To tell you the truth, I never used to think too much about Kenny. See, Eric and the other fellas used to hang out with me sometimes. Sometimes they could be really friendly to me, sometimes really mean, too. Eric would get me into all sorts of trouble. And Stan and Kyle were always havin' these big adventures and kinda steam blowin' through everybody else on the way. I guess that's just how kids can get. Nobody's perfect in the third grade. No matter what, though, those boys made an impression.

But Kenny was a bit different. He'd tag along on those adventures, sure, but he was never really a part of the group. Just kind of there. He never really said nothin', and he had a habit of just kinda wanderin' off whenever he got bored.

Stan and Kyle never seemed to notice when that happened, either. It was almost like Kenny was a prop—around when ya needed him, for a bit. Mostly there 'cause you're used to somethin' bein' there. Like he was just a part of their set to make an even number. I barely noticed him the first couple times we all hung out.

Then it made be wonder if it was always like that, with that group. When the four of 'em all hung out and played video games, did Kenny open up and make 'em laugh? Did he tell good stories? Or always make yummy snacks? Or just make ya feel real comfortable around him?

Why did they hang out with him?

I suppose, in all honestly, I wondered those things the most after he was gone. When Stan and Kyle and Eric all started wanting me to replace him. Boy, howdy, that sure was hard! I barely even knew Kenny, and now they wanted me to be Kenny? Well that there made me purdy angry, to tell ya the truth! Especially when they kicked me outta the group for not bein' enough like Kenny.

Years later, I began to think about that again. Now, knowin' what I know, it makes me even angrier. I know people grieve in different ways and whatnot, but those fellas didn't even care that Kenny was gone! They just wanted their fourth again (their fourth specifically: gutsy, crude and entertaining). They weren't sad about Kenny, just missin' that prop and not content with me as a stand in.

After Kenny came back, I started watchin' more closely. I started tryin' to find out what it was about Kenny that those fellas were all concerned about. When I finally did, I realized why I was their first pick for a replacement. Kenny did more than just tag along—he did whatever those guys told him to! Now, I've always been a pushover, so I can see why they thought I'd be a good substitute, but that wasn't all. He'd push back. So after all this time I realized what they wanted was some spunky, belligerent, tough puppy to follow them into the line of fire! Well, no sir, I was havin' none of that!

It was around fourth grade when I figured something else out about Kenny. He was super eager to please. I think I know why, too. Me, I always wanna make people happy, so I try to do as I'm told. Kenny wanted someone to make happy. He tried so gall-darn hard to try to make Stan and Kyle—and even Eric—happy because he was lonely. Stan and Kyle always had each other. They were somethin' like super duper best friends. And Eric had himself. I know—boy, do I know!—that Eric ain't really a super duper best friend to anyone, no matter how happy you try to make him. Tryin' to be Eric's friend can make a guy feel purdy lonely.

Kenny looked really lonely with his eyes all red and face stained with cat pee and I tried to hand him coffee. And he looked real lonely all dressed in black and tryin' like heck to convince his friends that his powers are real. I felt really lonely, too, behind bars and hopin' I could convince my friends that I really needed to get out from behind those bars. Kenny didn't even realize that, well, I mighta thought he was crazy at the time, but if he'd tried to convince me, I mighta listened. He didn't realize that I coulda been someone he tried to make happy. 'Cause I'da been right there, tryin' to make him happy back.

It wasn't too long after that that I started gettin' really sore at everyone. 'Cause of how everything was so easy for the Ben Afflecks, and the Stan-and-Kyles of the world. They all got to be the stars of their own lives, not like me and Kenny. We always got tossed off to the side and forgotten while the show went on for the protagonists. Even as a villain, I rarely got a lead role. And then I said some really mean things to everyone. Stan-and-Kyle and Eric, and stupid Scott Malkinson! Kenny was to only one with any sense of decency, I told 'em.

I wanted to tell them that he was the only one who knew.

After goin' to Hawaii together, I had whatcha call an "epiphany". The whole time we were there, he was tryin' to make me happy. And yeah, he was still writin' to the others back home, makin' them happy, but for once, he was tryin to help me out too. So I started thinkin', and I decided that if no one else would be our super duper best friends, Kenny and I might as well work on makin' each other happy as we could.

So we started spendin' more time together. A little at first, then more frequently. Like every time we were in a big group, we'd kinda drift together, extra pieces from sets that tossed us aside, forming our own set outta convenience. At a pep rally, he'd sit down next to me and I'd smile, and we'd watch it together while Stan-and-Kyle bickered with Eric and the girls chattered and the goths smoked and everybody did what they did in their sets. Even if he didn't talk much, I knew he was feelin' purdy good about finally bein' included. I know I sure was.

Then about the time we started middle school, things started changin'. Kenny always had a thing for the girls. He would carry around dirty magazines and flirt with the other team's cheerleaders at basketball games and hung around Tammy Warner all the time (she always made me nervous, I couldn't help but worry she'd hurt him one day). Once everybody started hittin' puberty, Kenny was quick to get friendly with the girls that were feelin' a little down about their bodies. He stopped wearin' that hood over his face, and he got real animated and happy, all smiles and winks. From what I heard (from Red and the other girls, Kenny never was one to kiss 'n' tell), he was quite a smooth talker. He never really dated anyone for too long, but all the girls loved him, even sayin' years later he was one of the best boyfriends they ever had, always nice and gentlemanly, not to mention very generous in other departments (I didn't like to hear about that stuff, but girls always liked to talk about it for some reason). Wendy was the only girl who never really liked Kenny, and I'm not sure why. I even asked her about it, but all she ever said was that Kenny was makin' a spectacle of himself, "and that's not entirely becoming." Kenny said she was just a bitter ol' prude who got jealous of anyone who had the balls to go out and get what they wanted regardless of what people might start sayin'. Wendy was purdy preoccupied with what people thought of her.

Anyway, after all of that started to happen, Kenny wasn't really hanging around me anymore. We'd never been really close or nothin', but I was sad, on accounta I considered him to be my best friend. For a couple years there, I didn't have nobody to sit next to during pep rallies or anything. I had my other friends, like Eric and Clyde and Tweek and all of them, but they weren't the same as Kenny. I thought Kenny and I had, well, somethin' special. But I guess I musta been wrong.

Then, outta the blue, Kenny disappeared again. This was about the tail end of ninth grade, when Tammy Warner moved to Florida with her family and Kenny got real sad. He musta really liked her, to be so broken up about her leavin'. I knew she would break his heart, and seein' him shrink quietly back into his hood, lookin' like that ol' prop again, made me real sore. Partly 'cause, well, he never looked that sad when it was me that wasn't around.

He was gone for about five months. I remember bein' real nervous, cause he hadn't been gone that long since he went away for a while in the fourth grade. And just before he left, he'd gotten real sick, too. He had this disease, with a really long name that I don't remember. He got skinny, all bones and grey skin.

It was real scary.

Then he was gone. And I missed the other piece of my set.

Author's Note: First of all, thank you for reading! I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this story, but I have a few ideas. This is kind of a prologue for the main story; so let me know what you all think of the style so far