And here is introducing "Harry Potter and the Polyjuice Disaster"! This is thanks to a prompt from FredNeverDied, so kudos to her! I won't be updating this one as frequently as Learning to Breathe, because right now the focus is on that one, but this is a little fic on the side to have some fun. (Not that LTB isn't fun...hehe...)

A few warnings (or, why it's rated T): Mostly it's due to language, but also: while it never goes into explicit sex, or anything of the sort, there is a Sirius/Remus relationship, so in later chapters, Sirius, being Sirius, will probably make blunt comments about sex and/or sex with Remus, but it shouldn't be too graphic...so, that's why it's staying at a T rating and not M.

Now that that's out of the way, hope you guys love!

"Okay, no hints, no slip-ups – you have to be absolutely aware of who you are…or are, er, not, for the whole night. I don't want Lily skinning me alive when I come home."

Remus gave one of his best friends a small smile as he plucked a hair from his head with hardly a wince. "I know, Prongs, I know. I've had experience with polyjuice potion before, you know."

James sighed impatiently and dropped his own hair into the vial of potion in his hand. "I know. But it hasn't been around someone who's known you since you were eleven!"

Remus chuckled. "It'll only be for a few hours. Don't let Padfoot or Wormtail know you're me, either. Or…I'm you."

James nodded. "Yep. Got that down."

Remus grimaced as he looked down into the potion that would make him look like James Potter. "No matter how often I drink this stuff, it's awful every time."

"And you gotta drink it every hour until I get back," James teased. Remus sighed in resignation, but still didn't down the vile potion.

"Come on, Moony," James said, holding out his own vial and clinking it with Remus' with a grin. "Bottoms up!"

"Hey, it's late guys," James said around eight-thirty that night as he dismounted his broom. "I should be getting back home."

"Sure, mate," Sirius said. "I'll come home with you, yeah?"

"You don't have to," James tried as Sirius walked over.

"But I want to, Moony," he whispered, rubbing a hand suggestively over James' arse. James practically jumped out of his shoes. He'd forgotten that part…

"You don't have to, really," he tried again as Sirius began to kiss his neck.

"I'll be heading home now, guys," Peter said loudly, as though trying to remind them that he was there.

"See you later, Wormtail," Sirius called back without pulling away from James. A moment later there was the quiet pop of disapparation.

"Padfoot, stop, please," James said in a strained voice. "I gotta tell you something…"

"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off —"

A minute later, Remus Lupin dropped to the ground, eyes wide open as the black-cloaked figure stepped carelessly over his body to go up the stairs.

"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"

"Stand aside, you silly girl . . . stand aside, now. . . ."

"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead — not Harry! Please . . . have mercy . . . have mercy. . . ."

The pop of apparation was hardly heard on the strangely noisy street.

"…pressing my lips to your neck – grabbing your arse in my hand…" Sirius was ranting, but he stopped when he saw the street, and more importantly, what had once been James' house. The indignation immediately left his face to be replaced with horror.

"Oh, no," he breathed.

James began running forward. "No…no! Lily! Remus! Harry!"

Sirius trembled as James held Harry in his arms and sobbed over Lily's body in the other room. Harry's cries joined his own, though it was mostly out of confusion for the noise and the pain in his head. Remus' body, no longer looking like James, lied just feet outside the door. Sirius knelt next to him, tears streaming down his face in despair as he looked on his lover's blank amber-colored eyes.

"I'll kill him," Sirius croaked.

"What?" James rasped through his tears.

"Peter!" Sirius practically screamed. "I'll kill him! He did this! He betrayed us! He's the reason they're…" A sob wrenched itself from his throat, but he stood up anyway and prepared to leave.

"No!" James ran from the room and grasped Sirius' arm before he could go. "No, Sirius! No one knows he was Secret Keeper!"

"So what?!" Sirius cried, wrenching his arm away. "Don't you want revenge, too?"

"Of course I do!" James said, grabbing his arm again. "But we need to talk to Dumbledore first. We need a plan."

Sirius approached Peter finally on a busy street. It had taken less than a day to find the cowardly bastard, and Sirius was out for revenge. He wanted the rat dead for what he'd done to his one love and his other best friend.

"Peter, you traitorous bastard!" Sirius shouted, getting Peter's attention, as well as that of several Muggles in the area.

Peter looked left and right before he turned to face Sirius fully as Sirius stormed toward him.

"James and Lily, Sirius!" he trilled in his high, annoying whine. "How could you?!"

Sirius stopped short. What on Earth was he talking about?

"You betrayed them! You killed them! Why, Sirius?" Peter said in what could've passed as heartbroken desperation.

Sirius understood then. Peter of course didn't know that James and Remus had switched that night – they'd kept that information secret. And now Peter was trying to frame him.

"Haven't you heard, Wormtail?" Sirius called back. "James is alive! You killed Remus!"

Peter's eyes widened as he was in the act of pulling out his wand.

What came next happened in a blur. Peter chanted something, and Sirius recognized the spell and threw up his shield. A terrific blast overtook the street, and through the haze, Sirius saw Peter cut off his finger.

"No!" he shouted, even as he saw Peter transform into a rat and disappear into a hole in the ground along with the other rats. Pettigrew had escaped.

The smoke cleared as Aurors filled the street, revealing a massive crater in the ground and twelve Muggles lying dead around. People screamed and pointed to Sirius, the only one alive in the throng.

Sirius began laughing then. He couldn't help it. The one man they'd always underestimated had outsmarted them all.

Then someone was shaking his shoulders, trying to get his attention. Someone was shouting, but Sirius didn't hear over the roaring, pounding sound in his ears. Messy hair, glasses, wild hazel eyes blurred in front of him, shouting at him.

"He escaped," Sirius said hoarsely, and laughed again, throwing his head back as he shouted. "The rat escaped!"

A rat missing a single toe on his front paw ran up to the little boy with bright red hair. Help me! The rat thought mentally, panting wildly after his run.

The boy bent down and picked up the rat, and noticed the missing toe, still bleeding. "You're hurt!" he exclaimed in his childish voice. "Don't worry. I'll help you."

He quickly ran inside and held the rat up to his mum. "Mummy! Can I keep it?!"

James held Harry close to his chest as the child went back to sleep in the middle of the night. He sat in the rocking chair he'd saved from Godric's Hollow, rocking gently as he patted Harry's back, Harry's head resting on his shoulder. Sirius appeared in the doorway, looking sadly on the scene. Usually it was Lily that got up for their son.

"How are you holding up?" he asked, though the traces of his own tears remained on his face.

James shook his head, fighting back tears once again. "You?" he croaked.

Sirius sighed and sank down on the chair across from James. He didn't answer, saying instead, "How did Harry survive?"

James shook his head, remembering when he'd seen the bloody lightning bolt on his son's head that would be sure to scar as he got older. "Dumbledore's looking into it. I think it was Lily's sacrifice, though. She was looking into protection charms in the months before…" he swallowed, unable to say more. But Sirius understood what he was trying to say. He always did.

"I'm sorry, Prongs," Sirius whispered sorrowfully. "If I hadn't suggested changing Secret Keepers…"

"We've already been over this, Sirius," James said more sharply than he'd intended. "If this is anyone's fault, it's mine. I was the one who switched with Remus – that's the only reason he's dead right now."

"It's not your fault, James," Sirius insisted.

"Then it's not yours either."

A few days later the Wizarding World was still celebrating the fall of Voldemort as James and Sirius mourned the death of their two closest friends. The funeral was done – many had come – but still the pain resided in both their hearts.

Sirius was spoon-feeding Harry rice cereal in his high chair, and James had just gotten out of the shower. They were both living in Sirius' one-bedroom flat, though it probably wouldn't remain that way for long. Sirius and James had been sleeping in the same bed for the past few nights, which sometimes made for awkward situations when Sirius was sleeping and he subconsciously thought it was Remus and decided it was time to cuddle. James didn't give him too much grief for it, though he knew Sirius was a bit embarrassed by the situation and still heartbroken at Remus' sudden death. Harry had a crib on the other side of the room that he slept in. The room wasn't too small, but it was meant for only Sirius and Remus, so having three people living in it who weren't romantically involved made it cramped.

"We need to find another place, Prongs," Sirius said when James walked in. Though his back was to James, he had heard him come in and said the thing that he was thinking about for a while over the past couple of days.

"No, it's alright," James said quickly. "I have money in my vaults that I can get a flat for me and Harry…"

"James, you better not say what I think you're going to say, because if you're going to say what I think you are then we are going to have a problem." As he spoke, he scraped some of the rice cereal off of Harry's chin with the edge of the spoon and tried to put it in the drooling Harry's mouth again.

"So, we're in this together, then?" James said after a moment.

"Damn straight we are."

And there's the first chapter!

Also, something that would be great for you guys to help me with: for the next couple of chapters, I want to get some scenes of Harry growing up under Sirius and James' care, but I need IDEAS! I'm looking for all sorts of scenes, from fluffy, happy pieces to sad pieces and even to ones where Harry disobeys and needs reprimanding/punishment. Give me as many as you can think of! I'm trying to get the characters' development out there before I go into Harry being at school.

Also, I'm thinking I want Harry to make a friend before school, whether they be Muggle or wizard/witch. I don't really want an OC, but some ideas for who to use would be great...maybe Hermione or Ron, but perhaps Neville would be the better choice, considering how Sirius knew the Longbottoms...I dunno. You tell me!

Cheers! :)