100%, bitches!

It's probably worth noting that those two were actually supposed to meet on an elevator in Chicago. Whoops! I didn't know until Sue sat me down for my performance review. All those times she was telling me to be patient was because of this! And I thought it had to do with my leveling up in Candy Crush.

I'm pretty sure that now I'm going to get my wings. Or possibly something even better, like a new Golden Kingdom handbag. Ohh, I've also got my eye on these amazing Hallelujah Heels.

Don't tell anybody that, or I'll get another "material possessions" lecture. Whatevs.

So, I guess you're probably more interested in the two lovebirds than me. Although, I don't know why or how that's possible.

I would love to tell you all about their lives and whatnot. After I get people together, though, I get totally bored with them. Once I turn their files into Schue, I'm done. Schue is the guy responsible for keeping soulmates together. Dicey work, I say. He's so boring that it kinda suits him. And considering the divorce rate, he's not exactly the epitome of job security.

I wouldn't worry, though. They've been Sugar'd. Might as well be destiny or whatever the new age hippies call it these days.

Peace out.