I got bored and was watching Alice in Wonderland...this is what came of it. I was surprised at how much more plot than sex there was but eh I like it. Also not betad yet because I was really excited but it has been sent to my beta so hopefully there are not too many mistakes yet. If there are please paint them out and I will try to fix them thx! R&R please!

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Broken, Underland

"12 years," Alexander murmured turning his gaze to the sky. Fog and smoke drifted in lazy circles as they obscured the stars from view and clogged the air. The citizens of Broken, Underland were used to the thick cloying air and the smog that constantly hid the sky from view and so most never even really noticed anymore, but Alex would always miss the stars even as he himself began to accept the conditions of his home as normal. The clatter of wooden wheels on broken cobblestones reached Alex's ears as the young man attempted to see past the curling smoke to what he knew lay beyond. He didn't pay much mind to the sound as the people of Broken never truly slept and instead worked day and night to survive. Thieves and murderers made resting dangerous in Broken which was the cause of the dark, permanent circles beneath Hadrian's flat, expressionless muddy brown eyes.

Shorn, dirty blond locks blew lazily in the wind and Hadrian pulled at them in mild annoyance. He always kept his hair as short as possible to avoid knots and possible advantages for any who wished him harm but without a mirror it was always difficult to know if he had cut all the strands and apparently he had missed a few this time. Not that he found he cared all too much, not that Alex cared about anything all too much anymore.

The clattering wheels of a carriage drew near again but Alex didn't turn to look towards the noise as he lay in the blackened foliage that burned at his exposed skin and tore at his flesh when he moved. The tattered white overcoat and pants he wore didn't really help much against the vicious, thorny plants that grew in Broken, but some clothes were better than none and Alex would not complain. He remembered the last time he had been naked, selling himself nightly at a brothel to get by and losing hope as the days turned to weeks and then to months. The work had killed whatever self-worth Alex had held within himself and shattered the last of his sanity.

His three hundredth and twenty-second day in the brothel was the first time he had ever killed another creature and the blood that had warmed Alex's frozen skin had become addicting to him. Now, nine years later and eighteen years old, Alex had killed over a thousand creatures and bathed in the blood of all of them. After the brothel only the blood of others had warmed him and then after The Mistake he had bathed in the blood of over a hundred unfortunate souls. Blood and death were Alex's only true friends. That was why he was known in all of Underland as the Bloody Executioner and why he had taken a red heart as his symbol.

Most of the beings in Underland believed he obeyed the Red Queen because of his insignia but in truth Alex hadn't even known Underland had a ruler when he chose the heart and after he found out he had refused to change it. Alex had a reputation in Broken and he wouldn't break it for some bloody Queen with too large of a head. But all of this had happened years ago and Alex found he didn't care anymore. He was retired as far as he saw it and now he simply watched the smog in the air and waited for death to claim him. He had lost hope after The Mistake and a person without hope was no person at all. Alex had lost his reason for living and soon he would stop living.

"12 years," Alex murmured again almost forlornly at the sky. Twelve years since he had followed his sister down a rabbit hole. Twelve years since he had been spit out in a garbage coated, filth soaked city to be ruined and tormented and broken. Twelve years since Alex had been innocent and one month, twenty-three days since he had given up his final hope and dream. One month and twenty-three days since what had been left of Alex's heart was shredded to pieces and stomped on and he had been left to die as one uncared for, unloved, un-mourned, and forever forgotten.

Alex sneered at his own thoughts. Just because he had lost all hope didn't give him a reason to act like a sappy priss. Alex Kinglseigh would never be weak no matter the consequences and even if he had no hope, and thus no reason to live, he wouldn't die moaning and complaining about life. He had dug his own hole when he decided to fall in love with a creature of Top, Underland, no matter how knowledgeable he had seemed of life in Broken. No one in from the Top knew of true suffering. White Queen or Red no one in Broken cared for they were all the same, and no Queen ever cared for those in the land of Broken.

Alex felt only contempt with himself over his fallacies and hated his heart for ever loving a creature from the Top. Especially one so devoted to the White Queen as his…no not his anymore, as the Queen's Hatter was. The Mad Hatter, Alex thought brokenly as he laid himself down upon the glass like weeds that grew on his stretch of land. They cut into his skin shallowly, leaving behind small rivers of red, but Alex took no notice other than to relish the small pain as his thoughts dragged him back into the memories of his Hatter, Tarrant Hightop, and the time they and spent together.

Alex had met the Hatter on one of his few excursions to the Top, when one of his targets had decided it would be a wonderful place to escape to. Alex had found him three hours later and tortured the filthy horse until he begged for death: The Bloody Executioner did not like to be up top. But this excursion hadn't ended with the death of his target for he had run across a mad man at a tea party on his own. There were dozens of other place settings and from what Alex remembered it had looked as if others had been there recently but had just left.

The Mad Hatter had coerced, Alex hadn't had the motivation to try and leave such a sexy man, him into staying for a while and enjoying tea. To say it had been interesting was a major understatement. Alex had been enthralled by the Hatter and used any excuse he could to stay up top just a bit longer, and even now that it had ended Alex couldn't find it in himself to regret his decision. Two weeks it had taken before the Hatter had made a move, though Alex had been dropping hints near constantly, and there relationship bloomed. The time Alex spent with the Hatter was the only time he could remember being happy, the first time he could remember what happiness was. Oh he was sure he had been happy before coming to Underland but the time before Broken was hard to remember. The horrors and torture Alex had gone through since nearly emptied his mind of such joys, but now he clung to the memories of love and lust he had felt when with the Hatter and let them consume him as he waited for death.

"Bloody Executioner," Alex didn't move, didn't respond, didn't even twitch as the creature called his name; however, he did feel his heart stop for just a moment for he knew the creature that had called his name. It was the White Rabbit, the friend of the Queen's Hatter. "Alice has arrived in Underland." A fierce feeling of utter fury filled Alex at the rabbit's words. So that was why his Hatter, his Terrance, had left him? Because his pretty little sister, who had never felt a smidgen of pain and would never care for Underland or anything in it, had come back?

Tarrant had been talking of over throwing the Red Queen for ages but Alex had thought nothing of it. It seems Alex's lover had thrown him away in the hopes of reinstating the 'rightful' queen to her throne through his sister Alice. But what did this have to do with him? Why should he care about the little bitch he hadn't seen in over a decade and who had never cared for him in the first place? But Alex did not voice his thoughts nor did he turn his eyes from the smog swirling lazily in the warm wind.

"Underland needs your help." The Rabbit tried, but Alex did not respond. Underland could burn to the ground around him and he would not care, in fact, he might even enjoy it. The rabbit paused as if hoping for an answer; but, when it became obvious the boy would not speak, the rabbit opened his mouth once more. "The Hatter is calling for you."

Alex was on his feet at once and one of the blades he always had with him was held at the rabbit's throat. Fury glowed brightly in Alex's brown eyes as he watched the pathetic creature tremble in fear from him. "Do not believe that you can speak such a name in my presence and live to tell about it rabbit. That worthless piece of scum means nothing to me now. Nothing!" Alex's voice was hoarse with disuse and deeper than it had ever been before.

The rabbit trembled but held his ground staring into the hard eyes of brown above him. He could tell Alex was lying, for no one acted so vehement without emotions being involved and deliberately pressed a little closer to the blade at his throat. "The Hatter needs you." Alex did not shift, dared not let himself hope. "He loves you."

Something broke in Alex at those words and he lowered the blade, it seems he would play the fool once more and follow this rabbit to the man that had broken him. "I will need new clothing." He rasped out and the rabbit fought not to smile, he was under no delusion that the man before him would kill him without a thought. Instead of speaking, which would have given away the rabbit's delight, he instead motioned to the carriage the two would be traveling in and hopped in. Alex followed shortly after carefully keeping his mind blank of what was to come.

The White Queen's castle actually hurt to look at. There was barely any colour anywhere and everything was so innocent. Alex had to fight from retching and once again wondered when his sanity had left him. It was a question he had been pondering ever since he had entered the damn carriage with that filthy little rabbit. For Alex could find no other explanation than insanity for what he was doing. The carriage rolled slowly to a stop in front of giant white doors and Alex stepped out almost fearfully. This place seemed to be pulled straight from his worst nightmares. Form the pink trees to simpering, innocent humans walking about, even the Queen herself, who had been waiting at the doors to greet them, seemed to be made of Alex's own version of horror. She held her hands up instead of letting them hang like any normal creature, and Alex found that after ten minutes of her presence he wished to cut those lily white hands of and see if she looked better covered in deliciously warm blood.

"You will be roomed with my Hatter, I believe you have met." That settled it, Alex was going to make this woman pay, and pay dearly at that. She was openly mocking him about the rejection he had been given by the Hatter and now suggested the share a room. Oh yes, she would pay dearly.

"I thank you, Your Majesty." Alex replied instead of attempting to voice the fury and burning hatred which now festered inside of him. She simply nodded and floated away in that annoyingly ditzy way of hers. Damn royalty and damn their foolish, narcissistic sense of superiority. But Alex entered the room anyway, for there was nothing else for him to do.

The Mad Hatter was sitting on a soft looking white bed and staring out the open window at the pink, blooming trees and frolicking animals. It was a rather idyllic scene for what Alex was sure would be a blood bath. Already he could feel the parts of himself that wanted to hurt the Hatter as much as the Hatter hurt him and the part that simply wanted to run into his arms warring against each other. Alex was sure he would not survive the night. "Do you know why a raven is like a writing desk?" The Hatter questioned and Alex's top lip peeled up in a sneer.

"No," he snarled out. "Nor do I care Hatter." Tarrant stiffened at the name and Alex nearly laughed. He was the only one who regularly called the Hatter Tarrant and, when in the beginning Tarranthad hated it, Tarrant now apparently missed the name. Wishy-washy bastard of a man.

"Then what do you care about Alex?" Tarrant questioned surprisingly serious for once. It was not something people were used to but Alex knew how to deal with the crazy man in any of his moods and this did not unnerve him.

"Nothing," Alex replied but they could both hear the lie in his words. Tarrant stood up from his seat on the bed and spun before coming to stand barely an inch from Alex in a flash. The movement was quick and nearly shocked Alex into taking a step back but he held himself still at the last moment and forced himself to meet his ex-lover's mesmerizing eyes.

"Little liar," The mad man cooed and a shiver ran down Alex's spine, he knew that look. "It's not good to lie, and bad boys should be punished." Alex took a step back: he couldn't do this, not again. He couldn't let himself fall prey to the Hatter again, not with damage done already to his heart. "And I know just the way to punish a bad little boy such as you."

Now Alex did run, but he didn't get far. One, two steps and then the Hatter's arms were wrapped around his waist and dragging Alex back into a warm, hard, familiar chest. There was a moment of struggle where Alex desperately tried to wiggle free without hurting Tarrant, but it was no use. Alex had never trained in anything but the most deadly of forms so he knew nothing about incapacitating another being without hurting it.

"Now, now," the Hatter tsked pressing his lips against Alex's throat and nipping sharply in reprimand. Alex melted and his muscles relaxed as he leaned back into the Hatter's hold unable to resist his heart's desire. The Hatter had always been two or three inches shorter than Alex but in the time they had been apart Alex felt as if the Hatter had grown feet, or maybe Alex had simply shrunk, but either way the Hatter now stood a good inch over Alex. "Good boy," The Hatter purred lapping at the spot he had just bitten and sending shivers of arousal down Alex's spine and straight to his groin.

Alex bit back any sound he might have made and consciously stopped all of his rational thought. He knew this wouldn't end well, knew he would only be in more pain afterwards, but if heaven was offered to you, even if it was only for a little while, would you be able to say no? Alex wasn't and so he spun and grabbed Tarrant, pulling him down for a hungry kiss full of desperation and need. If Alex was going to have to return to hell afterwards he was damn well going to enjoy the time in heaven he had been allotted.

Tarrantwas the one to break the kiss, pulling back as he panted and his eyes lost their slightly glazed look to become predatory. Alex shuddered and let a soft mewl escape his lips. The Hatter had always been more primal than anything else and fought, loved, and fucked rather like an animal, and in this situation it was Alex who bowed to the Hatter's will, not that surrendering was any great sacrifice on Alex's part.

Their sex wasn't the kind you fantasized about or read about in books. It wasn't all sweet and perfect and sexy, because honestly no one can make removing their socks sexy. But it was a reaffirmation of life and each other and the bond that may have been worn to a thread but was still somehow there. For them it meant life and love and trust and putting their broken edges together to make a picture more beautifully macabre than anything they could accomplish on their own. Sex between them meant coming home, at least it did. Now Alex only wanted the illusion of home he knew would come with their sharing of bodies, if for only one night he wanted to have that illusion back for her new, come morning, he would be left bereft and alone to find his own way in the world again. Not that he would find a way. Once you experience what life can be when you're not alone, simply surviving is no longer enough, but those thoughts were for later when Alex could wallow in them. Now was his time to enjoy.

By the time Alex was able to pull himself from the thoughts running through his head he was already half naked and lying on the bed with a fully naked Tarrant on top of him. "Where did you go?" The Hatter asked curiously even as his hand ran up and down Alex's sides and caused shivers to travel along the assassin's body.

"Inside," Alex replied pushing his pelvis up so that his hardness could meet that of his lover's. A low groan escaped the Hatter but the frown was still in place and he didn't move.

"No one is allowed inside you but me." Alex threw his head back and roared with laughter. Did that Hatter really think he could still say something like that after throwing Alex away like so much trash? A hand wrapped around Alex's throat and stopped his laughter as the Hatter brought their faces close together. "Mine," he snarled and anyone else would have been afraid of the Hatter, luckily Alex was not anyone else. Instead of cowering in fear he lifted his lip in a snarl and spat at the Hatter who dodged with surprising speed. "Perhaps," Tarrant hummed. "I need to remind you." And with that two slick fingers, and Alex was unsure when the Hatter had actually had time to slick them up, slid inside Alex who arched and cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure.

"I belong to no one." Alex snarled now only trying to infuriate Tarrant. The angrier he got the wilder and more satisfying the sex, and just as Alex had predicted the light in the Hatter's eyes grew to a blazing inferno.

Tarrant brought his lips down to devour Alex's teeth nipping and tongues swirling from one mouth to another. It was vicious and mildly bloody and full of lust and want and anger, it was perfect. Terrance, after making sure his younger lover was stretched enough not to tear, lubed himself up and then pressed forward into the tight hole that brought to him a feeling of home. Alex arched and moaned at the intrusion, it would hurt later but for now it was bliss.

They rutted like animals, vicious and wonderful, and neither cared if the whole castle heard their cries of delight. But, as they neared climax, Alex was viciously pulled from his fantasy of home and love and protection the Hatter had given him. For, when the Hatter came and his seed pumped into Alex's warm, welcoming body, it was not Alex's name that fell from the Hatter's lips but his sister Alice's.

And with one word the little part of Alex that had begun to hope, that had begun to believe that maybe, just maybe he could be happy again, shattered. As the Hatter fell panting to his side and Alex's own high froze in his veins the executioner could do nothing but stare emptily at the ceiling. He was a replacement. That was all. Nothing important or wanted. Nothing, nothing, nothing…

The word repeated in Alex's head over and over again even as he allowed the Hatter to pull Alex into a hug and even as Alex's body succumbed to exhaustion, for he had not slept in a good week, the knowledge that Alex was nothing but an Alice doll stuck with him and tore the last shreds of sanity in his mind to pieces.

We next he woke Alex found that he could feel nothing. There was no pain or horror or that horrible wanting he had become accustomed to. There was simply nothing. 'Just like me,' Alex thought mildly intrigued for a moment before even that was swept away. Beside him the bed shifted and Alex turned to see the Hatter sleeping comfortably beside him. He wanted to hate Tarrant, wanted to make the man suffer, but he simply couldn't. There was nothing left inside of himself to hate the man, nothing left at all. So instead Alex leaned over gently and pressed a soft kiss to his lover's cheek and whispered: "I forgive you Tarrant for never loving me. I forgive you for using me, and I thank you for giving me at least a taste of heaven." And then he quietly slipped out of bed.

Tarrant had wanted the Jabberwocky dead so that the White Queen could take her throne, and what Tarrant wanted Alex gave. No matter the consequences. So Alex strapped his blades back to his body and pulled on the ragged clothing the Hatter had removed earlier that day and quietly left the White Queen's castle. However, as he passed the kitchen something glinted on the table in plain view, the Vorpal sword. "I thought you might need it." Alex didn't respond to the Queen's fluttery voice and instead simply grabbed the weapon from the table and continued walking. "Where do you wish to go?" she questioned and Alex paused.

"In the field of my home underneath the black glass of Broken." They both knew he was not talking about where he wanted to go now, but where he wanted to go when they found his body. The body he knew they would find by morning. Without waiting for the Queen to say anything more Alex left the castle and headed up to where the Jabberwocky lay.

It was an easy enough battle for Alex to win. He simply slit the creature's throat as it slept and then gave it a smile as the Jabberwocky bit into his flesh before dying. The poison of a live Jabberwocky was impossible to cure. Ten minutes latter Alex joined the Jabberwocky in death with a relieved smile adorning his cold, white face.

It was the Queen who found the body, and the Queen who made the preparations to bury it in Alex's home. But the Queen herself could not travel to Broken for no royalty was welcome there. Instead only the Hatter and the rabbit and the mouse went to bury the body. Alice, who had never known her brother had fallen into Underland with her, did not attend.

After the Queen was reinstated in power the Hatter and Alice tried for a relationship, but Alice was an innocent girl. She did not understand the Hatter's moods and his sometimes vicious ways. And eventually the Hatter understood that Alice had never been what he wanted. Sometimes we find out the truth too late.

So, exactly a year after Alex's death, Tarrant walked to the clearing where he and Alex spent most of their time. He walked past the spot where they had once made love and the spot where Alex had fallen asleep with his head in the Hatter's lap and the spot where they had had their first picnic. He walked straight to the edge of the cliff where they had shared their first kiss with their legs dangling over the edge, and he continued to walk.

Once again it was the Queen who found the body. She had it buried next to Alex so that maybe in the afterlife they might find love in each other's arms, and perhaps this time it would last.