THIS IS PROBABLY THE DUMEST AND MOST WEIRD THING IVE EVER WROTE. But it only took me like five minutes, ah well. Please let me know what you think. Ta.

"Mulder, no!" Scully giggled as she took in the sight of him.

"Oh c'mon, Scully, I know how much you love neon yellow!" Mulder responded with a cheeky grin, placing his hands on his hips and wiggling them slightly.

Three weeks ago, Scully had accidentally picked up a box of glow in the dark condoms, rather than the normal ones, when she was doing the weekly shop. It was only when she and Mulder were beneath the throws that the pair of them got the shock of their lives.

It had been funny though. They'd incorporated them into their sex lives. More often than Scully would have liked, Mulder would swish his hips freely and make light sabre noises as his glowing shaft flapped freely.

Mulder was a big enough child as it was, without his penis looking like a glowstick.

"I thought we said no more ones that glow in the dark" Scully said, trying to make her voice sound stern. Which, was hard as Mulder was, as usual, swishing his member around and grinning like a child as he watched the glowing thing move in the dimly lit bedroom. "Mulder can you stop that" Scully narrowed her eyes. "Mulder, seriously! If you make one more light sabre noise you'll be flying Hans Solo for the rest of your life!"

"*zoooo-*" Mulder stopped and pouted slightly.

Okay, maybe he had turned what was an intimate and beautiful thing between them into a slightly childish and weird place with the glowing condoms. And maybe when he hummed the Star Wars theme as he entered her the other week was less than intimate.

But hey, it was Scully who suggested it looked like a tractor beam when he had a bright green one on.

Scully couldn't help the grin that tugged on the corners of her lips. As ridiculous as he looked with that neon yellow thing all but pointing in her face, he looked super adorable. Especially with that little pout.

She could read the man like a book and knew that he was busting at the seems to continue... whatever it was he had just been doing. She quirked her brow at him knowingly and he just shrugged.

"Fine" she sighed. "Get it all out of your system!" Mulder grinned broadly and made one more light sabre noise before diving onto the bed and attacking her collar bone with his lips.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him closer, breathing heavily as he moved his lips up to her neck, leaving a burning trail of kisses in his wake.

"I mean what I said, Mulder" Scully said breathlessly. "No more glow in the dark ones"

"Okay, okay" Mulder replied, his voice muffled by her jaw. His hot breath washed over her skin and elicited a low, guttural moan of pleasure as every inch of her skin ignited.

He felt her squeeze her thighs against him, the tell tale sign that she was done waiting and she wanted him now. He toyed with the idea of teasing her some more, but he didn't think he would be able to hold out much longer himself if he did.

A sly grin appeared on his lips as he obliged to her wishes.

"*dun dun dun dun-*"

"-Mulderrrrrrr!"