ii

Austin sat there, stunned.

The people sat in this tiny bar he'd stumbled across were still applauding their performance, or whatever had just happened, but he could barely hear them. All he could focus on were Ally's curls, disappearing amongst the crowd and seemingly melting into thin air.

He was shaking. Never in a million years had he thought he'd come to New York tonight and come across the girl who had always been his biggest regret.

Remembering himself, and trying to slow his racing heart, Austin grinned at the people sat in front of him, nodding his head.

"Thank you so much," he said, leaning into the microphone again. "This has been fun."

His voice sounded slightly strangled but it was the best he could manage in the present situation. If the people in the bar thought something odd was going on, they were doing a good job of disguising it. The only person that shot him a confused look was the friendly bar owner he'd spoken to earlier, when he'd signed up for the open mic slot. He'd definitely been close enough to catch the moment when Austin and Ally had laid eyes on each other again.

Ally had blushed, making his heart skip a couple of beats, and he'd just stared at her. Thinking about it now, Austin shook his head at himself, as he hopped off the bar stool he'd performed on and headed to the side of the stage for his guitar case. Why had he just stared? Not to mention that the only coherent thing he'd managed to say was her name. He could have smiled, told her it was great to see her, casually slip in that he was still in love with her. Anything. Anything would have been better than what had happened.

"Is everything okay, my boy?" said the owner of the bar, making him jump. "You and my piano player looked like... well, you looked and sounded like you might have done this before."

"We have," Austin replied simply, fixing his guitar inside its well-worn case and extending a hand to the bearlike man. "Thanks for letting me perform. It was great."

With that he picked his guitar up and headed in the direction he'd seen Ally go.

Behind him, the final open mic guest was being introduced, but Austin let the noise wash over him. He would have liked to have listened, having enjoyed all of the performances so far tonight, but something, or rather someone, else, had just taken priority.

Apologising to everyone in the audience he bashed with his guitar, Austin spied a door and headed for it.

"Woah, staff only," a bartender said quietly, sticking a hand out to block him from opening it.

"I just need to speak to Ally," Austin pleaded in a whisper, looking at the guy desperately.

The man frowned at him, then stuck his head round the door to call into what looked like it might be the kitchen.

"Dawson, mystery guitar boy wants to speak to you."

The bartender stepped back from the door, letting it close again and shrugging at him. Austin's stomach dropped. Ally clearly did not want to speak to him. Not that she'd made this anything less than obvious when she'd all but run away from the stage, but he desperately wanted to talk to her again, even just see her.

Austin turned away, but let out a small yelp when someone grabbed his arm and pulled him through the door roughly.

He blinked as the door closed behind him, finding himself face to face with Ally.

She looked at him expectantly, an eyebrow raised, her arms folded.

"I'm at work here, Austin," she said, and for all her tough exterior, her voice was weary. "What do you want?"

Austin pulled his beanie off nervously, running a hand through his flattened hair. He hadn't really thought of what he wanted to say, all he knew was that he wanted to say something. Before he could do anything though, there was a muffled squeal from in the corner, and he realised they weren't alone.

"Oh my god, is this really happening?" a girl said breathlessly, staring at him from a sink full of pots and pans. "Are you, are you-"

"Yes, Bea, he's who you think he is," Ally said sharply, and the girl began to all but hyperventilate. "And he's not that special."

Austin felt like he'd just been winded.

He knew that what he'd done back then had been wrong, but he'd thought four years might have softened her a little.

"Austin, what do you want?" Ally demanded again, tapping her foot. "I know you're some famous rockstar now, but the rest of us have jobs, we're normal, and we don't want to get fired. I have stuff to do."

"I'm sorry," Austin said, tripping over his words. "I er, you were really good on the piano. Thanks for accompanying me."

"You two sounded so great together, do you know each other or something?" Bea asked, her own work happily forgotten. "You sound like you've done it before."

"That's what the bar owner said," Austin grinned.

"My grandad knows his music," Bea nodded, smiling at him shyly.

"Maybe I didn't make myself clear enough, I have stuff to do," Ally interrupted. "If all you wanted to do was compliment me on my piano skills, thank you, and goodbye."

"Ally, what is wrong with you?" Bea snorted, a bemused expression on her face. "You're talking to Austin Moon here. Austin Moon. You can't be mean."

"Oh, really?" she asked harshly, shooting a look at Austin that made his insides curl.

"No," continued Bea, not having noticed the exchange in the dimly lit kitchen. "It's Austin Moon! Everyone loves him."

"Well they shouldn't," Ally said, and her voice cracked.

Her face slipped for a moment, the perfectly constructed expression of indifference she'd been wearing disappearing. For a second, Austin looked into her heartbroken eyes and found himself standing in her practice room four years ago.

Telling her that he was going back on tour. Telling her that he would probably be gone for more than three months this time. Telling her that he shouldn't have kissed her the night before, and told her that he loved her, because he did, he really did, but now he was going to have to leave her.

He'd promised her he wouldn't. She'd stopped him saying those three words, because she didn't want him to say them if they weren't going to be able to work. And he'd promised her that he was here to stay, that he wasn't going anywhere. Promised.

She'd cried. Austin had never seen Ally cry until that day. And he'd been the cause. Austin had broken Ally's heart and with some choice words, Ally had kicked him out of the room they'd made so many memories in and told him not to ever bother coming back to see her.

She loved him too, but she'd told him not to make promises he couldn't keep. And this was why.

And now Ally was here, four years later, and she was still wearing that same expression. She was still feeling the same hurt and anger she had back then.

"Ally," Austin began, his voice agonised. He didn't even know what he could say to make this better. He hadn't been able to think of anything four years ago, on the spot. He had no chance of appeasing her now.

He didn't even know her anymore.

The Ally that he'd left behind was a songwriter, sweet and mild-mannered, not the most confident on stage. And now he was looking at a young woman who played piano in a jazz band, assured and capable of putting him down.

"I was telling the truth," he began. "When I said that stuff before I played the song. If you heard it-"

"I heard it. Look, Austin, I don't even know how you found this place, but why don't we just pretend you never came here, we never saw each other, and you can just hop back on that tour bus and carry on with your life, while I carry on with mine."

"But-"

"Goodbye."

Ally's tone made it pretty clear to Austin where he stood. Sighing, he nodded at her and pulled the familiar beanie over his trademark hair.

"If you could not mention that I was here tonight," he directed at Ally's friend, who was watching the drama unfold between them with an almost gleeful expression. Clearly this was the most exciting thing she'd seen in a while. "No one's really supposed to know that I'm here."

She nodded frantically, and he gave her a thumbs up, his expression still grim. Right now, he didn't care whether she told or not to be honest. Nothing was going to make him feel any worse tonight.

Turning to leave, Austin had one hand on the door when Ally suddenly called his name.

He looked back, surprised, and apparently she was too, a hand over her mouth. Her eyes were wide, as if she'd never meant to say it.

"You were good tonight," she said eventually as he waited to hear what she wanted. The way she blurted out the sentiment suggested to him that she'd planned to say something else, but that was what she was going with.

"So were you," he told her, genuinely meaning it, then attempted to leave again, no interruptions this time.

As the kitchen door closed behind him, he realised the sound he could hear was of her crying.

Feeling wretched, Austin quietly made his way through the rest of the audience and slipped out of the packed jazz bar, enjoying the way the cold wind hit him the moment he stepped outside. Pulling the hat down further over his ears and shoving his hands into his pockets, Austin trudged his way through the streets of New York City, wherever this jazz bar was.

He had no idea where he was going, where he was headed, he just wanted time to think before he went back to the tour bus.

Austin's disappearing act at night was nothing new after all.

Since he'd begun this latest tour, Austin had been heading out to open mic nights at local bars whenever he could. The six month tour he'd gone on after leaving Ally had been hard enough, but this latest one was worldwide. He'd already been on the road for four months, and between holidays, travelling and making time to write songs for his next album, the tour was expected to last a year or so.

Although Austin loved his job, and wouldn't trade it for the world, it got a little overwhelming at times. Nowadays, the show was so big, with so many theatrics, that the music got a little lost at times, amongst the performance. Fans were more there just to see him than to listen to him sing.

Austin missed the music. He didn't have a practice room belonging to the pretty girl at the local music shop to escape to anymore. Singing on the tour bus was usually out of the question, because after listening to the same songs night after night, his crew were happy to take a break from Austin's voice. He never got a chance to just play music nowadays.

The idea to stop by local bars had first popped into his head when he'd spotted an ad for an open mic night in the window of a late-night coffee place somewhere. The city hadn't been important, but the idea had been.

They'd played two shows there before moving on, and on the second night, once the concert had ended, Austin had slipped away to hunt the cafe down again. He told his tour manager that he was just going for a walk, and that he'd be totally fine. Made up some lie about writing songs best when he was alone with his thoughts. Truth was, Austin's greatest songs hadn't been written when he was alone at all.

Pulling on a hat, he'd figured it was unlikely that anyone in attendance at a coffee shop open mic night would recognise him, especially if he was going to sing with just his guitar.

The first time he'd done it had been terrifying and liberating. He'd decided to play some of his old songs, figuring they were less well-known by now, but spent most of the song afraid that he'd forget the lyrics. Fortunately the words came to him even when he wasn't expecting them to, and he realised that if he just carried on playing, his subconscious would provide him with the lyrics without him even noticing. Instead he could focus on actually playing his guitar, with skill, rather than just the odd parts of songs he accompanied on stage. And when Austin had settled into it, he'd found himself enjoying it. Really enjoying it. Remembering why he loved music in the first place. The applause had been exciting, because for the first time in a long time, people were praising him for his talent, rather than clapping because they had to.

That night had sparked something in him. He'd since hunted down low-key, relatively unknown open mic nights whenever he could, trying to get round the music genre issue with his smile and his songs. Tonight had been a jazz bar, but last night had been a folk night, and last week he'd chilled in a country venue for a few sessions. As long as he went nowhere he stood a good chance of being recognised, he was fine.

Austin's tour performances had never been so electric, and he found himself improving as an artist after listening to the other open mic acts. He listened to what the lyrics were saying, or what that chord progression was, or whether he could play around with that riff in one of his own songs. Open mic nights inspired him.

Tonight had been a little different though.

Austin sighed, shaking his head as he went back through the events that had transpired. The worst part was that despite what had happened afterwards, he couldn't help feeling giddy over the fact he'd performed with Ally again, and they hadn't lost it, at all. There was still something there.

He'd left her again though. They'd performed a song together, sprinkled magic over their audience, and then he'd just made her cry again.

Just like last time.

Austin came to an abrupt halt in his wandering of the streets.

He wasn't even sure of where he was headed, but suddenly knew that any direction other than the one from which he'd come was entirely wrong. Night had well and truly fallen by now, the harsh orange streetlights guiding his way back across the dark, hard sidewalk. The roads were deserted, which was probably for the best. A man running around with a guitar strapped to his back would possibly have attracted attention.

If he'd had enough breath, Austin would have cursed at himself. Why had he left? He should have just waited outside for her. Like he was ever realistically going to have been able to get on that bus and drive away somewhere leaving things at that. The night had been wrapping up, it wouldn't have been long until she'd finished her shift. He groaned, praying she hadn't already gone home.

He was an idiot. He'd been in love with this girl for four years, and he wasn't about to lose her again now that he'd found her.

This is going to make one hell of a song, he thought idly as he ran.

Trusting his feet to know where they were going, and pretty sure he'd just walked in a straight line anyway, Austin ran, his head a jumbled mess. Ahead of him he could see a huddle of people standing outside what looked like the little bar, starting to disperse. Relieved that he'd somehow, miraculously found his way back, Austin saw no other option.

"Ally!" he cried at the top of his lungs, his voice echoing around the empty streets.

Every single one of the employees turned to his voice, most of them wearing surprised expressions. Austin hardly spared them a glance though, his attention entirely focused on the shocked face of one Ally Dawson.

She looked for a moment like she might just walk away, but suddenly her expression softened and he caught the most beautiful smile in the world, even if it was just for a fleeting second.

Austin flew over to her, panting heavily but relieved that he'd managed to find her.

"Oh to be young and in love again," the bar owner laughed from somewhere behind them, his voice deep and booming even without a microphone.

"I'm expecting all of the details tomorrow," the girl Austin had met earlier called to Ally, not caring that Austin could hear what she was saying.

Slowly the rest of the staff drifted away, even the pull of a romantic drama not enough to keep them from their warm beds gone one in the morning.

Eventually Austin got his breath back, and straightened out, looking down at Ally, whose eyes were full of questions.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, looking up at him curiously.

"I couldn't leave you again, not like this," he explained, drinking in every last detail of her appearance, so he could savour it in the future.

The way she'd taken the highlights out of her hair, so it was all one glossy brown colour, or the way she'd cut it a little shorter again, like it was the first time he'd met her. The leather jacket she was wearing that made him go weak at the knees, but underneath was the cute kind of dress he was used to. The fact she was wearing just a little more mascara nowadays, and it was currently smudging in the rain.

Suddenly becoming aware of his surroundings again, Austin blinked.

"It's raining," he stated, and Ally smiled in spite of herself.

"Well done, genius."

Not knowing what to do but feeling like he had to be a gentleman somehow, Austin pulled his hat off and placed it on Ally's head, regretting it when he realised she looked better in it than he ever did.

"Thanks," she said dryly, raising an eyebrow but adjusting it to be comfy all the same. "Austin, why- why did you come back? I thought I made things pretty clear before."

"I left you behind crying. I'm not making the same mistake twice," he told her.

Her brow furrowed, and she closed her eyes for a second. Austin hoped it was because her stomach was as twisted as his was.

"Austin," she began, scrunching her nose as if she was trying to figure out how to say what she wanted to. "It's sweet that you came back for me, but I don't have anything to really say to you. We lead two very separate, very different lives now, and I haven't forgotten how our friendship ended."

"Ally, I'm so sorry, " Austin said, looking her straight in the eyes. "I really am. Please can we talk? Just for a little while? I never thought I'd see you again. I can't leave you now without at least-"

"I don't think that's such a good idea," she said apologetically, cutting him off. "I'm tired, and I should be off home, and I'm sure you have somewhere to be too."

"Exactly," Austin nodded. "I do. Tomorrow morning, me and the band are headed somewhere else again. We're probably never going to see each other again. So please just give me this one night. Please."

"One night for what? What do you even want?"

"To apologise properly, to find out what you've been up to, to figure out what's going through your head, all sorts."

"Why is it that important?" Ally sighed.

"Because it's you," Austin said simply. "And you've always been important."

"Austin," she said, looking like she was going to cry again. He panicked. That hadn't been the idea at all.

"Okay, fine, if you can tell me truthfully that you really don't care about me anymore, that you've totally moved on with your life, I'll leave you alone. I'll walk away right now. But if not, just let me spend a few hours with you, Ally, please. It's one night. And then I'll be gone anyway."

Ally chewed her lip, blinking the light rain out of her eyes. She hadn't exactly expected any sort of reunion with Austin to take place in the early hours of the morning in a deserted city street, but here they were. And as she looked up at him, at the face that hadn't changed in four years, she knew she couldn't lie to him.

"Of course I still care about you," she said finally. His face split into a grin.

"So you'll talk to me for a bit? Catch up?"

"You can walk me home to my apartment," she reasoned with him. "And once we get there, you leave. Deal?"

"How far away is your apartment?"

"Twenty minutes."

Austin's face fell for a moment, but the expression soon passed, realising that twenty minutes with her was better than nothing at all.

"Deal," he nodded with a sigh, knowing it was the best he was going to get.

They began heading in the direction of Ally's apartment, both a little unsure of themselves. Austin was faced with the same situation as before; he had Ally's attention, and he knew he had to say something, but there was nothing he could say. Realistically he knew that he just wanted to ask her to drop everything, join him on tour, and stay with him forever, but that was probably not the best approach.

"So do you have a boyfriend?" he asked confidently, grinning at her.

Ally looked up at him with wide eyes.

"That seems a little personal," she said, sounding taken aback. "I thought you wanted to know how I'd been."

"Fine, how have you been?"

"Great, thanks."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Austin," Ally groaned, starting to remember how arrogant he could be at times.

"You may as well answer me," he shrugged, his smile wide. Now that he had Ally's attention, he was going to use it to his full advantage. "You get rid of me in a few minutes."

"And what makes you think I'll tell you the truth?" she countered.

"Because you're you. And you'll always tell me the truth, no matter how much you hate me."

"I don't hate you," she sighed. "Strong dislike, maybe."

He nudged her and she giggled.

"So answer me."

"Were you always this persistent? No, I don't have a boyfriend. Are you happy now?"

"Most definitely," Austin smiled, and Ally didn't have the energy to ask him whether he was happy at the fact she'd answered, or the answer itself. "Have you had any other boyfriends since school?"

"No way, we're going one for one here," Ally protested. "If you get to ask questions, I get to ask questions too."

"Is that so?" Austin teased, looking down at her and enjoying seeing her smile again.

"It is. So do you have a girlfriend?" she smirked.

"No, I don't have a girlfriend. Happy?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," she said airily, and Austin's stomach did a double flip.

"How did you end up at a jazz bar?" was his next question.

"I needed a job, and it kind of stuck," she shrugged, and he was pleased to hear the happiness in her voice. As long as she was happy, he was happy. "How did you end up at a jazz bar? I think that's the real question here."

"Are you going to keep repeating what I ask you?"

"My question first."

"Fine, I've been playing open mic nights for a while. I miss performing."

"Austin, you're on a tour," Ally said dryly. "You perform every night."

"Okay, I miss singing. Like, really singing. Just getting lost in a song."

Ally looked up at him, and Austin smiled at her. He was starting to feel less and less like they were walking down a dark NYC street in drizzling rain, and instead like they were leaning across the counter talking to one another at the shop in Miami again.

"That's sweet. In answer to your question, yes I'll keep repeating what you ask, you're asking good questions."

"That was not my question!" Austin protested.

"Should've thought about it more carefully then, shouldn't you?" Ally laughed.

"Have you always been this annoying?" he muttered.

"Yes," she answered definitively, sticking her tongue out.

They went back and forth like this for a long time, Ally's hesitancy at talking to him slowly fading away. He'd still broken her heart, and she wouldn't forget that, but tonight he came back for her, and that meant something to her. She had to be careful though. This conversation was nothing more than what it was. Neither of them could fool themselves into thinking otherwise, because Ally couldn't go through that again.

Eventually enough time passed for Austin to break out of his Ally bubble momentarily and notice the graffiti they'd passed three times now. His sudden break in focusing solely on her was accompanied by noticing that at some point they'd started holding hands, and that he wasn't ready to let go yet.

"Ally," he said, interrupting whatever she'd been saying. "Are you lost? I think we've walked in circles."

"Busted," she mumbled, looking up at him sheepishly. "I'm sorry. We got to my apartment, and you were right in the middle of that story about the fan who followed you to your hotel room. And then the next time I was telling you about Trish's new job. And the time after that, I just didn't want to stop talking to you."

She stopped them in their tracks, looking up at him apologetically.

"Don't be sorry," he told her, taking her other hand. "I don't want to stop talking to you either."

"We probably should say goodbye at some point though," she sighed. "It's going to get light soon, and I have places to be in the morning. My apartment's just down the road."

She let go of both his hands and started walking, shoving her hands into her pockets and keeping her head down.

"Ally," Austin called, catching up with her easily.

She carried on walking for a moment, eventually pausing outside the entrance to an apartment block. He guessed this was it then.

"Will you answer one last question?" he asked, as she turned to look up at him.

"I guess."

"Do you promise to ask me the same question again?"

"I don't really do promises," she told him in a hard voice.

"Just this once," he said, feeling guilty.

"What's the question?"

"Do you still love me?"

Ally blinked at him, then threw her head back and groaned, marching a few steps away.

"Okay, that wasn't the response I expected," he said nervously, walking over to her. "Problem?"

"Yes, there's a problem," Ally told him, shaking her head.

"Do you not want to answer?"

"That isn't the problem."

"Then what is the problem?"

"I don't want you to answer."

Austin stepped closer to her, catching her hands again.

"Why?" he asked softly, leaning in to her a little.

"Don't do that," she sighed.

The rain had died down to a trickle by now, and a few of the streetlights had gone out, so they were dimly lit. Ally could only see one side of Austin's face, the other hidden in shadow, but she didn't need to be able to see him to know what he was thinking. She could hear it in his voice.

Resolve crumbling a little, Ally began to move closer to him too, but as she did, she remembered the time it had taken her to move on from this boy last time, and she could not do that again.

Pulling away, Ally slid Austin's beanie off her soft curls and pressed it to his chest, not wanting to look at him. It was enough to tell him how she felt; no words were needed.

Of course she still loved him. And she didn't need him to remind her that he still loved her too. It couldn't work though. Not while Austin was still touring, and not while Ally was trying to figure out what she should be doing with her life. So they'd have to put their feelings aside, as always, and maybe hope that they'd find themselves outside Ally's apartment in the rain some other time. Some other time, when this could work.

"Keep it," he said with a heavy voice, realising she wanted him to leave now.

"It's yours, I can't keep it. Don't you like it?"

"I love it," he nodded. "It's my favourite hat. So if you hang on to it, one day I'll have to come back for it. I pr-"

"Don't make me another promise, Austin," she said sadly, gripping the soft, grey material which stood for so much more.

"Okay, I'll come back for it... I pinky swear?"

Ally giggled, and his face brightened for a moment.

"You know if you break a pinky swear, I have to break your finger?"

"Better than me breaking your heart," Austin said solemnly. "Ally, you know I'm sorry, right? If I never see you again, never hear from you again, if you forget everything we said tonight, please just remember that."

"Okay," she nodded, stepping towards him again to give him a hug.

He wrapped his arms round her tightly, wishing they could stay like this for days, Ally in his arms, nothing else really mattering.

"Thank you for coming back," she smiled, as she pulled away and began walking towards the door. "I'm sorry that I wouldn't speak to you at work. I was shocked, and I've spent so many years angry at you. If you hadn't come back, I'd still be like that."

"But now?"

"Now I know you're sorry. And that you're happy. And that one day you'll be back," she said, waving the hat at him that she was still holding on to for dear life.

"Don't forget me, Ally," he called, as he started to walk back up the street.

"As long as you don't forget me, Austin," she replied, waving him a goodbye.

She watched him all the way up the street, watched as he turned the corner with one final wave, and then he was gone again. She stayed out there for another ten minutes, just holding his hat, watching the spot where he'd disappeared, until she finally turned to head inside, her heart lighter and heavier than it had been in years.

A/N: And here's the second part. Sorry for the delay! I'm pretty bad with giving my favourite pairings angsty endings, but it felt like it fit with the story. I already have a plan for a new A&A fic, which will include much happier parts! A huge thank you again to the downright awesome Got2LiveItBigTime who read over both parts of this story before I posted them. Hope you enjoyed this fic, and thank you so much for reading! Also I could do with some love today, so let me know what you thought? :)