Author's Note: I'm sorry for how long this chapter took and how short it is. When I started this story I was on vacation from work, so I just wrote as much as I could, but with my promotion I won't be able to write as much or as quickly but I won't abandon this story. It will probably take me much longer and the updates might be once every few days or once a month, but I will continuously be working on it.

Now, to answer some questions.

Is Death from Deadpool? Yes it is. It came down to Deadpool's Death or Supernatural's Death, and while Supernatural's would have been fun, having an omnipotent being flirt with Harry was to good an opportunity to pass up.

What will happen to the Dursleys? I haven't decided yet. We can see a bit of Petunia's feelings in this chapter, but Vernon and Dudley are still to come. And the Blacks haven't even gotten to them yet.

Why isn't Dumbledore a Manipulative Bastard? Because I didn't feel like writing that to be honest. The Evil! or Manipulative! Dumbledore stories are getting old in my opinion. A Dumbledore who realizes how stretched he is and the mistakes he has made is much more interesting to me.

Why doesn't Harry own Hogwarts? Because other factors will be coming into play over Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. If I just gave someone complete and total control there wouldn't be as much of a story at Hogwarts and I'd be focusing on the Ministry of Magic instead.

Where are Draco and Lucius Malfoy's reactions? They'll be coming up later.

Dementors to be Sorted at Hogwarts!

By: Rita Skeeter

Riding on the back of the travesty that was the Quidditch Cup Opening Ceremony, the Ministry of Magic held a press conference on the ongoing matter of Sirius Black. While there were no comments on the standing of Black's questionable guilt, the Ministry seems to be doing all it can to end the this debate once and for all. Sirius Black, on orders of the Minister Cornelius Oswald Fudge, has received a Kiss On Sight order for the Dementors. How will these Dementors be finding Mr. Black? By joining your children at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!

"We, your Ministry of Magic, will not take part in the debate of Sirius Black's innocence or guilt," the Minister says. "Black is a deranged individual, seeking only his former master's bidding. Mr. Pott- er - Lord Peverell is new to our world and does not understand the practice of our justice system. For his, and all your children's safety, this year Hogwarts will be playing host to a contingent of Dementors, one hundred strong. They will find Black, Kiss him, and then all this nonsense about his innocence will be forgotten."

Dementors, for my readers who don't know, are Dark Creatures who feed on misery and despair. They make their victims relive their worst memories before performing their most destructive ability, the Dementor's Kiss. The Kiss is a the last thing victims can identify in this world as their souls are literally sucked out of their bodies through their mouths. This leaves the unfortunate being left as nothing more than a brain dead inmate, surviving on our taxes at St. Mungos.

Reports state that Albus Dumbledore is not happy with the inclusion of Dementors on his school's roster for the year and he has been seen meeting with Minister Fudge and his Senior Undersecretary on several occasions throughout the day trying to stop it. However, the Minister seems to be standing firm on its position.

Bellatrix Black, one of Lord Peverell's three upcoming brides has this to say. "I don't know what is going through the mind of the Minister to put so many children at risk. Dementors do not care about innocence, guilt or who gets in their way so long as they get to feed. When word reached us about the press conference, we had to take a long time to decide whether or not to put ourselves and our betrothed in danger by returning to Hogwarts this year. In the end, it was decided that we would be returning if for no other reason than to stand as barrier between the Dementors and the children who would so easily fall prey to those nightmares."

Amelia Bones, Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement agreed with Miss. Black. "While the Ministry has always provided a united front, this is going to far," she says. "The Department Heads have been over ruled in this matter though and the Minister is well within his rights to make such a bold move on the Ministry's behalf. However, one thing he cannot do is halt an investigation and we at the DMLE are hard at work on the case of Sirius Black and his missing questioning and trial."

So, my loyal readers, you're favorite reporter can only question the sanity of our Minister at this stage. Will you quietly sit back and allow our children to be treated like the prisoners of the most feared prison under Britain's control or will you let your voices be heard? There will be more reports to come as the continuously escalating case of Sirius Black continues.

Quidditch Cup Opening Ceremony Ends In Disaster

by: Spee D. Reeder

Tragedy struck yesterday's Quidditch Cup Opening, held this year in the Hoia-Baciu Woods of Romania, that rendered hundreds physically wounded as thousands stampeded from the stadium. It wasn't the first time the Mascots caused such a devastating reaction but this weekends opening was the worst we've seen in living memory. In order to show their dominating team spirit, no less than three dragons were used as mascots at the colorful festival and show that precedes the World Cup Series. England who has a long-standing tradition of using Golden Snidgets for their mascots decided to bring a ferocious and nesting Hiberdian Black.

This may not have been an issue if not for the Transylvanian team had brought a Romanian Longhorn and Peru came ready with a Peruvian Vipertooth. Everything might have gone well if not for the actions of a lone wizard, one Derrick Jeeters. Mr. Jeeters in a display of magic that many found well beyond the man's capabilities, managed to either kill or stun all the handlers for the three titanic beasts before setting them free. After his campaign to free the dragons was successful he soon found himself as their first victim. After he was burned and torn to shreds by the dragons, they began to fight over his remains, a fight that spilled into the stadium where a mass riot for safety began.

While we may never know what prompted Mr. Jeeters to free the dragons, some eye-witnesses have stepped forward. "It was like he was possessed," Mary Heartbright says. "I've never seen him like that before. He usually doesn't laugh maniacally or wear silly blue fedoras to cover his head. It was while the dragons were fighting over his body though that I saw it, a black smoke thing just lifted up out of his head and took off into the forest."

"Like, I knew these woods were haunted," an American named Mr. Norville Rodgers says. Mr. Rodgers had seen fit to enjoy the opening scene with his Crup-Great Dane hybrid for the talking dog's birthday. "The Veela were fine and the food was awesome, haha," Mr. Rodgers continues nervously, "but then I saw the Black Smoke Monster. Like, we ran to my old van and hid for the rest of the ceremony!"

When asked to comment on the strange turn of events the Ministry Spokeswoman and Senior Undersecretary of the Minister, Deloris Umbridge had this to say. "What transpired at the World Cup Opening was a tragedy but the Minister and the British Ministry cannot be held accountable for the losses suffered on foreign soil at the hands of a madman. We are focused on the capture of Sirius Black not some made up boogieman in a forest somewhere. Mr. Jeeters paid for his crimes and that is all we have to say on the matter."

So what did happen at the Opening? Was it the work of a lone man who wanted to see lives lost or dragons freed? Or, was he possessed by the spirit that is said to roam the Hoia-Baciu Woods, feeding on its victims and leaving a trail of withered corpses in its wake? The Daily Prophet will stay on the case until this mystery is solved! Tomorrow though, the games will begin as Japan takes on the Union of Soviet Magical Republics.

Harry sat across from one of the three women most feared throughout England by its Dark, Light and Neutral supporters. Bellatrix's wand danced in her fingers like a baton as she absentmindedly went through the boy's homework from the past two years of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Judging by the growing snarl on the woman's lips she was not happy with what she was seeing in the lease. "Are you to tell me that you, at the ages of eleven and twelve, twice fought the Dark Lord with this being the accumulation of your knowledge," she practically hissed.

The poor wizard who was wiggling in the comfortable chair he had been provided could somewhat understand her outrage. His first year he had been taught by Quirrell, the man pretended to stutter all year-long and the constant headaches Harry had received in that class due to how close he was to Voldemort had only made things worse since he couldn't focus. His second year, surprisingly, had been worse than the first. Lockhart had been a joke from the beginning making them study the tales of other, greater wizards, while writing sonnets to the man about his false heroics.

"I didn't use my wand either time," Harry finally said with a shrug. That news made Bella's eyes widen in shock at her future husband. "The first time I ki...I took out Quirrell with my bare hands. The second time Riddle had my wand the entire time I battled the Basilisk with the Sword of Gryffindor. At this rate, I'm starting to get more annoyed with him and the fact everyone keeps shuddering at his name than anything else." He didn't say it as if he was bragging but more as just a statement.

The raven-haired witch stared at the boy sitting across from her in stunned silence. He thought the Dark Lord was more of an annoyance than an actual threat? Tom Riddle had taught her everything she knew about the Dark Arts and had turned her into a fighter that was second to only himself and Albus Dumbledore and Harry Bloody Potter admitted to taking him out twice without a wand, three times if one counted the original defeat as a toddler. "Be that as it may be," she said finally, "you are behind, exceedingly in what you should have been taught. Tell me, what defensive and offensive spells do you know."

"Flipendo, Incendio, Locomotor Wibbly, Locomotor Mortis, Petrificus Totalus, Titillando, Serpentsorcia, Furnunculus, Colloshoo," he began listing them off marking each one with a finger. "I did learn Expelliarmus last year after watching Snape use it on Lockhart. It looked like a descent spell."

"Only if your dueling not fighting," Bellatrix said with a shake of her head. "While many wizards are useless without a wand exceptional wizards can call their wands back to their hands. Tom Riddle is one such wizard," she said explained. "Today, we'll be focusing on something a bit more difficult," she instructed, standing to her feet. "This will not be a spell to use lightly and it is not something to use for everyday measures. I'll be teaching you the Gubraithian Fire charm, a spell that will set anything on fire forever," she lectured. "If one wanted to compare it to Fiendfyre, it would be like comparing the Cruciatus Curse to the Killing Curse."

Harry blinked in confusion and politely raised his hand. Seeing it, Bella rolled her eyes. "Speak up, this isn't a formal class room," she said.

"Well, it's just that I've never heard of Fiendfyre or the Cruciatus Curse or even the Killing Curse before," he said with a confused look on his face. He saw her watching him as if expecting that his words were a prank of some sort before sighing when he didn't so much as crack a smile.

"Great, I am marrying an idiot," she muttered before turning to face him. "Fiendfyre is a powerful fire spell one of the most ones in existence. Instead of air it consumes magic and will burn anything with magic away in mere seconds. The Cruciatus is the torture curse, it has no other function than to cause unimaginable pain on those it is cast upon and is one of the three Unforgivable Curses that will get you a life sentence in Azkaban if used on a person," she said. "The most damning of the three is the Killing Curse, Avada Kedavra, its effect is rather self-explanatory," she said with a long look at the boy that made him squirm again. "Only one person has ever survived the Killing Curse. You."

Harry stared at his future bride in surprise for a moment before his anger swell up. "Why the hell didn't anyone tell me," he nearly shouted as he jumped to his feet. "That might have been something I should know about! I thought the Dark Tosser hit me with a damn cutting curse or something," he said gesturing to his faded lightning shaped scar. "How am I still alive if he hit me with something that just kills things? The only person to tell me anything about that night was Hagrid and he just said that I must have stumped him. It didn't make sense than either! I was one for crying out loud how was supposed to have beat Voldemort and a Killing Curse? I couldn't even pee in a toilet yet!"

"Stop shouting!" The voice of Bellatrix cut through his own, making him bite his lip to keep quiet. The raven-haired witch had watched wide eyed as the boy's rage fueled his magic and caused it to lash out. She had never seen a thirteen year old use accidental magic, and she had never it literally shake a room. The distant crash of something told her it wasn't just the room he was causing to shake either. "I have no clue how you survived and I have no control over who told you anything or what you bothered to look up on your own," she growled as she narrowed her eyes, which had turned an unsettling shade of violet on the wizard. "However, you will show some sense of control over yourself and stop screaming at me or I swear to Morgana that I'll blast you, got it?"

Harry's emerald eyes narrowed at the raven-haired woman and the wand in her hand. "Don't tell me what to do," he growled as he flicked his wrist, his wand sliding from its holster on his forearm into his hand and begin shooting red sparks toward the Persian Rug that had once belonged to the original Sirius Black. "I'm sick to death of people telling me what to do," he said in a quiet voice. "I'm tired of them telling me what to feel, who to show respect for and being told to suck it up when ever I do something that causes the majority of this twisted backwards world of yours to turn its back on me."

The messy-haired boy's wand arm stayed at his side but his eyes looked ready to start slinging curses of their own. "Your world keeps telling me what I should do or how I should act just because you've all put me on some sort of pedestal," he said angrily. "Now, I don't even get the same right to find love that the rest of the world has to find someone I love to get married too. I'm forced to marry you and your sisters and all you care about using me to achieve your ends just like everyone else. Well guess what Bella, I don't have to marry you," he growled. "I'll be quite happy to die a muggle on my fourteenth birthday because at least them I can find some rest and be reunited with my parents."

The dark-haired witch stared at the boy with her heavy hooded eyes for a long moment before she nodded as though please. "Good, you can stop with the theatrics now," she said calmly. "Your lack of knowledge is not entirely your fault and lays at the feet of those who should have prepared you. I am glad that you know how to play the game at least and but not the resolve to carry it through. That threat had more far reaching consequences than you probably realized. If you were to follow through, not only would the House of Potter fall but so would the House of Black and probably the rest of our society if you really are the only thing keeping the Dark Lord at bay. Congratulations."

"Wai-what," Harry asked in confusion as his anger drained away in shock. He had just threatened to kill himself and take Bella and her sisters with him and she had seemed... pleased?

"I've spent the last few days studying you. I listened to the stories you told Rita and thought them over carefully," she said with a smirk. "You went after the Philosopher's Stone so that Riddle would get it and rise again. Your main motivation in stopping him though was to protect your friends from his return. In your second year you went alone to fight a basilisk to save some girl you didn't even know simply because it was the right thing to do. You know how to threaten someone, Potter, but you don't have it in you to leave someone to die," she explained. "Your threat was empty but I suppose a talk is in order."

Harry watched as she walked across the room and calmly took her seat as if it was a throne. "Your arguments, while they seem valid to you, are stupid," she said bluntly. "You don't like being treated like a child, well to bad, you are a child even if you are to get married. We adults have lived longer than you and understand how our society, yes your society as well, works. We lived through the bulk of the last war while you are fighting what remains, admirable, shocking, but not all together impressive.

"You want to get married for love, well that's to bad. Thanks to your father and my cousin we're stuck together and will just have to deal with that. The best part about arranged marriages though is that both sides gets something out of it. I will become Minister for Magic, Narcissa will gain control of Hogwarts through the Board of Governors, and Andy wants to see the world, so once I'm Minister I'll see what I can do about moving Crouch somewhere else giving her his job. You will get children at some point I imagine," she said with a huff, like her baby sister not at all keen at ruining her figure. "That will let you have the family you so eagerly desire."

The young wizard slumped in defeat. He knew Bella was right even if he didn't want to admit it to anyone including himself. "Fine, I guess I can understand that," he conceded. "I guess we should get on with the lesson," he said hoping to get out of the presence of the woman sitting in front of him like a queen looking down on a subject.

"Very well," Bellatrix said as she stood once more and kept her dark blue eyes on the boy. "As I was saying the Gubraithian Fire charm is similar to the Cruciatus in that both cause continuous pain while Fiendfyre and the Killing Curse are almost instant death. The spell was created by Gubraith, a pyromaniac in the fourteen hundreds who devised the spell to be fed by the targets own magic. In short, a person the spell was cast on would burn for all time with their own magical reserves keeping the flames alive."

Bella was surprised to see a glint of something almost cruel appear in the eyes of the boy she was teaching. "So, if Riddle ever got his body back, I'd be able to use this spell on him," he asked carefully.

"That's why I'm teaching it to you," she said with a shake of her head at the wizard's thick head. "Now, the incantation is ..."

Remus John Lupin was naturally wary when he had received a summons to the Department of Magical Law Enforcement that morning. He really should have seen it coming, he decided, after all he was the only Marauder still alive apart from Siri- Black, and they would be questioning him eventually. That was how he found himself in his current predicament, sitting in a hard chair across from the intimidating Auror and once good friend Mad-Eye Moody and his young apprentice Nymphadora Tonks, as well as Amelia Bones, head of the Department.

"Mr. Lupin, I thank you for coming out so quickly," Madam Bones said with hard eyes directed at the shabby looking wizard. Her monocle gleamed beneath the harsh white light of the room as her red hair was pulled back up on top of her head in a bun. "Despite what many in the magical world might believe, my Department is more than just a training department for the Minister's bodyguards, and we have been investigating the case of Sirius Black since his escape. While we cannot speak openly about the ongoing investigation, we do have some questions for you."

"Remus," Mad-Eye started up as his magical whirling eye fixed on the werewolf's face even as his normal eye glanced at a sheet of paper in front of him. "You and Black were close during the last war, along with James Potter and Pettigrew," he said passing over the names quickly. He and Remus had served in Dumbledore's Order of the Phoenix together in the last war and the last thing he wanted was to cause the man pain by dragging up old memories. "Where do you think Black would have gone when he escaped?"

Remus' amber eyes stare at the far wall for a second in thought. "I would have said he would go straight to check on Harry once," he said sadly. "Now, I don't know where he would go. If he was the Secret Keeper he would probably be looking for a relative who was also a Death Eater. Harry's idea in the Prophet though puts that in doubt. His version sounds like something James and Sirius would have come up with if I'm honest. I can honestly say, I have no idea where he would have gone. Sirius and I haven't spoken in twelve years, I couldn't tell you what state of mind he would be in."

"Understandable," Amelia said as she watched an enchanted quill write down his answers. "Mr. Lupin, would you have known of any reason why the Potters might have changed Secret Keeper without telling you?"

The shabbily dressed wizard gave a sigh at that. "I suppose by now you've heard of the Order of the Phoenix," he asked. Receiving an affirmative answer from the Head of the DMLE he continued. "I was asked to go to the werewolves and see if I couldn't change some of their minds from joining Voldemort's cause," he said, ignoring the winces coming from Amelia and Tonks at the name. "He was promising them better rights and freedom from the bigotry of the magical world. I was spending a lot of time with the various packs around Britain and they might have thought I was questioning which side I was on. There was also the fact there was a spy in the Order, feeding information to the Death Eaters. Nobody really trusted anybody at the time."

"Hmph, I remember that," Moody muttered with a sneer on his face. "We're sorry about this Remus, we've known almost all of this since the beginning," he admitted before he pulled out a tanned newspaper and put it on the table. "With the formalities over we can get to work. This is a copy of the paper that Fudge gave Black in prison. Do you see anything on it that would give Black the energy and need to bust out of Azkaban?"

Confused, Remus pulled the paper to him and opened it up. He could remember this one well thanks to the article about the Weasleys winning the Daily Prophet's monthly draw. He had been happy for the family, especially after learning they were friends of Harry's. Something caught his eye though that hadn't before. He never usually bothered with the pictures especially those of a family the likes he could never have, but he had been asked to look and now saw it. "That rat," he nearly whispered as he spotted the creature climbing on the youngest male's shoulder. "It can't be," he said in horror.

"What," Amelia asked standing and looking at the picture that had Remus' full attention. She barely noticed as Moody and Tonks moved to look at it as well.

"That," Remus said pointing at the rat on Ron Weasley's shoulder, "is not a rat. When I was at school my friends found out what I was and decided to help me out. They became animagi to keep themselves safe during the full moons," he admitted as he stared at the picture. "James was a Stag, Black a giant black dog, and Peter... was a rat." He glanced toward Moody who he noticed was looking at the picture with his magical eye. "Alastor, how many toes does that rat have?"

The giant blue magical eye danced over the picture for a second at the question before the auror had a look of rage upon his face. "Nineteen," he growled looking back and forth between Amelia and Remus before he turned to his apprentice. "You went to school with some of the Weasleys didn't you? Did any of them have a rat?"

"Oh! Um," Tonks grew quiet as she though about her years at Hogwarts. "Well, Charlie didn't, but his younger brother Percy did," she said after a long moment. Glancing back at the paper she pointed to the picture of the Weasleys and more importantly the rat. "That's the one he had, I think. I never really got to see it all that often, I was older and in a different house. If Charlie and I hadn't dated for a few months I probably couldn't have told you that much."

"Its a good lead though as crazy as it sounds," Moody said with a glance toward Amelia. "All of this should have come out in a trial or at least a questioning under veritaserum," he said carefully. "I'm sorry Amelia but..."

The older woman waved her hand as a hard look came over her face. "It's alright Alastor, I'll get by it. Thank you Mr. Lupin," she said turning her attention to the confused man in the room. "As you can see, the Weasleys are currently on vacation in Egypt and we'll need to wait for them to return before we can ascertain whether or not the rat is indeed an animagus. We don't want to show our hand before we can get them back inside the country."

"I understand, Madam Bones," Remus said with a sad smile as he nodded to her. "I'll wait to hear anything from you shall I? I need to get home and continue to make lesson plans for my upcoming position at Hogwarts."

"Good luck Remus," the grizzled auror said with a pat on the werewolf's shoulder. He watched as his fellow wizard walked out of the room before turning back to the two witches. His eyes focused on Amelia Bones who was chewing her lip in thought. "What are your orders?"

The stern looking older woman sighed tiredly as she look from the cadet to the grizzled war veteran. "Cadet Tonks, you will accompany auror Moody to the home of Department Head Bartemius Crouch. Look for anything suspicious," she ordered. "I'll have another team do another sweep of the Record's Hall to look for that blasted trial transcript." The red head didn't want to investigate Barty, the man had practically groomed her to take his place as the Head of DMLE when he thought he was going to become Minister. She couldn't bare the thought of him being corrupt but that was where the evidence was pointing and he had trained her to follow it. "Report back to me when you find anything useful," she snapped.

The tanned parchment shook in the bony hands of the blonde-haired woman of the house. Her pale blue eyes scanned the letter that had been slipped through her mail slot that morning again as they had several times before. The swooping green letters hadn't magically changed though, despite her wishes but also relief. She didn't even notice the sting of tears that burned at her eyes at the news that the last remnant of her family would be cutting ties with her.

Standing slowly from her spot at the kitchen table, she was glad that her husband was at work while her son was out playing. She didn't think she could handle seeing either of them at the moment. Making her way stiffly to the bathroom, she looked at the reflection of in the mirror and for the first time wondered, just who was the woman staring back. The blonde woman with the dull blue eyes, pinched face and long neck stared back at her with red rimmed watery eyes.

She had been slowly losing her family since she was ten and her sister had met that horrible boy from down the road. Her parents had praised her sister for her gifts, so outlandish and bizarre. What good had those freakish powers done in the end? Her sister had followed their parents to the afterlife rather quickly and her nephew had been unceremoniously dumped on her front porch like a crate of milk.

Again her eyes fell on the ancient parchment, looking at the loopy handwriting she had seen only twice before.

Dear Petunia Dursley,

I have no doubt that already your nephew has sent you the happy news that currently fills our world. I must say, I was shocked at first to learn of young Harry's betrothal but he seems to be taking it in stride. He is a wonderful young man who tries to keep his nose to the grindstone even though other things may rise up to better hold his attention. I admit that a great deal of those things were caused by my own short sightedness and lack of action, but the boy always rises to the occasion.

However, I do not write you tell of the boy's past but his future. With Harry's upcoming nuptials his need to return to your homestead is now obsolete as he will be moving in with his wives into their home. I don't write because I think it will matter much to you and your family, not with the way that Harry keeps begging to stay here during the summer, or his comments about what you think about his welfare, but out of politeness. While I would like for Harry to stay at your home for at least two weeks next summer, I will not be in a position to force him back and I expect him to take to this new freedom without a glance back. As such, I do not believe your presence will be necessary at King's Cross at the start of next summer, probably to both of your relief.

Hoping all is well,

Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore

The former Evans woman looked up at the mirror once more and easily wiped away the stinging salty fluid from her eyes. In her attempts to show just how loved her precious Diddykin's was and how much she would love him despite the Boy's abnormal powers she had driven off her sister's son. Her sister's eyes would never look at her again, not that they had that often in the Boy had been dropped off. It had been Vernon who had taught to the Boy not to look his betters in the eye, and she missed those eyes.

Those eyes didn't deserve the pain of looking out from the face of James Potter. If only the Boy had been a girl, a little red-headed girl with her mother's eyes, maybe things would have been better for them all. Now her Nephew was cutting ties with her, not because some Freak was hunting them, but because she had driven him away. "Good riddance," she muttered as she crumpled the parchment and tossed it in the toilet before flushing it away. With a sniff of indifference she had long ago practiced to the point of perfection she cleaned herself up and walked out of the bathroom.

"The Boy will finally be out of our hair," she said to herself, wishing she could feel the same indifference that her face showed the world.

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