I remember it hitting me for the first time at graduation, the first time I saw them and actually knew who they were. All of the MacKenzies who jumped up and screamed when their precious Cindy 'Mac' MacKenzie awkwardly walked across the stage to get her diploma. It wasn't just her parents and little brother, there was grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins.. all there just watch the thirty seconds it took to shake the hand of principal Clemmons before exiting the stage.

She looked so embarrassed that all of them were there. She didn't realize how lucky she was that she had a family who gave a damn.

My family on the other hand had sent flowers from Paris, they left the keys to her brand new car with the maid.

It's not like I didn't deserve a lot of the shit people talked about me, I was a bitch, still am if we're being honest but it was my way of coping. I made other people feel like shit so I could for one second pretend that my life was better than theirs. In reality I had four parents who weren't in my life, a little brother I'd never know, and a little sister who would do anything in her power not to turn out like me. I was okay with the last part, Lauren was better than that.

I wanted to cry when my name was called and beyond all of the 09er screams and cheers, my eyes involuntarily focused on them. They didn't jump up like they did with Mac, that would be weird considering they weren't supposed to even know me. But they smiled proudly, and clapped along with the rest of the crowd. I didn't expect to feel so happy about that, like at least I knew that they still thought about me.

Of course they didn't know that I knew, that I'd figured out the secret years before Veronica Mars had set up her little business in the halls of Neptune High. That I'd found the papers from the lawsuit when I was fifteen while searching for my passport.

Still, when I saw the looks on their faces that day, I made a decision that I was going to come clean about having known the truth. Try to get to know my biological parents, but it was Neptune and something was always lurking in the dark to ruin your plans.

This time it was Cassidy Casablancas. I was at the party that night, I remember the screams from the other guests when someone said that someone had jumped off the roof. I remember the look on Dicks face before he dropped to the ground and threw up because someone said it was Beav. The next day Carrie Bishop, the nosiest bitch in Neptune (aside from Veronica Mars of course), informed me, and most of the other 09ers that in her words, "that freak with the random colors in her hair that the Beav was dating was apparently found in a hotel room, completely naked and hysterical. I heard he threatened her with a gun before stealing her clothes". After hearing Macs involvement, I didn't have the heart to throw anymore chaos at the MacKenzie family.

It was that day that I gave up all hope of ever really getting to know my real parents, that I decided to leave them alone, let them be a family I only dreamed of.

It was six years later when I saw that same happy family, once again at a Neptune High School graduation.

Go Pirates!

This time it was the class of 2012, Ryan MacKenzie was the valedictorian. I sat in the back, out of sight; I didn't know that she knew about the switch so I didn't want to be seen. I cried when he read his speech, I could tell Mac was crying too. Dick Casablancas was at her side, his arm around her lovingly, something I never thought I'd seen. I'd heard through others that they had started dating at the end of college but I'd never seen them together. It made sense though, that the only two people Cassidy Casablancas loved (at least as much love as he was capable of) would end up together. I was personally more surprised that she had gotten him to wear something other than his ridiculously inappropriate tee shirts than the fact that they were together.

They seemed happy. I was grateful for that.

After they called Ryans name I stood up to leave, that's when she looked back at me. She looked confused at first, but by my panicked gaze I think she got it.

It wasn't some long drawn out moment that ended in us talking for hours, crying over time we couldn't get back or anything dramatic like that. She simply smiled sadly and nodded. She understood, and as much as she hated me at least a part of her knew that I cared about something other than myself. That was oddly comforting.

I wasn't surprised to look back and see her sitting in the back row, Dick at her side once again. Lauren was graduating, and as hard as it was to think about the fact that she wasn't technically my little sister, and that her real sister was there as well, I was strangely okay with it. Since our parents decided a last minute couples getaway cruise was more important than watching their youngest daughter graduate high school, it was nice to see other people rooting for her.

In all honesty, I don't know why I did what I did, but I looked back, caught their attention and waved them to take the seats next to me. It was clear by the fact that Dick was with her that she had told him about the switch, which kind of upset me. Not because he knew, but because she actually had someone in her life that she trusted enough to share it with. Something I didn't think I'd ever have.

To my surprise they actually sat next to me. We didn't talk, I simply smiled and nodded at their arrival. Tears fell from both of our faces when Laurens name was called, she smiled over at us, it was like she knew as well but never said anything. I was crying because of how happy and proud I was of my little sister, I had no doubt that Mac was crying for the same reasons I did the year before when Ryan walked across the stage. Because so much of our lives had passed and now it was too late to get the memories of what could have been back. We both had parts of us that would always be empty, voids that we could never fill because it was too late to get to know what our lives could have been had it never happened, or if we had figured it out sooner.

They left right after the ceremony, said polite goodbyes and they were gone.

I didn't think we'd ever be in the same room on purpose again; so I was pretty surprised when by the end of that same summer I got an invitation to their wedding. It was like she was giving me a free pass; a way to meet them without putting pressure on anyone or them even realizing that I knew.

The wedding was small, well, small considering it was an 09er wedding. It was simple, understated, and perfect for them. It was on the beach, and I realized that it must have been a compromise on her part since she never seemed like the California beach bum type like Dick. It made me realize how much better of a person she was than me because had it been my wedding I would have been sure to get whatever the hell I wanted.

Veronica Mars was the maid of honor, Logan Echolls the best man, it didn't surprise me one bit. A blonde I didn't know was one of the bridesmaids, she walked down with Ryan, later I found out her name was Parker something. Sam MacKenzie walked her down the aisle, I sat in the back and was surprised when they both glanced over me and smiled as they made their way towards Dick.

I hated myself for crying, because really, who cried watching their high school boyfriend marry the girl you were switched at birth with? Okay, I realize that most people would never experience that, but still, it felt strange to be there, surreal. The ceremony was short, but beautiful, her gown was strapless and simple, but she looked gorgeous. They looked so happy that I found myself believing for a moment that love was actually possible in my world again.

During the reception they came up to me, both smiling and I no longer thought I'd made a mistake by coming.

"The wedding was beautiful" I told them, probably the nicest thing I'd said to either of them in the years that I'd known them.

"We're glad you came" she reassured me, and it was that moment that regardless of my own pain I was finally okay with the switch. She got the right parents, and I was okay with that because though she had been through so much pain, she was still a good person. I don't know that I would have been even if I had the great family that she did.

"Thanks for inviting me." I smiled, Dick simply nodded and I noticed two sets of eyes staring at us with tears threatening to fall. Sam and Natalie MacKenzie, watching the daughter they had raised and the daughter that had been taken away from them only two days after I was born talking, smiling, and not trying to rip each other's hair out.

No one besides a handful of people at the wedding understood the significance of what happened next, but they walked over and without a word hugged both of us. I couldn't stop the tears that fell, neither could she. It was a moment I had dreamed about the better part of my life and it was better than everything I could have imagined. I knew that they loved me, that they still thought about me.

Everyone was staring but it didn't seem to matter, Logan had his arm around Veronica, who despite her distaste for me (something I deserved of course) was smiling.

I left shortly after, too emotional from everything that happened, but not before Natalie had slipped a piece of paper in my hand, their number and address and told me that they'd love for me to come to Sunday brunch.

It was then that some of those empty places inside of me started to feel less empty. We'd never know what could have been if the wrong babies hadn't been taken home from the hospital all those years before, but we could make new memories, we could get to know each other as who we were now. That was plenty for me, because for once I had a family who wanted me at their annoying get togethers, who would be there when something important happened in my life, who wouldn't sent flowers to make up for their absence.

Finally I had something worth living for, worth trying to be a better person for.

A/N: I know its completely OOC, but I read a story about Madison and well.. it gave me feels. It's not my best, but still, the idea of giving Madison a little heart is worth it. Review!