(for Jenniebennie, who wanted another fic with Loki preggers~)

Loki had never realized just how often Thor watched him. Now he could feel the eyes that glanced at him constantly, almost hyper aware of it really. Their touches were no longer causal anymore; any time they so much as brushed each other, it felt like Thor was undressing him all over again. Mentally he cursed, angered that he had become so smitten with his brother. He didn't want to be, always the type to prize his independence, but something like a chain had been wrapped around his waist and he didn't know how to release it.

It was a chain made up of stolen moments, deep kisses and tender affection, passionate love-making in the dark. Their eyes never failed to make contact and they were being so terribly obvious that Loki knew if it weren't for the fact that the Warrior's Three and Sif were helping to allay suspicion, the entirety of Asgard would know.

Not that he was pleased about that aspect at all. He hated that Thor's friends were a part of this. When Thor had first admitted that they knew, that he had spoken of his feelings and they had supported him in his quest to conquer Loki's heart, he'd been almost incensed. He tolerated their presence most days, his resentment of them over the years of their 'teasing' belittlement not having abated, so finding out that they had known all along about this while he hadn't had not been a pleasant surprise.

What had been pleasant was the first time Fandral had make a smart comment about his skills, Thor had turned on his heel and defended him. It was the first time that he had ever seen his brother like that, his protectiveness reaching new heights. Loki hardly minded; in fact, he'd relished the stunned looks on the four faces.

"What is this, Loki?" Thor whispered huskily that night as he drew his lover to his own room. In the month of their relationship, every night he'd spent in his brother's room; tonight it would be his, a place that Thor had rarely been to.

"I think you deserve a little something," he murmured back, pushing Thor onto the bed and straddling him.

"For…?"

Thor didn't realize what he'd done, that he'd made Loki happy, and he wasn't really looking to enlighten him. "Do I need a reason?" he purred and proceeded to make Thor orgasm three times that night.

Things were…almost ideal for Loki. He was happy, really happy, for the first time in what felt like an eternity. Whatever resentment he'd held for the throne had faded away imperceptibly, little by little each day, and he was content to ignore the wonder in the back of his mind that asked him what his new role would be now that Thor had been officially acknowledged and was set to ascend to his role as King within a few months.

"I have not seen you smile so much in years, Loki," his mother commented as he sat with her in the garden, just enjoying watching her weave her magic. "Has something good happened to you?"

That secret smile widened a little and he shrugged helplessly. As if he could explain to her that the reason he was happy was because he was in love, and didn't that sound horrendously foolish. He had always rolled his eyes at such sappy tales, declaring to himself that he would never be like that. Frigga had always just looked at him when he'd say that and calmly state 'we will see'.

"Nothing particularly," he lied.

"Is it Thor? You both have seemed to have grown closer now than you have been for a long time."

Damn her perceptiveness! His heart had almost stopped at those three words, that question almost making him pale. He wiped the smile from his face, but nothing would erase the memory that it had been there once. "Thor has nothing to do with it."

"Then it is some other person that has caused you to act as if you have just discovered love?"

Her teasing smile made him roll his eyes, but he couldn't make a sarcastic comment back; she was his mother and one of his greatest weaknesses. "No. I am not in love, mother."

They had left the garden an hour later, but Loki did not feel as if he had convinced her.

Life had, all around, become almost everything he could have desired and yet not known he'd wanted, until third month of his relationship with Thor. The illness had started slowly, just a bit of nausea here or there that he was determined to ignore. He didn't feel feverish, unless one counted just how hot Thor made him at night. He attributed it to their passion that he was feeling more sensitive than usual.

His lover nipped at his chest, wrapping his tongue and lips around his nipple, and Loki let out a low, tortured scream. Like bits of lightning running along his nerve endings, the sensations were overwhelming and the words he found coming out of his mouth embarrassing. "Thor, Thor! Please, now!" he begged, actually begged.

"You seem more responsive than before, Loki," Thor whispered, but by the look in his eyes and voice, he was absolutely delighted about it. Without waiting another moment, he'd lifted the slimmer man's legs and thrust in.

Thor was such a heavy sleeper and Loki wore him out so ardently that his lover never noticed when he'd hurried out of the bed and into his adjoining bath, empty his stomach of whatever he had eaten the night before. Shaking after the eighth morning he'd had to go through his, he braced his hands against the edge of the sink and leaned over a bit, just breathing. Why? What he had dismissed as a stomach bug seemed to be lasting longer than he had originally thought and a niggle of worry settled in the back of his mind: what if it was a serious illness? He didn't want to go the healers unless it was absolutely necessary, but…

Shaking his head, he wiped his mouth, gurgled a bit, and slipped back into Thor's bedroom, hoping that his lover would still be asleep as he usually was. He frowned at seeing just how light out it was and instead of crawling back to bed, he grabbed a fresh pair of trousers from a spot hidden in Thor's closet. He had begun to keep quite a few clothes in here so he didn't have to dash back to his own room.

"How many times has that been happening?"

Loki turned, seeing Thor bracing himself up on his elbow in the bed. "What?"

"Rushing from the bed to vomit."

Oh. So he hadn't been as subtle this morning as the last ones, but then this time had rather crept up on him. He'd been asleep so deeply that he hadn't been aware of the warning signs. If he hadn't moved then, he would have made a mess of Thor's bed and he would never live it down. Deciding to be honest, he shrugged, "It is the eighth day. It's merely a stomach illness, it will pass."

"After eight days though?"

"Stop your worrying, Thor. I'm fine."

"Loki, I want you to speak to the healers. If you haven't by midday, I'll ask mother to look at you."

He glared. What were they, children? "Fine," he lied, knowing he wouldn't do it.

It seemed to appease Thor, though, because the man slid out from the bed and eased up behind him, letting his hands run over his front. His voice dropped to that seductive purr that never failed to work, murmuring, "I love you, Loki." Fingers were loosening the pants he'd just tightened and let it drop to his knees.

Loki had to brace himself against the dresser in front of him as his legs went a bit weak. "Thor, it's morning and you've had me four times the night before."

"It is a new day, brother," Thor laughed in his ear and gently slid his fingers inside him. "You're still a bit loose."

"I wonder why that is," he muttered, but blushed a bit.

Thor made short work of preparing him and he eased their hips together, letting out a heavy, pleased sigh as if he was home and belonged inside Loki. He bit his lip, moaning at the sensations as his brother loved him oh so gently. It made him forget he had places to be and things to do, wanting to spend nothing more than bent over an object for the man he loved, the one that would do anything he asked.

Despite the gentleness, Loki felt quite sore afterwards and he settled in the garden under the shade of a tree that afternoon. The breeze was lovely, the day overcast enough that the sun didn't bother him too much. He had brought a book with him, but it was so pleasant that he just wanted to close his eyes and sleep. He couldn't, but it wouldn't hurt just to take in the day…

Loki jerked awake at a gentle hand in his hair. When had he fallen asleep? It couldn't have been more than an hour… His mother's eyes were looking at him worriedly as she knelt next to him and he glared over her shoulder at Thor, who didn't seem the least repentant. Instead, he crossed his arms as if to say 'I told you I would'.

"Thor said you're feeling unwell, Loki."

"It's nothing, truly. Thor's overreacted."

"I have not," his brother groused, dropping down on his other side. "I have never known you to be ill enough to vomit for eight days in a row every morning."

Loki hissed, but it was too late. Frigga didn't even ask the question why Thor would know that he had thrown up every morning, how he would even know in general; instead she just glanced between them, seeing something that Loki tried to hide, and gasped. "Oh, Loki! What have you done?"

Feeling ashamed, Loki sat up. Of course it was his fault—

"No, mother. It's my fault," Thor abruptly said, wrapping an arm around Loki's waist and almost dragging him into his lap. "I…seduced him first. Everything he has done has been because I asked." There was a single moment before Thor plowed on with the most blatant lie of all. "Loki has never been willing, never reciprocated."

"Don't you lie to me, Thor," Frigga said, her tone stern despite her calm demeanor. "I did not raise either of you to lie to me." Her eyes softened in concern and worry. "Please, the truth."

"The truth is that we are physically and emotionally intimate," Loki stated as matter-of-factly as he could and not let his fear overwhelm him about how he had disappointed her.

"For how long?" she asked, a sense of urgency coming to her voice.

Why would that matter? "Since the night of Thor's coronation, why?"

"And did you use any protection? Loki…did your brother embrace you or did you embrace him?"

His eyebrows drew down in confusion. Why should any of this matter? "Why are you asking?"

"Loki, answer." When he didn't, still trying to work out her concern and getting a pit of fear in his stomach, she turned to Thor. "Thor, answer me."

"I have embraced Loki every time," his obedient brother answered.

"Protection?"

"None."

She ran her hands through her hair and if anything, her expression grew more worried still. Loki narrowed his eyes. "Why, mother? Why should protection matter when we are both men? I am clean, and so is Thor." He hadn't even had to ask whether his brother was or not; he was very aware of what had gone on around him.

"Please, stay here. I must get your father." She stood up and he felt something cold and fearful settle in his stomach.

"No, please don't tell him!"

The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them and Thor and Frigga stared at his panicked cry. "Loki?"

At his mother's questioning glance, he cursed himself but couldn't bear to lie to her. "Please don't tell him. He'll be angry with us and I don't… Please understand. I…can't help it. I…love Thor, mother. I could not bear for him to separate us."

"Loki, dear Loki…I think that's no longer possible."

She turned and quickly hurried away and Thor muttered, still keeping his arm wrapped around him, "What did she mean by that?"

"I don't know…but it isn't going to be normal, whatever she meant."

"A spell of some kind?"

"I don't know. I have felt no enchantments being cast either on me or you."

Before he could speculate further, Frigga had returned, trailed closely by Odin. She dropped to her knees, but Loki kept his eyes fixed on the older man, waiting for any signs of disgust or anger. "What is it?" he demanded harshly, seeing the same knowledge of whatever it was in his mother's eyes in his. "What do you know that we don't?"

Her hands touched his and Thor moved closer to his back, this time actually pulling Loki into his lap almost in some sort of protection, even from the two that had raised them. "Loki," she whispered, running her thumbs over his knuckles, "your illness is not illness. You're with child. Thor's child."

He laughed. He couldn't help it, he burst out laughing. "What madness is this, mother? I was always the trickster, not you." Seeing her face made his smile vanish and that fear in his gut expanded. "No. It can't be."

"Loki is a man, mother, of that I can guarantee. He cannot bear children…unless he was cursed by a spell?"

She shook her head at Thor's suggestion. "I didn't think we would need to have this conversation." She looked up at Odin, who finally kneeled down next to his sons and wife. "Loki, I did not bear you myself."

His heart stopped. "…What?"

"You are my son, you always will be, but I did not carry you as I did Thor. Your father brought you home; you'd been abandoned by those that did birth you."

So…he wasn't Thor's brother? Frigga and Odin weren't his father and mother? This place wasn't his home? "What…am…I?" he whispered, feeling the warm blanket of shock shudder over his mind. "What am I, that I can bear a child of another man?!"

"You are Jotun," Odin said, reaching for his hand. He watched in horror his pale peach skin began to recede and he saw a deep blue in color. Loki yanked his hands back, the blue receding quickly, but now both Thor's arms were around him. They were keeping him still, there, kept him from running in his panic, but also possessive and protective.

"What have you done?!"

"Nothing," Odin told the outraged voice of his brother. "During the last war with the Jotun, we pushed them back to Jotunheim. I forced Laufey to concede the battlefield and found that he had abandoned a babe near a temple because he was small, seemingly weak. I brought you home, breathed a spell on you to appear as an Asgardian."

"So you took pity on a Jotun that should have died because he was nothing more than a weakling?!"

"No, never pity, Loki. You were a beautiful baby and you melted my heart. I would not let you die and so I brought you home, where I have loved you just as I have loved Thor. It is merely a shame you had to find out this way."

"Find out this way?! Were you ever planning on telling me if this hadn't happened?! Wouldn't do to have Thor sullied by a Jotun!"

"Loki!" Frigga snapped and he winced at her admonishing, strict tone.

"What shall it be now then? Shall I be forced to leave? Give up the child? Or am I to be lose it before it's born? Then Thor and I shall be separated?"

"Loki…" He looked over at his mother, who appeared…angry with him. "I don't know why you think such poisonous thoughts. Even if we wanted to, there would be no separating you or Thor. When Jotun choose their mates, it is for life. The deeper the bond goes, the harder it is to separate them. You two have always been close since you were children. Emotionally you had already chosen Thor very long ago; when Thor came to you on his coronation, embracing you, he accepted and the bond was formed. This is not new, Loki. You could never bear to be apart as children after only five years; how could we do that now once the bond has been completed?"

When she tried to touch his hair, Loki shrunk back into his mate's arms who let out a soft growl of warning. So that was why Thor had become even more overprotective of late; their bond had only exponentially increased. Bonds were not to be taken lightly as they often intensified baser feelings, instincts, and desires; they were also highly permanent…and Loki and Thor had gone into it without even knowing.

"You will never, ever be banished or sent away," Frigga told him, not seeming upset that he drew away from her, but it was hard to tell for sure. "Nor would we ever, ever, ever force you to lose your baby. If you wish to give the child up for adoption, or even choose not to go through with the pregnancy, that will be you and Thor's choice."

"My whole life is a lie," he whispered.

"Were the emotions we felt a lie too then?" Odin asked, his voice having a hint of reproach to it. "How you came to be in this household was not what you thought, but that does not mean the life you created here is false. It does not mean that the love we hold for you is untrue or fabricated. A life is not dictated by one's birth, Loki."

He felt a rebellious feeling well in his throat and he turned away from his parents. He couldn't bear to look at them right then, knowing that not only had they kept this from him, but that it was a secret they never would have revealed if it hadn't been for the change in circumstances with Thor. He would have gone to his grave not knowing anything. Thunder rumbled ominously and a few drops of rain began to fall from a sky that had once been almost cloudless.

Odin nudged his wife, pulling her to her feet. "Do not stay out too long."

At least the man had the decency to leave. When he was alone with his brother, the rain starting out as a light shower, he muttered, "Release me, Thor. You hold an enemy of Asgard."

"You are Jotun, but that does not mean you are an enemy of Asgard…or of me." Thor shifted and Loki found himself on his back on the ground, staring up at Thor's face. He knew why his brother did it; he wouldn't have looked at him any other way.

"I have forced you into a bond long ago apparently."

"You forced nothing, Loki. It was started long ago, but I chose to accept it."

"Unknowingly."

"You didn't know either, so how can you take the blame on yourself?"

He felt his eyes close, feeling his world crashing down around him. "Thor, did you even listen to them?! I'm Jotun and now I've done something that no Jotun has ever done: carry the seed of an Asgardian. Do you have any idea what this will do? What of your friends, how will they react, knowing how wrong I am?"

"You are not wrong to me and I shall not allow any to say a word against you! I am king of Asgard now—"

"Not entirely. Father still advises—"

"Loki!" Thor looked at him softly, in such love it broke his heart. "If you feel the urge to weep, do so."

"I will not cry!"

"I'm merely saying that it's all right if you want."

Loki refused, didn't want to, but tears slid from his eyes regardless. He was horrified at his behavior; he hadn't cried since he was a child. He covered his face, but Thor only pulled his hands away and kissed his eyelids gently. "We will get through this together, Loki. I promise. This does not mean everything has to change."

"Yes, it does, Thor, and you know it."

Thor at least relented on that. "It does not have to be a bad change then."

"What can possibly be good about this?!" he demanded as the rain fell down harder, but so gradually he failed to notice.

His brother's smile was brilliant. "It allows me to ask for your hand officially. I would wed you, Loki Odinson." Lips kissed his knuckles, but there was a playful look in those blue eyes.

Couldn't he see how serious this was?! "Wed me?! Are you ready for that, much less being a father?!"

"If you are with me, I will always be ready for anything…and I very much enjoyed the acts we did to create that life."

It was so stupid, so absurd, so pathetic to talk about in the face of such serious issues that it caused Loki to laugh incredulously. To actually laugh despite it all… Thor was beaming at him and gathered him up in his arms in a tight hug. Loki pressed his forehead to Thor's shoulder, fingers digging into his back, as he merely reveled in the warmth of his brother's body and the rain from above.

Word spread fast after that, as if the secret had been waiting just to be said once. He felt the eyes of Asgard on him, the hissing whispers that followed him about his heritage and how he'd bared himself so intimately for his brother. Shame clung to his heels as he realized that what estimation he'd had in many people's eyes had disappeared and he had heard more than once sly comment about spreading his legs.

Loki bore it all in silence, though. He would not let his brother know. He would not tell him of his nightmares. The only blessing he had was that once it was revealed, Thor had, without even asking, moved Loki entirely to his room. It had been remodeled over the past few months to be worthy of a king's room, and for Loki, it was his only sanctuary. He slipped into bed every night and if he lost himself in Thor's arms with more vigor than before, it was because he needed to have some reminder of why he was suffering so.

He stepped into the great hall for Thor's first full day of court. Odin and Frigga were nearby, sitting lower than the new king in comfortable chairs. Loki assumed it for moral support, or for Odin to keep an eye on what Thor might be doing because while he may have been crowned, his brother knew very little in the way to rule a kingdom. Mjolnir had its own seat on a small table next to the throne, a place of honor, and Loki, despite his resentment that still bubbled after three weeks of hearing the truth, wanted to slink over to them anyway in silence, hiding behind their presence as he used to when he was a child.

That wasn't to be, because Thor's eyes met his and he gestured. It caused all heads to swivel toward him and he inwardly blanched. In the silence that followed, his footsteps were horrendously loud, but he made his way up to the throne. His mother had often been there with his father on court days, sitting nearby in a chair, but there was none placed there now. When he moved to kneel before his king and swear fealty, not sure what else he should do, Thor grabbed his hand.

Lips caressed his knuckles and he gently tugged him forward, a little at a time, before he found himself sitting, almost perched, on the edge of the half circle wings around the actual seat itself. Thor was smiling up at him in that delighted, yet confident way, and Loki really hated him for it. How did he not know just how difficult this was for him? All eyes were on him, the Jotun that dared, dared spread his legs for their prince and conceive a child. The pathetic prince of Asgard that was good for nothing at all, if not worse.

He could feel Sif and the Warriors Three taking their places as guards on the lower stairs to the throne. "Thor," he whispered in strain, managing to keep his voice low enough only his mate would hear."

His lover stood, but a touch on his knee kept Loki from standing as well. He leaned in, lightly caressing his cheek against Loki's. There was a puff of air at his ear and he tried not to shiver when Thor spoke. "Worry not, Loki. I will always protect you."

Protect him? Concern began to grow in Loki. Their bond was already deep and the mates that Jotun's chose were not truly intellectual, but on a base instinctive level. Knowing that he was with child, Thor's child, would only make the already almost-explosive protective feelings worse. Any perceived slight or discomfort in his mate would only cause his lover to lash out. It wasn't Thor's fault; it was the nature of the bond. "Thor…" he muttered warningly, "of what do you think I need protection?"

The new king straightened and smiled at the crowded room of his subjects and then with a move too fast to see, he'd grabbed Mjolnir and thrown it forward, the metal slamming violently into the floor at the base of the steps. The smile was gone and instead was replaced with something altogether different. The frown was severe, his eyes angered.

"I am, and will always be, the same man that you cheered and praised for years. I am still the warrior that foolishly challenged the great lord Calder to a drinking contest and failed." There was a smattering of chuckles at that. "Do I appear any different from the man that thought he was so charismatic that he tried to seduce a sorceress in his youth and was summarily cursed for a week with a female voice? I am still the man that welcomes any to come speak to me of troubles or merely to have a drink for fun."

The congenial voice disappeared and Loki stared as he listened. He had never once heard Thor sound so angry, so…enraged, as he did then. "But make no mistake: there is more to the man you applauded. If I hear one more word about Loki, I shall let Mjolnir speak for me instead! Loki is my mate and will be awarded the same respect you have always shown me. He may be Jotun, but that does not mean he is an enemy or unworthy of your respect! He is still Loki Odinson, Prince of Asgard, and soon to be my husband!"

Thor turned to Loki and reached out, kissing the back of his hand again. He didn't bother to lower his voice as now the smile was back and the severe tone had disappeared, as he asked, "Assuming you would consent to wed me."

"…How did you know?" he asked quietly.

"Know?"

"About what they were saying."

"I knew you were upset, but I didn't know why." His gaze flickered to his friends that watched from the steps. "No one would say anything while I was around; I was not there to hear it. They did."

He almost glared, feeling resentful. "I—"

"It was something I needed to know, Loki," Thor told him seriously. "You have always held your emotions in, refused to speak of them, and it has caused you, and I, great grief in the past. I refuse to let that happen again. I will never let you feel shame or anguish, and if I must rely on my friends to tell me of what you will not, then I'll do it."

He really was entirely unrepentant about it. There was not a hint of regret in his eyes, or awkwardness about what he had done. He didn't seem to care that he might anger Loki for doing so, and perhaps it was that that kept his resentment at bay. Thor would do it again in a heartbeat, because it was for Loki's benefit. It was something that, honestly, he could understand and appreciate, because he would do the same for Thor.

"Please, Loki."

"What?"

"I did ask you for your hand. Have you not left me in uncertain agony long enough?" Oh. That. Loki forgotten the question, indeed had assumed it was merely playing for the crowd. "Let me be the father I wish to be for our child, and the husband I crave for you."

Knowing that this was a conversation that everyone was listening to, he glanced at Odin and Frigga. There was no condemnation on their faces; in fact, he couldn't read them at all. Would they be disappointed in him? His eyes returned to Thor, who he could see was growing a bit worried; his confidence that Loki would say yes seemed to be ebbing away much like their first night when he was worried that Loki didn't share his feelings.

He chewed his lip, not really wanting to torment Thor, but trying to imagine what the future would bring if he said yes. It could cause a peace with Jotunheim…or it could cause a war, not just because of the marriage but because he was with child. If he remained merely a consort, while he would never gain the status and respect of husband to the king, there were more allowances for any behavior he might choose to do. It would also, though, make his child's claim on the throne less tenuous.

Thor dropped to one knee, startling Loki out of his thoughts and he felt those lips nudging the finger that his lover seemed aching to put a ring on. "Please, Loki." His voice was raw now, pleading. There was a faint rush of power in his veins, the same he'd felt as that first night after his orgasm, when he realized that despite being embraced, Thor had been beholden to him. He could only find pleasure where he wanted it if Loki allowed it.

His eyes widened as Thor showed him the ring, the one that Frigga had always cherished because it had belonged to her family line for so long no one remembered when it first came into being. It was the best way he could see her blessing, by giving it to Thor.

"Yes," he said at last. They would weather the storms and uncertainties of their future. There had never been a known marriage of two males in Asgardian history, or of a marriage between a Jotun and Asgardian. It could be the biggest mistake of his life.

But seeing Thor's brilliant smile and delight, he couldn't bring himself to regret a thing.