Note: This chapter has been updated ONCE AGAIN as of September 08, 2014. Again, I haven't changed much, I just fixed several errors.

Disclaimer: Tom the cat, Jerry the mouse, Spike the dog, and Butch the cat are owned by Turner Entertainment and Warner Brothers. I'm just borrowing them in order to express my twisted and insane thoughts in a work of fiction.

Note: This takes place around the year 2006. Keep that in mind while you read.

Another Note: I don't know if I said this before but I decided to make Tom and Butch brothers in this fic. I know that they are not brothers in the cartoon but I like the idea of them being brothers. When I watch them on the cartoons, I just feel like they could easily be imagined as brothers so there you go!

Also, Tom may come off as a jerk in this fic. If you're a Tom lover, then you might want to brace yourself. Although, if you ARE a Tom lover then I don't see why you watch Tom and Jerry. Tom always loses in the end, so if he's your favorite character then you have no business watching Tom and Jerry.

XXXXX

It was a lovely morning. The sun's rays were beginning to light up the city as it started to wake up. The birds were chirping happily has the sun slowly rose into the sky. It was the kind of beautiful morning that made you want to get up and sing.

Of course, that was not the case for Tom the Cat. All Tom wanted to do was sleep in. Tom was never a morning person.

Tom the Cat was an actor who played on the famous T.V. show "Tom and Jerry". Well, it used to be famous anyway. Modern kids just didn't care much for "Tom and Jerry" these days.

Back in the 1900's, kids would flip to see Tom and Jerry. Even the fat kids. They would do a complete back flip and stick the landing. The story about a cat trying but failing to catch a mouse was amusing at first but it's quickly getting old.

They hardly even make the cartoons anymore. Now they only make movies. The only "Tom and Jerry" cartoons you see on TV nowadays are re-runs from the 1900s.

Anyway, Tom lived in the same house as his brother, Butch. Butch was also in the show but only as a side or back-up character. Jerry also lived in the same house. Jerry was really the star of the show aside from Tom. Lastly, there was Spike and his son. Spike was the third most popular character on the show and his son Tyke also appeared occasionally.

Right now, Tom was sleeping on his bed. The curtains were closed in order to block out the sun. He was having a serene, peaceful, and dreamless sleep. Many people who knew Tom have often stated that he was more likable when he was asleep.

This was very much true since Tom is not a person who you would want to hang around with often. And to tell the truth, no one did except for Jerry, Spike, Tyke, and his brother Butch.

So Tom was having a peaceful sleep on his bed, completely undisturbed.

Suddenly, his door was kicked in and Tyke ran in.

"UNCLE TOM!" Tyke yelled.

Tom immediately woke up.

"Leave me alone" Tom muttered darkly.

"UNCLE TOM!" Tyke yelled.

Tom ignored Tyke and tried to get some more sleep.

"UNCLE TOOOM!" Tyke yelled again.

Tom ignored him. He wasn't going to let some brat disrupt his sleep.

Tyke called his name a few more times before realizing that his tactic wasn't going to work. He had to find a different way to wake Tom up. Cold water to the face always works.

Then Tyke left the room in order to get cold water. Tom heard Tyke leave and smiled to himself.

'The brat must have gotten bored and decided to leave me alone' Tom thought.

But, oh, he couldn't be more wrong.

Tyke ran into the room again with a bucket of cold water in his hand.

Then Tyke threw the water at Tom. Unfortunately, Tyke had bad aim and the water had hit Tom's computer instead.

Tom's computer, now covered in freezing cold water, had short circuited and it exploded, taking Tom with it.

Tom was blasted out of the room through the door, landing in a charred heap on the floor, mentally cursing Tyke with every colorful word that he knew.

If Tom was sleepy before, then he was wide awake now.

"Blast it, child! What do you want?" Tom asked.

Tyke, seeing that Tom was awake and had his undivided attention, had decided to declare his original purpose for disturbing Tom.

"Well," Tyke started, "I was hoping if you could make me a sandwich"

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" Tom yelled.

Tom literally kicked Tyke out of his room. Tyke flew through the hall and landed down the stairs with a big crash.

Tyke didn't even flinch, whimper, or cry; which suggested that he was used to this sort of treatment from Tom.

Tyke knew that Tom probably wouldn't have made him a sandwich in the first place, but it was worth a try. Of course, Tom had refused to.

It was a shame. Tom made the best sandwiches.

XXXXX

Tom had just brutally kicked Tyke out of his room. And he was freaking mad. How dare that brat disturb his sleep just for a sandwich! Tyke always said that his sandwiches were to die for, but he really will die if he kept this up.

Tom took a look at what remained of his computer. It was totally destroyed now. The explosion had totaled it.

Tom cursed Tyke once more before picking up his busted computer. Oh well, it was time to buy a new one anyway.

"Tom, are you being mean to Tyke again?" A voice asked.

Tom looked on the ground beside him and saw Jerry.

"No, I'm not being "mean" to the brat." Tom replied.

"Oh, so you were being nice to him. That explains why I saw him flying through the halls and down the stairs" Jerry said sarcastically.

Tom rolled his eyes at Jerry's comment.

"I wasn't being mean to him. I was simply giving him what he deserved."

"And what does he deserve, Tom?" Jerry asked.

"He deserves a good, thorough beating! Look what the mini-fool did to my computer!" Tom said.

"So what? That thing is old anyway. You've had it since 2001. When are you going to get a more modern computer?" Jerry asked.

"That is irrelevant. The point is, if I had to choose between putting up with the brat all day, and jumping off a cliff, I'd choose the second choice. It's obvious that Spike doesn't do anything worth a darn when raising him" Tom said.

"That's kinda harsh" Jerry said.

"But it's true. Tyke is nothing but a selfish and spoiled brat." (1)

"Come on, Tom. Tyke has his good points" Jerry said.

"Name one" Tom said.

"Well…uh…um…" Jerry stuttered.

"That's what I thought" Tom said.

Tom had turned around and walked down the stairs. He had decided that he probably wasn't going to get much more sleep at this point.

Besides, he had to go to the studio today. They were filming a new Tom and Jerry movie.

Tom had decided to brace himself for what was sure to be a long day. He walked into the kitchen, intending to get a cup of coffee.

Spike was already in the kitchen making some breakfast.

"Good morning, Tom" Spike said.

"Hmph, if you can call this a good morning" Tom said bitterly.

Tom went to the place where he always kept some coffee, while Spike was fixing some pancakes. Spike had just finished putting the pancake batter in the pan.

Tom had grabbed his coffee and heated it up. Once he was satisfied that his coffee was warm enough he grabbed it and prepared to drink it. (2)

Tom had taken a nice, big sip of his beloved coffee, before spitting it out and straight into Spike's pancake batter.

"Do you mind? You just ruined the pancakes" Spike said.

"What the heck is this? This isn't my coffee!" Tom said angrily.

"Of course it isn't. I have taken the liberty of replacing all the coffee with nutritional health drinks"

"Well, what would possess you to do a thing like that?!" Tom asked.

"Well, you should know that coffee isn't good for you. All that caffeine can't be good for your body. Which is why I've replaced it with this health drink. It's full of rich vitamins that will give you enough energy to last the rest of the day, let alone the temporary jumpstart that coffee gives you."

"Well, this "health drink" tastes like something has been swimming around in it. I want my coffee!" Tom said.

"Hey, if you don't like it then don't drink it. But if you want coffee then get it yourself 'cause I'm not gonna provide it anymore. And by the way, you ruined the pancakes!"

"AND WHY SHOULD I CARE?!" Tom shouted.

"BECAUSE THAT WAS OUR BREAKFAST!"

"WELL, HERE'S WHAT I THINK OF YOUR BREAKFAST!"

Tom threw the rest of his health drink at Spike.

Then Spike took his pancake batter and splashed it at Tom.

Then Tom took some ketchup and splashed it at Spike, who retaliated by shooting mayonnaise at Tom. Tom took a tomato a threw it at Spike and it hit him straight in the nose.

Spike took a breadstick and slapped Tom across the face. Then, Tom took a block of cheese and smashed it into Spike's face.

It wasn't long before the entire kitchen became a war zone.

Tom and Spike grabbed any food that they could get could get their hands on. It wasn't long before they ran out of food to throw. But that didn't stop them. Spike picked up a spoon and threw it at Tom, who blocked it with a pan and threw it at Spike. While Spike was distracted, Tom picked up a chair and threw it at Spike but he missed.

Then Butch walked in the kitchen. His eyes were closed and he was humming as he listened to some music on his iPod. If he was paying attention, he would have seen the flying chair that was headed straight for his face.

BAM!

Butch clutched his aching face with his hands. He didn't say anything. His pain was beyond words. Eventually, he looked up to see Spike and Tom staring at him. He looked beside him and saw a chair on the ground.

The chair had a big dent in it. A dent that was shaped like his face.

The math did itself.

"Which one of you threw that!" Butch yelled.

Spike pointed at Tom who had an unrepentant and uncaring look on his face.

"Sorry" Tom said.

If Tom truly felt sorry for hitting Butch, he didn't show it.

"SORRY?! You threw a chair at me!" Butch yelled.

"Well, if it makes you feel better, I was aiming it at Spike." Tom said.

"You threw a chair regardless. And it hit my FACE!" Butch yelled.

"Then you shouldn't have been in the way" Tom said.

Butch looked at Tom incredulously.

"Sometimes I wonder how in the world we could possibly be related." Butch said.

"I wonder that too. You're such a moron that it makes me sick. And we don't even look alike aside from the fact that we're both cats" Tom said.

"You know Tom, I can see why Spike was fighting with you! Sometimes, you just need to be hit. You just need to be punched in the face every once in a while!" Butch yelled.

"And are you volunteering to do it?" Tom asked.

"Yes, MAYBE I AM!" Butch yelled.

"LAY ONE FINGER ON ME AND YOU WON'T HAVE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE TO REGRET IT!"

"JUST SHUT UP FOR ONCE, TOM! SHUT UP!" Butch said.

There was a long, uneasy moment of quiet after that.

"Wow. You two have more similarities than I thought" Jerry said.

Tom, Butch, and Spike(who had thankfully kept quiet while the brothers were arguing) turned to see Jerry standing beside them.

No one had noticed Jerry enter the room. Then again, Jerry was so small that no one could hear him unless they had sonic hearing.

"Unfortunately." Tom said in response to Jerry's comment.

"What do you mean 'unfortunately'. You make it sound like a bad thing to be related to me!" Butch said.

"It IS a bad thing! Anyone who has to put up with you would call it a bad thing." Tom argued.

"Why…you…" Butch muttered angrily.

"Uh, guys?" Jerry said, "Can we not do this? I have a headache and I'm not in the mood to hear any more arguing."

"Finally. The first intelligent thing I've heard all day" Spike said.

Then Tyke wondered into the room.

"Excuse me" Tyke said, "Can I have a bowl of cereal?"

Butch looked at all the spilled and wasted food on the floor, courtesy of Tom and Spike's food fight.

"We don't have any cereal. Or any food for that matter, thanks to Tom and Spike." Butch said.

"What were you two fighting about anyway?" Jerry asked.

Tom and Spike looked at each other.

"We don't remember" Tom and Spike answered simultaneously.

"Oh for the love of…" Jerry started, "well now we have nothing to eat and all of us are hungry."

"Hey, how's about we go to a fast food restaurant and pick up some breakfast?" Spike suggested.

"Yeah!" Butch agreed, "We can go to the store later and pick up some food"

"Sounds reasonable" Tom agreed.

"Then it's settled" Butch said, "What should we eat?"

Spike and Tyke looked at each other and then back at the others.

"McDonalds!" The two dogs said.

Tom sighed.

"Not that horrid restaurant again" Tom said.

"What's wrong with McDonalds? They have good food." Spike said.

"No they don't! Their food is disgusting!" Butch said.

"Finally. Something me and Butch agree on" Tom said.

"OK. What do you suggest that we eat if not McDonalds?" Spike said.

"I hear Burger King sells breakfast nowadays. We could go there." Butch suggested.

"That place is horrid too, but it's much more bearable than McDonalds." Tom agreed.

"What? Come on, guys. McDonald's food is the bomb" Spike said.

"What! McDonalds is nasty! Burger King is cool" Butch said.

"A Burger King burger isn't as good as a McDonalds burger" Spike said.

"A McDonalds burger is more like death on a bun, it's so fattening and nasty." Butch argued.

Tom and Jerry looked on with annoyance on their faces as Butch and Spike tossed insults at McDonalds and Burger King back and forth.

Jerry grew angrier with each passing minute. Soon, he had had enough.

"SILENCE!" Jerry yelled.

Everyone had their eyes on Jerry.

"Now then, instead of arguing back and forth, I say we take a vote. All those in favor of eating McDonalds raise their hands" Jerry declared.

Spike and Tyke raised their hands.

"Hands down. Now then, all those in favor of eating Burger King raise their hands" Jerry said.

Tom and Butch raised their hands.

"Ok. So it looks like a tie. The dogs want McDonalds and the cats want Burger King. I guess it's up to me to be the tiebreaker. Now let's see. McDonalds or Burger King. I think I'll choose…"

XXXXXX

10 minutes later

Tom and Butch scowled as they pulled up in front of McDonalds. Tom, Jerry, Butch, Spike, and Tyke were in a minivan with Tom at the wheel.

Jerry had picked McDonalds over Burger King which is why they were here. After this, Tyke would get dropped off for school and the rest will go to the studio. They pulled up in front of the drive-thru menu.

"Hello." The voice on the intercom said, "Can I help you?"

"I hope not." Tom said with a scowl on his face.

"Yes. We would like to order some breakfast." Jerry said.

"Ok. What would you like?" The intercom voice said.

"I would like to bring a zombie apocalypse down on all of you!" Tom said bitterly.

"I'll take an order of hotcakes with a side of-" Spike started.

"Darkness and misery if I have my way" Tom interrupted.

"Hash browns along with-" Spike said.

"Despair." Tom said.

"Tom, shut up!" Jerry said.

"Eggs and-" Spike said.

"Make me, you moronic mouse!" Tom interrupted.

"Sausage and-"

"I'm not in the mood for this, Tom! You don't want to make me do something I'll regret" Jerry said.

"And an extra order of biscuits with-" Spike said.

"Your very existence ought to be something you regret!" Tom yelled.

"As for the drink, I would like to have a bottle of-"

"Spiders!" Tyke said, figuring that he should pitch in and say something.

"Will you guys shut up and LET ME ORDER!" Spike said, having finally lost it.

"Not until Tom apologizes!" Jerry said.

"Feh. I would rather eat a snail. If you ask me, whoever created this putrid restaurant deserves to get dragged out into the street and shot. Three times. In the face." Tom said.

"Don't you think that's a violent thing to say in a 'K' rated fanfic? KIDS are reading this for crying out loud!" Butch said.

"So what? The children can go drown in a lake for all I care." Tom said.

"I think you're scaring the young readers." Jerry said.

"Good. At least I'll be able to spread SOME fear by noon." Tom said.

"Remind me again why I tolerate you in my household." Jerry said.

"It's MY household too!" Tom said.

"Yeah. But not for long if you keep acting like this. In fact, all those in favor of evicting Tom, raise their hands." Jerry said.

Everyone in the car raised their hand. The author of this fanfic raised his hand. Even the readers raised their hands.

"Grr. The whole universe is against me." Tom said.

"Umm. Sirs? Your orders?" The intercom voice said. She sounded extremely nervous and slightly frightened.

There was no doubt in Spike's mind that this was Tom's fault.

Darn it. Why couldn't he have a normal family.

The minute he got enough money, he would take himself and his son to get a new house. A house that was far away from Tom, who was obviously a bad influence on his son.

Satisfied that no one was going to interrupt him this time, he re-stated the order that he had given earlier.

This was turning out to be a long day. And it wasn't even 8:00 yet.

XXXXX

- end of chapter -

A/N: I don't know what possessed me to write a Tom and Jerry fanfic. But oh well. I might as well finish what I started.

As for you Tom lovers, I apologize in advance for any discomfort you may have felt at seeing Tom act this way.

All I can say is: If you don't like it, then don't read it! I don't need any flames! Constructive criticism is welcome but flames are not!

(1): I say that Tyke is a spoiled brat for many reasons. On the Tom and Jerry episodes where Tyke appears, Spike always lets Tyke get whatever he wants whenever he wants.

And whenever Tyke gets hurt, even if it's Tyke's own fault, Spike always shifts the blame to someone else(Usually Tom). And Tyke always gets what he wants.

It is for these reasons and several others that I have decided to make Tyke the spoiled brat.

(2): No one in my household drinks coffee. I don't know how coffee is made since I've never even SEEN it before except on TV so if this isn't how you make coffee then don't whine to me about it.