okay i know it's been forever but i am back, yay! And what originally was going to be a tiny chapter ended up with me non stop writing for 3 days and ended up being almost 5000 words that i was going to split into two parts but i thought sod it here's the whole thing! Actually rather please with this one but again any OOC moments let me know and i do enjoy a nice review :)

Also i hope everyone is doing ok with the craziness going on currently and you are all staying safe. Now onwards with the teen angst!

"Why don't you take a seat and wait to talk to one of her parents, I'm now allowed to give that information out."

"look she's my…" God what was he meant to say…boyfriend? Was that coming on way too strong when they hadn't even had their first date yet? But the nurse didn't even let him finish.

"It doesn't matter. You're not family. I'm not allowed to tell you."

John wants to remark something snarky at the nurse, but he keeps his mouth shut as he turns back to the waiting area and takes a seat in one of the uncomfortable chairs. He couldn't feel more like an idiot f he tried. What was he thinking? Showing up here like they were actually going to tell him anything. He should have stayed at school and just gone to detention, but he remembers that sinking feeling in his stomach when Steph told him what happened, how much his gut had hurt thinking Janis wasn't ok. Sighing he slouches down into the chair. He hated it. He hated feeing fucking useless while she was probably dead.

God, what if she was dead? He's being stupid, it's not like he really liked her or anything, she was just some chick. John sighs and closes his eyes. She wasn't just some random girl though, because he really fucking liked this one. If this is what giving a shit about someone felt like it was exhausting.

"Mrs…. I'm sorry but can you please calm down."

John opens one eye to look at the nurse who had refused to help him as her voice echoes through the waiting room.

'Your daughter is fine, she's still in A&E as far as I'm aware. No, No Mrs Hunter I don't believe her results are back yet."

John snaps both eyes open.

"Mrs Hunter why don't I connect you to the ward and they can tell you how your daughter is doing?"

John is already on his feet, making his way past the nurses station while her back is turned and through the double doors. He knows the hospital well enough, this wasn't exactly his first visit, well, first one as a visitor instead of a patient. Burns, deep cuts, broken bones. There wasn't much he hadn't been at this hospital for. He was more than familiar with that feeling of being terrified in a hospital bed with no one there to look after him.

As he walks along the corridor trying to peek in through the closed curtains to find her, he couldn't feel more like a creep. If this didn't put him into the stalker category nothing would. He freezes when he finally catches sight of her through one of the curtains, she's laying on her side, blankets up around her, and what John could only assume as her dad sitting next to her, stroking her hair.

"Mr Hunter?"

John freezes and pretends to read the poster on the wall while listening to the nurse who is now speaking to Janis's dad.

"I'm sorry but your wife is on the phone and is insisting she talks to you."

John waits a moment for the large guy to emerge from the curtain and follow the nurse down the hall before finally making his way over. Janis is there, laying on her side in the bed, blankets pulled around her. For a moment he considers just leaving, why was he even here? This clearly wasn't a situation he should be involved in…. right?

"John?"

His eyes snap to her and she's looking at him, well he couldn't run away now.

"You know there's easier ways of getting out of a test? All you had to do was ask for advice." He says it as he takes a few steps towards her, the corner of her mouth smiles and he feels an ache in his chest.

"What are you doing here?" She asks with dry words.

"Seeing why you couldn't make it tonight. You look surprisingly healthy." That was a lie, she looked like she was on deaths door. Dark circles under her eyes, skin deadly pale. He can feel the worry grown inside him.

"Thanks. Believe me this was not what I pictured happening this evening." Her voice is horse and he's starting to wonder if she should be talking at all.

"Oh?" He takes a seat in the chair next to her bed. "Because this is exactly how I pictured it. Most of my evenings usually end up in an emergency room."

She gives him a sad smile and John's not sure what to say now. He didn't really know what he was expecting when he turned up there.

"At least at school they have something new to talk about now." He says, trying to lighten the mood.

"Vomiting blood does trump people saying you're a giant slut I guess." She half laughs and John tried not to let the worry cloud his face, but it doesn't work.

"You look concerned Mr Bender."

"I'm not allowed to be Miss Hunter?"

She smiles slightly. "Is that why you're here instead of detention?"

"Maybe." He smirks back.

Suddenly she's sitting up, attempting to grab the carboard bowl from the side, but John quickly hands it to her, just in time for her to vomit dark red blood into the tray as holds her hair back.

Bug was wrong, it wasn't gnarly, it was terrifying.

As John sees her dad enter, he can't help but take a step back and watch him take over, wiping the blood from his daughters' mouth. John's expecting him to start yelling, or at least go nuts to see someone who isn't family is there, instead he looks at him and simply says. "Son, go get a nurse for me, would ya?"

John doesn't question it as he runs out of the room to flag down the nearest nurse.

It had been god knows how long and John found himself out in one of the hallways, slumped in a chair. Shortly after the vomiting blood episode they had wheeled her away, her dad following after, and john had gone to wait in one of the hallways without a clue what was happening. As he stared at the clock, his eyes feeling heavy, he was trying to picture anything else but all he could think about was the dark red blood in the tray, the way it ran down her mouth... The way her dad had looked after her when it happened.

He tried to picture his dad doing that, actually giving a shit whenever John split his lip or ended up with a black eye, even though it was always his dad who had caused it in the first place. Jeez, Janis's dad had even called him son, he couldn't remember the last time those words had come of his dads mouth without having the words sack of shit in front of it.

"I had a feeling you would still be hanging around."

As John looks up, he finds himself sitting straighter, actually wanting to leave a good impression on her dad as he takes a seat next to him. For some reason in his mind he had imagined him short, nerdy, Mr Rogers maybe…but instead he was tall and muscular with a slight beard, the same eyes as her and thick brown hair, slightly greying.

John didn't know what to say. Talking to parents wasn't something he ever had to do, usually the most contact he had with them was when they were screaming at him to get out of their house after catching him with their daughter.

"Jan's out of surgery. She had a perforated ulcer…17 and her stomach had a hole in it from god damn stress."

He can hear the fear in her dads' voice as he talks, he can even hear the exhaustion.

"Did she say anything to you? About school…or..anything?"

John is replaying the conversation in his head from last night, and he's starting to wonder if he should have done anything then. But he's still not going to tell her dad that.

"No. She didn't."

Her dad nods as he stands up from the chair. "I need to get back to them. I thought I'd tell you she's ok…but she needs rest. And by the looks of it so do you."

"Thanks." Is all John can manage to mumble.

Her dad starts to walk down the hall but pauses for a moment before turning back. "Visiting times are 11-6, she's on Floor 3, Room 13..."

John doesn't say anything as he watches him go, he was still in shock that someone's dad was actively giving him instructions on when to go see their daughter. He waits for her dad to disappear down the hall before standing and heading in the opposite direction.

He knew the guys were heading to Al's Pizza that evening so he heads straight there, welcomed by quiet hellos and subtle glances as he sits himself down in the corner of the both, sitting in silence as he listen to them talk and eat pizza, despite the pain in his gut he didn't think he could stomach eating. He wished he had ignored Janis's dad's words and stayed at the hospital, but what good would that have done?

"so…are none of us going to discuss the fact the lovely Steph was going to take the SATS today?" Bug chimes up while sipping on his soda.

"That's fucked up dude." Ken murmurs through his mouth full of pizza. "What happened to the dream. Getting a van travelling around listening to zeppelin and the dead."

"that was the dream when Boham was still alive." She snap, it was still a sore subject. "and... you know…we're graduating next year and…."

"Yeah but you've been getting consistent D's for as long as I've known you…" Kev butts in.

Steph sighs. "well I was…being tutored. Mr Hashimoto suggested it."

"It's like we don't even know you." John jokes, finally speaking up for the first time and the others seem shocked that he finally made a sound. "Which lame-o did they get to tutor you."

"uh…that Brian guy." She shrugs.

"Johnson? What the King of the nerds?" Ken pipes up and him and Bug start to laugh. "Losers is in my shop class. That big brain of his can't even turn on a lamp."

John gets that sick feeling in his stomach, if only Ken knew.

"He was cool, actually." Steph shoots at them. John smiles slightly. He never thought he would hear one of his friends call Brian Johnson cool.

"It was him or uh…well I asked Janis, but she was tutoring like three different people."

"Did you hear anything when you went to the hospital man? she ok?" Bug asks with genuine concern. John nods, not really wanting to talk about it, still picturing the blood.

"I need more Pizza, also the girl in Booth three is checking me out." Bug smirks. "and she has a hot friend…"

Ken looks over and smirks as they stand from their booth. John watches for a moment as he sees them head over to the two girls before turning his attention to Steph. "Did you really think we'd be dicks about it?"

"I don't know man, since when have we given a shit about school? It's just…. I was talking to the guidance counsellor and…I don't want to end up like my mum is some job I hate; in a town I hate. And yeah, I know I'm not going to end up with a perfect score or anything I just wanted to see how it would go. Anyway, thanks to your girlfriend it's been pushed back till next week so there's that, so there's that."

"Good thing she almost died then." It came off snippier than he had wanted, but his friends were used to it.

"I didn't mean it like that. Although I did notice you didn't correct my girlfriend comment." She nudges him and John forces a small smile. "Besides, if I do fuck up, I can try again next year."

John slumps back in the seat, eyes wondering around the pizza place. His eyes focus on Bug and Kev who has settled down with the girls, laughing their asses off, and he starts to wonder what him and Janis would have been doing right now if the date had gone ahead.

"Dude when they get back we should go to Archie's and get stoned, or drunk, I'm not bothered about which."

"You just want to go stare at the hot bartender there." He mocks.

"Shut up."

John knows Steph is just trying to cheer him up but he's not really in the mood for it. He must be wearing his heart on his sleeve as he notices the sad look she gives him.

"I mean…she's ok though, right? The non-verbal response earlier wasn't that re-assuring."

"I guess." He mumbles. "I didn't get to see her…after…" As he looks over at he remembers when he had to go into hospital for his appendix surgery when he was fourteen, laying there awake all night, scared to be alone.

"After what?" She asks.

"You know uh, I'm going to head out. Shit I need to do."

John climbs out of the booth, feeling slightly bad that he's abandoning her while Bug and Ken have gone off but there was something else he needed to do.

He feels like an idiot as he enters the hospital, swinging the bag gently at his side. He's surprised when he walks in so easily, making his way up to the third floor. God what was he doing? It was late, she was probably asleep, the last thing she probably wanted was to see him.

As he looks through the glass to her room, he can see her sitting up in bed, flicking through the channels on tv. He knocks on the glass and gets a sudden sense of de ja vu when she looks over, one eyebrow slightly arched as she raises a hand and waves at him, he takes that as his que to enter.

"You do know visiting hours are over, right?" She says with a smile and pushes herself up. He can feel the relief wash over him just seeing her sat there, talking, just like her normal self. The colour has slightly come back to her face despite the fact she looks exhausted.

"Well uh, I had a feeling you would be up."

"Your Spidey sense was tingling huh?"

"Something like that."

He closes the door behind him as he enters the room, placing the bag on the table.

"I take it your parents won't just show up?"

"I faked sleeping and they went home. I didn't really want to have the how come you almost died talk."

"Yeah that one's a bummer." He drags the chair over to the side of her bed and takes a seat. "What we are watching?"

"Cheers."

He raises an eyebrow. "You almost died, at least put on something more interesting."

"There's like three channels. It was this or re-runs of Charlie's Angels. I was in a Ted Danson kind of mood."

"I always thought Cliff was the hot one personally."

She laughs a little, even though it sounds like it hurts to. "You know I'm uh…sorry you had to see me all ..exorcist.".

"You remember?"

"My dad mentioned it. To be honest I don't remember much after I puked blood on Vernon."

He sits up and leans forward. Steph and bug had neglected to tell him that part of it. "If that's true you're my new favourite person."

She smiles. "I was feeling…well, you know. So, I stuck my hand up and Vernon came over and I said to him I need to go to the nurse, and he was like whatever it is Hunter suck it up and finish, and then I proceeded to vomit on him. So that was good. I did ruin my favourite def leppard top though."

"Sacrifices needed to be made." He pauses for a moment, wanting to reach out and grabher hand. "How you feeling? You definitely look less death like."

"Uh…it hurts but…I'm ok. They've got me on an excellent cocktail of pain killer which is starting to wear off a bit but earlier I was having a great time." Janis sits up a bit more, wincing as she does so. "So, what's in the bag?"

It was dumb and felt like an idiot for it, but he gets up from his seat and pulls the boxes out of the bag. "Well I thought since you can't come on our date, I would bring the date to you."

"John Bender if you have brought me food I might have to marry you."

"Waffles, one with blueberries and the other is chocolate and peanut butter."

He remembered her saying Peanut and chocolate was the best combination in existence and by the smile on her face he had obviously done something right. "I think you're my new favourite person."

John smiles. "Oh, and uh, an eight pack. I did promise you a touch of class."

"You know, I won't take a beer as I'm fairly certain I can't have that with the number of drugs in my system, but I will happily take a waffle."

He passes her the waffle and takes a seat on the edge of her bed while picking at his, but she doesn't seem to mind.

"This is genuinely the best thing I've eaten all week. I thought you weren't a fan?"

"Well, maybe I was just trying to be a dick for no reason." He shrugs, remembering that first conversation in the diner that time and how he had been an asshole throughout the entire thing.

"So, is his what would of happened tonight?"

"well, less hospital surroundings were in mind. You have to start with food and small talk. Getting to know each other. That's what the kids do now days, right?"

"I have heard that's how it goes even though I distinctly remembering you saying small talk was pointless."

"Well, if we're going to do this date thing we might as well do it properly. But we need to set the mood first."

He stands from the bed and shrugs off his jacket, chucking it over the chair and pulling off the shirt he had over his t-shirt to cover the weird hospital lamp next to her bed, so the room now had a reddish glow.

"How's that?"

"Feels more serial killer dungeon but I'm into It."

She shuffles up on the bed slightly and pats the space next so he takes a seat next to her, their arms touch and he can feel the heat radiating from her.

"You know I don't think I've ever seen you in less than five layers?"

"Checking out the gun show huh?" He chuckles, before realising the scars on his arms from the years of parental abuse were probably on show, although hopefully with the mood lighting it wasn't so obvious. "Although I thought you were more into legs."

"That is true." She giggles lightly. "How about you?"

"Butt guy all day."

"That's good to know."

"So…small talk." He murmurs, trying not to focus on how they are both squished on the small bed together, reminding himself that she's just had major surgery and to stop being a perv. "So, you would probably ask…what's your favourite band and I would say Black Sabbath, and you would say Def leppard since I've seen you wear the stupid bands t-shirt more times than I can count."

"I'm surprised for band you didn't say Springsteen."

"well, he's technically a solo artist, unless you're including the e-street band in that."

She shoves his arm slightly "I knew you liked him!"

John grins slightly before continuing "Then I would ask what your favourite movie is, and you would say American Werewolf and I would say Mad Max."

"Then I would ask favourite ice cream flavour because mine is Cherry with sprinkles but I'm not a stalker like you are I wouldn't know what yours is."

He smirks. "Mint Chocolate. And I'm not a stalker…I just remember shit you tell me."

She smirks slightly. "So, after the small talk portion of the evening, what would we do then?"

"uh, well I would probably take you to 4th street arcade and show off my high score on Pacman."

"Pacman?" She exclaims. "Seriously?"

"I am shockingly good at it."

"What other secret talents do you have?"

He tried to search his brain for a half decent answer. Come on John you have to be good at something. "I can light a match with my teeth."

"Doesn't it hurt?"

"No. I can also do this." He pulls a quarter out of his jean pocket and turns slightly towards her, rolling it along his knuckles. "My grandpop showed me when I was a kid." He shrugged.

"Well I can eat ice-cream and slurries really fast, and never get brain freeze." She continues.

"If you give me a rubber band, I can hit any target or person with it. I once Hit Vernon right between the eyes." That one he was rather proud of.

She laughs and bites her lip, obviously trying to think of something else.

"Uh…. I can roll my tongue, See." As she demonstrates John can't help but smile.

"Well I can also open a beer bottle with my teeth."

"A lot of your special tricks involve your mouth."

"You have no idea." He says with a smirk and he's certain her cheeks are turning slightly pink, but she quickly changed the subject.

"So how did you get so good at pacman?" She asks.

He still rolling the quarter along his knuckles and she's now wrapped a hand around his bicep and is leaning against his arm. "I used to go after school and just play for hours, it was better than going home." He says it before he realises what's coming out of his mouth. He looks over to her and her eyes meet his and she gives him a gentle smile.

"And…was this really your first date? Well…would it have been?"

John sighs as settles into the bed a bit more. She hadn't complained about him taking up the space and he was enjoying being this close to her. "I've been on dates. I'm not a complete dweeb. We just never make it out of the car." He laughs, but she's not laughing back "Girls usually just want to do one thing that's all." He says with smirk. "Usually I'm more to piss off their parents than anything else. Also, I'm kind of a babe if you hadn't noticed."

"Yeah and you're far too aware of it." She laughs. He was pleased that she agreed.

"What about you?" John had to pry. She was definitely a virgin, no doubt about it, but the way she kissed him the other day, that was not a first kiss kind of thing.

"A few dates here and there." She shrugs. "Nothing special." He knew there was more she was hiding but he wasn't going to force that sort of information out. "but…I think this is my best one yet."

"That's just depressing. It may be the most depressing thing I've ever heard."

"Well I've never been on a date with someone I was excited to go out with." She shrugs and he feels his heart thump faster. It was strange having a girl admit that, and not for the usual reasons.

"It just sucks this is how it had to turn out I guess." She murmurs sadly. "This whole week has just been a lot…and last week with Blake was just…shit as well. And when I woke up earlier, my parents were just arguing about me so I pretend to be asleep because I just couldn't deal with it."

"I can't imagine your parents arguing about anything."

"Yeah…. well…. I think tomorrow I may get a moan at."

"It's not your fault your stomach decided to try and kill you."

"Well…I knew something was wrong…and I just chose to ignore it. When I woke up this morning I a hundred percent knew I was not ok…but I still went to school, I still went into the Exam. I didn't tell them anything."

John feels her grip tighten and he's certain he can see her wipe tears away.

"You know, when I was fourteen, I had my appendix out, and I told my folks for three days how much it hurt but they thought I was just trying to get out of school. Don't remember them actually doing anything until I passed out and the next thing I know I woke up in the hospital."

Suddenly she starts crying harder and he doesn't know what to do.

"Fuck. I was joking. My childhood was fantastic."

She sits up and starts wiping her eyes. "It's not that. Don't get me wrong that was super sad but that's not why…"

John doesn't know what to do or say.

"It's just…there's so much pressure. And it's not just my mom, it's everyone. The Teachers, it's all my friends talk about…even when I went to see my grandparents, they didn't talk about anything else. And I don't think anyone understands how much we kill ourselves and I don't even know if I'm doing it for something that I actually want or if it's just everyone telling me that's what I want."

John can't help but think of Brian, crying in the library, spilling his guts out to everyone. It wasn't something he could ever understand, but he still hated seeing her so upset.

"Everyone just expects so much of you. 'Do you want tutor people because it will look on your application?' Sure. 'Oh, do you want to tutor three people even though you have absolutely no time to?' Sure, why the fuck not! Studying before school, lunch, after school. I mean the only reason you were even allowed round was because my mum thought we were doing schoolwork. And when I tell her anything it's always how is that going to affect my college transcript. Like when I punched Blake, yeah, she was mad about the fact he touched me, but she was more upset about the detention that could ruin my perfect reputation. I mean can you imagine what she found out I went to that party, or I went out and got drunk and acted like a normal teenager for five minutes. She'd probably remove me from school, and home school me instead. I mean…god even when I wanted to get a job, she was so against it because it would take up time, I could be spending on schoolwork. She was also really pissed that I wanted to do yearbook instead of debate because it's not academic."

He doesn't know what to say or how to make her feel better. So, he sticks to what he knows best, sarcastic mockery.

"Either of those sound like a living hell. I'm honestly kind of disgusted you willingly joined yearbook."

He does hear a slight laugh through the tears, and he sits up so he's next to her now.

"I'm just…trying to make her happy…but It's making me miserable. I mean…Jesus I burned a hole through my stomach because of it."

'Well, your body has excellent timing."

He watches her as she hangs her head and wipes the tears from the cheeks. At least the crying has stopped and had settled down to the occasional sniff. But he still feels an ache in his chest as he looks at her, wishing he could do something to help her, although what could a burnout like him do to help a brain like her. So, quietly he slips his hand next to her, entwining their fingers together. As much as he wanted to, he didn't think he should go in for a kiss right then, her eyes burnt and red with flushed cheeks. Instead he moves closer to her and places kiss a places on the side of forehead. In all honesty it was probably the gentlest thing he had done with a person, and there was absolutely no hidden motive behind it.

"I promise not to tell anyone that you're actually kind of a sweetheart." Janis says quietly and he smiles.

"I would really appreciate that. Can't have people not fearing me, it would ruin the reputation I spent years building up." He says with a note of sarcasm and she smiles slightly.

He feels her settled into his side, leaning her head against his shoulder and he loosens the grasp he has on her hand and wraps an arm around her instead.

John couldn't believe it. He was falling for a nerd.