I Dare Not Hope: Chapter 21

The plan was simple, find Bell, get him to reveal where John was, and then end him once and for all.

Simple, or so it seemed. But Margaret knew it wasn't all black and white.

Bell would never tell them anything, especially her. No matter how much pain she would try to force on his being. No matter how many witches' spells she could cast upon him. He would never falter. She knew he had come too far to just give up. He would never release either of them. Not while they were still determined to be together.

She feared of course that she was no match for Bell, but she would try, for John she would walk straight into Hell. She knew that for sure. Her heart above all else would be Bell's main target, Margaret wondered if it would come to that, for either one of them to sacrifice one another would be the last possible outcome. If it came to that, she would perish into flames for John Thornton, demon or not.

When the plan was laid out and everyone knew their part, though none was happy about the whole thing, they made their final preparations. The night before Margaret, Fred, and their Aunt were to depart to Milton, Edith, Mrs. Thornton and Fanny were leaving that moment to go to Germany. Henry had gone ahead of them to meet with his correspondence to find out exactly where Bell was hiding Thornton. Margaret wanted so badly to go with them. If she ever found John alive and well she would run away with him and hide from Bell forever. But they would always be hiding. She knew he would never stop tormenting them. So, she stuck with the plan.

Fanny and Edith were all tears as they said their goodbyes to Margaret. Reluctantly they piled into the carriage for their long journey to Germany. Mrs. Thornton did not hug Margaret or shed a tear. She kept her stern eyes focused and hard and leaned closer to Margaret, and told her fiercely, "Kill him. Make him suffer."

Margaret could see the twitch of Mrs. Thornton's mouth as she controlled her emotions from turning into a gleeful smile at the thought of Bell's torment. Margaret figured that was as good as a blessing she would ever get from her. Margaret smiled in return and promised, "I will." In that moment Margaret knew she could do it. Mrs. Thornton stepped into the carriage and as the door shut Margaret grabbed her arm through the window. "Tell him I'm coming, even if he doesn't know me. Tell him." Mrs. Thornton nodded once and the carriage took off.

Margaret stood looking over the horizon as the carriage faded out of sight. Her mind was eased a little with the thought that John would be looked after by his family if he was found. When! When he is found!

As the night took over the manor and the house was almost empty Margaret became restless just waiting and doing nothing. Fred and her aunt were in the parlor talking in hushed voices. Margaret could hear laughter a few times and longed to go and see what they were talking about. But her guilt over being in his house safe with her family without him made her seek solitude in her room.

She walked back and forth from her window to her vanity as she thought over what would happen and what could possibly happen when she arrived in Milton. She knew she could lose everything. Her family, John's family, Bell could take everything and make her witness it all. She wouldn't let him. These thoughts alone were of his making and his doing. He wanted her to doubt and to be afraid.

She cried out in frustration. She couldn't even remember John as he used to be, she repeatedly played over their last meeting in her mind. His cold hard eyes and the way he threatened her. It wasn't him, she reminded herself. It's not him.

She heard her Aunt and Fred stirring downstairs. Eventually Fred came to her room to wish her goodnight. Knowing how she was he did not want to disturb her and her thoughts.

"Goodnight Margaret. I will come wake you in the morning." He said through the half open door.

"I don't think I will sleep tonight, Fred."

"I don't think any of us will sleep until this whole matter is over. But just try." He said with sympathy, knowing full well that Margaret more than anyone else would never rest until it was over.

"Goodnight Fred." She offered him half a smile but it fell almost immediately. He closed the door to leave her to herself.

Margaret stood for another moment, trying to get her thoughts together. Her Aunt had taught her a trick that when she was feeling overwhelmed or unsure of herself, to steady herself, breathe deeply and to picture herself doing so. Eventually she would leave her body, free of thoughts and fears and be able to look in on herself.

Margaret had accomplished this only a few times, because it came with a warning from her Aunt that once she was no longer one with her body that was when she was most vulnerable.

Margaret knew it was risky but she had to free herself from her thoughts if only just for a moment. Maybe then she could catch a glimpse of John, see if he was alright. She promised him she would not invade his thoughts and she couldn't risk losing that trust now, if she had it at all, but she would not let him see her.

She stood still and breathed the cool sea air deeply in her lungs. She could feel the prickle of the humid salty air as it stuck to her skin. The crash of the waves from far off faded slowly in her ears as the beating of her heart became heavier in her ears. She felt a tingle in her toes and her fingertips until she felt nothing at all. She felt herself rise from the ground without the weight of her own body.

When she finally opened her eyes after a few more calming breaths she looked down at herself. From the corner of the room she could see herself standing, breathing heavily, her face calm and tranquil.

From her view of herself Margaret could keep watch over her form as she disentangled herself from her worries and fears. She closed her eyes again with a soft sigh, when the loud bang of her door swinging open startled her from her peace. All at once her thoughts and fears came storming back to her. Panic rose in her as she tried to get back to herself but she couldn't move. Her body was immobile, still breathing as she struggled to get back.

What is this? This has never happened before!

As she fought with her invisible bonds, she felt it then. His presence was overwhelming and he was close. She fought even harder now knowing what the threat was.

How did he find us?!

Margaret struggled for what felt like an age as she sensed him come even nearer. Then she had an idea, she couldn't get back to herself, but she could try to will her body back to her.

She focused on herself from across the room and miraculously her body started to move closer to her. She had to wait for the right moment that she could let everything go and just let herself fall back into herself. Just in time as the door creaked open wider Margaret let herself plummet down connecting back with herself and falling into a crumbled heap on the floor. She gasped for breath as she became familiar with her form again.

Just as she looked up, Bell was standing right in front of her.

"That was impressive my dear Margaret. I can't wait to see what else you have up your sleeve." He held a hand out to her to help her up. She crawled away and stood up on her own.

He chuckled as she didn't take her eyes off of him.

After a silence Bell asked mockingly, "You're not even the slightest bit curious how I found you?"

Margaret said nothing. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction. As terrified as she was she wouldn't let it show.

"Well, you'll spoil my fun if I don't tell you." He paused for dramatic emphasis. "It was John, and all I did was ask nicely."

"You tortured him. It's not really him."She spat at him, disbelief in her eyes.

"He is what he was always meant to be. His time was fast approaching anyways. But then he met this strong headed, willful girl, and it ruined all of my plans for him." He emphasized his words while looking straight at her. As if she wouldn't realize he was talking about her.

"I'm sorry. It was not my intention."She could have laughed for apologizing, but couldn't manage it. He would know she didn't mean it anyways.

"See, it's that right there that makes me understand why he fell under your spell. Your mother did it to me and now you are doing it to him. I had to break him from this, "He waved his hand around, vaguely, "love spell."

"I used no such thing. You know full well I had no knowledge of my power."

"Didn't you? You may have not used a spell, but your feminine ways always seem to turn the coldest hearted of men into simpering whelps."

"It seems my mother was not successful in changing your heart." Margaret said.

"That is because I do not have one."

"I believe that."

"That was always the problem with Thornton, a part of him would always be human. And you just managed to make him feel that again. He could have been great. Aren't you going to ask me about him? How I turned him." Bell smiled excitedly.

"You know I would never ask even if it was the only thing I would ever ask of you."

"But you are dying to know, aren't you?"

Margaret turned her head, knowing he already knew the answer. He knew just the right way to torment her.

"I simply made him believe that everything he ever felt for you was a lie. You are a just another witch attempting to torment another demon. I told him every moment he thought of you was a trick cast upon him by you."

Margaret didn't want to hear anymore, but Bell continued on seeing the pain this gave Margaret.

"See, that is what is so simple about humans, always willing to believe the lies they are told. He believed it alright and the demon is once again alive and well in John Thornton. I'd like to see you try to make him love you again, with or without a spell."

"Whether he loves me or not, I will still kill you." She promised.

"Yes, I'm counting on that. I do admire you for it but it's time we draw this to a close. The real reason I came here was to give you a choice. That's not something I do often."

"I don't want to hear it." She turned from him, not being able to stand the sight of him.

"You will hear it, because once I've made a decision I always follow through to see it played out."He said more sternly without his mockingly jovial tone.

"Well? What are my choices that you have so obligingly given me?" Margaret couldn't help the sarcasm that seemed to pour out of her when she was around Bell. Maybe it was his gentlemanly façade that made her want to laugh at him. She knew no amount of disguise or tricks could fool her.

"You can do what you came to do, which is try and destroy me and save your precious demon or you can join me and be with him forever." He said simply, like he was asking her to accompany him to a ball the next evening.

"You planned this all along."He must have, he must have known all along this would happen. All these years he waited for the right moment because he already knew.

"No, but I wish I had. So what do you say?"

"You really believe I would join you." The doubt could be heard loud and clear in her voice.

"Yes Margaret. I would give you everything. I would give you John back."

Margaret perked up at that. And she hated that she would let herself falter in his presence.

"Ah see, human nature, even you are a prisoner to your humanity. Think of it Margaret, you and John finally together, doing as you please…"

"Doing your bidding. Being your slaves." She was no fool. Any ultimatum he gave her would come with a price.

"Well yes there's always a catch."

"What about my family, his family?" It occurred to her then that they could be in danger this moment. If he knew where they were all along, surely he would know of their plan too?

"Not my problem. I have no need to harm them."

"Only to use them against us when you so choose."

"No. If need be I will use our children for that."

Margaret for once could not form a single thought to that comment. Until the weight of what he was saying embedded itself into her mind. Mr. Bell smiled as the color washed away from Margaret's face.

"You did not say… but, how can we…?" She struggled for her thoughts and Mr. Bell witnessed what it was like to break a powerful witch. He would never admit how delighted it made him feel.

"I said you and John would be together, but you and I Margaret we would be joined together."He said with joy. Finally after all his patience, what he had always wanted would soon be his, if he could just get her to agree with his plan.

"I will never give you anything."She said, horrified.

"You will Margaret because that is what I want. I always get what I want. Your mother denied it from me so I will take it from you. Our children will be unstoppable."

Margaret couldn't believe this was happening. Could she sacrifice herself just so she and John could be together? They would never truly be happy. And the thought of Bell fathering her children, for her to have to…no, she wouldn't think of it.

"What do you say, Margaret?"

She wouldn't do it. Even as much as she loved John, she couldn't.

"I want to see him first. I want you to make him as he was. No more hatred or lies."

"I will not do that. It is not a part of my bargain."

"Then the answer is no."

"Are you telling me you will accept my offer if you can just see him?"Mr. Bell was curious to this change.

"And you change him back."She added, she won't be fooled into this without the assurance of John's safety.

He seemed to think about her answer, as he looked her in her eyes to see the desperate need to see John again. If he could get what he wanted by bending even the slightest then he supposed he didn't come all this way to let the opportunity slip through his fingers.

"Very well, I accept if you will shake on it, Margaret."

He held his white sickly hand out to her as she hesitantly took his lifeless hand in her own.

Did she just seal her and John's fate?

"If we leave now, we can catch the train back to Milton."

She pulled her hand back. "But you said you'd take me to John."

"He is in Milton."

"But, we thought he was in Germany."

"That is exactly what I wanted you all to think."

"I don't trust you and if at any moment I feel that you will cause any harm to John, I will kill you."

"I'd be disappointed if you didn't try."

Margaret didn't like the thought of leaving her Aunt and her brother without telling them where she was going, or whom with, but they would stop her and Bell wouldn't have allowed her in the first place. She realized she always knew it would just be down to her. It was her fate and John's that were always intertwined with Bell. In a morbid sort of way, Bell was the one that brought them together.

Strange how everything turned out, Margaret mused.

Mr. Bell had no shame in freely touching Margaret intimately and in public display of everyone as they made their way to the train station. At Margaret's first protest he had reasoned with her that they must look the part so as to not give themselves away.

"Wouldn't it be better to charade as father and daughter, surely that is more believable?"

Margaret received a cold bruising squeeze to her waist for that comment. But Mr. Bell gritted his teeth and smiled as "not to give away anything."

Once they were settled on the train, it took no time for them start their departure as the train moved, Mr. Bell closed their compartment door to make sure no one else sat with them. Margaret instinctively was looking for ways to escape just in case he was taking her on a wild goose chase to somewhere even further from John. Her darting eyes alerted him to her thoughts.

"I wouldn't think about it, Margaret. There is no place for you to go…unless you jump." He laughed. "Don't worry, I'll keep my end of the bargain."

Instead of giving him a snarky reply, she turned her head towards the window. The summer sky was overcast with thick white clouds. She watched them rumble across the passing sky as she mentally counted the seconds she had to spend in the small space with Bell. Before the day is over you will see him again, she assured herself.

Hours passed in silence in the cramped space between witch and demon. Margaret hoped he would leave the cabin if only for a few moments to give her some reprieve. She knew he didn't trust her just as she didn't trust him. To be fair she wouldn't rust herself alone either.

After what felt like ages, the train slowed to pull into a station. Margaret perked up that they might finally be in Milton.

"It's just a stop, Margaret. We have another few hours."

She sank back in her chair. "Where are we?"

He hesitated as he pretended to read his paper, "Helstone."

"Helstone." She whispered. How could she not recognize it?

A knock on the door startled them both. Mr. Bell sprang from his seat to open the door to reveal a server with a tray of tea and food.

"Yes, what is it?" Bell snapped at the man.

The man looked taken back at his reaction. "Tea for you or the missus? Or will you be departing at Helstone?"

Margaret turned back to the window looking over the green fields of her forgotten home, ignoring the interaction between Bell and the server.

"You must be famished, Margaret." He looked to her as he told the server. "We will take the tea."

"Are you alright Miss?" The man asked, noticing how strange the interaction between them was.

"She's fine. We wish to not be disturbed anymore." Once the tray was set, Bell shut the door in the concerned server's face.

"Don't look too forlorn, Margaret. I'll take you back to Helstone one day."

"I don't wish to go back, least of all with you." She said, trying to avoid his gaze. She couldn't help but catch the delight on his face caused by something she said, he seemed all too joyous all of a sudden and it sent Margaret's mind racing. She knew something wasn't right. Her fingers prickled and her hair seemed to stand on end. Her body was telling her something her mind could not.

"Of course I will bring John too and our children. I will want them to see where their mother was raised, where she played as a child."

Margaret couldn't help but cover her mouth as she felt her stomach heave with the vivid picture that Bell described to her of what her future would be like. Bell quickly offered her a handkerchief, she pushed his hand away. It made her want to laugh at the whole absurdity of his concerned gesture.

"You'll get used to the idea, Margaret." He relished in her reaction.

She shook away the feeling of her unsettled stomach as she tried to catch her breath. He was distracting her. What from?

"How long will it be to Milton?" She tried to compose herself.

"Not very long now." He picked up his paper again.

"Where is he now?" She asked as the train jolted, signaling that they were moving again.

"He is safe."

"In Milton?" She looked at him then to see how he would answer her.

His gaze faltered from the paper until he looked at her with a suspicious look on his face. He turned the page of the paper while matching her penetrating gaze. When he looked back down he answered, "Yes, he is safe in Milton."

Margaret knew, she didn't know how exactly, but she knew he was lying. He wanted so badly to keep her on the train. Why? Why would he try to keep her on the train when they weren't even near their destination yet?

Margaret looked out the window once again as it came to her, the truth. As Helstone was passing them by slowly, she knew, John is here.

Margaret turned her view from the window to focus on the tea tray in front of her. She gently reached for the pot to pour some tea in the cup. The hot amber poured into the white porcelain as the steam rose between Margaret and Bell. She stilled her breathing and tried not to let her hands shake as she poured tea for two, but made sure to keep enough of the scalding tea in the pot.

"I take two sugars, Margaret." Bell said, still looking at his paper.

Before he could even finish the sentence, Margaret swung the pot right into Mr. Bell's face. The porcelain breaking into pieces as the hot tea burned flesh, the steam flourished around him. He screamed and fell forward as Margaret made for the door. She stepped over him and pushed the sliding door open and ran down the narrow hall as Bell's screams turned into protests and angry threats.

Margaret ran, thankful there was no one in her way. She didn't look back in case he had run after her. It was only a matter of time before her would so she acted fast.

The commotion alerted many of the other passengers and servers as they crowded the halls behind Margaret.

She came to the end of the train car and saw her escape. The landscape was quickly moving past her as green fields turned into smudges in her vision and she knew she couldn't hesitate a moment longer before it would be too late. She pulled the door open and the wind blew her back for a moment. Without another thought she jumped from the car, flying through the air until she felt the shock of landing on solid ground and tumbling down the hill. She looked back at the train that had picked up speed and saw no sign of Bell.

Once the train was far enough away she climbed back up the hill and over the train tracks. She ran through the field towards Helstone. If she kept a steady pace she could be there in minutes. She knew the fastest ways to cut through streams and farms to get home faster. Her legs kept moving even as her lungs protested. She didn't look back, not willing to think that Bell was already after her. She just needed time and she could get to John.

She ran over a steep hill and saw the lonely brick house, covered in vines and rose bushes, never had anything looked so grand to Margaret. She ran faster towards the abandoned house hoping that John was inside and safe. She didn't even think of what he would do if he saw her again. She didn't care. She was so close.

She ran up the steps her father had built when she was a baby, passed the rose bushes her mother had tended to as long as she had lived in the house and finally came to the door that was chipped and weather worn. The door creaked and protested as she opened it slowly. She walked through the hall to the parlor where in the middle of the room lay a heap of what Margaret realized was the form of a man.

"John!" She screamed as she moved closer to him and kneeled next to him on the floor. He was in his trousers and shirt but nothing else, no shoes, socks, cravat, jacket anything. His hair was tangled and oily and he had an unkempt beard. Margaret was horrified at how pale and sickly he was, even more so then when she saw him last. She turned him over so he was leaning against her legs. "John?"

He moaned as he struggled to open his sunken eyes. When he did open them he was immediately horrified. "Margaret? No, you can't be here! He promised me!"

"He lied to both of us. Are you alright?" She held him closer amazed that he wasn't trying to rip her apart.

"I was going to be, when he promised me he would leave you alone." He held her hand as she stroked his bruised face. "I'm sorry, Margaret, for hurting you. If I didn't, you would have come after me. I never meant to hurt you. Did you believe me?"

"I did. Oh John, nothing would have kept me from coming after you even if you didn't want me anymore."

"I was afraid of that. So Bell's plan didn't work?"

"I don't think he's too happy right now."

"Good." He chuckled and started a coughing fit that concerned Margaret.

She assessed his condition and wondered how badly he was hurt. "John, we can't stay here. We have to move."

"I know, but I don't think I can." He winced as he tried to sit up.

Margaret gently stood up while keeping his upper body upright. "Can you try and stand on your legs?"

He did, a bit shakily, but once he leaned his weight onto Margaret they both held each other close. He couldn't help looking at her as he brushed her hair from her face. He smiled down at her, "I have the protection spell you gave me."

"I wondered why it didn't work."

"It did, Margaret. More then you'll ever know. I always kept it close." He brought her hand to his chest where she felt the tiny vile hanging from his neck through his thin shirt.

The wind picked up outside and the skies darkened. The walls around them creaked and groaned as Margaret's senses were awakening again.

"We have to go, now."

They started to move towards the door as a voice echoed through the hall into the parlor.

"I've let you get away once I'm not doing it again." Bell rounded the corner, disheveled and bleeding from the burns on his face. The hate in his eyes was reserved for Margaret and she could see murder in them.

"You did that?" John asked surprised.

"Not now, John." Margaret huffed.

"Yes, she did. Your little witch has pushed me too far." Bell stepped closer to them as the air became thicker and warmer around them. Sweat had started to pour off Margaret's brow as her breathing became labored.

"Bell let her go. You can do what you want with me."

"I'm done with all that." With a flick of his wrist, Bell had thrown John from under Margaret's hold across the room. He fell with a hard shock to the floor as Margaret was left facing Mr. Bell alone.

"I'll take you with or without your comply. You will be mine. There will be no more fighting, no more games, or conditions. I'm taking you now." Bell grabbed hold of Margaret's arm dragging her to the door to leave John behind.

Margaret focused on her hand, conjuring a spell that hopefully would leave Bell in painful agony. Once her hand was engulfed in surging purple flame she focused the energy when her palm made contact with Bell's back. He cried out as he fell to the floor, writhing where he fell.

Margaret turned to go back to John, where he lay lifeless on the floor, his chest rising slowly with harsh, grating breaths.

She turned back to where she left Bell, but he was gone. But she knew he wasn't far. She stood slowly not leaving John's side. Readying herself for another attack she looked around her in anticipation, another spell surging through her, ready to be used.

But she didn't see it coming. She was knocked on her back, the wind knocked out of her, lying next to John. When she looked up, what she saw truly terrified her. In the place of Mr. Bell was a demon, the demon that had inhabited Bell's body for centuries. Just like in the books Margaret had read those few months ago, here was a living, breathing demon, but still unmistakably Bell. His face and form but underneath were the flames of Hell, the torment of living for years as an unearthly being behind cold blue eyes.

Margaret tried to move but was stopped as he held her face with cold hands with nails as sharp as a knife.

"Move and he dies."

She stayed still as he forced her to stand up while pulling at her face, bringing her even closer to him. She could smell the foul, rancid breath as his voice washed over her.

"Finally, the Beresford family will pay for what they did all those years ago. Our children will be your ultimate betrayal to them. But first, I end him. My biggest regret will always be that I couldn't make him suffer as he watched me take the life from the witch he loved."

With a spindly hand, he reached for John where he lay but before he could do anything the demon looked to Margaret to see her holding his heart in her palm. The surprise and anger that washed over him made his hold falter as he let her go.

He staggered back still in shock at this un expected turnout.

He looked down at his hollow chest as his demon form started to turn back to Bell's. He fell to his knees, feeling the warm gush of blood as it rushed from his body.

"How?" He whispered, as he spit blood from his human mouth.

"They created you and gave you a heart. I'm taking it back." Margaret conjured a flame in her palm holding his heart as the organ burst and crackled into a flame.

Bell fell forward the life going out of him. Margaret stood with the flaming heart looking over the body of her godfather. Not until the body started to turn to ash and bone did Margaret release the heart into a kettle over the fireplace, letting it turn to nothing more than ash.

Margaret rushed to John's side finding him already starting to move. He sat up as she embraced him tightly to her.

"Is it over?"

"Yes, it's over. He's gone." She burrowed herself closer into his shoulder as she sat next to him on the floor.

"I'm still here." He said.

"Yes, you're alright." Margaret smiled finally looking at him to see him wondering about something she couldn't understand.

"I thought," He started, still thinking it through, "I thought if he died, I would too. I was like him, Margaret."

"You were human first, you were always human. He couldn't kill that part of you." She held him tighter.

"And you were always a witch." He laughed. "How does it feel to be in love with a human?"

"The same as it felt loving a demon."

A/N: So that's the end Bell and good riddance! I hope you all enjoyed this one, I think I have one more chapter up my sleeve but then that will definitely be the end. Thanks to everyone who has followed and reviewed so far. I'm hoping to get the last chapter out by next weekend but no promises. Please read and review it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!