Author's Note: This might be the last of my fluffy stories that are mostly fluff. So much cheese the FDA might have to regulate it. :)
Disclaimer: Trust me, the real owners of Batman are as far away from me as possible.
The Hole Truth
The doorbell rang and Dick rushed down the hall to answer it.
"I've got it Alfred!" He called out.
"Very well." He heard Alfred's voice ring out from somewhere.
Shooting down passed the chest of drawers, he grabbed the doorknob and pulled it open.
Barbara Gordon stood on the other side.
"Hey, Babs." Dick greeted her.
She gave him a smile.
"Hey Dick." She greeted her best friend.
Dick smiled as he stared back at her.
She looked nice. Maybe he should tell her so.
No wait. She always looked nice. He should tell her that she looked nice-er.
Wait. That was asking for trouble.
Never mind, he wouldn't say anything.
"Come on in." He said waving his hand.
"Actually, can we go walking for a bit?" She asked. She seemed like she wanted to say something else.
"Ah, sure." Dick said, glancing around for his shoes.
"Hey, Alfred? Barbara and I are going out!" He called.
"The scones just came out." Alfred's voice could be heard saying.
"The scones just came out." Dick repeated to her in a pleading tone.
"So what? We can have one later." She told him.
Dick frowned. Scones were best warm.
"Alright." He said with a sigh.
"We'll have some when we get back!" He called out again.
"Very well. Be careful, it just rained."
"We will!" Dick promised.
He shut the front door.
It had just rained. The ground was still wet and a bit sloshy as they walked around the manor.
"Did you want to talk about something?" He asked her. He had been picking up on something as they walked.
They made a turn into the woodsy area. Large oak trees lined the beaten down pathway.
"Not uh, really." She finally said.
"Okay." Dick said. Obviously, she wasn't ready to talk yet.
He looked around at all the new growth on the trees. Spring really was the best season.
Look at all these buds Babs." Dick pointed out as he walked over to a young sapling.
"Dick!" Barbara said his name sharply.
He turned around.
She was nowhere to be seen.
"Babs? Are you there?"
"I'm . . . ugh . . . just fell into this hole. Over to your left, be careful."
Her voice echoed.
"Don't worry." He said walking forward. "I'm com . . ."
His footing gave out.
"My hero." Barbara said dryly.
Dick lifted his face out of the wet dirt and looked up at her.
He wiped his face off on his sleeve and stood up.
Barbara was dirty too.
"Look at my dress pants! They're covered in mud." She tried to brush them off.
"Well, at least they're black." Dick said trying to be helpful.
She gave him a glare.
"Dirt is brown." She pointed out. "Now what am I supposed to wear on my date?"
Dick felt his blood freeze.
He had forgotten about her date.
Dick couldn't believe that Brandon Shetland had the nerve to ask her out.
On the other hand—he couldn't believe that she had agreed.
Okay, to be honest, Brandon wasn't that bad of a guy. He wasn't stuck-up or snotty. He didn't go on and on about his father's business like all the other kids
would. He was pretty smart at chemistry and liked to read.
Dick decided to hate his guts the moment that he heard that he had asked Barbara out.
He tried to focus on the problem on hand.
The soil was too wet to attempt a climb out and unfortunately there were no branches lying anywhere near the opening of the hole.
"Well, what are you waiting for?" Barbara asked. "Call someone."
"Ah, I left my phone in the house. Don't you have yours?"
"In my purse in the house too." She said with a sigh. "Great. Just great."
She came to stand beside him and stared up.
"I thought I could wear these pants for a few hours and not get dirty—guess I was wrong."
"You never know what will happen when you come over." Dick said with a slight grin.
"Tell me about it." Barbara muttered.
"Well, your shirt is okay." He pointed out.
It was a silky orange shirt with a scoop neck. She looked cute.
"Yeah, that's something I guess." She admitted.
Dick looked around the muddy hole. There was a log lying in the middle. No rope. No twine.
"Okay . . . ideas?" He asked her.
"We are so lucky that Gotham isn't in trouble at this moment because a fat lot of good we would do. Robin and Batgirl are stuck in a hole and can't get out."
"Don't say that so loudly." Dick hushed her.
"Who's going to hear?"
"I don't know. You never know."
"Whatever. Let's just get out."
They both surveyed the opening.
"What if we did one of those lifts like those cheerleaders do?"
"You want to try and toss me out of here?" Barbara said staring at him in disbelief.
"Fine. What's your plan?" He asked crossing his arms.
Barbara licked her lips.
"Okay then. Let's try."
Dick tried to plant his feet firmly as he crossed his hands over one another. Barbara came over and tentatively placed one of her feet on top of his hands.
"Ready?" Dick asked.
"Yeah." She confirmed.
"Okay . . . 1 . . . 2 . . . 3" He felt her shift her weight onto his hands. He gave one great push up.
The next thing he knew, Barbara was falling back down towards him.
She slammed into him sending them both to the ground.
She smelled really good.
"Dick!" Barbara yelled at him—then she started laughing.
"At least I caught you."
"Yeah, in the sense that you stood there and let me fall on top of you." She said poking his chest.
She pushed herself off him.
"Okay, well next idea?" Dick asked getting up. He could feel mud seeping into his shirt.
"I don't know." Barbara said with frustration.
"All this bat-training and here we are."
"Don't remind me." Barbara said. "Bruce never had us do a stuck-in-a-hole exercise."
"Don't worry, as soon as we get out, we will be." Dick assured her.
"Seriously, what do we do?" Barbara asked. "Are we really just stuck here until someone comes looking?"
"Well Alfred expects us back for scones, and your dad will come to get you sometime."
Dick sat down on the log.
"So we probably have less than a twenty-five minute wait before Alfred comes looking." Dick surmised.
"But I will need to take a bath now and change. I will be late." Barbara said.
"For what?" Dick asked. Then it hit him. Her date.
It would serve Brandon right to get stood up.
What was he thinking asking Barbara out anyway? He didn't deserve her—no one at school deserved her.
"Dick are you listening to anything I am saying here?" Barbara said giving him a tap on his shoulder.
"Oh, not really." He admitted.
Barbara sighed and sat down on the log next to him.
"Shoot." She muttered.
Dick tried to think about ways to get out, but his mind was still fuming at Brandon.
"So what do you think of him?" Barbara asked.
"What?" Dick said shooting her a look.
"What do you think of Brandon?" She asked.
Dick froze.
He wanted to lie. To tell her that he was a horrible person who enjoyed spitting on puppies or something—but he couldn't.
"I didn't realize that you needed my opinion." He said standing up.
That was another sore point. She hadn't even asked Dick what he thought before agreeing.
"Well I want it." Barbara said. "I thought you would give me your opinion when I told you about it, but you seemed 'ho-hum' on the matter."
Dick gave a snort.
He wasn't being nonchalant about her question, he had been too angry to answer so he hid behind fake emotions. He did care; he was furious.
"He's fine." Dick stated. "Just fine. Seems nice. I've never seen him hit anyone or something."
Barbara raised an eyebrow.
"Okay, how about any helpful information?" She asked. "I mean, I know his parents have never been arrested or anything."
Dick twitched his lips. That had been the first thing that he had checked on when he got home. Barbara would never date the son of a criminal. To his
unhappiness, Mr. Shetland had no record. Dick had checked twice.
Bruce had accused him of misusing the bat-computer for personal reasons. Dick really didn't care.
"Well I don't really know." Dick stated to her as he walked around. "I don't talk to him a lot or anything."
"He seems smart." Barbara mentioned. "He's not on any math/science teams, but I can tell you that's he's smart."
Dick was floored.
When had his being in mathletes ever impressed her? And she was happy with some guy just being "smart"?
"I was hoping that you had more of an opinion Dick. You're my best friend. I thought you would care." She sounded hurt.
"Of course I care!" He said trying to defend himself. "I just didn't think that you cared about my opinion. What does it matter anyway? You've already said yes."
"Well, I don't want to go on a date with some jerk." Barbara snapped. "Is he a jerk?" She asked.
Dick's head screamed YES, but his mouth stayed silent. He was a jerk for asking her out.
"No, he's not a jerk." Dick reluctantly said.
"But you don't like something." Barbara pressed. "I can tell."
"It's nothing." Dick waved her off. He was trying really hard not to be biased here.
"Well tell me. We have nothing else to do."
She was staring at him hard. She got up to be on eye level with him. He quickly sat down on the log.
"So what's the problem?" She asked again.
"It's not a big deal. He's a nice guy. He's fine. He probably helps little old ladies cross the street, and takes in any stray pets."
"Stop being silly Dick." Barbara ordered. "If it's really no big deal, then look me in the eye and tell me so."
He froze and swallowed.
"It's no big deal." He said firmly looking at her.
"I don't believe you." Barbara replied.
"What's wrong with you then?" Dick snapped. "Just go with him."
"I can't we're stuck in a hole."
"Well that's . . . a lousy excuse." He ended with softly.
Barbara kept her eyes on him.
Wow, he was fooling no one here.
She sighed.
"Oh, well. I guess it doesn't really matter anyway too much." She mumbled.
"Why's that?" Dick asked suspiciously.
She shrugged.
"I guess . . . I mean, it's not like I like-like him or anything, but nobody has really ever asked me out before. My mouth just said yes."
Dick gave a sigh of relief. She didn't actually like Brandon.
"Thank heavens." He muttered.
"What was that?" Barbara questioned.
"Nothing . . . uh, just thank heavens that there's not a wild animal down here or that it's not raining or something." Dick sputtered out.
Her eyes narrowed.
What wasn't he telling her?
An idea flew across her mind.
She decided to act upon it.
Walking over towards him, she promptly sat down sideways—directly on his lap.
"Uh, Babs?" Dick said looking uncomfortable. "What are you doing? Get off."
"I don't want to get my pants any more dirty than they are." She said firmly.
His legs had tensed up.
"Well you can't just . . ." He shifted his legs while trying to look around as if there was someplace to go.
Barbara smirked. She had his attention now.
"So, what is it that you aren't telling me?" She asked.
"Nothing. Just forget it." Dick said. He still wasn't looking at her.
"Come on Grayson, spill already." She demanded.
Dick pressed his lips together.
Stupid Brandon. This was all his fault. Nothing would have happened if he had just kept his mouth shut.
Did Barbara have to sit that close? Things felt awkward with her sitting there.
"I'll move as soon as you tell me. Otherwise, I'll sit here until we are found."
Dick hated Barbara's threats. She always followed through.
"I . . . I'm just . . . mad that he asked you." Dick finally said.
"Was he supposed to ask for your permission or something?" Barbara wanted to know.
"No!" Dick said swinging his face around to see her. "I just wished . . ."
"Wished what?"
That I would have asked you first.
"Nothing. I don't even know what I am saying." Dick said shaking his head.
He hoped that Alfred would start looking soon.
Barbara stared at Dick wishing that she could read his mind.
"Seriously, can you get off?" Dick asked sounding annoyed. "I told you already."
His blue eyes flashed at her and he shifted his legs again.
"What aren't you telling me here?" Barbara demanded to know. There was something else, she could tell there was.
"Nothing. Now get off." He ordered.
Their gaze met and both stared firmly at each other.
Dick really wanted her to get off, but having her there was kind of nice. She had such striking blue eyes which were framed by her vibrant red hair.
He needed to break her gaze before something happened.
Barbara risked a smile as she realized how messed up Dick's hair had become. He had always been terrible about keeping it straight and only Alfred's careful
watchfulness made sure that the boy never left the house with it looking messy.
He had such a warm smile. No matter what her mood, when he gave her a smile she had to smile back.
She wished he would just tell her what up. He always had to act this way, like it was nothing when there was something.
He could be such a goof.
Maybe that was one of the things she liked about him so much.
She should probably stop looking at him now . . . she couldn't.
Before she could talk herself out of it, she leaned forward and brushed her lips against his.
He seemed slightly stunned as she pulled away, but he didn't say anything at first.
"Babs . . . I just . . . I don't want you to go."
He softly admitted it.
"Oh, Dick." Barbara said as she bump her head lightly against his.
Dick gave out a slight laugh as he looked at her again. He couldn't believe that she had just kissed him.
She gave him a smile and ran her arms around his neck.
Dick had to steady himself so that he wouldn't fall off the log.
Her soft lips met his again.
Taking his hand off the log, he slowly wrapped his arms around her waist.
He pulled her closer as she gave him another kiss.
He fell off the log backwards with Barbara falling on top of him.
"Sorry." She apologized with a grimace. She was pretty certain that his entire back was covered in mud again.
"No, it's okay." He said honestly with a slight laugh.
At this point, he could be stuck in the middle of the desert instead of a hole and he would be perfectly happy about it.
Barbara had just . . . had been . . . was kissing him.
"Here let me . . ." Barbara offered out her hand and helped him up.
His back was covered in mud.
"Alfred won't even let you in the house." Barbara warned him.
Dick shrugged.
"Oh, well."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Barbara said amazed at him.
"What do you mean? You're the one who kissed me. Maybe you should tell me something." He pointed out.
Barbara bit her lip.
He was right.
"Okay, um . . ."
"BARB? DICK? Are you kids out here?"
"Miss Gordon? Master Dick?"
Barbara and Dick both started at the sound of Commissioner Gordon's and Alfred's respective voices.
"Down here! But be careful!" Barbara called out. "All we need is all of us trapped down here." She mentioned to Dick.
"That would be funny. Then Bruce would have to save us." Dick noted with a smile.
"There's a sink hole so be careful!" Barbara called up again.
Her father's face soon appeared over the edge.
"Are you two okay? Anything broken?" He asked. "Both of you are a mess."
"We know." Barbara said dryly.
"Alfred went to grab a rope so both of you hang tight okay?" Her father's head disappeared.
In a few moments a rope dropped down from above into the hole.
"Give it a good tug Barb before you start to climb!" Her father called down. "I have it anchored onto a tree and Alfred I will pull you up."
"Okay!" Barbara called up. She gave the rope a tug. "Seems okay."
Barbara put her foot against the side of the hole's walls and waited for her foot find a good hold. The walls were still soggy from the rain. Her feet sunk a little
as she started to climb. Dick stood at the bottom carefully watching her.
Halfway up, she started being pulled up until she could reach her father's hand.
"There you go Barbara. Safe and sound." Gordon said. "You ready Dick?" He called down.
The rope was thrown again into the pit.
Dick grabbed it firmly and gave it a test tug.
"Master Dick. You are absolutely filthy." Alfred said while leaning over the ledge.
"I just noticed that Alfred, thanks." Dick replied sarcastically.
"That kind of talk young man will result in you being down there for longer than necessary." He retorted.
Dick huffed.
"Alright, up you come then." The Commissioner said, breaking into the conversation.
Dick adjusted his hands and was quickly out of the hole.
"You're here early aren't you dad?" Barbara questioned.
"Well, you kept telling me that you didn't want to be late for your date, so I decided to come early. Good thing that I did." He added surveying both of them.
"Oh, I forget that you had an engagement this evening." Alfred said addressing Barbara.
She shifted uncomfortably.
"Uh, yeah . . ." She had forgotten about that. Brandon. What was she going to do about Brandon?
"Well let's get you home and into the shower." Her dad said. "You can give him a call on the way home. Maybe you two can reschedule or something."
Or something. Barbara thought.
She glanced over at Dick who at the moment was choosing not to look at her,
"Come Master Dick, let's see what we can do with you." Alfred said.
"You don't have to look at me like I'm a lost cause or something." Dick noted.
"Perhaps not." Alfred said with a smile. "Come then."
The group of four made their way back to the manor.
Barbara retrieved her purse and her and Dick said an awkward goodbye.
Both of them wanted to talk about it, but there were too many people around.
"Have you tried calling him yet?"
Barbara shook her head as she fiddled with her purse strap.
She was sitting in the passenger seat on a towel that Alfred had lent them. She pulled out her phone—not that she had any idea of what she was going to tell
him.
Taking a look at it, she was surprised to find that she had a voice message from Brandon himself. She bit her lip and played the message.
Hey Barbara, it's ah, Brandon
Listen, this may be stupid and really none of my business but something has been bugging me. Ah, I don't really know how to put this but . . . let me start over. So I
wanted to go out with you, but I was pretty certain that you were hanging out with Dick, but then someone told me you two weren't together so I decided to ask you.
And as happy as I was that you said yes I couldn't help but notice the pause in your answer. The next few days afterwards, I am certain that Dick was being cold to
me. Not that we talk much or anything, but I know that he is usually a nice guy. So maybe I'm reading too much into this, but I kind of think maybe you two have
something even if you don't realize it. Then again—I could be dead wrong. Anyway, if after you get this message you still want to go out, give me a call—if not, it's
really no big deal, and if you do realize something—maybe you should give Dick a call."
Barbara stared in to her phone in silence.
How is it some random guy could see so clearly what she had been blind to?
He really did seem like a nice guy; he deserved to be with someone who wasn't . . . completely in love with their best friend.
Barbara shoved her phone back into her purse.
"Not answering?" Her father guessed.
"Something like that." Barbara mumbled.
"Sorry it got messed up."
"It's okay, really." Barbara said honestly.
"Really?" He questioned sounding surprised.
She nodded.
"Really."
"Good . . . I mean it's good that you aren't broken up about it." Her father added quickly.
Barbara had to smile.
Were all the men in her life hiding what they really thought?
"Do you think I could go back to the manor after I take a shower?" She asked.
"Uh . . . I guess." He said giving her a questioning glance.
As soon as she got home, Barbara pulled out her phone and called Dick.
It took five rings, but he picked up.
"Hey."
"Hey." He answered shortly.
"Are you clean yet?" She joked.
"Ha. Not even in the house yet. Alfred is certain that I will make the entire house dirty on my way to the bathroom so he is laying down towels. I'm out on the
porch. It's getting cold out here."
"I was thinking. Does Alfred still have those scones?"
"Sure."
"Do you think I could come back over and have one?" She held her breath.
"Is Brandon going to want one too?"
Barbara rolled her eyes.
"You can stop being jealous of him."
"Why is that?" Dick wanted to know.
"Because our date is off—he called it off."
There was silence.
"What is wrong with that guy?" Dick said furiously. "Is he an idiot? First he has the nerve to ask you out and then he just drops you like . . ."
"It's alright. I'm not mad." Barbara said quickly trying to calm him down. "I'm glad. It saved me some . . . trouble. And he didn't just 'drop' me, he realized that I
liked someone else."
"And who's that?" Dick sounded envious.
"Guess who, goofball. So can I come over?"
"You really want to come over and have a scone with me?" Dick said softly.
"Yeah."
"Very well Miss Gordon." He said sounding cheerful. "Our first date over scones will begin in exactly one hour. Do not be late."
"I won't." She promised. "I won't be."
Barbara hung up the phone with a smile. She was going on a date after all.
Random End Notes: Wow, this is . . . I wrote this last August, does that get me off the hook? Yeah, I have no real defense for one. :)
{Dick/Babs because, HELLO! They are perfect for each other!}
Alright you know the drill. Advice, and (gentle) [be nice please! :}] criticism, would be appreciated. Or a haiku if you feel like one.