Even now his answers, to the lie detector and to Simmons' question seemed stupid.

He'd want Simmons in the box, and No, he had no hard feelings against Agent Triplett. He hated that dude. He'd always been important, been good at things. He and Simmons worked well together, they'd been top students at the Academy. Now it appeared that there was one person who could do ANYTHING better then him, AND was making a move on Jemma! JEMMA!

Jemma was... He didn't want to say his. He didn't want to sound possessive. He wasn't possessive was he? Wanting to have Jemma to himself wasn't wrong was it? Nope, he was totally creepy. He remembered when Hydra had cornered Agent May and Agent Coulson and him and he'd cried. He was crying because he was worried about Jemma and feeling total hate towards Agent John Garrett, Hydra creep. That was another reason he didn't really trust Agent Triplett, Garrett was his SO, Triplett could totally be working for Hydra, maybe the fact that he passed the Lie detector test was only attributed to Hydra being able to be manipulative and lie very easily. Of course, Garrett was Ward's SO too but Ward being evil was ridiculous...

He was tense, angry, his hand slammed down in his pockets, one hand curled around a special icer that he'd made. He wanted to get back to the lab, he didn't like being a field agent but would do it if Coulson asked him to. He felt safe under the command of Coulson, even if S.H.I.E.L.D. was disbanded and everything he knew was gone, he would be a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. He didn't really know much else in life. He'd gone to the academy to learn how to do this. And now he was doing it. And his partner, the girl who'd worked with him since the Academy, well, that girl was slipping away from him.

It was obvious when Trip was flirty with Jemma. At least to him. Apparently he'd earned her trust when he'd turned out not to be a Hydra agent, but Fitz was already tense and angry at Trip, so he didn't really care whether or not Jemma thought he was to be trusted.

He fingered the trigger of his icer. Maybe he'd be able to do it. Whip the icer out and shoot Agent Triplett. Jemma, shy, nice Jemma, had shot an agent before. Of course, she hadn't thought and it was kind of an accident, and he doubted anyone would believe him shooting the man he despised (well, one of them) was an accident. What would Jemma think? What would Jemma do? Where would he end up? Jail probably, as S.H.I.E.L.D. had no control over anything anymore. He certainly wouldn't end up in the Fridge, that had been infiltrated. What if they did send him to the Fridge? Hydra would be after him for sure. John Garrett had said that they would use him, whether he cooperated or not. He'd never give in to Hydra, but if he shot Trip, than it wouldn't matter. Jemma would see him as as much of a traitor either way, and that's NOT what he wanted.

There was another option of course. He could take out his icer and aim it towards his skull. Give Jemma one last glance, and pull the trigger, embedding a bullet in the brain that had come up with the icer in the first place. He remembered when it was the Night Night gun. When there were threats but things still seemed...Together. When S.H.I.E.L.D. had been S.H.I.E.L.D. and not Hydra. He almost laughed, bitterly. The question again, was, What would Jemma think? If he killed himself with such a simple movement as pulling the trigger. What would his mom think? It had only been her. He'd been an only child, with a father who knows where, he'd never asked. He stole a glance at Jemma. He looked at Coulson. Jemma, was of course, priority. But other people would have reactions if he committed suicide. Maybe it would be better. Hydra is influential and these feeling of jealousy could do terrible things to him and those around him... He fingered the trigger again. He thought about the box. The box on a deserted island. What would he want in the box? Jemma of course but what if it had to be something else? What would he want in the box?

He'd want all his feelings, boxed up neat and orderly, not messed up and hard to work with. He'd want everything to make sense, to fit in a box instead of sprawled out everywhere with his emotions going haywire. He oculd typically fix things but not this! He couldn't do anything about this! He just wanted things to make sense... And if Trip was out of the picture, well he wouldn't argue with that. But he WAS NOT going to kill the guy. Or himself. He would keep his anger in check.

Well.

That's what he thought.

He thought he would be able to keep his anger in check.

Then he found out that the Bus was missing.

He wasn't going to be suicidal but then I ran out of stuff and all of last night I was thinking, what would he do? And I thought.

EMOTION.

So much emotion.

Flame if you wish. I'm about to watch the April 29th episode and cry because the last episode is around the corner.