Title:

Still Here

Author:

The Prickly Pear

Genre:

English

Rating:

K

Summary:

In the end it was one moment out of the months they had spent working side by side in forced companionship which kept coming back to her.

Author's Note:

Alright, so I have no idea what this is or where it came from. I'm also not even sure what style it's written in because it's different than anything I've done before. Whether or not that's a good thing I'll leave up to you lovely readers. It was written in one go in an attempt to alleviate a bad case of writer's block and is based off the challenge to pick two characters from any fandom and write about the one thing one remembers most about the other. That's where this started. I have no idea where the hell it ended up...

Thoughts, comments and concerns are always welcome so please let me know what you think!

Disclaimer:

All characters you recognize are the property of Broadchurch's rightful owners. This fanfiction is written solely for my amusement, no money has been made whatsoever.

Happy Reading!

In the end it was one moment out of the months they had spent working side by side in forced companionship which kept coming back to her. Even after eleven months, two weeks and six days (not that she was counting,) a new house in a new town and four attempts at a new job Ellie Miller – no, Stevens – kept coming back to one sentence uttered to her in what she now recognized to be a mixture of desperation, helplessness and pain.

She hadn't paid it any mind at first, after all there'd been plenty else to occupy her thoughts. The day after Danny Latimer was finally buried her decision to leave Broadchurch had been emphatically confirmed by a nasty encounter with a group of local fathers (the same group who had attacked Jack, she mused, perhaps they wanted her to take a dive off a cliff too...) He had to be there, of course, her damned insufferable boss. She hadn't even noticed him until he was ordering the angry mob away with an undeniable authority which should not have been possible for someone who looked so ill to pull off. And really, now that she knew about his heart she couldn't help but wonder how the hell she'd missed that he was so sick for so long. Some detective she was (which, of course, was what the fathers were saying.)

He'd driven her back to her room at the Traders just as soon as the group dispersed and found her a suitable motel in the nearby town at Whitecastle before she'd even finished packing. He'd even gone so far as to follow them there in his own car some three hours later, and stayed with them until he was sure they were settled before returning to the town she would never see again (and she didn't want to either, that was most certainly not why she was crying.)

The next day (their first full day away from Broadchurch) was an exercise in loneliness. They stayed in the confines of their motel room all day, she and Tom barely speaking, despite her best efforts, and little Fred crying periodically for the Daddy he would never see again to pick him up and hold him. It was all Ellie could do to keep from joining him in tears. And then, just ask the clocks were striking seven and the sun was dipping below the horizon, the motel phone range. She picked it up with trepidation and the moment the rough Scottish accent met her ears nearly cursed him out and thanked him all that the same time.

And so it began that every evening come seven o'clock, Alec Hardy would call the motel, then the two bedroom basement suit, then finally the little house she managed to afford. At first he'd spoken only to her, kept her up to date on the happenings in Broadchurch as though he could sense her need to still feel connected, (even if he denied it to herself,) completely with his own cynical commentary on all of it. It was the only thing, in those first few months, which managed to make her laugh. She'd offered to let Tom speak to him as well, but her son was suspicious of the bad tempered copper who'd all but accused him of murder (even if Ellie now understood that he'd merely been trying to gauge Joe's reaction) and barely speaking to anyone anyway. This was why, one Thursday (about a month after they'd arrived in Whitecastle) when she'd been forced to work late and only got home at twenty after seven, she was so surprised to see the sitter she'd hired sitting calmly in a fold out chair just outside her motel room door, reading to little Fred in the fading sunlight.

Tom, the sitter had explained, had asked for some privacy after answering the phone some twenty minutes ago and as the room was so small she'd brought Fred outside in order to comply. Ellie listened in confusion before it occurred to her that only one person would be calling them at seven exactly. Alec. She had stepped carefully inside to be met with the sight of her eldest son curled up in front of the television with the motel's phone pressed up to his ear, drying tears on his cheeks and a smile turning up the corners of his mouth. His mother couldn't help but smile with him.

After that day it was not just Ellie who spoke to her former boss when he called. When she'd finished her conversation the phone would be passed off to Tom who, more often than not, would make small talk about football or some such thing for a few minutes before disconnecting the call. Some days, however, the boy run off (first to the bathroom of their motel room, then his bedroom in the suit and even once or twice to his larger bedroom in their new house) clutching the phone to his ear and return some time later looking somehow lighter than before. She'd asked Alec more than once what the two talked about on those days but the former Detective Inspector would never say, always claiming her son would tell her when he was ready. It was easier to talk to someone you really only knew over the phone, he would say, than someone you had to live with everyday, and as much as Ellie didn't like it she had to agree.

Slowly, things started to get better. By the time they moved into the new house Tom was playing football again, keeping busy with practice three times a week (Alec never called on those days,) Fred had started daycare and Ellie had a job she thought she may actually keep. On the weekends they kept busy, going places and going things as a family. Her job with the police back in Broadchurch had kept her away from home more than she liked and now she was determined to be the mother her boys needed (Alec never called on those days either.) On the two remaining days when he did call the conversation was different, it was Ellie who told him all about Whitecastle now, and Broadchurch was almost never mentioned. Soon, she began missing his calls even on those last two days. They were running late from something, Tom was out at a friend's, they'd gone out for chips... Alec never left a message.

It was three months since they'd last spoken when that one desperate phrase found its way into Ellie's head. Tom had wondered aloud how Alec was doing (the first time he'd mentioned him since he'd last called) and it floated to the surface without warning.

I can still solve this, otherwise why am I still here?

She'd noticed the desperation in the moment, it was hard to miss, but she'd been so frustrated, so on edge and desperate just to solve the damned case that she'd pushed any other observations aside. The fact that he'd basically told her that solving Danny Latimer's murder was his only reason for living had completely passed her by.

"Only, the kids at school were talkin' about him today..." Tom continued, watching her.

Ellie felt her heart skip a beat. No, no, they'd been so careful, no one was to know that what happened in Broadchurch had anything to do with them –

"Not like that, they weren't even talking to me," her son's voice cut off her thoughts as though he'd sensed them, "But, they mentioned that he was being sued. Something about a case called Sandbrook and lying about what happened to evidence..."

The former Detective Sergeant let out a breath. Of course... She'd read the story in the echo, Alec's side of the Sandbrook story, but there'd been so much else going on in her life right then (with Danny and Joe and getting the hell out of Broadchurch) that she hadn't given it another thought. It occurred to her suddenly that she hadn't given a lot pertaining to Alec a second thought and she closed her eyes.

"I just thought, I mean, he helped us..."

Opening her eyes again, Ellie gave her son a small smile. "I agree," she said gently, "I'll call him, shall I?" She pulled out her mobile as she spoke, bringing up her former boss's number and sending the call through.

Why am I still here?

Her boss's voice echoed through her head once more and she squared her shoulders in determination. She'd show him why.

There were a total of three rings before an angry Scottish voice barked, "What?"

"Normally people say hello, you know," Ellie fired back instinctively.

There was a beat of silence on the other end of the line before Alec spoke again. "Ellie?" he asked, his voice far less rough this time, "What happened? Is something wrong?"

The woman in question felt a surge of sadness pass through her at man's words. It seemed that the only time he expected to hear from her was when she needed something. "No, nothing. We're alright. Everything's alright," she assured him, moving on to the reason for her call before he could interrogate her to verify her statement, "We - that is to say, Tom, Fred and I - were wondering if you'd like to come by for dinner, that's all."

Again there was a pause. "I'm not your boss anymore," Alec said finally, some of the roughness finding its way back into his voice, "You don't have to invite me."

"I know you're not, and I know I don't have to," said Ellie with a sad smile, "But I'd hoped that you considered us friends and would come for that reason. We were thinking Friday..." More silence met her words and she frowned. "Just say yes already, Sir," she snapped, forgetting herself for a moment and wincing when she realized what she'd done. This time she didn't try to interrupt the pause that followed.

"Alright," came Alec's reply at last, "Fine. Friday."

Ellie just grinned. Alec Hardy wouldn't be going anywhere anytime soon.