-Okay, I know, I should be writing my other thing, "Oncoming Storms and East Winds", but I need to get this idea out of my head before it kills me. I'm re-reading The Hobbit again, so if I seem like I'm writing a bit like our friend, Tolkien- yeah. There it is. Hope you like the story!-

Why was no one ever punctual anymore?thought the man pacing in the industrial garage on a rainy English day in late October, 2013. I suppose that I would be doing the owner of the garage an injustice if I did not take time to describe it. On the outside, it was a normal garage - dingy, slightly scary, with lots of graffiti. The graffiti varied from smiley faces, to gang signs; names to slogans; and even a large set of wings with "I O U" written in red lettering. But on the inside, things where much different.

There was a sleek, black car on the left side of the large space- a Lincoln, by the looks of it. In the middle, there was a large mahogany table with four antique Victorian armchairs around it. The garage was dimly lit, except for the light pointed over the table, and a good thing too- there where devices of questionable appearance and usage in those shadows which I shall not get into. But back to the man that owned them.

The man wore his "business" suit- black Westwood, with a blue scull patterned tie- he was playful, in that way, celebrating his childhood, when he wanted to be a pirate.* He was pacing now, looking at his phone for the time, noticing that the people he was waiting for where 30 minutes late. He kept pacing, and selected the music app on his phone, and blasted "Stayin' Alive" as a distraction of his boredom.

Back a few years ago, he would be able to hail people at his will, with several men at hand, and several hundred across the world. But that was the old days, when he wasn't "dead". Someone was out there, taking down his web, and he knew it- in fact, he was almost letting him. One day he would come back, one day, but patience, he reminded himself. As much as Jim Moriarty was an impatient man, he was going to relish the day when he came back, bigger than ever. He smiled at the thought.(Whenever Jim Moriarty smiles, it is usually at the demise of another person. If not, then it is at the cleverness of himself. Often, those things coincide with each other.)

Finally, Jim heard four large bangs on the door of the industrial garage. He clicked his the music off. "FINNALLY!" He yelled, manually opening the door. That was another thing he hated too- he had to do a lot of work by himself. Sure, he was able to get fancy things still, but he didn't want to get on anyone's RADAR.

" Jeeze," Jim said, opening the door and grunting. " You would have thought you of all people could be on time, being a-"

" Don't." the shorter of the two men now facing Jim spat. The man who had just spoken was wearing a suit not dissimilar to Moriarty's- black and practical. He had dark hair, and a wild look in his ancient eyes. There where lines around his mouth from where he had smiled manically- all in all, he gave off an air of immense, and terrifying power. The slightly taller man behind him was just as scary, but in a warrior-like way, more of a reverence. He was dark haired as well, but unlike the man in the suit, he had piercing icy blue eyes, that where darting around the area, analyzing everything so he could use the area to his advantage if need be. He stood ramrod straight, and strangely enough, reminded Jim of an enemy of his, the man who was now dissembling his web of criminals- his name was Khan, and the other man, the shorter one, was known to most as the Master.

The Master shoved past Jim, and sat down in the arm chair that looked the most comfortable.

"I didn't come here for you to crack jokes about my race, James-"

" What did I say? Jim!"

" - and anyway, I did what you wanted," the Master said, gesturing at Khan, who was still standing near the door, leaning against it slightly. The Master continued, "So I think I deserve more respect especially from you, just a human." he said with a wicked smile. Khan suppressed a smile, but Jim took it differently.

" Look, Master," Jim said forced the name out- no one was his master. Only himself. He almost liked working with this sucker, though, so he continued, " We both know that we needed him- you where doing yourself a favor, really, remember that. And... really? Pointing the laser thing at me under the table? I'm disappointed! We both know that I know how to kill you too, pleeaaaase..." he said, rolling his eyes and snorting. The Master put away his Laser Screwdriver, and made a face.

" Good. Now- Khan, come on, you can sit over here!" Moriarty said, putting on his friendly face again. " We won't bite... or... I won't anyway, don't know about him," he said, laughing at his own joke. The Master scowled again, but once again, Jim didn't care.

Khan didn't like being hailed by these two imbeciles. He knew that as far as advantages went, he didn't have any right now. The one man, Jim, knew the layout well, most likely initiated this whole meeting, and the other, who Khan had just met the other day, was a Timelord. In his travels with his crew all those centuries ago(for him, in the future, it was three centuries- in Jim's time, 2013, another version of Khan was off committing genocide), he had heard legends of the Timelords, and he knew that even his own powers could be laughable compared to the psycho with the laser in front of him.

In short- Khan was still thinking of a way out of this, if possible. But it was better than the cryotube, and he was rather impressed with the two psychopaths in front of him. He walked over and sat down adjacent Moriarty, still sitting up straight, ready to jump out of the way of a laser if necessary.

Jim spoke again. " I see you've changed again," he said to the Master. He wasn't just trying to converse, he was actually trying to make sure that this was the Master, and not the other Timelord he had talked about- the Doctor, or whatever. " What was it this time?"

" Wouldn't you like to know?" the Master replied.

" Obviously I would."

" You wouldn't understand-"

" Oh, please."

" No. Even if you could understand- so what?"

" So what? You have the same face as when you where Harold Saxon, that's what! If you where the Doctor, for instance-" Moriarty replied, fingering his gun in his pocket.

" -Don't you even! Mention that name again, and I will end you," the Master replied, his usual flippant manner changing to a very serious, very overpowering one. Jim however was not fazed. He was used to it- from his own mind. Khan too, was still sitting normally, but he was starting to get impatient.

" I do believe we have a reason to be here!" Khan said, his baritone voice a mere mumble, but they two heard it.

" Oh, great, it speaks!" Jim said, smiling. Khan raised his eyebrow and cocked his head over to the direction of the Irishman, shortly considering the best way to kill him- nobody insulted his intelligence- but he let it go. This time. The Master, too, smiled, but then turned back to Jim.

" Why are we waiting, Moriarty? You said you wanted to discuss something, so I stole a Vortex Manipulator and got Khan out of his icebox, but yet we are waiting..." he said, with an edge of suspicion to his voice.

" We're waiting for one more. You'll like him," Jim replied, smiling again.

" Who, exactly?" the Master pressed. But Jim only made a zipper sign over his lips, and sat back, content.

" You're going to make us wait then, I presume?" Khan said, staring at a grinning Moriarty. He nodded, mouth still zippered shut.

" Wonderful," the Master sighed, leaning back in his chair. A few minutes passed, and Jim started to look at the door, impatient, no longer smiling. The Master was now leaning forward, hands on the table, tapping the surface with his fingers.

1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-4, 1-2 3-

" For the Lord's sake, just stop!" Khan said, his soldier-like composer finally failing. If there was one think the man could not stand, it was senseless noise, and being with the Timelord for the past two days, that beat had been played over and over, so that even he had wanted to tap it out!

Jim looked down at his fingers, which had automatically started tapping the 1234 beat without him realizing. He stared at the Master, who was staring at Khan.

" Still have the issue with the sound of drums? Even after the face change?" Jim teased.

" I thought I had resolved it, but no- always there. The drumming..." The Master replied, touching his head. That drumming had tormented his head since he was eight years old- 900 years of drumming in his head. He had always called it the drums of war. He had looked into the Vortex, and it had chosen him- not Rassalion, not the Doctor, him- to war. To be the Master of the Universe. No one would understand- but then again, no one else would be King of All, either.

Suddenly, the door opened, and a young police officer came in, gun pointed at the three villains.

Those three stood up, weapons in hand. Jim was reaching for his gun, Khan for the knife in his boot, and the Master, having already had his Laser Screwdriver out to threaten Moriarty, had his laser pointed at the officer's chest. The man would have several times over, if his face didn't start melting in front of them.

His short blond curls melted with a golden glow into shoulder-length, straight black locks. His pudgy face and fat body melted away into a much slimmer, more toned one. His uniform of black and white fused into a yellow, black and green warrior's tunic. In his hand was a golden scepter, with a glowing blue orb on the top. And most importantly- he was wearing a mischievous grin. In a regular setting, that kind of grin would make most people not trust the man. But in this garage, with this group of psychopaths, the grin meant he was on their side.

" Oh, how adorable- you mortals and your futile weapons," the man said, still grinning hugely.

" Oh, they're mortal-" the Master said, cocking his head over to Khan and Jim, " but me? I'm 908 years old with six more regenerations to spare. I may not be as old as you, but... not mortal," he added with a toothy smile.

" Would you like to test that?" the man said, raising his scepter. Jim Moriarty loved watching conflict, but these two fighting would go against his intentions, so he found himself coming between the two men, one hand against each man's torso.

" GENTLEMEN!" He yelled, his voice raising even higher than others had thought possible.

They stopped moving- their weapons where still aimed at each other, over Jim's head, but no one fired. They backed away. Khan was smiling now- things where not going to Moriarty's plans, it seemed. He had seen it coming- fill the room with egocentric psychopaths, and what else are you going to get? But he just sat back in his chair, holding is knife now, watching the play.

" Never thought I'd do that again, but really! Sit down over there, and you're going to listen to me, or I will personally test the theory of your immortality!" he said, his Irish accent thickening. Both men thought it funny that the shortest, least powerful of the four criminals in the room was giving them orders, but they did as he said, and sat opposite each other.

Everyone was sitting down- Khan still bolt upright, the Master less at ease, but still in an open manner, the new comer in a regal fashion, and Jim, for once, the most normal one in the room. But he quickly broke that by deciding to be a cheeky pain in the behind. He grinned as he introduced the men.

" Mi lord Loki of Asgard, I give you Khan Noonien Singh of Earth, and the Master of Gallifrey," he said, gesturing to each man, imitating what he knew would be Loki's speech.

" Khan and Master, I present Loki of-"

" Yes, I know who he is, don't be stupid," the Master interjected, rolling his eyes. Moriarty must have thought that he was showing the Master someone new- when in fact, he was not.

" Oh, you know him? You could have told me and made things easier, Master," Jim replied, getting angry. He knew mysterious, but the Master could be impractical!

Loki, however, took a turn to raise an eyebrow. " I have never met this man in my life- I suppose you have perhaps read of my greatness?" he said, grinning again.

" No, idiot- Gallifrey! I'm a Timelord!" the Master said, gesticulating dramatically. Loki, however, did not seem to understand the importance.

" I have not heard such an idiotic name before," the Asgardian said, to which the Master blinked several times. Even Khan was surprised. He had heard of both planets of course- being in the Federation told him of the Timelords, but being a child told him of Asgard. He scoffed, and turned his head to look at the god of mischief.

" You claim to be in charge of everything- you wish to take over everything, and yet you have no idea of other planets, not even the mighty planet of the Timelords? You have to get out of the realm of Yggdrasil," Khan said, chuckling deeply now. By this time, Loki was clenching his fists- it was not his fault that Odin confined him as a child, that his "brother" had shadowed him for centuries! But this Khan, as much as he was annoying, could stay- he was obviously a warrior, and that could be respected enough. He also, for some reason, reminded Loki of someone he once knew, but he shook that out of his head.

" How do you know so much about Asgard-?You," he said, to Khan, " I understand- your ancestors worshiped me for centuries. Do not deny it- I can tell Norse decent when I see it, it is obvious your mother told stories of me in the nursery. You, however, must explain-" he said, now staring at the Master.

" Hmm, now that is where it's interesting. See, while you're people are busy looking over the Nine Realms of what you call Yggdrasil, my people are up watching over the entire Universe. Yes, you heard me correctly," he affirmed with a broad grin when Loki gave him an incredulous look. He continued, " A a child, I was particularly interested in looking over Earth and it's surrounding Gallixies- your Yggdrasil, though we have another name for it back on Gallifrey. When I started looking down on your people, I took interest in you- a mostly mistrusted, powerful, supposedly insane warrior in the midst of a bunch of idiots. I sympathized," he said, giving a crazy smile, which Loki returned. " You claimed to be 'burdened with glorious purpose'- same story!"

" And that is the reason I called you here!" Moriarty said, finally breaking from his haze. Both he and Khan had become incredibly bored during this little speech between the two aliens, and had both been filtering.

" Reason being?" the Master asked.

" To take over the Universe, obviously?" Moriarty replied, slightly confused at his college's slowness. The other three men only laughed deeply, to which Jim sat there, mouth open- they weren't taking him seriously. They had been trying to take over sections of the Universe for years- since before he was even born, and now he wanted to join them together to succeed, and the where laughing? They should have been thanking him!

" You- of all people!" the Master said, giggling now. " You can't even take over London!"

" The Timelord is correct! The Warrior has potential as well, but you?" Loki added, laughing.

" And, last we checked you're officially dead, because my cousin decided to take you down- even if we three decided to take over as much as we could, of what use could you be?" Khan said, smiling wickedly.

Not again. No. This was not happening. Jim had been laughed at and beaten in school as a child- that's what had pushed him over the edge. He thought that people of his intelligence would at least listen to him- wait- cousin? Khan's cousin? How did Sigh even register with Holmes? But- it matched- the face, the voice, the tone, the eyes, the posture, even the smile, for goodness' sake. Not to mention- Khan had started his splurge of killing in the '90s- Sherlock would have been a teenager, maybe a decade younger. It fit.

That did it. This one- the cousin of Sherlock Holmes was here, laughing at him- James Moriarty? No- sorry.

He took his gun from out of his back pocket, and without warning to the giggling men, he pointed it up into the air, and shot, three times. Then- then, when he was a threat- even the "immortal ones" could get fatally injured- they listened to him- as always. And the world wondered why there where psychopaths.

They all looked over at him, wide eyed- Khan sat up straighter, if possible; the Master had pulled out his Laser, as a habit; Loki had raised his scepter, ready to fire- but all eyes where on Jim Moriarty, who was breathing deep breaths.

" See? See what happens when you underestimate me? I may not be an alien, or a genetically altered warrior, but have the brains- I have killed and controlled as many people as you-" he said, cocking his chin at Loki- " And figured out and used computers as complex as yours, Khan- just ask your cousin. Yes, I caught that!" he said, rolling his eyes again, " Master- we have a history. You three will listen to me- or, if you don't want to, I could call the Federation, Thor, and the Doctor within seconds..."

" You could not-"

" You have no ability to-"

" You wouldn't dare!"

" Is that a fact? Would you like to try that? Should I start with the Doctor? Tell him his friend isn't dead?" he asked, playfully, holding his phone. The Master laughed.

" You can't just call him!"

" TARDIS has a phone, you idiot- you drove it!"

" Like you'd know the number!"

" Really? 001456-"

" Okay, fine! Shut it, Moriarty, I get you're point!" the Master said, afraid that Loki could use the number as leverage.

" How-"

" Old agents in high places, Master, and that applies for all of your contact information!" Jim said, glancing around at the three men. " You really think I wouldn't do some research to use you if I needed? I'm disappointed, really, I am!" he said, making a fake pouting face. He leaned on the table now- his palms on the surface.

" Now listen." When none of the men protested, he sat down. Khan and Loki where both seriously considering stabbing him, but they held it, just in case they could use him.

" As my friend here said, I'm officially dead to the world. Last time I checked though, Khan is in a cryotube in Federation Earth, the Master is trapped in Gallifrey, and Loki is dead on an abandoned moon."

" And?" Khan spat- like he needed reminding from this puny-

" Well, that's rather the point of this, cheekbones! We're all dead- so if we tried and took over-"

" None of our adversaries would see it coming. Yes, obviously- I am working on that, back in Asgard, why would I need your help?" Loki said, smiling.

" And yet, here you are," the Master said, catching on to Jim's plan. The Drums where beating louder now- he processed this faster. " He means a Universal scale. But I don't see why we need to be together-"

" Because you need help. Ah-ah- ah, shut up. You know it's true. You two have been trying to take over forever now, and... really, failed," Jim said, sparing no offense. Khan chuckled,

" But why would I care? Why am I here?"

" You want to wipe out every race that you see not superior-"

" Dalek," the Master muttered. Jim gave him a look, then continued.

" - And if we're in charge of the Universe, you can do what you want."

" What about my crew?" he said- he had made a vow to them, he was not going to break it.

" Fine. Whatever, but you need to help us," Jim said, rushing his words in excitement.

" So- why are you in this? What do you get from it? You cannot help us, really in any way? Have you any hidden powers, besides your rather admirable deception?" Loki asked, staring at Moriarty.

" I had enough brains to get you three together, remember? What do I get from it? I get so... bloody... BORED with life, like you would not imagine- no, I need something to do!" Jim said, shrugging.

" So then- you want us to all band together and figure out how to take over the Universe at large- all of it?" the Master summed up, trying not to yell over the drumming.

" Well... yes. You get to br a Master of the Universe, Loki gets to be king of Asgard and more, Khan and his buddies can kill who they want, and I get to have a little fun!" Moriarty said like it was an obvious fact. The Master liked the sound of that- immensely. Loki relished the idea of rubbing it in- but Khan said,

" That is all well and good, but you are all missing something."

" Umm.. no?" Jim said.

" Yes- too obvious, really," he said, sounding too much like Sherlock, to the chagrin of Jim.

" Pray tell?" Loki pressed.

Khan rolled his eyes. " Let me break it down: we've all been classified as narcissistic psychopaths, correct?" The other three men nodded- after a while, they had actually taken those two words as compliments, as did Khan. " The fact that we're all agreeing to work together is one thing- but soon, one of us will ask who will lead this group. Loki will say he should, because he is of Royalty, and a warrior. Moriarty will say he should, because he initiated this whole meeting, and the Master will say he is to be the one, because he is a Lord of Time. I will proceed to say that I know how to stratify better than any of you idiots." he finished.

The four of them sat there, for a bit. Kind of shocked, really. Of course, each man was going to say exactly what Khan said. But now that it was exposed, it was kind of useless. After 30 of silence and calculations, Moriarty, as much as he hated with all of his non-soul, said, " Fine. Democracy then. We rule the Universe together- I hate it too, but Khan has a point, gentlemen," he said, raising his high voice over the clamor that was starting around the table. Each man, to their chagrin, relented.

" Fine."

" Deal."

" My word."

"Good, that's settled! Now..." Moriarty confirmed, as he launched his part of the plan. The villains conversed, often arguing, for the next several hours. They got their plan down, in the end though, with agreement of complete democracy.

But of course, Khan said to himself, was going to kill them all, once he got his crew. They would be the rulers- they would be supreme.

But, Loki smiled to himself, of course these mortals would suffer under his power. He and he alone would be king. He was burdened with glorious purpose- and he would carry that burden gladly.

Whatever those two where planning, the Master thought, he would still come out on top, even if he used up those regenerations. The Drums of War where now pounding in his head- and he, for once, loved it.

But, no matter what those idiots had in mind- Jim Moriarty was still going to win, in the end. No one could get to him, and no one ever would. He would be in charge- because honey, you should see him in a crown.

Several weeks later, in January, phase one- Lazarus- was initiated. Jim hooked up all of the computers, with the help of Khan, and found his old codes for the main frame of all of England. In 10 seconds, he would be alive again. The world would see- you couldn't just put down a super villain that easy.

Five, four, three, two-

" Did you miss me?"

*You know I'm doing something with that later!