*AN* G'day. Just a quick note here. This is set after Awakenings, assuming that everybody survived (i know that's not the way it really went, but I wanted to play with all the characters). Alistair is the king, the Warden Commander is a Dalish Elf, and Alistair slept with Morigan so that the Warden (Lyna) could survive killing the Arch Demon.

Also, a HUGE thank you to catsplosion for reading this and encouraging me to post it. This is my first posted fic and it wouldn't be here with out her encouragement. Check out her story - Run and Hide and Seek. It's AWESOME!

Ok, that's enough. Now on with the fic.

Looking back, it hadn't been such a bad life. Growing up Dalish meant freedom and a connection to nature that those poor fools stuck in the alienages just wouldn't understand. Lyna had spent her days hunting, and spending time with her friends, and never really had to work for a living, not in the sense that the shemlen and the elves in the alienage did. She could do as she pleased, within reason, and the honour of helping the clan was so satisfying.

But she had been too stupid to realise just how good life had been. When Tamlen had died she thought it was just another thing that had gone wrong for her, and she was sure she was the unluckiest elf alive. Oh losing Tamlen was horrific, and seeing what became of him was worse. They had thought they would be married one day, and they certainly spent all their time together, but somehow Lyna had managed to make it all about herself, ignoring the pain that the others had felt, and proving (without realising) just how selfish she really was.

And then Duncan had brought her into the Grey Wardens and, rather than feeling it was a new chance, she fought against it all the time. She wasn't part of this world, she didn't really know if she wanted to help the shem. After the slaughter and betrayal at Ostagar she really was tempted to give it all up and go back to her clan.

The horrors she saw, on top of the gut-wrenching agony of having to leave her home, almost dying, experiencing every nightmarish event that followed - well it all should have been too much. And it would have been, if not for him.

Alistair Therin, Grey Warden and, now, king of Ferelden. It was funny to think that the Blight had been a happier time, but in a way it was. When they had been travelling Ferelden, gathering an army and solving every single problem anybody presented them (really, she needed to learn to say no to people), they were together and it was wonderful. Death and chaos and destruction, and yet it was wonderful. Surely he would laugh at that.

Oh she missed his laugh. And his awkward comments and deflections as he tried to hide his embarrassment. She found herself now often being caught unawares by recollections of his witty one-liners and romantic gestures. She was meant to be the 'Hero of Ferelden', and yet her breath would catch if she ever caught sight of anybody with even the most passing resemblance to him. Maker, but she would even get wistful when she saw a lamppost.

Yes she licked that lamppost! But not anymore.

When he had finally accepted that he was to be the king, for the good of Ferelden, he showed just how committed to justice and honour he was. Willing to put his personal feelings aside for the greater good. And that meant putting her aside as well.

"Ferelden isn't ready for a Dalish queen Lyna, I'm sorry. And the kingdom will need an heir." And he had seemed so sincere that she found herself agreeing to be friends with him all the same.

But as soon as she was able to leave she was glad to get out of Denerim. Travelling to Vigil's Keep in the North, and taking up a nice, quiet job as arlessa, rebuilding the Grey Wardens and waiting for her Calling, would be so much easier than having to face Alistair, and wait for the news that he had wed and, even worse, had a child.

Even being faced with the fact that darkspawn had somehow invaded the Keep and slaughtered almost all there was slightly less unpleasant that having to be Alistair's friend. But then he showed up, to welcome her to the Keep and she'd let herself have a glimmer of hope that perhaps he had changed his mind. They could work out a way around the problems they faced. They might even be able to have a child. There could be a king to follow Alistair; they just needed to find a way. They had defeated the archdemon and stopped the Blight. Surely conception couldn't be much harder than that?

But he didn't even stay for a meal.

And now she found herself having to rule a region that was torn apart by the corruption that Rendon Howe had wrought, as well as tending to every single person's problems (seriously Lyna, say no to people!), counter the complaints of the various villagers, and try to convince Nathaniel Howe not to kill her. Oh, and she had to work out a way to keep Anders in line. That in itself could be a full time job!

What was a few more darkspawn with the ability to speak? That wasn't all that big a deal was it?

And again, she found herself dreaming of the "good old days' during the Blight!