Natasha and Steve had a 'friends with benefits' arrangement. Natasha had set a rule- absolutely no emotions involved. But here she was, breaking her own rule.

It had been one crappy mission, and all she wanted was to be left alone. Steve had taken note of her pissy mood, and when no one was looking, followed her up to her floor. She ignored him when he first knocked on her door.

The second time he knocked, Natasha threw open the door, irritation written across her face.

"What do you-"

Steve hugged Natasha. Now, normally, if someone hugged her that wasn't Clint, she'd rip their arms off. But this was Steve, and it was actually quite comforting. Against her will, Natasha melted into the embrace. Something sparked inside her, and she knew Steve cared about her, and not just because they were fuck buddies.

This was when Natasha first realized she was in love with Steve Rogers.

A day later, Steve was being whisked away for a mission. Natasha had made up her mind to confess her feelings before he left, and as she rode the elevator to his floor, her confidence failed her rapidly.

She walked into his room just as he finished packing. When he looked at her, Steve gave her a lopsided grin.

"Hey Tasha." he said, zipping up his suitcase.

"Hi."

Natasha stood there for a minute, trying to gain her courage. Steve noticed her silence.

"You okay?" He asked, resting a hand on her shoulder.

"Steve, I-I love you."

He looked down at Natasha, who looked down at the floor. Using his hand, he lifted her chin up. He pressed his lips to hers, and suddenly the world dissipated. It was just Natasha and him, which Steve was okay with.

They pulled apart, and he muttered against her lips. "I love you to."

It had been one week since that happened. Natasha was getting reckless, her widow mask slipping more and more each passing minute. When Steve was declared M.I.A., Natasha's facade crumbled even more, and the others could see just how worried and upset she was.

After week two, he was declared KIA. Natasha broke completely.

It wasn't until the group stumbled across Natasha sitting alone in the kitchen, singing to herself, did they realize just what she was feeling.

"Sometimes life seems too quiet
Into paralyzing silence
Like the moonless dark
Meant to make me strong

Familiar breath of my old lies
Changed the color in my eyes
Soon he will perforate the fabric of the peaceful by and by

Sorrow lasts through this night
I'll take this piece of you
And hope for all eternity
For just one second I felt whole
As you flew right through me

Left alone with only reflections of the memory
To face the ugly girl that's smothering me
Sitting closer than my pain
He knew each tear before it came
Soon He will perforate the fabric of the peaceful by and by

Sorrow last through this night
I'll take this piece of You
And hope for all eternity
For just one second I felt whole
As You flew right through me

And we kiss each other one more time
And sing this lie that's halfway mine
The sword is slicing through the question
So I won't be fooled by his angel light

Sorrow lasts through this night
I'll take this piece of you
And hope for all eternity
For just one second I felt whole
As you flew right through me
And up into the stars"

She stopped singing, tears threatening to fall. The others stood still, being very quiet. If Natasha knew they had listened, she would kill them.

Natasha stood and roughly wiped her eyes, her lip trembling. Her head shot up when they heard the elevator dinging open. Completely forgetting about trying to be sneaky, the group rushed to see who it was.

Steve Rogers stood there, his uniform ruined. His blonde hair looked brown from the dirt/dust that covered his whole body. He looked exhausted, his posture slouched.

"Steve!"

They watched as Natasha ran into his arms and give him a loving kiss. They sort of expected for Steve to pull away, but were very surprised to see him kiss her back. When they pulled apart, Natasha laid her head on his chest.

"I thought I'd lost you..."

Everyone stood there, and, of course, Tony was first to say anything.

"You and Capsicle? When did this start happening?"

Bruce whacked Tony. Natasha gave a slight smile- her first smile in weeks.

A/N

So, this is a sad-ish one-shot. Deal with the feels.

I don't own the song used, unfortunately. The song is titled Sorrow and belongs to Flyleaf (I suggest listening to that while you read the sad part.)

~Queen of Derp