..

.

10

…

Anxiety

.

.

.

With Hyuuga Hinata, an intelligent conversation is an occurrence so frequent that it's already an inevitability in itself. Something that while admittedly he wouldn't always look forward to, he does expect and actually does not mind to happen from time to time. Hinata's white eyes always gleamed with suppressed ingenuity in these moments, as in her characteristic fidget, she animatedly spoke about subjects that could be obscure and charlatan if he wasn't so well-informed. Knowing about things people normally don't give an iffy about is one thing. Being proactively interested in it is another. In this lecture mode, Hinata usually struck him like a paleontologist talking authority with a movie fan about Jurassic Park. She is as dominant on this as she proves to be in bed and Sasuke thinks that exactly is what is between them.

With Kiba, she is the nice, accommodating longtime-friend who politely listens as the other runs his big mouth for the whole day. Asks questions from time to time because she thinks she has to but evades one from him because she believes it's necessary.

With Neji, she is the sulky but reassuring younger sister insistent on being a capable young woman already.

With Tsunade, she is passionate.

With Sakura, she is inquisitive, curious, almost demanding to prove that the 5000 ryo a month she sends the woman is worth.

With acquaintances, she is impressive. Ino trusting her immedieately. More than one male tenant turning their heads once more to get a good look to the pretty, young woman from Thirteen.

And with Naruto, she probably was someone she regrets being.

But with Sasuke and only with Sasuke, she can be intelligent, critical, honest, sexy, innoxcwent, self-righteous and the most ill-meaning person alive and he could not help the prejudice but indeed this is the best that she can be and it is only for him.

But this time, they finally have something tangible, visible, REAL even, to actually feast about.

…

Ino. Scorned, beautiful, bloody, murderous Ino, who slept each torturous night trying to shove the knife in her throat, only to wake up wanting to stab it to another's- becomes just that. Their topic. "I just feel sorry for her." Hinata says the moment the hopeless blonde fell into another of her drug-induced sleep, the sole thing that stops her from coming down the stairs and finishing things with Shikaku once and for all. Believe it or not, one of those vile things can be your best conscience. The Hyuuga's eyes are creased, almost unfocused. But Sasuke can tell that she is thinking. "And to tell you the truth I always feel sorry for perps. True crime writers usually do. And I wondwer whether I would make a fortune if that sympathy is worth anything."

Hinata has always been one so interested with sensational crime. Sasuke only smiles. "You know that some archaic saying about scorned women? You are just human. And there's no reason for you to hate that sentiment. We all react differently to every situation, to every life history, through every roadblock but you have to admit that once you hear some sob stories, it turns that it makes a lot of sense why they turned out that way."

She nods in acknowledgement—not necessarily in agreement as a grave frown of concentration takes over her face. Temari's wanton moans go unheard and ignored in the background. So he continues. "There's that moment in their lives you see. Where they go from being victims to being perpetrators of their own crime. That is a very confusing moment for most. On one side, you feel sorry. But on the other more sensible one, you actually breathe in a sigh of relief and be glad that they are arrested."

"And is just that like the moment just before an abused child hurts the house cat?" Her eyes are incriminating as she coolly regards him, asking, demanding, wanting an answer to the unasked, taboo question: and is it also like a kid too-smart for his own good to be unguided because of some miserable parents and think that it should make sense and isn't that worse than killing cats and what different are you to these perps we are talking about anyway and do you really make as much sense as you try to imply Sasuke-kun ?

Sasuke, genius and always one step ahead can tell that this is exactly what Hinata, cynical now as her experiences made her and curious as the natural writer takes over, is thinking.

But he makes sure he looks dubious enough. "What do you mean?"

Her eyes are accusing. She cannot hide that. He has eyes everywhere right? "One minute he's innocent. Next, he's a monster."

"Yeah." He says hesitantly, shrugging. "That's the line."

And in just a few seconds, Hinata has managed to take control over the flow. Brows furrowed, she drawls. "All of our pity on one side and all of our hate on the other. That is what I feel. In this world, there is of course the black and the white but before that there is gray. And once they choose what side to take, it's all over for them. Do you see what I mean, Sasuke-kun?"

"No more pity? But it sure keeps everyone awake at night."

"True. It's the moment that I now want to define in my writings. Innocent to monster. Alive and safe to not. It's the moment that makes the difference, something that we should understand but we actually don't."

Watching Temari writhe under the bindings in Two, Sasuke realizes that this conversation will not be over soon. Far from it. Her lips are set into a grim line and it looks like she is beginning to regret something.

But he has made sure that this would never backfire. This is his spiderweb. And he can see everything.

Hinata's tone is quiet, daring. But he does not miss the coaxing, the drive to know more. He wonders if she is always this inquisitive, whether she really is always like the traditional heroine of a murder mystery. Cordelia Gray snooping. He just hopes she would never fall in a well she couldn't clamber up from and become Alice in an inescapable Wonderland. An eternal realm of dreams. "What made you do this Sasuke-kun? I'm just curious because I know you understand, this is too much for me. "

And so he starts telling her what she wants to hear.

Most likely, it probably is far from the real, dark truth.

But even Uchiha Sasuke does not know that.

…

.

Of course, when she made the call to Kiba, Hinata has already made sure that Sasuke—or any of those spying Sharingan eye—is not within eavesdropping range. At the pretext of a perfunctory, uneventful jog, she made the escape, meanwhile making sure that bringing her cellphone with her is going to be as insconpicous as just a teenager wanting to have some background music while strolling around burning fat. Even though the reality is that she doesn't even have much music in her phone. And that Sasuke probably is aware of that.

But she left the guy sleeping peacefully in his own unit, after he asked for another round in the "viewing seat" and after so much of hearing seven different couples moan in ecstacy all at the same time, she had readily agreed. And boy if that didn't feel great and here she is still wondering what those so sexual-gratification-baloney in Criminal Psychology 101 in one of Naruto's political science classes is all about.

What is she turning into?

Kiba sounds groggy when he answered. He never is the morning person, Hinata remembers fondly. And she just woke him up.

She's all to business after the much mandatory greetings. "I need some information about the laws concerning invasion of privacy." She begins. "Specifically, when someone bugs a video camera on an apartment and rents it out."

"Hm?" Kiba's tone is unfocused, careless. "Tenant is unaware?"

You being unaware, yes, she wants to say. But she stops herself just in time. She has heard of Sasuke's explanation and she wants, really, really wants to help him. "Yes. And the phone is being tapped too, among other things."

Among other things…

What other things?

Kiba is shrewd enough to ask (She could imagine him now, eyebrows raised and his grin sheepish): "Is this for some book you want to write?"

"Yes." From Kiba's incredulity, she knows the whole thing is beyond ridiculous. Hinata would have thought so too if she didn't see it firsthand. "I hope it still is a gray area." With Sasuke indeed, nothing could be absurd for long. Perfection had once been. And now that she knows he is not, she can see how ludicrous could things get with him.

"I'm from the CID division of the Police. Traffic for now but that is just temporary. But I can tell you that an unauthorized phone tap is federal offense at least. Perhaps state too but let me check on that first."

Trust Kiba to be the best source of info. "I thought as much."

"I'll get back to you about the videocamera. And by the way, is this for business or espionage purposes? You could make a denouement by having the guy a CIA or whatnot and have it be justified blah blah."

I wish, she thought. Sometimes, she is surprised how sniffing around dead bodies has significantly improved Kiba's once brash vocabulary. "No. it's just a matter of watching."

He chuckles. Knowingly. "Ah. And the heroine moves in."

"How did you guess?"

Her life is such an open book.

"I could hear it in your voice." Kiba replies. Chuckling. "I know you better than you probably know yourself. And let me guess some more, she fell in love with the I-bet-so-handsome-pervert too, right?"

….

Five minutes later, Kiba tells her that unfortunately ("And fortunately, for your book, ah!"), there is no specific charge for videocamera tapping in a commercial enterprise. Particularly, if it is in some way written sugarcoatingly on a twenty-page contract that nobody ever bothers to read. "Of course, there is the five-year federal offense for the phone." He adds this pitifully, as if to make up on this depressing state of Konoha's law. Hinata remembers the time when Naruto enumerated all the laws that he would pass once he becomes Hokage. She wonders if in all his inherent creativity, he would ever think of creating this ordinance even though he himself is not very mindful of the thing called privacy. "But for the CCTV, the most your guy will get is a charge for peeping."

"A slap of the wrist, you mean."

Why is Hinata not surprised?

"Of course there could be a legislation pending." He tries but even Kiba sounds unsure.

Relief is in her veins and Hinata is not quite sure how to decipher that.

Thin line, she remembers. Between pity and hate. Between condemned innocence and monstrosity. And she hopes that Sasuke would not dare cross it.

…..

"Don't talk to me, dummy. I'm still pissed off at you." This is thrown as an agitated admonishment as she took off the loom bands from her slightly sweat-soaked hair, white eyes glancing sideways at the smirking countenance of the very, exquisitely naked, aroused man on the bed. Sasuke has remarkable endurance, comparable to Naruto's even. Both sex had been great. But the ones with Sasuke's had been comfortable and without attachments, until now. He stares at her up and down, licking his lips. She regards him wearily. "And please don't look so smug. I'm still watching you."

"I know." He croons, cheeky and in a creepy impersonation of a child. Shamelessly, he strokes himself before her, his expression carefully blank. "And I don't mind."

"Don't watch me too." She is to her surprise, unperturbed by this display. Hinata rolls her eyes and goes back to the imminent business. "Or anyone else please."

This time, Sasuke's brows shoot up in alarm. "What?"

He probably thought I enjoyed it, she thinks. Well, she did indeed.

"That was the last one." She tells him firmly. "When I think of all the conversations you listened in. The bathroom. The nights you recorded. Sasuke-kun, I just couldn't bear to have you keep doing that. Last night, you promised me to let me to take over things in our relationship from now on. And I want you to lock that room up and stay with me on the 21st for some time. That's all I ask."

This is not really the first time she asked a man to cohabit with her. Naruto had been her first. And he had readily agreed.

"Seriously, Hinata? On a Saturday?" Petulance in that outburst is an understatement. Sulky. A child denied of what he wants. "Everybody's home at that time."

"The locksmiths are also open on Sundays." She rebutts. She sits before him on the bed, puts her arms around him. "I asked Kiba,"

"Kiba." He repeats the name in disgust, clearly unhappy. "Kiba."

So she tells him what she learned.

His mood improves.

"I told you so." This time, the smirk is smugger and more apparent. Hinata feels an unnaturally violent impulse of wanting to wipe that out of his face. Sasuke is with arrogance and there definitely is nothing he should be proud with. Ethics or lack thereof is one thing. Denying it blatantly is another. "And did you know that I once presented this idea to the Byakugan Optics? I should mention that Hyuuga Hiashi, your father had been very interested."

There are few things that could surprise Hyuuga Hinata now. Her father is never the most ethical of men. "And oh, what happened?"

"I essentially vanished from the face of the Earth. Or at least, the geeky intern he knows as Susanoo left. I'm sure your Daddy is still lamenting over the lost revenues of selling my technology to the CIA. Orochimaru gave me a better offer. When the guy went insane, I started to take over the Sound. Rich right? He lives in the building too and he has some interesting tastes. I suspect that Kabuto is in love with him as well."

"The penalty for phone tapping is five years." She reminds him but even the sternest she could get sounds hollow and unconvincing. Sasuke just shrugs.

"I can untap them anytime." He suggests dismissively. "We just can watch. Small potatoes eh?"

Audibly, Hinata sighs. Thoroughly exasperated. "Small, immoral potatoes you mean?"

He pointedly ignores the jibe. "And it's not really just a matter of watching. The unpredictability. The variety. And never knowing what happens next. It's like the difference of watching a movie-accident and a real one."

Hinata doesn't want to admit hew hypnotic her own experience had been. But he probably could see it already. He has… eyes everywhere. "No more Sasuke-kun, please."

"Sure." Scripted, noncommitant. He obviously does not mean it one bit. Hinata glares at him. "I know. I promised. Even though Ino might just decide to kill Yoshino instead. Today. You know how desperate she is."

"The wife is there? I thought she is with a girlfriend or something. And only the son is there… who is with the girl."

"None of your business, eh?." He kisses her neck.

Fuck you. She wants to scream but Hinata had always been better than a Rated T censor.

"Shikamaru actually knows about the cameras so if either of his parents die, he knows where to go. Ino is in danger, friend or not." He tells her. This succeeds on surprising her actually. He elaborates "He decided not to bother me about this too. He's lazy, ambitionless. And he thinks of everything as troublesome. He probably only likes the idea of somebody watching them get kinky and all. We are catching up by the way. We're the third now in the building."

Halfway already on taking her jogging clothes off, Hinata moans. "I wish to hell, this is not so wrong."

"It's considered wrong." Sasuke murmurs, his tongue out in concentration as he pumped his fingers inside her. "But nobody gets hurt right? And everyone would do it if they have the chance."

Innocent and monster.

Right and wrong.

Dead and alive.

Knowing and not knowing.

"Half hour." She concedes and Sasuke smiles at her, satisfied.

…

.

They set up the alarm to one hour.

Then two hours.

Then three.

Then not at all as Sasuke just plainly turned the relentlessly ringing thing off for good and Hinata let him.

"I didn't expect it to be this boring." She remarks, squinting at the multitude of screens in front of them. She expected a lot, wished for it even. And she actually secretly wants to view something juicy before they close the place down permanently. Saturday afternoon and there is nothing good on Sasuke's reality TV. Just a few fans of awful dramas. She tells him so. "I thought it was supposed to be continous fascination."

"Saturday afternoons is not primetime. They are not yet home." He is defensive, she can tell. Understandably so. He leans closer to the console, presses a few buttons and shenanigans Hinata has not inkling about and says. "We can backtrack if you want. Walk on memory lane."

Icons are clicked. There are dates.

"You kept recordings? How often do you that?"

He clicks on a folder entitled "Hinata".

"I used to record a lot the first year but thwen I am in no way a one man information technology center. Now, it's only just for major events."

She looks away, draws a much needed breath. "I can't believe it."

"I have the one when you first moved in. So beautiful. The night you are in the tub, touching yourself. Our first night together—we are probably the only couple in the world who has it. And oh, of course all of our adventures. I thought it would be really fun when we are old and wrinkly but still horny."

"It's something we can't show our children." Realizing what she said, she sighs. "Not that we would have any."

"Well, we could adopt."

"Thank you." She answers sincerely. She appreciates his willingness. "And you have a nephew anyway."

Sasuke chuckles. Uncomfortably.

"It would have been nice though." She looks at all the machines, the technology. At the ease and expertise that which Uchiha Sasuke handles it. "if you have put all your smarts in something worthwhile."

"Hn."

"I'll give you time." She resumes, folding her arms. "So that my father won't recognize you anymore. And think: this is the nerdy kid who thought he's a one-man CIA. I wonder what happened to him."

They laugh together, anticipating a brighter future. She would help him. And he would make her forget everything but the fact that she is the only woman in the world who could have made Uchiha Sasuke be someone else other than an exceptionally skilled peeping Tom.

She always feels especially beautiful around him. The feeling of inadequacy has been what made her leave Naruto after all.

Three-o'clock strikes.

Sasuke smirks. "Shion is having a seance. Because apparently she is starting to believe that Jashin is not a real god and she's looking for other deities to worship in the meantime. That woman likes to put faith on the wrong things."

"Hidan was a Jashinist too." She reflected reminscently, remembering the albino who had several times been indicted by the publishing company for masturbating on her author pictures. She had only known about it when it had already happened for the third time and Hidan was forever lost on thinking she was his. Naruto had been more than livid and that was when all things went downhill. "I assume you already know about him?" she asks Sasuke.

He nods. "I did my homework after your pink-haired lawywer left. I'm glad he's dead by the way."

"You say you have recorded the night at the tub… when I was touching myself?" By this time, Hinata has gone past the point of being ashamed. This man has seen her already in various compromising positions. Hell, they already fucked a hundred ways. "Did you jerk off that time as well?"

"Who wouldn't?" At least he was honest. "You turned me on and you know that if you leave that unattended it would hurt."

"Do you jerk off when you watch a couple do it too?"

"Same as when I watch porn. But nothing as intense as when I watched you."

She shakes her head, amused. "Don't patronize me."

Kiba had always insistently denied that she was his first erection.

Naruto said he was not possesive, just protective.

Hidan said he was hers and there was nothing wrong with that.

"I was actually thinking about you when I did that." She tells him, unsure if it is true. But it probably is. It does not matter. He was very impressive back then. Sasuke kisses her right after and it leaves her breathless.

"Hinata…" he groans in her mouth and she could feel his arms tightening around her. It is a familiar sensation. And she loves it. His lower regions are poking her thigh. Sometimes, she just cannot get over on how big this man is, on how big she made him be. "You're tempting me to do the chair position again. I thought we were done this morning."

"Well, we certainly can use the pasttime."

Seven-o'clock and most of the tenants are already home.

"Sai. A painter who has had skirmishes with both men and women. He actually asked Ino who you were last week. They had comfort sex and Ino told him to call his perverse desires off because we are dating."

"He looks like you."

"He's gay."

The gray-haired bookseller comes in. Sasuke refers to him simply as 'Kakashi'. "I think he knows something." He admits, playing with her hair. "But I'm not sure."

"Any antagonist in a mystery-drama would have killed him right away."

He snorts. "But oh, I prefer to be the protagonist of this story."

Protagonist and heroine.

Oh, Kiba.

"Protagonists are not always nice." She thinks of a perfect example. "Look at Yagami Raito. He could kill his father if it means he continues to be Kira and L at the same time."

"I have to disagree at the father part. " he says. "But he's not really nice, yes."

"He wasted what should have been a good friendship."

"Well he has ambitions for this world."

"It's not the right one."

"It's not considered the right one." He paraphrases his own retort. Quite witty of him. "There's a difference."

Asuma and Kurenai start making love.

"Hey, what time is it?" Hinata prompts, unsure if she is ever going to see her former nurse in the same, dispassionately respectful way ever again after seeing her gwet poked from behind in full view.

Sasuke looks at the clock, chuckles. "Geez. Twelve hours."

"It's boring."

"A few more." He suggests.

14B. The Gekos, naked on their bed, working for the best way to get the wifey pregnant. Hinata can recognize the strenous drill.

She takes control of the right-side monitors. He takes control of the left.

Innocent and monster.

Innocent to monster.

They watch Inoichi and Tenten.

And Ino.

And even good, old Shiho, who has her own ears on the wall.

….

"This is a major event." Sasuke mournfully, sarcastically, frustratingly mutters to himself some distance from behind Hinata. But it is intentionally loud enough for her to hear anyway. Sasuke is being his brutally blunt, frowning, spoiled self today. He is impeccable as always. Handsome as ever as he watches her put on the most sophisticated of padlocks she got the Sunday locksmiths to forge for her. She hears Sasuke sigh for the nth time of the day, his tone exasperated. "I should be recording this. This is a major event, you know."

Thinking of it as a lighthearted joke that can be attributed to his rather acerbic humor, Hinata chuckles freely.

"It's all about us, Sasuke-kun." She tells him, her back to him. She cannot see his expression. His eyebrows are probably raised in askance, arms folded. She leans towards the lower bolts. Four is already in place. Different keys. Two of which has to be turned at the same time on two padlocks to unlock the third, biggest one."And indeed this is a major event. We are actually moving forward. Isn't that amazing?"

"I'm now living with you." he says, voice almost sounding like it is shrugging. "I can watch you all day when I want to. That is better than any alternative."

Now as the last lock clicks into place, Hinata stands to her full height to survey what she has done. 21-B is officially closed to the world, she muses. Five bolts. Something that could only be opened by two people who know the password that Hinata has paperlessly kept to herself.

She holds a hand up for Sasuke, expression expectant. "Come on?"

And so they leave behind the 21st floor. Hinata's heels click on the tiled floor. Sasuke walks beside her, solemn and being the quietest he has been for some time. She wants to apologize. But she knows that Sasuke would only tell her that all is well to patronize her. In a sense, this reminds her so much of Naruto. Sasuke is never above complimenting anyone with their skills but how much of this is sincerity compared to sheer manipulation for others to submit to his will?

Is Sasuke the same as all the other CEOs in this world?

She wants to apologize.

Not because she is starting to doubt whether this is the right thing to do.

No

This is because she does not even have the courage to throw away the keys and she wonders how she could ever stop Sasuke from watching when she herself does not want to.

Sasuke's eyes follow her thoughts.

And he smirks to himself.

…..

.

….

.

Ah. I have a particularly busy week in my workplace right now. It makes me regret that at eighteen, I already left my school life and has chosen to work my butt off but I'm broke and my job, though it is marginally hard pays well.

I finally reached a hundred reviews. Whew. And the evilness is still at the beginning stage. Even in canon, Sasuke is really a one-dimensional character. I want to make him more complicated here and explore the more improbable, evil side of SasuHina where we try to condone Sasuke's ill-deeds and think it should be happily-ever-after. Next chapter is in the Obsession part. Prepare for more revelations and I will try to end this at the same time that the manga will. (SasuSaku really went down the drain last chapter, eh? And NaruSasu.. speechless about that)

I have the feeling that this fanfic is really getting unbearably complicated. Please tell me so. I really want to hear your thoughts. Review and much love.