BOY'S ONLY CLUBHOUSE
It was never meant to be an official meeting , Wade thought, ... or a club... but that is what it became. After Ronald asked him tentatively... it was just the two of them at first... Then their unlikely ally in their endeavor got added... How that happened he still didn't know... but the three of them met regularly... and risked their lives with each meeting... Wade knew it was likely that they would be caught the more they met... but each time he promised himself he would quit... He would no longer attend the meetings or do any prepping, supplying, or hosting for the others... but he still hadn't quit yet... and as each secretive meeting was held and deemed a success... it seemed less and less likely he would. And so under the cover of darkness... The boys club met tonight.
"Stop hogging the couch RON!" Wade accused as he pushed the other boy to the side to carve himself some space.
"Hey I have a right to just as much space as any other... bigger more muscley guy!" He retorted defensively.
"That's not a correct usage of the word muscle Ron... You can't just go turning nouns into adjectives all willy nilly!" Wade pointed out as they waited for their third member. Then Ron stopped as he was about to repond...and sniffed the air.
"DAMN IT DRAKKEN! You burned the popcorn AGAIN!" He waived his arms wildly about to accentuate what a huge crime his fellow had committed... "I knew I never should have invited you!"
"It's only burnt a LITTLE!" Drakken defended as he returned with a bowl of the slightly charred kernels. The boy, teenager, and man all sat down as one and starred at the screen as the remote was pressed...
"HAHA buffoon! You lost your pants again!" Drakken cackled in delight as the TV showed Ron's Heart boxers...
"Hey that airduct had a nail sticking out that my pants got caught in! Not my fault!" He defended.
"Shut up it's getting to the good part!" Wade hushed as all three stilled entranced... The footage showed a redheaded teenager and a green woman just out of teenagerdom herself rolling around and fighting each other... the video had obviously been carefully edited from multiple cameras and had been specifically digitally slowed when the opponents were wrestling on the ground... their faces hardly an inch apart. Silence reigned as the show went on.
Shego knew Drakken had been acting twitchy of late... Always a few days right after a big fight he would disappear for a good 6 hours and considering how much time he spent INSIDE that was a big red flag... So she followed him to a house in the suburbs of Middleton... not Kimmie's... nothing special about it... and she had no idea who it belonged to, but being cautious was what had saved her hide more than once... well that and plasma fire powers... okay mostly it was the plasma fire powers... but still she decided against breaking in and just noted the address for further investigation.
Kim noted this was the third time she found she could not reach Wade... and Ron was also missing at this time as well... She would have thought it was no big... except something about this sitch was bugging her... So she decided to question Ron as the weakest and most breakable link. But she was in no huge rush to investigate.
Shego was about to tear her hair out! She had searched... and researched... and then REsearched... but NOTHING! All she could figure out was that the house didn't seem to exist... ANYWHERE on ANY official record... If she hadn't seen it with her own eyes and double checked the address she might have doubted her sanity. And now Dr. D was about to leave soon for another "meeting"... This puzzled her for another good 5 minutes until her eyes widened as she realized who must live there through process of elimination and deduction... She needed to double check... and it still made no sense to her...all the theory's of why Drakken and the Nerdlinger would hold regular meetings... okay let's face it she had absolutely NO theories... at all... so admitting defeat she sighed and knew she had to call in the reinforcements. She left silently as soon as Dr. D had driven away.
"What's the sitch?" Kim said seriously as she answered her phone.
"God do you ever take out that stick shoved up your butt and say Hello? Like a NORMAL person?!" Shego chuckled.
"Shego?! What are you doing calling here! Did you kidnap someone! Or steal something?! Or are you threatening to steal something cause I gotta tell you this is NOT the way you should go about this." Kim responded.
"Chill Princess... I just need your help with a little... problem I've got going... Have you noticed the Nerdlinger acting strangely at all?" Shego prodded.
"Well him and Ron have been going AWOL on the same evenings every so often. But what has that got to do with you?" Kim asked.
"The buffoon too?... This is worse than I thought... Drakken's in on whatever it is their doing...And it's always after I steal something or your guys catch me and Dr. D." Shego supplied.
"You're right about them doing whatever it is soon after we fight... but do what?!" Kim puzzled.
"Yeah after we... No! They wouldn't do that... would they?!" Shego gasped.
"Do what?!" Kim asked hoping the other woman could shed some light.
"They're plotting something." Shego responded... "I mean what ELSE could they be doing?!"
"Well obviously... but the question is still WHAT?" Kim sighed.
"Well I don't know about you Pumpkin... But Dr. D just left to go to a meeting right now at Nerdlingers... Waddya say we go ask them..." Kim could hear Shego grinning through the phone... and matched it with one of her own fierce grins.
"I thought you'd never ask. But I have no idea where Wade lives... no one does... How do you know!" Kim was shocked.
"I followed Dr. D there last week and although it took me this long to figure it out who lived there... I'm in the tree outside your window now... Nice Yummy Sushi Jammies Princess..." Shego sassed as Kim widened her eyes and looked at her window spotting the now visible and smirking thief waving at her smugly.
"Do you often hang outside my bedroom window Shego?" Kim lifted an eyebrow as she recovered from shock and embarrassment and tried to cover her pride. She grinned as Shego was held speechless for a few seconds longer than usual, showing her comment did hit it's mark.
"I got better things to do than watch you hang up Oh Boyz posters and hug your Pandaroo ... Bubblebutt." Shego zinged back having regained her surly groove... but Kim had questions... She had taken down her poster last month... and her Pandaroo was tucked safely under the covers where Shego couldn't possibly have seen it. She hung up the phone and opened her window
"Shego... We're going to have to talk about you stalking a minor later... We've got a party to crash." Kim called out as she leapt down in a beautiful flip and landed on the ground in a crouch... Shego followed suit and the two were off with Shego ahead of Kim by just a foot to lead the way.
"Okay we have some really nice footage with this one since it was in a nicely lit place with lots of cams that WASN'T a lair that has a self destruct button that someone always pushes." Wade ranted as he popped in the DVD.
"It's not my fault! it's the buffoon that always pushes the big red button clearly labeled Self Destruct!" Drakken accused.
"WHO PUTS A SELF DESTRUCT BUTTON IN THEIR LAIR MAN!" Ron exploded. He exhaled and inhaled a few times counting to ten and then grabbed the uncooked popcorn bag out of Drakken's hands. "Na uh... I... will be making the popcorn Mr. Self Destruct Mc Burnsallthefood!" Ron huffed as he put the bag in the microwave.
"That's not fair! We got the footage from my lair even though it was destroyed the last time didn't we! And I didn't burn the popcorn... two popcorn makings ago..." Drakken said pouting.
"Yeah because half the bag WASN'T COOKED!" Ron pointed out. The bickering only continued from there as the two decidedly unamused females watched and listened to the proceedings with interest from outside.
"I can't believe Wade and Ron would DO this... Whatever it is their doing with Drakken! It makes no sense!" Kim grumbled watched and listened to the things going on in the room via her Kimmunicator.
"I totally believe Drakken being stupid enough to hang around these mooks... nothing about him surprises me anymore." Shego drawled as she bent her head closer to Kims, watching the screen and sharing Kim's the headphones. Damn why did the Princess have to smell so goddamn GOOD! It was fucking torture being this close and not trying to kiss her... erhmm pulverize her! She meant to think pulverize her! She swears. As they watched the unlikely trio finally settle down to do what they had come to do... the realized they were in totally the wrong position to see anything... the bug Kim had planted facing the couch instead of the TV... They cursed... but them both fell silent as they heard their own voices blaring...
"Aww... is someone having a bad day Cupcake?" Shego's sarcastic drawl came out in their earbuds.
"Not as bad as you're going to have!" Kim's voice responded... then there was a serious of smacks, moans, groans, and grunts... The two young women looked at each other... and moved towards the house as one.
"HIYA BOYS! Why weren't we invited to you party!?" Shego theatrically announced as the dramatically entered.
"Ron! WADE! How COULD you!" Kim asked. "WITH HIM!" She pointed at a very wideeyed Drew who had frozen mid popcorn munch.
"We uh... We can explain!" Ron started.
"Yeah Buffoon... Explain to me how you guys are getting your rocks off perving on us! Maybe even selling it on the internet!" Shego pointed at them accusingly as she marched towards Drakken.
"We didn't! I mean... Only like a few!" Wade protested as Kim rounded on both him and Ron.
"You will STOP any and all of these meetings and give us all the copies of the footage that you have." Kim demanded from Wade and Ron as Shego marched a whining Drakken out by his ear.
"But I'm your BOSS!" He protested in a very unbecoming shrill whine.
"Yeah and I have a strict No Footage Policy in my contract! Read the FINE PRINT YA DUMBASS!" Shego railed as she nodded once more to Kim and the two went to their hovercraft.
"As for you two... TAPES! NOW!" Kim roared as the two teens scrambled to acquiesce.
The day after was the first official meeting of the GIRL'S ONLY CLUB. Though this club only had the two members.
"Let the fun begin!" Shego crowed as she pushed in the first dvd the boys made.
"I feel so naughty." Kim giggled as she stuffed her face with popcorn.
"Oh... Princess... If this is naughty for you... I need to teach you a few things." Shego grinned seductively. Kim blushed and refocused on the screen trying to ignore the positively sinful look Shego was giving her. They giggled as Kim flipped and landed elegantly out of the vent while Ron flopped face first on the ground. Then when the fight began in earnest both pairs of eyes shined bright as they bickered about who had the better moves, who was faster, who should have seen that punch coming but didn't, who was more photogenic, and everything else they could possibly bicker about... because they were having fun bickering. Needless to say they watched late into the night.
"Maybe we should have left them to continue... and just stolen copies from them without their knowing it... I mean... We're almost halfway through!" Kim noted.
"Aww... Pumpkin... We wouldn't be us if we had let them do this and get away with it... We had to shut them down." She sighed... also unhappy that they were running out of tapes to watch... Then a wicked smile came again to her face. "We could make our own tapes." She tried... as she ran her hand along Kim's arm delicately... teasingly... Kim's face showed a plethora of expressions that did not disappoint... shock... lust... embarrassment... outrage.
"SHEGO!" Kim's mouth still hung open as she slapped the straying hand away. As the villainess laughed heartily Kim shook her head "Stop teasing me!"
"Oh Princess... I thought you'd never ask." Shego's eyebrows waggled as she moved closer to Kim once again, this time in true jest... well mostly jest... like 40%IwannakissKim and 60%jest.
"Shego..." Kim said seriously as she sighed and held the other woman's antics off. "What is this?"
"What is what?" Shego asked puzzled.
"You... flirting with me... I'm confused." Kim decided for complete honesty... it usually worked... although she wasn't sure how effective it would be as getting straight answers out of Shego could be like pulling teeth. "You have obviously been watching me from my bedroom window more than just that one night... You call me Princess, and Pumpkin, and Cupcake, and other pet names... You flirt with me like just now... I mean... do you LIKE me? or are you just screwing with me!" Kim got more worked up as she ended her rant.
"um... which would you like?" Shego asked surprisingly subdued.
"What?" Kim frowned in confusion.
"Would you rather I just be messing with you... or... would you rather I like you." Shego asked seriously.
"You can't just! I ASKED YOU FIRST!" Kim empasized with dramatic gestures.
"Duh... I'm a villian! When have I EVER played fair." Shego chuckled.
"Urgh you are so frustrating I just want to..." Kim grabbed Shego by the collar of her unitard... and then paused as she stared into her face... and then while she was distracted by their unexpected closeness Shego kissed her. She was a thief after all. Kim was still stunned anew by the unexpected move but soon matched Shego as the two began to kiss in earnest... Both young women... when they got back to actually having clear coherent thoughts... chuckled at the irony of the tapes bringing them closer and that the boys would die when they heard they missed this very different kind of show. And would never be privy to it. It was a Girl's Only Club after all, which had many, many future meetings.