A/N: Hiya, guys! Sorry for not updating or doing anything lately, but now I have this. When I say "this," I mean the play script you see below. It is an attempt to mix the show "Pretty Little Liars" with Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. If you have seen "Pretty Little Liars," you will get some of our little hints. If you have seen or read Shakespeare's Julius Caesar, you will be able to capture a few of our little hints. But if you have seen and/or read both, you will be laughing so hard! Well, I hope you will. This was an English assignment, written by myself and four other girls. There is an accompanying film, but it is so awful and I would really rather not show it. Please let me know what you think, I would love the feedback!
Notes: Underlined lines of the script are iambic pentameter. Some are imperfect. Let's see if you guys can pick up the pattern, shall we? Also, I do not happen to own the copyright rights of "Pretty Little Liars" or Julius Caesar. Sorry if you thought I would say otherwise.
Caesar's Little Liars
Scene 1: Argument at School
[Location: School]
[Spencer, Alison, Emily, Hanna, and Aria are walking down the walkway, hanging up prom queen posters]
Alison [putting up posters, speaking in the general direction of Emily]: Emily, will you stop staring at my butt?
It makes me uncomfortable.
Emily [embarrassed]: Sorry. [turns head back to poster]
Alison [snarkily]: If you did that in the Dark Ages, you
would have been hanged.
Alison: What? It's the truth.
Aria: Alison, you don't have to be so rude!
Alison: You know what? Go die in a hole, Ari.
Spencer: Is there a reason that you are in such a bad mood today?
Alison: Yeah. You are still alive, Spencer Hastings.
Someone should poison you to shut you up.
Hanna: Ummm… Alison, that's kind of like… rude, right? I mean… we're your friends and
friends shouldn't say mean things to each other.
Spencer: Ali, I don't even know why you're doing this in the first place. The competitions for prom king and queen are always rigged to pick the prettiest, most popular couple in school. Since the 1980's, winning prom king and queen has been nothing but a stupid popularity contest that leaves everyone who genuinely wants the crown in the dust of the people who cheated their way to the top.
Alison: Spencer, Spencer, Spencer. It looks like the/
little green monster has reared its ugly/
head yet again. [walks cockily towards Spencer and intimidates her] You feeling jealous much?
Aria: Everyone, can we just change the subject?
Alison: Well, I haven't gotten to Hanna yet.
Hanna [confused]: Me what?
Alison: Suppose someone tries to shoot you. Would you/
still live? Would your flabbiness protect you?
Aria: Ok, you know what? I'm leaving. I can't deal with all of this.
Alison: Fine. Go. All of you, just go!
Spencer [to all]: Bye, guys. See you tomorrow, I guess.
Hanna: See you tomorrow, Spencer!
Emily: Hey, Alison, let's hang out before the sleepover tomorrow, 'kay?
[Alison nods in confirmation]
See you then!
[Exeunt omnes sed Alison]
Alison [Mischievous smile, CA close to face]: Little do they know what I have planned, with the help of my little pet. They may think that I am crazy now, but just they wait until they see me then!
[Exeunt Alison]
Scene 2: Slumber Party and Alison's Death
[Location: Spencer's house]
[Hanna, Emily, Spencer, and Aria are sitting in a circle]
Spencer: Ok, what was going on with Alison yesterday? I mean, a little rudeness is understandable, but this much?
Aria [shrugging]: Maybe the stress of prom is getting to her?
Spencer: No, no. It couldn't be that. [hesitates] Have you guys noticed that Alison has been acting a little… weird lately?
Hanna: Just a few little things here and there, yeah.
Aria: I guess she was acting a little weird on Tuesday…
Emily: No. She's been acting like normal Alison if you ask me.
Spencer: Emily, of course you don't think she's been acting weird. You haven't been spending as much time with her lately as we have. And believe me, she has been acting weird.
Emily: Fine. I'll just go talk to her right now myself.
[Exeunt Emily]
[Pan in on Alison and Emily]
Alison: Are they lured into the trap?
Emily: All lured. Are you sure that this is going to work, Alison?
Alison: Oh, it'll work. Do you remember the plan?
Emily: Yes, I do. First, we go back and you give the rest of the girls a batch of drugged cookies. Then we go outside once they are asleep and get you all set up on the ground with a fake dagger in your stomach and we put fake blood all around it, as well as a medicine ball under your arms to cut off the blood flow temporarily. Then I go back and lay down with the rest of the girls after cleaning up. After that, which you said should take about an hour, you shout out 'Et tu, Brute?' as the girls' drug is just starting to wear off, waking them all instantly. Then they all run outside and see you dead. You then go to our secret place when they all leave. The first death is mine, which is faked. My throat is slashed, so just some more of the fake blood and such. And then I do your other real killings…
Alison: Ok, that's enough. You get the concept. Let's go back in.
[Alison and Emily go back into the living room.]
Alison: Hey, guys! Whatcha talkin about?
Spencer [guiltily]: Nothing. What about you guys? What'd y'all talk about when you were outside?
Emily [hesitates but recovers]: Uhhhh…. I went outside and told Ali about what we were talking about in here and….
Aria and Hanna: You did what?!
Emily: Yeah, Ali deserved to know, but anyway, if you don't mind me sharing [looks at Alison for approval], the whole prom queen thing may seem stupid to some of you [looks at Spencer] but it really means a lot to her. That's why she's been acting the way she has.
Alison: Yeah, you guys, I am truly, truly sorry for acting the way I have. How about I bring out some cookies and we just continue to have an awesome girls' night, okay?
Spencer: Fine.
Emily: Okay.
Aria: Alright.
[Exeunt Alison]
[Enter Alison]
Alison: Here, I got the cookies.
[offers cookies]
Hanna: Yay, cookies! [face lit up by the thought of cookies]
Alison: Go ahead, eat up!
[Spencer, Hanna, and Aria each eat a cookie (or two or three)]
Hanna: Whoops! Sorry, I wasn't even thinking! Now there aren't any cookies for you or Emily, Ali!
Alison [wan smile on face]: It's fine. I'm on a diet anyway.
Spencer: Anyone up for a game of Truth or Dare?
Everyone else: Of course!
Alison: Who wants to go first?
[Sound fades and a transition is made]
[All the girls are laughing]
Alison: I'm going to step out and make a call. I'll be back soon.
[Exeunt Alison]
Spencer [yawning]: Wow I'm exhausted.
Hanna: I'm just… going… to… [falls over and sleeps, Spencer and Aria do the same, Emily pretends to fall asleep too]
[Transition is made and Emily is seen alone with Alison]
Emily: [pulling out knife] You ready?
Alison: Let's do this.
[Emily "stabs" Alison]
[Emily walks back inside to the sleeping girls and lays down]
Alison [off screen, dramatically shouts]: Et tu, Brute?
[Everyone else wakes up]
Spencer: Was that Alison?
Emily: I think so.
Hanna: What the heck did she say?
Aria: Can I go back to sleep yet?
Emily, Hanna, and Spencer [shout]: No!
Spencer: Let's go check it out.
[The girls go into the other room, see the corpse of Alison, and gasp in shock]
[All run toward the corpse]
Aria [says softly]: Alison.
[Spencer takes Alison's arm in her fingers to get a pulse]
Spencer: Still so warm. It's almost as if she is still alive. Yet she has no pulse and she is growing paler by the second. How could this happen?
[Puts head into her hands, slightly sobbing]
And why to her, of all people. Why?
Hanna [hesitant]: You guys all seem to be forgetting that just yesterday she was insulting all of us and today you are crying over her. What is wrong with you guys?
Emily, Aria, and Spencer [shout, but still a little snifflely]: Shut up, Hanna!
Hanna [embarrassed]: Sorry, guys. I'm just saying…
Spencer [cutting in]: Don't you dare even go there.
Emily [sobbing hard]: Guys, can you just go? I-I need some time alone with Alison.
Spencer: Emily, we all need some time alone with Alison.
Emily: No! You don't understand! We were closer than you all think we were! I need this more than you. Please, I am trying to say this nicely. Please leave us here.
Aria [hesitant]: Ok, Emily. We'll go, but remember to keep in touch.
[Exeunt Aria, Spencer, and Hanna while muttering out goodbyes]
Emily [muttering]: Goodbye, bitches.
[Helps Alison up slowly after she is sure that they are gone]
I'll make you proud, Alison.
Alison: Yes, I quite think you will.
[Exeunt Alison and Emily in different directions]
[Fade out]
[Fade back in, Emily, Aria, Spencer, and Hanna are back in the living room]
[Spencer's phone rings]
[Close up on Spencer's phone, focus on text]
Spencer: Y'all I just got this message from an unknown number. It says,
"It is always the good ones who fall first/
But wait… is she not a bad little girl -A"
[Fade out]
[Fade in]
[Spencer's phone rings again]
[Close up on Spencer's phone, focus on text]
Spencer: You guys I got another message. This one says,
"You think you have gotten rid of me right?/
Truth is I have always been by your side/
Who will be the next to fall? Choose wisely… -A"
Scene 3: Emily and Spencer's Deaths
[Location: Spencer's house]
[Camera will be looking in on the girls during the sleepover]
Spencer: Hey does anyone want something? Juice? Coffee? Water?
Hanna: Do you have any of those bow-tie crackers?
Aria: Not right now Hanna, we really need to talk about what happened to Ali.
Emily: Yeah totally, I wanna know why her? Why now? What did she ever do to anyone?
Spencer: I don't know but whoever came after her may just be after all of us, too!
Aria: Okay now I'm officially terrified! Can we just talk about something else?
[The girls chat for a little while longer about a bunch of other stuff, then they fall asleep]
[During the night Emily slips out to apply all the makeup to her neck to fake her slashed throat, not shown on camera]
[Early the next morning, Spencer wakes everybody up]
Spencer: Aria, Emily, Hanna, get up, I have to tell y'all something.
Hanna: Why are you waking us up at 2 A.M?
Aria: That is exactly what I was thinking!
Spencer: Never mind! Just wake up Emily. It's really important.
Aria [Lightly taps and shakes Emily's shoulder]: Emily, Emily!
[Aria brushes Emily's hair back and accidentally reveals her slashed throat]
Hanna: Oh my gosh! Who would do this! To Emily of all people!
Aria: I don't know, but it is now clear that this person is coming after all of us.
[Fade and zoom in on Spencer, phone rings]
[close up on Spencer's phone, focus on text]
Spencer: I just got another message from A.
"Don't forget that I am always watching/
We will meet again soon little witches/
Emily may be gone but I'm still here. -A"
Spencer: Okay guys, calm down. Just calm down. Ummm, someone call the police. Hanna, check to see if there is a pulse. [Hanna walks over to the body, but hesitates]
Hanna: Oh my God, I can't, Spencer, I just can't.
Spencer: You guys I can't take much more of this. First Ali, now Emily. I..I…..I…
Aria: Spencer, drink something and calm down. If you start freaking out, who's supposed to keep all of us in check?
[Spencer sips from the drink]
Spencer: Eww! [spits drink back into cup after drinking a bit] Oh God, that's disgusting. I guess my drink went sour over night or something. Did it just get louder in here? Guys, I can't breathe, guys. [falls off of couch and gasps on floor] [Hanna rushes over]
Hanna: Aria, get over here, something's wrong with Spencer. [Spencer stops gasping and exhales as she dies]
Scene 4: Aria's Death
[Location: Outside]
[Aria and Hanna walking down the street together] [camera should be in front showing Hanna and Aria walking towards it]
Aria: What's happening to everyone, Hanna?
Hanna: I don't know Ari. They're slipping away.
Aria: It's like someone is trying to kill us.
Hanna: And the scary part is they're succeeding.
Oh would you look at that? [points towards stand] A hot dog stand.
Aria [reaching for Hanna]: Wait Hanna, what if the killer is here-
[car rushes by and hits Aria, killing her, camera shot at several angles]
[Hanna hears crash and glances back, finding Aria's body on the street]
[Kneels down next to the body]
Hanna [quietly]: She had a feeling all along. I'm next.
Scene 5: Hanna's Death
[Location: Hanna's house]
[Receives text but does not see it, close up on phone]: Decisions, decisions... your's sealed her fate. -A
Hanna: I'm home, mom, and I am really hungry! [camera is following Hanna] [walks upstairs into room]
[Hanna throws backpack on floor and throws self on bed while looking up at ceiling with nostalgia]
Hanna [rubs bracelet on wrist]
[Flashback occurs and shows Alison giving everyone "friendship bracelets" at school]
Alison: You guys better not lose these, they're special. [zooms in on Alison handing Hanna the bracelet]
Hanna: So these are a symbol of our friendship?
[Alison nods and smiles]
[Hanna smiles back, camera fades back to reality]
[Flashback over]
[Camera is still on Hanna's face but her expression is changed to sadness]
Hanna [whispers]: Miss you guys; if only I knew the truth.
[Loud sound is heard]
Hanna [gasps]: Mom was that you downstairs? Did something fall? [camera turns to door]
[Dark-clothed figure holding a gun enters the room]
[Camera focuses on Hanna retreating towards a wall]
Hanna: Who the… get away… get away from me! [camera is now outside house where audience hears gunshot and sees light from Hanna's window turn off]
Scene 6: End Scene
[Location: School]
[Emily and Alison walk down the hall toward the doors]
[Before opening the doors, they turn around and hold their fingers to their mouths as if to shush]
[Walk through the doors]
Thanks for reading!