Yume

Disclaimer : I do not own Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. CLAMP does.

Summary : Even if they are just false beings, merely created to serve a purpose, they still deserve to be happy.. don't they? Rated M for sexual content.

A/N : I finished reading this manga around a month ago, and I am yet to get over it. It broke my heart and I think this fic was the result.

This fic is based on the clones, who cease to exist towards the end of the manga. And the ending refers to the fact that Syaoran is still travelling in search of a way to get them back.

The minute I saw her standing under the Sakura tree, the blossoms falling gently with wind, I knew it was her. It was more than just the emerald eyes or the chestnut hair that I had grown to love, in what seemed like a past life, it was the familiar tug at the bottom of my heart that had always gripped me every time I saw her.

A month has passed since I saw her near my family shrine in Hong Kong. A month has passed since I brought her into my home and told her I would never let her go.

She stands in front of me, beautiful as ever, and it is then that I notice the haunted look in her eyes, a sense of desperation that mirrors my own. She smiles and tells me that she loves me, a smile that almost reaches her eyes. I do not doubt the sincerity of her words. I have waited a lifetime, to find her, to tell her that she is my world.

The words do not come out. I reach for her instead, pulling her close to me, wanting to feel her in my arms. The sensation is too much for me to describe, the feelings of loneliness that we have endured too powerful to fade away in just an instant. They are invisible, but they cling to us with a tenacity that I try desperately to overcome, pressing my lips to hers.

I cannot help it but I pour my emotions into that kiss, a mixture of love, need and fear, all rolled into one. Fear, that the indescribable pleasure I get from holding her in my arms will be a transient one, gone before I can grasp it fully.

She deepens my hesitant kiss, understanding and absorbing all the tumultuous feelings running through my mind, as if they are similar to her own. This is the Sakura I have always loved, the only who can ever provide me solace.

"Syaoran-kun," she says, her sweet breath mingling with mine. "Hime," I whisper, nipping at her lips admonishingly, "You told me you'd call me Syaoran." Her cheeks pink up in the most adorable way, and I know that flashes of a different life are running through her mind. It is confusing for me too, the past, the present, the future. And the uncertainty of an alternate dimension.

Her hands snake their way into my hair, and she levels with me, unleashing the full intensity of her brilliant green eyes. "I am so glad I found you," she whispers, her breath hot on my ear before she kisses it. The words are laced with a hint of desolation I cannot ignore. I cannot bear the thought of Sakura feeling that way; I have battled with those feelings myself.

I tip her chin upwards, angling her face into mine, giving me easier access to the depths of her mouth that I am so eager to consume. As I ravage her mouth with my tongue, I feel her hands on me, inching my robe apart. Her fingers are smooth, cool, almost porcelain.. as if they were too perfect to be true. I lose myself to pure sensation as I see her hands splayed on my chest, roaming, her eagerness matching my own.

Her actions elicit an urgent, feverish response from me. I tug at her robes pulling them apart in one stroke. She gasps, startled by my unexpected move. I am surprised myself. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I realize that I am no longer completely aware of my actions. My body is acting on a subconscious, primal level.

She takes her hands away from me, using them to clumsily pull her robe together. The sudden lack of contact with her makes me cold. I can feel my own cheeks heating up. Maybe I shouldn't have reacted so.. strongly.

Sighing, I sit on the edge of the bed and pull her to me, wanting to apologize. I pull her close and look up at her, the height difference resulting in my head at chest level. Suddenly I do not remember what I wanted to say.

Her face is flushed, her chest moving attractively in time with her irregular breathing. The look in her eyes has changed. They are darker now and it is as if they are calling out to me.

Her hand is clutching the front of her robe, right above my head. I take in the way it falls slightly off her shoulder and opens at the the top of her right thigh, exposing a long, slender leg. I cover her hand with my own. "You're so beautiful when you're shy." I trail kisses along her knuckles. "But don't be, Sakura," I say, my voice hoarse.

I can see that my attempt at persuasion has worked, as she sucks in her breath, loosening her grip over her robe. She lets her robe fall open and I am completely thrown. My mouth runs dry at the sight of her, naked and in my arms.

I stand up and push the robe off her shoulders and pull her to face me. She is beautiful and I want to see all of her. I run my hands along the length of her body and I am consumed by an uncontrollable desire. In one swift motion, I push her onto the bed, trying to be as gentle as I can despite the heat that has spread throughout my body.

My body is completely awake and I devour her with my eyes. The time for shame has long since passed. I capture her lips once more, my hands instinctively resting on her bare hips. I trace my hands along the length of her perfect legs and she sighs, moving them to wrap them around my hips.

Her hands were playing their own game, trying their level best to free me of my pants. My hands travel up her stomach to the valley of her breasts, shaping them. I look into her eyes, wanting to check one last time if this was really okay with her. "Syaoran," she murmured her voice low and wanting. She pushed my hands upwards, more forcefully on her breasts. "You don't have to be so careful with me."

Oh god, If she only knew, how much I wanted her.. How badly I wanted her..

"Please Syaoran. I need this as much as you do." It was then that I realized the truth in her words. I need this. I need to feel her body against mine. She is scared too. Scared that these moments together are just too good to be true. That we will be pulled apart by choices and wishes that we cannot control.

She kisses me with an urgency that is overwhelming. As I kiss her, I realize my hands are everywhere. They are skimming, exploring, every inch of her body. With great difficulty, I tear my lips away from hers. My lips follow the patterns that my fingers have traced, branding her with kisses all over.

It is a desperate act to prove that this love is real, that WE are real, not just false beings created with a twisted purpose.

And in that moment I feel like my purpose is to love her, to cherish her, and show her that she is the center of my universe.

Her legs are wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer to her, to that place which is so eager for me. MY mouth is on hers again and this time it is rough, passionate and unrestrained. Our bodies have found a wonderful friction between each other; I rub against her opening over and over, loving the feel of her desire against me.

"Enough. Syao, please.." She is moaning now, writhing under my body and I realize that I am addicted to this sound and sight of her, completely giving in to her pleasure.

I groan and unable to bear this assault on my senses I slip into her. She cries out at the resistance her body has towards me, and for a moment I still. I am caught between the desire to give into the delicious heat at her core and the good sense to stop because I was hurting her.

"I want you, Syaoran," she whispered and I have no choice but to grant her wish because it mirrors my own. I move in and out of her, the indescribable pleasure possessing me to go faster and faster. All sense of control has escaped me. I throw her legs over my shoulder and push into her. Her incoherent screams of pleasure resonate in my ears and I am panting her name over and over, telling her that I love her.

Moments later, we have found the peak of our pleasure as she comes undone in my arms, her body convulsing around me. Her walls squeeze tight capturing me, as I let go and release myself into her.

My body collapses, bringing her down on top of me and I take a moment to study the wonderfully exhausted woman in my arms. Her lips are swollen and red and her eyes are closed contentedly as she murmurs my name. This is how I like her best, happy and relaxed, not worried all the time.

I brush a chaste kiss along the side of her lips. "You are everything to me, Sakura." It is true. I have survived my fair share of loneliness and despair without her and I am happy to have her in my arms finally. I am confident that someday we will truly be able to forget the trauma of our past, as long as we have each other.

She opens her eyes, and I see that the fear is back. But this time it is worse. It is pure unadulterated terror in her eyes, and it eats at my soul. "Syaoran, I lov-"

I open my eyes and I am disoriented. I cannot see anything. I am surrounded by the abyss of darkness once more. I am not in Hong Kong, and my Sakura is not with me. The despondency settles in with almost as much finality as the darkness.

I know then that I am truly and utterly alone, with not even the fragments of my dream to keep me company.

But the tiniest part of me dared to hope. That there would be some way to make us live again, some way for me to meet her again..

Syaoran.

A/N : This is my first time writing in first person. I hope it wasn't a drag. I know it was a little sappy, but their love is consuming and yet so sad at the same time, that I just got lost in the details. :P

Oh well. Please review. Tell me what you think of this fic.. I wasn't too sure of the idea, but I had to write it anyway. :P And ofcourse, tell me how I can get better. :)

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