Chapter 11
The final hour

The Doctor let out a bellow of fury while he sat helplessly watching his Clara's body grow stiff as the mind-melding machine took hold of her. Her eyes fluttered shut and she clutched her beautiful brown eyes tight. Tears sprang from them. The bright tears freely ran down her cheek.

Unable to watch anymore, the Doctor began to struggle at his bindings, he had to get to her, fast. He pulled and twisted at his wrists with all the strength he could muster. He felt the fabric cutting deeply into his skin but he didn't care, he had to get Clara. He pulled, tugged and shook the whole cage violently trying to free himself. The iron cage rattled loudly over the mind-melding machine hum. The Doctor let out another howl of frustration.

-"Clara!" He roared violently.

His outcry must have brought Donna out of her stupor because she suddenly spurred into motion and rushed to his side to help him out of the tight handcuffs Clara had made with her sweater.

-"We need to get out of here." Donna panted out while she struggled at the bindings.

-"Not until I get Clara." He shouted, unable to control the level of his voice.

Both his hearts were beating erratically. He felt his stomach churn and his mind clouded in a haze of anger and grief. All he could see was Clara's limp body, sickly splayed on the chair like some discarded ragdoll.

-"No, Doctor!" Donna shouted back. "It's too late for her. We need to go."

The Doctor ignored Donna and kept his eyes on Clara, her head had slumped forward and her whole posture had sunk down. The sonic screwdriver that she had clung to so tightly had been released and laid on her lap.

-"No, no!" He screamed, grief-stricken at the sight of his wife. "She can't – " He swallowed thickly at the bile rising in his throat.

Donna untighten the last of the knots that held his hands together. His arms fell limply on his lap. They tingled from having been in the same position over his head for so long but he ignored the uncomfortable feeling. He scrambled to his feet, ready to dash over to Clara, but he felt Donna's hand wrap around his arm.

-"Doctor, we have to go, this whole place is about to blow." She pleaded, but the Doctor ignored her again and made another attempt to go rescue Clara, only to be held back. "Please, Doctor!" She begged. "Don't let her sacrifice be for nothing. She did this to save you, to save the whole universe, we have to go or the TARDIS will explode."

Donna's begging words slowly sunk in. He knew Donna was right. The TARDIS would blow up and cause the universe to collapse in on itself. Has much as this pained him, he had to go ... he had to leave Clara. Tears sprang to his eyes as he looked around and realized that the mind-melding machine had caught fire and was emitting several distressing beeps.

At the same moment Walter Simeon dashed into the room with a loud scream.

-"No, no!"

Without faltering a step he ran right to the machine where the flames roared to life. Simeon disappeared into the dark cloud of smoke in hopes of saving his machine, but after a minor explosion nearby, the fire wildly sprung up and it became obvious that Simeon would not be coming out.

-"Doctor, please." Donna begged again.

Glancing back at Donna's face, the Doctor didn't fail to notice the tears that stained her face. Donna Noble. One of the strongest women he had come to know needed him to get her out of here. The Universe needed his help once again. It was a vicious cycle with no happy ending in sight for him. The Doctor's shoulders sagged as he squared his jaw and bit back all the foul things he wanted to sputter and scream at the injustice of it all.

He faced the mind-melding machine which was fully engulfed in flames. He couldn't see Clara anymore. She was gone. He stared at flames for a moment longer, silently promising he would find his wife, whether it was in this life or the next, he would get his Clara back. The Universe owed him that and he didn't care what it would take, he would get his Clara back.

With that he shook out of Donna's grasped and turned towards the TARDIS.

-"Let's get out of here." He ordered.

Today's Clara.

Clara woke up with a start. Her body was covered in sweat. She panted hard, trying to catch her breath all the while frantically looking around. In panic she grabbed her chest and patted her whole body down.

-"I am okay ..." She whispered, realizing she was in her bed. "It was just a dream."

She exhaled a long pent up breath she didn't realize she was holding. She was not dead. The dream though ... it had sure felt like she was dying. She could still feel the awful machine she had sat in as it had wormed its way through her thoughts, slowly eating and burning away everything that had been her...

Suddenly feeling sick and unbearable hot, Clara kicked her feet out of the blankets and sat on the edge of the bed. She glanced around her small room, which looked foreign to her. She remembered every single thing is this room. From the worn book of places she wanted to visit to the tiny ballerina jewelry box, she knew them all, but it was almost like she had been away for a long time and had forgotten all about them.

Clara jumped to her feet, suddenly feeling restless. There had been something about the dream ... something that felt off. She had died, to save the Doctor. But not her Doctor, another version of him, another face. A face that she didn't know, or at least not in this life but she knew him or at least she felt like she should know him.

As the seconds ticked by, more details came rushing back to Clara's mind. Things that were simply to detailed to just have been a dream. The way the Doctor had looked, the way he smelled ... the ways he had loved her. His name. He had told her his name. It had been very quick, but she recalled every syllable he had spoken to her that night

He had told her his name.

Clara quickly rushed to the small nightstand and grabbed the temperate water. With her hands shaking profusely she thirstily gulped down the liquid. The dream ... it had not been her, and it had not been a dream either. It was a memory, a vision into one of the echoes of herself. In all her previous echoes the Doctor had never seen her, noticed her ... except for this Doctor of course.

But it had been more than a simple encounter. The realization of everything hit Clara hard. The feelings of pain and loss. The love she had felt for the man she had saved.

Clara dropped the glass of water to the floor.

-"Oh God ..." She gasped, wrapping her arms around herself. "Doctor." She sobbed, unsure if she was upset at the fact that the Doctor had hid this from her or because she was happy that she had been able to save him all those years ago, or was her pain from so deep within at what she lost.

As if sensing her pain, the sound she longed to hear rang through the silent house. The TARDIS slowly materialized in the corner of her bedroom. Clara turned to face the blue box and once it was in its solid form she wasted no time and rush to the door. She barged inside, not waiting to be invited in. The door slammed loudly behind her as she suddenly stopped short at the sight of the man who was busy pressing several buttons on the console.

-"Clara, good, I was hoping I was in the right place, I tried once before and ended up in the Empire of Genghis Khan." The Doctor waved his hand through the air. "Let's just say he was not too happy to see me again." He chuckled not bothering to look up. "I was thinking we could go –" He rushed to one side of the console, "to the dwarf world of Aurora, there are real dwarves there, but don't call them that, they will get quite crossed." The Doctor looked up when Clara did not reply. He immediately noticed her ghostly white complexion and saddened expression. He stopped everything, his face sobered right away. "What's wrong?"

Clara slowly walked until she reached the console. Her eyes traveled the TARDIS in a daze. She recalled the old TARDIS ... when it had a more rugged look and she just knew the old Doctor would hate this. She scanned the room until her gaze landed on the Doctor. Her Doctor, the man she had come to know and love. But everything felt different now.

From the day he had come knocked on her door, she had known she would feel things for this man that she had never felt for anyone before. She loved him and she had proven that, but she had never entertained the possibility of their relationship being more than just friends. She actually had never really thought he could do the serious relationship. But now ... now it was different. Her heart swelled and it started to beat erratically.

-"Doctor." She whispered, unsure what else to say.

She didn't have to say anything. His expression fell.

-"You remember."

Clara nodded.

The Doctor quickly looked down at his console. He took a sudden interest in the buttons and levers in front of him trying his best to ignore Clara and the barrage of feelings that assaulted him, feelings he did not want and had buried centuries ago.

-"I had hoped you would never see that part of your echoes life." The Doctor finally spoke, still refusing to look up.

-"Why?" Clara's voice wavered with emotions. "I – We –" But she couldn't seem to finish any of her sentences. All of the memories were still too fresh in her mind.

-"It would just have been better." He mumbled, not willing to elaborate.

Clara, feeling very unsatisfied with his answer stomped over to his side and with surprising strength gripped his arm, forcing him to face her. The Doctor cast his eyes down, he couldn't look at her. Not when she was really seeing him.

But a tiny part of him was screaming to look, to see her finally recognize who he was to her. He lifted his gaze and was met with her big sad eyes. Oh, how he remembered those beautiful chestnut eyes and they finally saw him. The him that he had always been, the man who she had fallen in love with.

-"Doctor ..." She whispered.

Her voice pleading for something from him. He knew that tone. He had heard it before, but he couldn't give her what she wanted, not anymore. Clara reached out and with a gentle tenderness that made his hearts weep, she cupped his cheek. Her warm hand felt heavenly on his cool skin.

She had fallen in love with the man he had been and that man had disappeared long ago. All that remained now were memories, and he had been running from those for almost three hundred years. A sudden strange whisper echoed through the TARDIS, as if the machine itself was speaking to them. It spoke words they had both heard before.

"The man who forgets."

That was him. The man who lived with the pain of so much loss, but chose to forget it all and this was no different. He could not give Clara what she sought.

-"It was a dream, Clara." He finally spoke, taking a step back.

Her hand dropped away and the Doctor quickly turned away. He had to get away from her; he could not face what he had lost. With speed he began to walk away.

-"No, it was a memory." Clara spoke clearly from behind him. "We married, you said you loved me ..." The Doctor shook his head no, putting more distance between them, but Clara persisted. "I know your name!"

Stopping in his track the Doctor felt his annoyance flare.

-"That is not me, not anymore!" He shouted angrily. "So whatever fantasy tale that you cooked up in that funny little human brain of yours, you can forget it."

A sob escaped from Clara. The Doctor flinched but refused to turn around.

-"I can't forget it." She whispered.

The Doctor sighed and steeled his nerves before turning around to face Clara. When he did he hated what he was greeted with. Clara's tear-stained face. Her cheeks were bright red and puffy, her big eyes were swollen red, but she was as beautiful as the day he had ran into her at the shop.

-"Clara ..." The Doctor sighed sadly. He wished he could give her what she wanted. "Do you know how much time as gone by since that day I lost you?" She shook her head. "Many years ..." He shook his head sadly. "I cannot give you what you want, Clara." He repeated. "But if you go to the library, you might find what you need there."

The Doctor rushed out of the room, not giving Clara time to reply.

oOo

Clara watched the Doctor practically run from the console room. She couldn't help but suddenly feel very unwanted and confused. The rush of emotions that had come back to her was not only overwhelming but just plain strange. It was if everything had been a lie, but it had not because the Doctor had not really loved her after all.

Standing for the longest time, Clara listened to the soft humming of the TARDIS engines. The sound brought a certain comfort and let her gather her thoughts at least enough to realize she needed to get to the library where the Doctor had told she would find everything she needed.

Clara had only been in this part of the TARDIS once before. It was far too large and rather overwhelming. She really couldn't understand why the Doctor needed all these books that he never seemed to read.

Cautiously walking inside, Clara wondered what she was supposed to find here. It would have been better if he could have elaborated. Had he wanted her to find a book? She had once seen a giant volume about the time war ... she thought ... she couldn't quite remember, the thoughts of the book were fuzzy and her recalling it not only made her head hurt it seemed to make the Doctor upset.

Clara headed for the first bookshelf but before she could grab a book to start her search a loud static like noise reverberated through the room.

-"Clara?" A familiar, distant voice spoke.

Surprised, Clara whipped around and found a holographic projection of the man she had seen in her dream. The Doctor.

-"Clara?" It asked again.

-"Y-Yes?" She answered, uncertain it could hear her.

-"Ah, yes there we go." The slightly see-through image turned towards her and gave her the brightest smile. "Hello, Clara."

His tone was soft and made Clara shiver.

-"Doctor?" She paused, "can—can you actually hear me?"

The image of the Doctor was silent for a moment.

-"It's a bit complicated ... Yes and no." Clara frowned and the Doctor let out a musical laugh. "I know you are probably frowning at me right me. I recorded this, sort of." He waved his hand through the air, much like he did now, dismissing certain events that were not important at the moment. "I recorded this and the TARDIS is helping fill in the gaps with things I would probably say."

Clara nodded, still not too sure what exactly that meant, but it was good enough for her.

-"So you knew I would be back in the TARDIS?" Clara stood very still, afraid that if she moved a hair she would lose the image.

-"Well … I know or knew … Ah, this is just confusing." He groaned. "I know my future self will eventually meet you, and I know you are brilliant enough to remember those past lives you had." The Doctor's image flickered slightly. "I know you have questions and that I, well future me, might not answer them."

Clara shook her head.

-"I just don't know what to think ..." Tears welled up in her eyes. "I remember it all, you and I ... and you won't even acknowledge any of it."

The Doctor frowned.

-"Clara ... It's complicated ..." He sighed and looked to the ground, almost as if he were ashamed. "Things are happening now, I don't have much time to explain, but I lost you six years ago ... I just sort of been kicking it on my own. Donna is gone and it's just me and I am getting tired." He sighed. "I am not sure but when I do meet you again it will roughly be three hundred years from now ... I've had three hundred years to bury those feelings for you. I have lost ... so much." A small hiccup escape from the Doctor, but he quickly swallowed it. "I know it does not excuse anything I might say to you, but when you died ... a big part of me died with you, and even though I am a new man now – or will be, I know that I won't go back, I won't let myself feel those feelings for you, or anyone again."

As the Doctor spoke Clara realized what he was saying. That whatever it was that they had had, it was over. Whatever it is she had felt for him, it was to stay in the past.

-"I understand." Clara bit out, suddenly feeling very angry and bitter.

The Doctor frowned.

-"No, you don't." He stared at her with deep sorrow. "Just know that I do love you. I love you now and I will still love you in my next life. I might not show it like I did …" The image flickered again as the Doctor doubled over in pain. He let out a loud grunt.

Forgetting she was in front of a hologram Clara rushed over to the image, only to have her hand go through him. "I don't have much time left, Clara..." He groaned. "It's happening now." He flinched as he straightened back up. He turned his head in her direction and she felt her heart hitch. "I love Clara. Please remember that, and remember me as I am now."

The image faded and Clara was left standing once again, alone.

oOo

Several days had passed since Clara had seen the Doctor. He had been making himself conveniently scares and Clara was not really sorry about that. She had been thankful for the days to think.

The first day, she had tried to find him. She had never hunted anyone down before, not like this. She had searched high and low in the TARDIS, going through hundreds of rooms, but by the end of the day she had been exhausted and weary. She had of course not found the Doctor. That night she had cried herself to a fitful night sleep, but by morning she had come to a new realization. The words the Doctor had spoken to her from the past were starting to make sense.

She had never been the one he had fallen in love with. Those things had never happened to her. They were hundreds of years in his past. What is it exactly that she wanted from him? To pick back up where they had left off? That was rather ridiculous. He was not the same man, in more ways than one, and she was not that woman he had married.

She was not sure she could ever get over the feelings that were now embedded in her heart but she certainly understood why the Doctor wanted to forget … By the third day, Clara knew it was time.

With care, she walked into the TARDIS console room and found the Doctor down below, fiddling with several wires. When he noticed her approached he quickly stilled and observed her with a fear behind his old eyes.

-"Hi." She spoke softly. Her voice still raw from all the crying she had been doing.

-"Hi."

They both stared each other, as if trying to assess what exactly to do next.

-"What are you doing?" Clara asked, looking at all the wires that were hanging over her head.

-"I am trying to fix the homing beacon I installed."

Clara nodded, feeling slightly awkward but determined to let him know that she was okay ... that they were okay. So she did the only thing the Doctor would understand. She ignored the giant elephant in the room.

-"Remember when you told me about the planet with dwarves ... I thought we could go there." Clara paused. "If you wanted too."

The Doctor kept his hazel gaze on her for a long moment, scrutinizing every inch of her face as if he were analyzing her. Clara held her breath, sure he would tell her no, that she really needed to go home and he didn't want to see her again. But to her relief his lips broke into a wide smile.

-"I'd hoped you would want to go!" He jumped to his feet. "I have been dying to try their hairy ale; I heard it gives you a beard the size of London."

The Doctor rushed by Clara and like an excited child on Christmas morning he rushed up the stairs and out of sight but moments later he rushed back down and grabbed Clara's hand.

-"Thank you." He said sincerely.

With that he pulled her along with him, up the stairs and around the TARDIS console. Letting go of her hand, he scrambled to the lever and pulled it with a hard tug. The TARDIS made its familiar wheezing sound as the engines roared to life. Clara watched him work and although she felt a sadness in her heart, she knew she belonged by this man's side and that he did in fact care for her and he would protect her with his life, and that was enough for her.

The End.

A/N:

Thank you so much for enjoying this little story of mine. I really struggled with the ending. I could have really gone on and made quite a production of it, but when I started writing this story I only wanted a short story and I stuck to that. So it's a bit of a sad ending, but I think it's quite befitting for the fandom itself.

I do have a NEW Doctor who Fanfic. It is called "Listen for the bad wolf" It features the 12th Doctor and Rose :) Feel free to check it out.

There are two awesome videos for this fanfic on youtube, the link is in my profile.

Again thank you so much for reading and supporting.