Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-man

AN: Well, this is the last chapter. I hope you all enjoyed my first successful attempt at a long(ish) fic. Thanks for reading!

Later that day at dinner, Lenalee picked at her spaghetti bolognese and wondered where Lavi had gone off to. She hadn't seen him since he had jumped out the window during breakfast. She had even asked Bookman where the redhead was, but the old man just muttered something about idiocy and Beijing before returning to his room to pack a suitcase. Lenalee would have been worried that the moron had actually died falling out the window, but he hadn't died the first time, so he was probably okay.

Lenalee was interrupted from her reverie by Kanda's angry stomping footsteps. He slumped onto the seat beside her and immediately dug into his soba noodles, barely sparing her a hateful glare. He was still wearing the outfit she had forced him into, though she could spot a few places where it had been torn and dirtied. Well, boys will be boys. Besides, that meant she could play dressing doll with him later. Allen sat down on her other side, wearing a different sweater than he put on that morning, since he had gotten the first one dirty while training. She hadn't even told him to change, which meant she had trained him well in the ways of femininity.

Suddenly the room fell quiet. Again. The Black Order HQ hadn't seen so many awkward silences since her big brother had 'accidentally' spilled truth serum in the baths. The silence was broken when someone yelled, "Not again! What the hell is this, a drag bar?!"

The sudden outburst drew Lenalee's eyes to the entrance, the sight of which caused her to spit-take a mouthful of milk all over Allen's new sweater. There, awkwardly hovering by the doorway, was Lavi. Wearing a dress. Well, on closer inspection it wasn't actually a dress. It was actually a forest green plaid skirt tastefully paired up with an emerald-colored cardigan and a modest cream camisole that perfectly matched his stockings. If not for the pair of muddy combat boots that stuck out like a fox in a hen house, it would have been a modest yet refined outfit that Lenalee herself would enjoy wearing on one of her few days out. Even Lavi's headband had been replaced by a length of satiny ribbon in almost the exact same shade as his one visible eye.

When he reluctantly started walking into the cafeteria, Lenalee noticed something worthy of another spit-take. Lavi was wearing makeup. Not anything gaudy, just some pale pink lipstick, blush, and an attempt at eyeliner, but it was enough to make her wonder if her idiotic mad scientist of a brother had accidentally sent her into a parallel universe.

Lavi caught Lenalee's gaze and strode towards her with a determined gleam in his outlined eyes. Without a word, he sat across from her, spread his arms wide to show off his new outfit, and asked, "So, what do you think?"

"Very nice," Lenalee commented, her fashionista instincts taking over automatically, "Green is a great color for you, and I admire your use of cream as a neutral. However, I feel that a bolder lip color would suit you better, in a shade of red or perhaps coral, and the combat boots have got to go."

Lavi blinked at her, shocked at her reaction. "Combat boots are the only shoes I had."

"Well, we will definitely have to fix that," Lenalee stated, before addressing the elephant in the room, "By the way, why are you cross-dressing? You seemed to strongly object to the idea just this morning."

Lavi grinned, baring his teeth like a rabid fox. "If you can't beat them, join them, am I right?"

Alarms bells went off in her head. It took her barely a second to piece it all together. "You were planning to shock me with your appearance and run away with Allen while I was distracted, weren't you?" she asked, watching him carefully as she sipped at her milk.

The look on Lavi's face told her everything she needed to know. Lenalee clicked her tongue disapprovingly. "Do you really think so little of me, Lavi? Not to insult your intelligence or anything, but a concussed Komlin could think up something better than that."

Lavi stared at her with a look that was equal parts disappointment and indignation. Lenalee chose to ignore him, devoting her attention to her dinner instead. Soon the hall was filled with the sounds of clinking forks and idle chatter. A little after that, Allen and Kanda were called to Komui's office to prepare for a mission, leaving her alone with Lavi. At that point she looked up from her spaghetti bolognese only to see Lavi still staring at her, not having seemed to have so much as twitched.

As Lenalee went back to her meal, determined to pack in as much of the delicious food as she could, girlish figure be damned, when Lavi abruptly stood up, slammed his hands on the table, and screamed, in a rather high-pitched and squeaky manner, "WHYYYYYYY?"

She dropped her fork. This apparently signaled for the redheaded lunatic to go into a full-blown rant.

"Why are you making Allen and Yuu wear those stupid girly things? They're men, dammit! Why are you trying to make them into women? Aren't there some other girls you can go play dress-up doll with? It's freaking embarrassing, to them and to everyone who has to look at them! WHY?!"

Lenalee stared at Lavi. The dining hall had fallen quiet, the silence only broken by the redhead's panting, being out of breath after his half-screamed speech. She looked down at her dinner plate, not wanting to look her friend in the eye.

"I'm sorry," she said, eyes still downcast, "It's just, there aren't any girls my age around here. Actually, I've never had any friends that were girls. I'm not saying that you and Allen and Kanda aren't great, but you're all guys, so it's different. I guess I wanted to feel what it was like to have female friends to talk about clothes, jewelry, and all that other stuff that you guys don't really care about with."

Lenalee looked up, feeling the beginnings of a tear welling up in her eye. Lavi had the most shocked expression on his face. The sight of it almost made her giggle.

"I'm the one who should be sorry," Lavi muttered, refusing to meet her gaze, "I didn't think of that, and I'm a Bookman. I'm supposed to think of everything."

Lenalee smiled at him as he nervously tugged at his hair ribbon. She stood up and patted him on his cardigan-clad shoulder. "It's okay Lavi, apology accepted. You can go put on some pants now."

Lavi frowned thoughtfully, before he looked her in the eye and grinned. "Or we could go to your room and give each other makeovers, or whatever it is girls do."

Lenalee laughed, surprised and happy at this turn of events. She shifted her hand to his elbow and steered him to the exit, practically skipping with joy as Lavi stumbled after her. When his back was turned to her, her smile melted into a smirk. She wondered what Lavi would look like in a corset and petticoats.

Lavi saw the smirk, but didn't comment. He was her friend after all, and friends apparently cross-dress to make each other happy. It wasn't like he had much masculine pride left after the incident with the Eliade akuma and the emotionally sensitive carnivorous flowers, after all. Besides, the breeze around his privates was oddly enjoyable. He should wear skirts more often!

.•*•.•*•.

Several miles from the Black Order HQ, on a ship headed east, Bookman felt the irresistible urge to beat his head against the mast. He rested it in his hands instead, sighing deeply. He didn't know why, but he was struck by the sudden awareness that his moronic apprentice was doing something stupid.

"Idiot," he muttered, kneading his forehead. He just prayed that the Black Order would still be standing when he came back.