Title: The Lost Perspective

Chapter Title: White Blank Page

Summary: A fiery pain spread out from his shoulder and he tried to slow down the blood seeping out. But he didn't have time for that. For two feet away from him, his partner lay dying and there was nothing he could do about it.

Author's Note: This is the last chapter sadly … This is where it ends. But before I let you go I would like to take a little time to say THANK YOU! To all of you who have left kind and encouraging reviews, added the story or even me to your lists of favorites or alerts. It is a support I absolutely love and adore and you give me courage to continue writing stories. It may sound cheesy, but noting makes me happier than seeing a positive review on a chapter in my inbox. (Okay, maybe a few things, but you get the picture.)

I don't know if any of you read these or just skip ahead to the story … so maybe I could be talking to myself. Well, reading it or not … Know that I thank you with all of my heart!

Now, enjoy this final chapter and don't forget to post your final thoughts!

Disclaimer: For the final time, I do not own anything or anyone you might recognize. This is written for entertainment purposes only.

The whole family had waited anxiously for almost a day.

Since the Bitterman Housing Projects had been made a safer place and Santana had been put permanently behind bars along with the rest of his gang, the only thing that was missing from complete closure was Jamie.

The entire Reagan household was cooped up in his room, waiting for him to wake up. Not a single family member wanted to leave and none left the room for more than half an hour. Frank never strayed far from his youngest son's side and occupied the chair next to his bed most of the time, refusing to leave him for as much as a single moment. As the day had passed, the ventilator had been turned off and the tube had been removed from Jamie's throat and the fake mechanic noise had been replaced by Jamie's deep but troubled breathing.

Most of the family was asleep when it finally did happen. The heart monitor spiked and Jamie began twisting and turning his head from side to side. He moaned when he started to come to, feeling the fiery pain that erupted from his chest and head. He was coaxed back into the land of the living by Erin with her iron grip on his hand on one side and his father gently speaking to him on the other.

You could hear the collective sigh of relief that ran over every Reagan's lips and feel the heaviness, full of despair, in the air vanish when Jamie sluggishly blinked open his eyes. They focused instantly on the worried face of his father and a small smile played out on his lips.

He rasped out a weak 'Dad'.

Relieved smiles broke out upon hearing the weak, but lucid voice.

But it lasted no more than a few minutes, before fatigue grabbed a hold of the injured Reagan again. His eyelids began dropping slowly and after a comforting assurance from his father, they drifted completely shut.

But just before sleep took him, Jamie mumbled a sentence only the two nearest Reagans could hear. Both of them paled significantly and solemnly looked at their beloved sleeping family member.

"Where's … Vinny?"

Ten days later

The hard stone looked cold. The grey, subtle colors seemed to match the gloomy cloudy weather that lingered above his head and the crisp wind that blew across the cemetery and tore at his clothes. It certainly matched his mood.

He tried to fold inwards on himself to protect his body from the icy bite, but his arm was still mostly immobilized by the white sling and pain stabbed through his entire body, so instead he let the wind caress his face and clear his mind. Its cold pricked at his eyes and made them water, but it didn't really matter, because tears were already threatening to fall.

His hazel orbs fell onto the scripture on the tomb stone he stood in front of and he swallowed the lump that was caught in his throat.

Vincent Cruz

August 17th 1978 - May 2nd 2013

A hero till the end

A hero till the end … Jamie somehow felt disgusted by that sentence. Vinny held on with everything he could and he was a hero in every aspect of the word. But there should never have been an end to it. The end had been cruel and sudden and he didn't deserve to die by two cowards hiding up on a roof. He didn't deserve to die and Jamie didn't deserve to live.

If anything, he should be lying right there next to him. Why should Vinny die and he himself live? It made no sense at all and Jamie wasn't sure he understood what God had intended, if he was even there anymore. It seemed like he wasn't, because if he was he wouldn't have taken his partner so soon and so violently.

He couldn't comprehend that Vinny was actually dead. His mind refused to believe that his partner was dead and he expected him to pop out of a hiding place, laughing his ass off.

"You didn't think you could get rid of me so easily, did ya Reagan?"

He could almost hear his voice and he wondered if it was just the pain medication or if he was going crazy. His shoulder throbbed again and he was reminded that he was in fact alive and that Vinny wasn't. He wished he could just go numb so he wouldn't have to feel anything. So that he could be free from feeling the constant pain of both the gunshot wound and the loss of his partner and friend, free from feeling like a failure for having survived.

Most of these thoughts were irrational, he knew because he had felt some of them before when both Joe and his mother died.

Joe …

A shutter went down his spine as a distant memory reached his mind. It had been so real yet he knew it hadn't been … it couldn't have been.

"Figured I might find you here," a voice tore him out of his thoughts. He didn't need to turn his head to know it was Danny.

"You here to tell me to go home, rest?" Jamie said, his eyes never leaving the grey hunk of stone in front of him.

"No."

This got his attention and finally he met his older brother's eyes. He saw a deep concern and sadness.

"I'm here to keep you company," Danny stated firmly and crossed his arms when he too felt the cold wind hug his skin. He eyed his baby brother. "How you're doing?"

"I'm alright."

"Cut the crap, kid. I can see right through you. Other than the obvious, something else's bugging you."

"Danny …"

"Kid, come on, tell me what's wrong."

"It isn't …"

"Please." Danny's eyes were just as pleading as his voice and both were heavy with concern.

Jamie sighed and evaded his eyes, contemplating whether or not he should tell him. Ultimately, the choice was made easily. "I saw Joe."

Surprise colored Danny's features.

"When I was … under. It was brief. It barely lasted a second. But I saw him."

"Did he talk to you?"

"He told me to stay strong."

"I guess he's always looking out for us, huh?" Danny said with a solemn smirk.

"For the briefest of moments I thought I saw Vinny there too, right next to Joe … I should have protected him better." A condescending tone crept into his voice, full of loathing and anger. Danny knew they weren't talking about Joe anymore.

"Jamie …"

"I knew it was a trap and yet I didn't get him out of there. I wasn't fast enough to save him … I should have saved him. Should have done more …" His voice dropped to a whisper and faded slowly.

"You did everything you could."

"Then why doesn't it feel like I did?" Finally Jamie raised his eyes to meet Danny's and the older Reagan saw all the hurt and despair in those hazel orbs.

"That's just the grief talking. You listen to me when I say you did everything you could. You stopped the life from leaving him in that courtyard until help arrived with a bullet in your shoulder. You kept him alive as long as you could," Danny grabbed a hold of Jamie's shoulders, careful not to put too much pressure of his wounded one. He was desperate to make his brother see reason. "You did your part and everybody else did theirs. You can't be angry at them and least of all yourself. If you want to place blame on anyone, place it on Santana. That scumbag is the only guilty one in this and now he's paying for it."

"He died alone …" Jamie whispered.

"No, he died among friends," Danny was quick to counter. "Right now, you're hurting and that's okay. Just remember that you are not alone either. I'm here for you. You are my brother and I love you. Never forget that."

Jamie looked up from the ground and finally Danny saw some of the light and hope return on his eyes. A small smile slowly spread across his lips. "You've been reading too many of Linda's books."

Danny couldn't help but smile back. He was glad to see some of his baby brother still remained. "You know me, kiddo. Books aren't exactly my style."

Jamie laughed. The first real laugh he had done since waking up.

"Come on, I hear Dad's making pork chops," Danny said and began leading his brother away from the cemetery, towards the car.

"Hey Danny?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," Danny said and placed his hand on Jamie's uninjured shoulder. "Just don't go pull some crap like that again."

Jamie grinned.

"Deal."

And suddenly he knew. He knew that he was going to be okay. It would take time and a lot of effort, but eventually he would survive this. He would come out on the other side, stronger and wiser, and he would make Vinny proud.

THE END