odd jobs are peppered into this compartmentalized schedule she's arranged for herself, and she feels ten years older than she is, like her own life has faded in the time Tony's been gone.

At some point in the afternoon Obadiah requests that she refill his mug (albeit in his condescending niceness) and the toll missing life has taken on her is finally brought to light when her hands shake in the way of the boiling water, which only makes the cup shatter as it falls out of her wobbly - and now burnt - hands.

Silence encompasses the fifteen meter radius around her and everyone is staring at her, she can feel their eyes boring holes through her suit jacket, while she gazes helplessly down at the mess all over her feet and the floor. Oh, and the shards which have managed to sneak into her ankles.

"Miss Potts?" A hand on her arm jolts her out of temporary paralysis and she spins around, cluelessness pooling in her eyes as she faces the new desk girl.

"What?" she asks in a delayed response.

"You're.. um— you're bleeding," the girl now wraps her other arm around Pepper to pull her away from the disaster and she can hear the buzz of whispers, washing over her inner silence like a tidal wave.

It takes a few seconds for her to register that, and another few to register the feeling of the sharp pain building at her ankles.

She knows how to apply bandages herself but having Jane graciously wrap the gauze around her legs, with the distant advice of not walking around in her heels for the next week and a half she wonders when she let other people take care of her.

The girl is a bright young thing, all smiles and care and Pepper feels oddly disconnected from that.

"Thank you," she says after she finishes, and half-heartedly summons an upwards twitch of the lips before she departs.

Obadiah apparently was drawn out of his office by the small commotion and he leans nonchalantly against the wall, watching her limp just slightly, Louboutins in hand.

"Miss Potts, how does an off day sound to you?" his gruff voice almost sounds disappointed, and threatening.

"Oh, no I'm fine—"

"Pepper. Go home. Get some rest. You've been worn out all week, and I'll admit the workload isn't easy. You deserve a break," He nods once in her direction, smiles, and then turns and leaves.

All at once she's filled with disgust; that he palms off her carelessness onto her work responsibility. She limps into her car, tosses her heels to the back and stares at the driver's wheel for far longer than it would take for her to reach home.

Somewhere, miles away, the man she's lost her determination to doesn't even know he's robbed her of meaning.

Week 12

By the time Yinsen's done helping him into his suit the gunmen have already rounded up outside, and the idiot's running out there with a lone gun — does he even know how to aim and fire? — and Tony's left helplessly waiting inside a gigantic tin can and for two short seconds he can't help but feel completely ridiculous.

Faster. He breathes in his misty thoughts to the green bar, filling up at what seems to be the slowest pace one could manage. Faster, dammit.

And then it happens.

Something clicks inside, literally and metaphorically.

Three figures stumble blindly into the darkness of the room and all the power he felt just twelve short weeks ago comes surging back to him in the form of something foreign.

Then there are bullets flying everywhere and the adrenaline in him fires up by tenfold, and each step forward is one step closer to home. It's the best conviction he's found and it's propelling him towards the door so he's doing something right.

He lives for the fear on their faces knowing not long ago it was mirrored on his own.

He lives for the feeling of knowing that for once in this cave, he finally feels alive again.

He finds Yinsen slumped against a pile of sacks, bloodied, beaten and bruised.

"My family's dead," His throat tightens, his saliva turns to cement in his mouth.

"I'm going to see them now Stark. It's okay. It's okay. I want this. I want this,"

His eyes burn but he forces out a puff of air, a laugh of solemn gratitude.

"Thank you for saving me,"

"Don't waste it. Don't waste your life,"

He dies right there and then, and the reality of the situation washes over him once again.

The desert is possibly worse than the cave, an expanse of sand devoid of human life. He misses Yinsen. He misses Pepper.

It's a hazy mirage, or so he thinks it is, the footsteps, the whirring of the copter. The sound of Rhodey's voice - real, tangible - amidst the silence of nowhere.

The smell of military sweat is surreally comforting, and he thinks he could choke to death, float up and see Yinsen, his parents, right now, on tears and the smell of familiarity.

On the ride back he refuses to let Rhodey leave his side. All guns he turns away from, and the only thing his eyes are plastered to is the sight on the other side of glass that is his window.

He fiddles incessantly with Rhodey's sleeve, he shudders against the cool of the glass when they pass back into America, he cries into the pillow cushioning his taught neck when Rhodey's eyes have long fluttered shut.

He breathes emotions that drown him because the smell of cinnamon and vanilla frosting, and hints of lilac is becoming realer with each second.

Author's Note: Don't worry I'll have the final chapter up in a bit, you'll get your pepperony reunion. I'm super sorry this took as long as it had, I had end of year exams, and then I had a competition and several debate trainings and a tournament to get to and well I derailed from marvel and started (and finished) watching House MD. So yeah, but here you guys go! I'll definitely still be writing pepperony in future, but until then R&R is always loved ;-)