Warning: This story is rated M for violence and adult situations.

Summary: Natasha is still trying to come to terms with having to fight off the Winter Soldier, her former mentor from the Red Room, who almost killed her. She has to deal with severe PTSD involving him from her past. The Winter Soldier is drawn to her, despite not knowing why at first. He is still a ruthless, cold killer with a plan in mind. The story follows their reconnecting and and rekindling of their former relationship.

Contains the universe of CA:TWS and some comic book elements of Natasha's and Winter Soldier's past and lot of the author's imagination. There might be some canon errors, but I wasn't all up to speed on their comic history.

Another disclaimer/warning: I write Black Widow rather vulnerable and Winter Soldier dominating.

Hope you enjoy!

23:11 - Avalon Apartment Building, Washington, D.C.

She caught her reflection on the highly polished marble wall of the elevator. She noted without a surprise just how tired her eyes looked, even with all that makeup on. Sleep had been eluding her the past few weeks, and it was starting to show, physically and emotionally. The massive SHIELD downfall and its consequences had been extremely taxing on her. She was getting used to seeing empty eyes and hollowed cheeks looking back at her from the mirrors.

At times, she felt like she entered a catatonic state of mind. Mindlessly walking, doing menial tasks, anything to keep her distracted.

She was trying her hardest to not think about the day that SHIELD crumbled and all the chaos and deaths it had caused.

Caused by him.

She took a deep breath and looked at the other girls in the humming elevator, zipping up the high rise building. They were chatting excitedly amongst each other. Ignorance can be a bliss sometimes, she thought with a tinge of envy.

Her face had been frozen in a polite smile, it went with the outfit she was wearing. Her blonde curls were falling softly over her naked shoulders and the extremely short dress was hugging her curves. It didn't leave much to anyone's imagination.

Her hand went to her mouth to suppress a yawn.

She arched her back slightly, to perk out her cleavage even more. That's where she wanted to draw attention, away from her face. The other four girls burst out into loud giggling over something that she had missed. Natasha laughed with them.

All of them were young, good looking, flirty. Dressed like they were about to go out into an expensive, high class nightclub. These naive girls had no idea who this man they were about to meet, really was, she thought with pity.

With a ding the elevator got to a stop, top floor. All five of them stepped out into an open, bright and lavishly furnished hallway. Intricate gold-leaved stucco ran along the walls and heavy chandeliers shone down on them from 15 foot ceilings. She felt the excitement of the other four girls at the sight of this.

Time to put on a show. Natasha was starting to feel excited herself.

"Hey, tell the boss the girls are here!" She heard a male voice yell. Two bulky and tough looking bodyguards greeted them. They were keeping their hands discreetly near their holstered guns, hidden under their black suit jackets, she observed. "Right along here, ladies."

She put on a saccharine smile as she followed the group. Ornate columns flanked the corners of the halls, with smaller hallways leading in different directions. The marbled floor echoed under the clicking of their high heels.

000

She had put herself onto an invitation to one of the biggest penthouses in Downtown Washington D.C. and, of course, it would belong to a scumbag with strong HYDRA connections. He had somehow gone undiscovered yet in the huge file leak, three weeks ago. But she was about to change that.

The giant SHIELD meltdown and the subsequent destruction of their HQ was still very fresh in her mind. Natasha had not expected, and definitely not wanted, to go on any mission that soon, especially after all her covers had been blown. But Nick had insisted, and he could be good at that.

She was about to follow the other girls into one of the rooms, when one of the security guards grabbed her arm. He pulled her close and put his mouth on her ear, feeling his hot breath "When the boss is done with you, you should come party with me for a little bit. I can give you an even better time" His hand was on her butt, squeezing.

It took Natasha all her willpower, but she just looked at him with big eyes. "Oh baby," she whispered back in her raspy voice. "I can't wait." her lips were pressed into a tight smile.

He gave her one more squeeze, then grinned stupidly at her and let her go.

She went through the main doors, where the girls had vanished into the dim room. It was a huge, furnished purely for entertainment. Music was playing in the background and she made out several big sectionals, a bar and pool tables among an exotic interior, complete with potted palm trees and a huge fake waterfall on the back wall. A bartender was working the bar and she took note of three security guards in different corners of the room. The girls were already swarming around the big guy, Aleksandrov, and two of his business friends. He looked fat and puffy, sitting on the couch, sweat running down his face, as he was throwing two girls at once on his lap. Vodka had been flowing freely already. That will make it easier.

She mingled for a little bit, making idle conversation with him and his partners. Aleksandrov was loud and vulgar. She was feigning interest in what he had to say, posing only as a pretty face that was overcome with awe at his incredible wealth. But she subtly kept her distance and let the other girls distract these russian billionaire playboys. About 45 minutes in, she finally noticed the security men relax slightly, even taking shots of vodka when the boss wasn't looking.

Aleksandrov had a blonde on his lap and was fully engulfed in her, with his hands all over her body. Natasha decided to excuse herself to the bathroom, but nobody was paying attention to her. She walked out in the hallway and slid along the walls.

"I'm in, do you copy?" She whispered. The tiny bug in her ear came to life. "Copy. I got your location. The access terminal should be two rooms down and on your right." Murry, the SHIELD agent on the other end informed her.

She made her way towards that door. Looking over her shoulder, she twisted the door knob and stepped into the dark room.

"Hey, what the fuck... who are you?" An angry male voice greeted her.

She hadn't expected anyone to be in here, but now she had to deal with him.

"Oh, I was just looking for the bathroom." An innocent look on her face. She let her vision adjust to the dim light, and noticed several laptops on desks along the wall. Bingo.

The angry guy had jumped up from his chair and was coming towards her, hand on his gun. "Get the fuck ou-" She kicked him square in the throat and he dropped like a dead weight. There was a second guy sitting on one of the tables to her right. He had just started to process what was happening, when she was on him, slipping a knife in his neck. She felt it slice along his spinal cord, severing the nerves. He was dead before he could make a sound. "Amateurs" she murmured, without pity, as she grabbed a chair and pulled up to one of the laptops.

Her ear bug crackled. "You have two minutes from the time you start the extraction, anything beyond two and HYDRA will be able to track you." the SHIELD agent on the other end reminded her.

"Here we go then."

For some reason, this fat bastard was in possession of critical HYDRA files. She didn't know why, Fury hadn't told her. She was only tasked with extracting them.

She used one of her hacks to get access to the database, the first chunk was easily decrypted. She started copying everything on a tiny USB stick, which she had smuggled in on her dress, her hands typing on the keyboard as file names were flashing in front of her.

The progress bar filled up fast, then slowed and stopped at 93%. There were two files that had an extra level of security, she noticed with growing concern.

"Dammit." Her hands were flying now. The order she had been given, was to copy absolutely everything.

"60 seconds, Romanov"

"Yeah, hold on." She tried a few different algorithms, nothing.

"Why the hell is it not working.." she mumbled to herself.

She tried it from a different angle, running a self inserting hack, that would open her a backdoor. She glanced at her watch. A trickle of sweat began to appear on her forehead.

Then, finally the hack found a match and it cracked the file open. It started copying

"15 seconds, you have to wrap things up."

The transfer was going slow, her eyes darting from her watch to the progress bar.

"Five seconds, shut it down now!" The file name 'Project 00012464 W.S.' flashed up on her screen for a split second and then it was done.

"Got it."

"You cut it close, they possibly got your location. Be on guard." Agent Murry's voice. Natasha got up and snug back into the hallway. The bodyguard from earlier was just rounding the corner, tugging his shirt in, and saw her.

"Hey, there you are!" He half walked and stumbled towards her, grinning. "Hot little thing. Come here." She could smell Vodka on him as he grabbed her, shoving her into the wall. He leaned in and his hands went exploring up her dress. Natasha let him, then threw her arms around his neck. Her lips brushed next to his ear.

"I've got something special for you." She whispered.

His smile froze. She withdrew her arms and he clasped his hands on the back of his neck, eyes wide in shock. As he fell to his knees, she stepped lightly around him, pulling the knife out of his spinal cord. She turned back around and removed the gun from his corpse as well, before sprinting to the elevator.

She pressed the button for the lobby. The doors were closing endlessly slow. A commotion had started in the hallway, footsteps coming her way. She shot the first guy she saw before the elevator closed for good.

Her heart was beating fast. They had been alerted. She inspected the rounds left in the gun, it was fully loaded.

Why had she agreed to this in the first place, she sighed, pulling the blonde wig from her head. "I'm in the elevator." she said out loud and kicked off her high heels.

"We spotted some activity around the front entrance. Try and leave through the back, we'll have an armored car waiting for you." the voice in her ear.

She halted the elevator on the 10th floor and ran down the flight of stairs for the rest. The door on the bottom opened to an empty wing of the lobby. She carefully looked around before leaving the staircase, then ran along the walls, following the exit signs. Just a few more turns ahead.

Someone grabbed her by the arm and swung her around

"I got the bitch! Over here" a voice yelled out to his partner. In one swift motion, Natasha kicked him between the legs and used him as a meat shield. The second guard rounded the corner, shooting, she shot him first, then sent a bullet into the guy in front of her.

Almost there. She was running barefoot through the last stretch of the hallway. Finally, the emergency exit door came into her view, when the wall near her head exploded. Something hot grazed the side of her thigh. She flew behind a door frame for cover, as more bullets were hitting the walls and floor around her.

"Backup is on the way, keep down!" the agent yelled in her ear.

HYDRA members were swarming out from the main lobby, towards her location. She aimed her gun at them and shot twice, hitting one of them. She waited, listening for their footsteps. There were at least three. When the first guy came into her field of vision, she slid out in front him, hit his legs and took him down, then finished him off with her last bullet. She ripped the automatic rifle from his dying hands and started shooting towards the others, who were now ducking for cover.

The exit door behind her exploded, Natasha whirled around. SHIELD agents streamed in. Chaos enfolded, gunshots and screams made her ears ring. They kept yelling at her to get out, which she finally complied with, after the noise had died down and dead HYDRA members were scattering the floors.

She made her way out of the smoldering exit and walked towards one of the black vans parked just outside.

The sliding door opened.

Agent Maria Hill stuck her head out, the look on her face livid. "What the hell happened in there, Romanov." Maria was fuming. "I did not expect this to end in a disaster!"

Natasha grunted as she jumped in.

Maria barked at her as she slid the door shut. "Did you at least get the file, before you went on your little killing spree?"

Natasha had never seen her that angry, she only knew her as the self composed, rational thinking, right-hand of Fury. Maybe everyone had been on the edge too much the last weeks and it was finally boiling over.

Maria kept pressuring her. "Had I not made clear that I didn't want to involve my team in your mission? You forced me to risk their lives."

"I got the file, Agent Hill. And I can hold my own, I didn't need your help." Natasha snapped back, annoyed herself now.

"We'll take the USB stick from here." Maria snatched it from her hands. She mustered Natasha up and down, examining. "You are bleeding. I'll have you transported to a safe E.R. Nick will have to wait on your report"

Natasha leaned back into her seat and closed her eyes.