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Infinitum

Ch. 6

Arielle sighed in contentment, leaning lightly against Loke's shoulder as she turned the page of the book that Mrs. Heartfilia had given her to celebrate their first year living in Crocus. Loke's arm was draped carelessly across her shoulders, and he smiled at her as he leaned his head back. He continued listening to the Dragon King Tournament on the broadcast lacrima he'd recently purchased secondhand. He had saved money for three months so that they could listen to the news. She often read the paper while he was out, when she was between weavings, but when he returned from work he was usually too tuckered out to care and relied on the pinkette to relate anything important.

"We'll get tickets next year," he mumbled slightly as the cheer rose for one of the combatants. "We'll get tickets and have a blast."

Arielle decided not to mention that there would quite possibly be a live dragon and a very real possibility that spectators could be harmed in the crossfire. Instead, she just hummed her agreement, stifling a yawn as the sun sank lower in the sky. The lacrima blared on, the announcer giving each blow-by-blow as the last fight of the day waged on. They had been going at it for quite a while already, and the woman knew that one of them would tire out soon enough.

It was only the third day of the games, so all of the mages, especially those famed dragonslayers, were fighting for the right to face a true dragon. Arielle was still a bit skeptical about the actual appearance of a dragon in the games, but she didn't bother to voice that thought. And, even if there was a real dragon, as long as it left she and Loke and the populace in peace, she really didn't care.

Most of the dragons nowadays were relatively neutral towards humans, at least from what she'd heard, so she didn't dwell on the thought of them for too long.

"Damn, it was the mage from Dragonsbane that won," Loke groaned as his pink-haired companion finally gave in to the descending darkness and closed her book. "I was really rooting for the underdog. And the guy from Sunset Striker put up such a good fight!"

"It certainly was the longest fight of the day," she said carefully, smiling at his enthusiasm whilst hiding her own mild disinterest. "I'm afraid I don't understand many of the fighting terms they've been using, though."

"You coulda said something!" He exclaimed, twisting to look at her as she sat up and stretched. "Tomorrow, I'll show you some of the things they're talking about!"

His bright grin was enough to make her giggle as she tried to turn him down.

"No, Loke, it's fine!"

"No, no, I insist!" he jumped up from the couch, all energy whereas just a few minutes ago he had been tuckered out from working long hours during the day. "In fact, I'll explain some now! You know the easy ones, of course, like left jab and right hook, but…"

Ari hid her laughter behind her hand as he made a few warm-up jabs and a hook to punctuate his words and then proceeded to demonstrate some of the more difficult moves while narrating. Some of his poses were absolutely ridiculous without a partner. It still took the orange-haired young man a while to notice that her laughter, which had risen in volume, was directed at him. A light flush spread across his cheeks.

"Hey, I know it looks stupid, but I'm trying to help you!"

"N-no," she gasped, trying to stifle her laughter as she waved her hand dismissively at him, "it's okay! Keep showing m-me, go ahead!"

His footsteps creaked across the floor and she felt herself being pulled to her feet. Arielle let out a surprised squeal as she found herself, quite suddenly, trapped in a headlock. Loke was gentle with her, but it was still a little unnerving to feel her stockinged feet skating across the floor. She started laughing again, fingers scrabbling at his arms with weak, half-hearted protests.

"Now how stupid does it look, huh?" he teased, switching to a different method of grappling.

Unexpectedly, Ari slipped her foot behind his ankle and pulled his leg out from under him. With a startled yelp, he toppled backwards, thankfully shifting his forearm so he didn't choke her when she collapsed on top of him. They were both briefly dazed by that turn of events, but finally the pinkette rolled off of her friend with a gasp and a quick apology, sitting up next to him and looking down at him to make sure he wasn't hurt.

Loke stared at her, wide-eyed, and then a chuckle spilled out, followed by laughter. Arielle started to giggle then, and they just stayed where they were on the floor, laughing together, for several minutes.

Eventually, the orange-haired man tugged her down beside him, the pinkette letting out another startled sound, before relaxing. Her head rested on his arm and they both looked up at the ceiling, chests heaving from the exertion. After a few moments of the two catching their breath, Loke pulled her tighter against his side with a content sigh, and Arielle turned to snuggle closer. Her head now rested on his shoulder, one hand lightly on his chest, while his fingers gently curled around her own shoulder.

"We haven't done this in a while, Ari," he murmured softly against her hair. "I've missed it."

Glad that her new position effectively hid her rosy cheeks, Ari nodded and made a sound of agreement, whispering, "I've missed it, too."

Neither of them knew how long they stayed like that, but just like in their childhood, the two slowly drifted off.

When she opened her eyes to find the ceiling of her Spirit World apartment above her rather than one made of shabby wooden planks, Aries wanted nothing more than to roll over and cry.

This wasn't the first time in the last few weeks, either. Since she had started having the dreams of these alternate versions of herself and of Leo, they had been becoming even more real with every scene she trespassed upon. She felt herself growing attached to them, felt herself living the moment as if she were Arielle instead of Aries, the Ram spirit of the zodiac. And when she woke up to reality, knowing that she and Leo the Lion would probably never have that same relationship, she found herself extremely heartbroken.

Instead, she pushed herself up out of bed, glancing over to the sleeping girl on the other side of the room. It was just before dawn, but Aries knew that sleep would be impossible after a dream like that…or, rather, after the disappointment that waking up caused. Desperate to take her mind off of the events in her dreams, she slipped quietly out of bed and into the kitchen, starting a pot of coffee.

The Ram wasn't always a coffee person, but she felt like the bitterness might snap her back to reality a little more quickly. She didn't want to seem too distracted when Lyra woke up, because she had an unnerving way of knowing just what Aries was thinking. Or, if she didn't know what Aries was thinking, she knew when she wasn't feeling her best, or was working through an extremely difficult situation on her own. Aries wanted to prevent that at all costs.

"S-sorry," she murmured, mostly to the Lyre, as she poured herself a steaming cup of coffee and gently slid into a spot at the table. She tried to ignore the way her hands were shaking.

Her eyes slid closed as she sighed and yet, no matter how she tried, she couldn't banish the memory of snuggling against his side, both of them breathless from laughter, as they talked briefly and then drifted off to sleep. It had seemed so familiar, somehow, as if Aries had done more than just dream about it, and it irked her. And on top of that, it had just seemed so real. Nothing in these dreams had ever even seemed fake, but this time there was more to it. She had felt Loke's warmth as she curled into his side, she could smell cream he'd used when he had shaved after washing up, and she could even smell the faint floral scent of the soap she'd used to wash their clothes in earlier that day.

Her eyes snapped open and she jerked to attention.

"I never dreamed about laundry," she rasped to the silent room, hands reaching for the coffee cup. Her fumbling fingers nearly knocked it over as she quickly raised it to her lips. The Ram didn't even care how hot it was, even as it burned going down. Only when she was stifling a few startled coughs seconds later, a bit of coffee sloshing over the side of her cup as she nearly slammed it down, did she even realize it was almost too warm for consumption.

The floodgate was open now, though, and she had clear memories rushing through her mind. She was always doing the laundry over a basin in the backyard of the house she shared with Loke, usually in the middle of the day while he was at work. Some days, she was humming happily as she paused to wring the water out of something. Other days, she was stressed and just wanted the task to be done. Each time she finished, her fingers were wrinkled from the water. If she didn't get to finish before Loke got home, he'd sneak up behind her and pull whatever she was working on from her hands, reaching to continue it himself with a grin.

She found her hands fisting in her hair, her eyes burning as she squeezed them closed. It didn't stop the images from flashing across her memories, one after another.

He was laughing so hard he was crying—and then they were play-fighting in the living room again, during another day of the Dragon King Tournament, but this time Loke was victorious. The memories kept coming.

Not memories! The Ram gasped, her eyes snapping wide again. Why was she already treating them like memories, when she had only been having these dreams for a few months now? Why was she acting as if it was completely normal?!

We haven't done this in a while, Ari. I've missed it.

His words echoed in her head and she wanted to believe it. She did believe it, for just a few seconds. And then she gasped.

"It isn't real, Arielle—Aries!" her voice turned into a squeak at the slip, and she ripped one of her hands from her hair to slam a fist on the table. Her cup jumped, but she tried to ignore it. "Aries, I'm Aries. I'm the Ram, one of the members of the zodiac. I'm not…I'm not her!"

No matter how much I want to be..

She forced herself up from her seat, rushing to the kitchen sink on order to splash her face with cold water. Her legs hardly worked and she had to lean heavily on the island in order to work her way to the sink, but she did so with all haste. She repeated her name like a mantra, each time serving as a new splash of water to the face.

The pink-haired spirit didn't even hear the door, or the gentle padding of bare feet. The touch on her shoulder made her gasp, taking a quick step to the side as she turned to face the worried girl.

"Aries…" Lyra murmured softly, and the Ram felt as the water from the hair surrounding her face slowly began to saturate the collar of her nightgown.

"Sorry," she bit out as quickly as possible. "Sorry, I just…"

"These dreams are getting worse, aren't they?" the Lyre asked softly, and Aries flinched away from the light touch on her shoulder. "You're having them almost every night now. You should really talk about it, Aries."

"It…it isn't just dreams anymore," Aries managed, eyes burning as the realistic images returned. She tried in vain, once more, to quash the memories that were surfacing by closing her eyes, but that only made them more vivid, more lifelike. "I…I'm starting to have flashbacks. During the day. Of dreams I haven't even had. And they're all so real. And then I wake up, or I realize that it's not true, and I just…"

A garbled sob escaped, and the Ram forced a quick apology out as she spun on her heel, her back to the musical spirit, and muffled another sob with her fist.

"I…I called myself Arielle," she choked, crumpling to the ground.

"Oh, Aries…" she heard her roommate drop down beside her, a slim arm sliding around her shoulders.

"The worst part is that it felt natural," the words were barely more than a whisper, but with the way Lyra's arm tightened around her shoulders, she knew that the Lyre had heard. She just hugged the Ram more tightly, starting to hum softly. The sound made it easier for the tears to fall, made the memories blur just a little.

Lyra always seemed to know exactly what Aries needed in order to calm down.

After a few hours had passed, the day had returned to some semblance of normality. Aries had returned to her usual self after a shower and breakfast and one new song from Lyra. The prospect of going out for a little bit of shopping, however, sent shivers up her spine because of the possibility that she would run into Leo the Lion.

She had managed to return to normal, but just the thought of the real counterpart of the Loke in her dream opened a raw, emotional wound.

Until now, it had been enough for her to love him all on her own. She had been in denial about it, certainly, but she had liked him for almost as long as she could remember, despite his womanizing ways. But now, after experiencing just what it could be like for the two of them to be together, comfortably, with or without romance…she wasn't sure she could face him. Aries was afraid that she would start wanting that contact with him, even though she had been content with their relationship thus far.

Aries was afraid that loving him on her own wouldn't be enough anymore.

She did, however, try to prepare her heart by rolling her shoulders and taking deep breaths. If she were to run into him soon, she had to try to maintain her composure or else he'd know immediately that something was wrong. Leo was clever that way.

Lost in her thoughts, she was just reaching for her purse as Lyra slipped out of the bathroom.

"Ready to go?" the musical spirit asked with a bright smile.

"Y-yes!" Aries stuttered slightly, taking a readying breath. "S-sorry!"

"Thank you," the Lyre teased lightly, slipping her arm through the Ram's as she headed towards the door. Aries mumbled a thank you as had been suggested and Lyra giggled as they prepared to head out.

The market wasn't for a few days but they had found themselves lacking in a few much-needed groceries, so a trip to the store had become a necessity. And as much as Aries dreaded the possibility of running into Leo…she also kind of hoped for it.

Her emotions were a very confusing mess at the moment.

"I can't believe we're nearly out of flour," the Lyre mused softly as the two stepped from the apartment and Aries carefully locked the door behind them. "I guess we just mistook the extra sugar for flour at some point and didn't bother to make sure? And I didn't expect to bake so much this week!"

"I'm sorry, I should have bought extra eggs!" the Ram ducked her head, and her pink locks tumbled around her cheeks.

"No, no, no!" Lyra nudged Aries with her shoulder, "It's not your fault at all!"

"I-if you say so."

"I do! And so would anyone else, if you asked them! You can't always be at fault for everything, Aries."

"I know!" an indignant flush dusted her cheeks. "I'm sorry, but sometimes it's really hard to find something else to say!"

Lyra started to respond, and then she just broke into a fit of giggles. When she had composed herself, she put on her stern expression and turned to her companion. With a deep breath to prepare herself, she finally said, "Aries, you did it again! You apologized for something that you didn't have to apologize for."

"I'm—"

"Don't say it!" the shorter girl put her finger to Aries's lips quickly, and the Ram stopped abruptly. It was hard, but she bit back the urge to apologize for almost apologizing, too. After a few seconds, Aries nodded to Lyra and the other girl took the sign to remove her finger. Lyra nodded in approval and did so, beaming. "That's more like it!"

Aries just sighed as the energetic music spirit flounced ahead, grinning softly and shaking her head.

She desperately tried to ignore the memory of a certain orange-haired man doing the same thing down a flower-lined street as they explored the inner city streets of Crocus on a pretty spring day…

It was two weeks before Aries could fully quell the urge to hide as soon as she saw orange hair. She'd managed through a few conversations with the Lion with little incident, but she knew that he had probably seen through her. And as she stared at her ceiling as the night wore on, she knew that, somehow, she wanted him to ask what was wrong. Just the thought of that scared her even worse.

If he asked what was wrong, it would be confirmation that he was attentive. If there was a possibility he'd been having the same dreams, she could find out.

A small part of her whispered that it couldn't possibly be coincidence if he was having the same dreams as she was. There had to be some meaning in these dreams, or memories, if she wasn't the only one plagued by the images time and time again.

At first they were just like memories. She could remember laughing with him until she couldn't breathe, or running through the fields before they moved to Crocus, laughing and playing because they only had each other, and they were happiest when they were alone. She remembered the way his arms felt around her when he comforted her as she cried, and the way he spoke softly in her ears to calm her down. She remembered the heartache she felt when she had to play doctor after other villagers, in their disdain for magic, had sought him out and roughed him up.

But they weren't just images now.

As she lay in bed, she could almost feel Loke breathing next to her and smell the shampoo they had bought at the market on her birthday. She could hear his gentle heartbeat and taste his horrid cooking—but she could say, with some confidence, that he had gotten better.

And she could also say, with progressively wavering certainty, that she had never experienced these things with Leo the Lion.

It took me two months from the time I started this chapter to actually finish it, but here it is!

I had a lot of work that piled up on me and I very nearly failed the first exams in two separate classes, so I focused more on school than fanfiction. I bit off a lot more than I can chew, but I will not give up on this story! That much I promise you. I'm very attached to this plot!

Anyway, thanks so much for reading, and I'm sorry for the delays.